Of peace and contentment of minde. By Peter Du Moulin the sonne. D.D.

CHAP. XIV. Of Jealousy.

JEalousy is much like Envy. In Greeke one word serveth for both. Yet are they of diffe∣rent nature. For a man is envious of that he hath not, but he is Jealous of that he hath.

Besides they are of different extractions. Envy

is the daughter of Pride, for to pride the envious man oweth the opinion he hath to be more wor∣thy of the advantages conferred upon others; but Jealousy is the offspring of a base mind that judgeth himselfe unworthy of that which he pos∣sesseth, and feareth that another be more wor∣thy of it.

Jealousy is a various and phantastical medley of love, distrust, revenge, sadnesse, feare, and shame. But that compound is not lasting, for love soone turnes into hatred, feare and shame into fury, and distrust into despaire. Solomon saith that jealousy is the rage of a man. Prov. 6.34.

The predominant passions in Jealousy (for Jealousy is many passions together) are, feare not to possesse alone what one loveth, and shame of what the world may say of it; this last especi∣ally tears amans soul with extream violence; so slavish is the voluntary subjection of weake spi∣rits under the opinion of others.

A wise man will keepe himselfe from that sharp yet imaginary evill, by a sincere love to his party, for perfect love casteth out feare. 1 Joh. 4.18. He that loveth his wife well will trust her, and that trust will make her faithfull, or nothing will. Fidelem si putaveris facies.

To that counsell of trusting his wife, the hus∣band must joyne a resolution not to mistrust him∣selfe. For here one may lawfully put on a good opinion of himselfe, the question being onely to

compare himselfe with others about pleasing a woman, which is obliged to study to please him; and cannot, without grievous crime and concei∣ving an enormous disproportion of merit be∣tweene him and others, bestow upon them that love which is due to him. A husband betrayeth himselfe and tempteth his wives weakenesse, when he discovereth a distrust of himselfe, and a feare that she preferre other men before him. This sheweth her the way to value them above her husband, and she thinkes herselfe justified so to do by her husbands judgement.

He must learne also to be credulous for his owne content, and of hard beleefe in the causes of discontent. For here it is better to be deceived in evill then in good, and it is better alwayes not to search an evill without remedy, then to finde it; especially when by seeking it, we make it come. The dishonour of cuckoldry consisting onely in opinion, it is healed also with opinion, and he that feeles it not, hath it not.

This inconvenience is prevented by making choice of a vertuous wife, and using her well, for restraint and hard usage doth but draw the evill; Also by keeping us free from defiling our neigh∣bours bed; This will give us a great confidence that God will not suffer any to defile ours; Most jealous men are adulterers, fearing what they have deserved.

But when one hath made an ill choyce, nei∣ther

kindness, nor justice, nor prudence, can keepe a light and ungratefull woman to her du∣ty; When the wrong is so manifest, that it is im∣possible for the husband not to know it, and dis∣sembling would be imputed to insensibility or even to consent; the right counsell for the ex∣teriour is, to be divorced from a wicked wife. But if one can neither marry againe, nor live without a woman, and feareth that he shall hardly be able to keep himselfe from harlots; of all harlots let him make use of his owne. It is better yet to keepe a lawfull whore, then an unlawfull.

As for counsels for the interiour, one must practise the grand remedy to remedilesse evils, patience. God, in this as in other sorrowes of life, will finde wayes of comfort & reliefe for those that trust in him, even where there is no way: The good company of so many brave men that are in the same row, is a help to beare it. A wise∣man will make no more strange of it, then of wearing a hat a la mode.

He must keepe fast to that true Maxime, that he cannot be dishonoured but by his owne faults, not by the faults of another. A vertuous mans honour hangs not upon a light womans behavi∣our. If it did, it should lye very unsafe. No more doth it depend upon his neighbours opinion. Persons of honour and judgement will never disesteeme an honest man for it. And as for the talk of the vulgar, honour and good fame de∣pend

no more of it, then of the gabbling of geese.