Five nevv playes, viz. The English moor, or the mock-marriage. The love-sick court, or the ambitious politique: Covent Garden weeded. The nevv academy, or the nevv exchange. The queen and concubine. / By Richard Brome.

ACT 4. SCENE 1.

Varillus. Tersulus.

Var.

We should love one another, brother Tersulus, More inwardly, and be in friendship true As our Lords are. Prithee let their example Piece up all difference betwixt us.

Ter.

Piece up,

I know your meaning and your jear Varillus, In your piece up.

Var.

Fie on thy jealousie. 'Cause thou art a Taylor, How ere a Gentleman by place, thou think'st I jear thy quality.

Ter.

You should not. For Look back unto the worlds beginning; there Youl' find a Taylor was before a Barber.

Var.

Nay if you go to rip up old Antiquity.

Ter.

Rippe! there he is again.

Var.

You may as well Collect, that the first man (who you suggest Was his own Taylor) was his own Barber first.

Ter.

As how?

Var.

Do you think he did not scratch his head In casting how to fashion out his breeches? And that's in part, you know, the Barbers office.

Ter.

The scraching of the head.

Var.

And still In use 'mongst Taylors on themselves. But note The foul corruptions brought in by Time; Of old they did but rub invention up, How to contrive their work: But now their heads Wrists, fingers, all have got an itch by't, which Nothing but stealing can allay; though that Can never cure it.

Ter.

Lying and stealing went Of old together: now they are shar'd it seems Between the Barber and the Taylor.

Var.

Sharp.

Ter.

Your instruments are sharp as mine, Sir Barber, And you can pick more out of your Lords ears Then I take from his Garments with my sheers.

Var.

Agree good brother, or would we had Doris To stickle twixt us.

There y'are afore me too.

Var.

But come, Lords followers are their Apes in most things, Why should not we be as friendly Rivals, now In Doris Love, as are our Lords in the Princess Eudinas. We will take up a fashion.

Enter Doris

Dor.

Varillus, where's your Lord?

Var.

I know not Doris.

Dor.

Tersulus, where's yours?

Var.

I know not Doris.

Dor.

You Eccho one another. Y'are commanded Both by the Princess and the Governess To seek'em out.

Both.

Your love commands our stay.

Dor.

Coupled together? Go yet one of you. You I can spare best.

Var.

Why him?

Dor.

You then.

Ter.

Why him?

Dor.

Do you conspire? I will return your care.

Ter.

Nay gentle Doris stay. For, tis in vain To seek our Lords. They are both rod singly forth To take the Air. Mine an hour since.

Var.

Mine even now. I came but since to call My brother Tersulus.

Dor.

Your brother Tersulus?

Ter.

As deeply vow'd in friendship as our Lords are.

Var.

It is with us as tis with them: we both Are brothers, friends; yet Rivals in your love. Can you now, as the Princess is to them, Be equally affected to us both?

Dor.

Do you stay me to abuse me.

Var.

Nay, dear Doris. We love our Lords? and as you love the Princess, Who loves them, love you us. You are Eudina, I Philocles, and he Philargus is.

Dor.

Are the men mad.

Ter.

Suppose so Gentle Doris.

Var.

The King commands you to make present choice Of one of us, or else ambitious Stratocles (That's Geron) must enjoy you. Now sweet Princess Be speedy in your choice. The kingdoms good Depends upon it. And in your Election, O make Philargus blest: He best deserves you.

Ter.

Admired friend, and brother Philocles, Your courtesie ore-comes me: I must sue, Though my heart akes the while as much for you.

Dor.

This is fine sooling— Good Barber Philocles, and Taylor Philargus, You shall not need to trim up his Affection, Nor you to stich up his with your forc'd courtesies. I know, in this, each wooes but for himself, And my Affection runs as even betwixt you, As nothing but your sizors, or your sheares Had parted.

Var.

See Stratocles, alias Geron.

Enter Geron.

Ger.

So Whilome did contend two warlike Princes For a fair ••and, till a powerful King Subdu'd them both and it. Doris, take heed, Be wary in your conversation (As Whilom Tully warn'd his tender son) With such Pl••beians, least their vulgar breeding Corrupt your education.

Var.

Must she be Your pupil learned Geron.

Ger.

And my self Her onely study; such as Whilome was; Ʋlysses to Penelope.

Var.

Take heed Doris How you become his wife: For he will love you So by the book, as he will never lie with you

Without an Authour for't.

Ger.

Sir, she shall be More precious to me then Homers Iliads, Whilome to Alexander, which he made His mighty bed-fellow: But why stand I To render this account? The Princesse sent you, Doris, to call their Lords to walk with her, And take the air of Tempe.

Ter.

They are gone to take the air already, sir.

