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NOthing is more common a∣mong men then Marriage, and nothing is more unknown then the Duties of this so common a condition: The major part of them who engage themselves therein look only on its outside, and on that which it hath of carnal and terrestrial, and they do not at all inform themselves either of the obligations which it in∣cludes, or of the extreme difficulties there are to acquit ones self Christian∣ly therein. They embark themselves
and enter upon this voyage of their whole lives, without knowing whe∣ther they go, or what course they are to stear: and contracting an undis∣solvable alliance with a strange per∣son, they scarcely known him, who must be not only the Companion of their happiness or unhappiness in this life, but who must be one of the prin∣cipal causes thereof, both in this life, and for all Eternity.
To embrace solemnly a Regular life under the Obedience of a Superi∣our chosen among many for his Vir∣tues and for his good qualities, there must be at least a year of triall accor∣ding to the Ordinance of the Church: but to have a Maid rank her self un∣der the Obedience of a Husband, and take upon her the charge of a Family, (which requires almost the submissi∣on of a Religious person, and the prudence of a Superiour), they fan∣cy that no time is too short; they con∣clude these kinde of affairs in the space of a Month or Fifteen days,
without making reflection upon the dispositions and upon the qualities the persons have to acquit themselves of these Duties.
Yet when they are once engaged, there is no more means left to give back. They must keep on to the end of their earthly pilgrimage, and sa∣tisfy the duties of their condition, or renounce their salvation. They may well repent themselves of the rashness of their engagement, but they are no longer free to change it. Where∣fore they who finde themselves thus tyed up, seeing that God forbids them to disengage themselves, ought to be∣lieve that 'tis his will they should remain in that State, in whatever manner they entred into it; and that they should sincerely apply them∣selves to know and to practice that which he demands and expects of them.
The knowledge of these Obligati∣ons which the light of God gives to some Souls, which are thus engaged
without having maturely considered of it, is for them in some sort the be∣ginning of their Vocation. For if one cannot say that they were called to the State of Marriage, yet one can∣not doubt but that at least they were called in Marriage; and that suffices to move them to remain therein in peace and repose, according to the advice of St. Paul: Let every one re∣main in the Vocation and in the State to which God hath called him, 1 Cor. 7.20.
All then they have to do, is hum∣bly to adore the designes of God up∣on them, to content themselves with the measure of grace he gives them; and by not hiding from themselves the difficulties and the obligations of their State, to resolve to accom∣plish faithfully whatever God ap∣points them.
Now if the persons who have slieghtly engaged themselves in Mar∣riage are obliged not to hide from themselves the Difficulties and the Obligations of that Estate: they who
as you, my Sister, have not embra∣ced it, but after many Prayers and serious Reflections; may they neg∣lect them without being unfaithful to the lights and to the graces by which God hath made them conceive the Hope of being sanctified therein, by accomplishing the things which he exacts of them?
Wherefore to be in a condition to practice them yet more perfectly then you perchance have done hitherto; you must quit all humane sentiments and feelings, and raise up your self above all the low and carnal aspects which people have ordinarily of Mar∣riage, to the end you may enter into the sentiments of Christ Jesus, and into the designes he had in exalting this humane alliance to so high a dig∣nity.