Ger.

Come you with me then, Doris.

Dor.

And why with you Antiquity? I have heard you all this while, And though you boast you have an interest in me, We are not yet one volume, both bound up And clasp'd together.

Var.

She speaks in his Element.

Dor.

No, I am yet loose paper; and 'twere good To keep me so; for when I'm bound I must Obey, be search'd, examin'd and corrected. Yet this I'le do, and now be serious, If you will all obey my rule; and try Your fortunes who shall have me.

Var. Ter.

We agree.

Ger.

Their merits bear no aequability With mine.

Var.

A very Stratocles.

Dor.

You boast your worth, and stand on confidence In powerful advocates: But what are all Unto my Love, and (which is more) my will? If you will hear my proposition, hear it.

Var. Ter.

We are agree'd. Pray hear't.

Ger.

Lets hear it then. The Gods, in Love, Whilome have stoop'd with men.

Dor.

That you all love me, I believe; and am Content that every one of you do think

Himself prime man in my Affection: And one of you I'le take. But yet my choice Must wait upon Eudina's. Therefore mark If your Lord wins the Princesse, and becomes The Kings immediate Heir, I will be yours; If your Lord, yours.

Ger.

Therein the oddes is mine, For they are both my Lords.

Dor.

Then if both have her, I'le be yours: not else.

Ger.

As Whilome said, None of the wisest Clerks, When the Sky falls we shall have store

Dor.

Of Whilomes: Ha, ha, ha.

Var. Ter.

Ha, ha, ha.

Ger.

Your Mistresse, Lady, Princesse, and my Mother Shall know your.

Dor.

Away, old Whilome.

All.

Ha, ha, ha.

Ger.

Your Lords too I'le acquaint.

Dor.

Away, old child, Go tell it Mother, do. If you had spent, in the Phylosophers school Your time no better, then in Cupids Lectures, What a strange dunce you had been. Tell her, Love shows In you, as Whilome—she knows what she knows.

Ger.

Your Love I will forget; your scorn remember In black revenge, and so—

Dor.

Farewel December.

Var.

Hee'l to his Mother now. But tell me, Doris, What means that Beldame in she knows, she knows: She's often up with't to the Governesse.

Dor.

It has relation to some uncouth passage Betwixt them, in my Ladies youth I guesse,

Var.

Tis some smock-secret I believe. But Gentlemen, You know how I have laid my self out to you.

Ter.

That, as the Princesse shall bestow her self On eithers Lord; you will embrace his man.

Dor.

Right.

Var.

And to that you'l hold?

Dor.

Yes This for a Creed, That heaven must make its choice and hold you

Of one of them, before she take the other. You understand me; and now cease your strife: When th'ones Lord's dead, I'le be the others wife. So farewel Gentlemen. I have staid too long.

Var.

She has given us both a hint now, would we take it.

Dor.

You did not hear me say, Kill you his Lord, Nor you kill his.

Exit.

Var.

But she has laid a ground To end a strife, that I should nere ha 'found.

Ter.

Varillus, come, our Lords may be return'd: And we be shent for loytering.

Var.

I must think on't.

Exit.

ACT 4. SCENE 2.

Matho in his disguise.

Mat.

Now for my Combitants. Th'appointed ground Is here; the time draws on; and the event Foreseen in my imaginary light Of every passe projected in their fight. In the first passage, each shall wound the other; Then shall they give, lend, pay, change wound for wound, Till both of them lie fainting on the ground. Holding between their teeth their doubtful lives: When I, to end the question, friendly come in, And with an equal hand dispatcht'em both.

Ent. Philarg.

And so into my ambush. One approaches.

Exit.

Philar.

This is the place. What is't that urges me So promptly to deed, which being acted, Will be th'astonishment of Heaven and earth? Applauded no where but in Hell. Fair Tempe, Let it not be deriv'd to after Ages, By any uncouth mark upon thy face, Let not thy grassy locks, that shall receive

The drops of blood, wither and die, condemning The place that bore them to continual baldness; Let not the impress of our labouring feet Hold it's proportion; nor that part of earth, Whereon the slain shall measure out his length, Reserve the stamp, and make it monumental, By a perpetual spring of more procere And bigger bladed grass: And, when my soul Hath found an Exit (which my purpose is My Brothers sword shall open) let the valley (When hee's departed) sink and undermine The bordering hills that they may cover me.

Ent. Philoe.

Philoc.

He hath prevented me in hast: In death I shall prevent his happily expected Labour and toy'l, who for no other end Am here arriv'd but to be sacrific'd For expiation of his discontent.

Philar.

Let all the eyes of heaven be hooded, onely One star to guid his point unto my heart, Which instantly shall fall, and be extinct In my distilled blood; that so the Gods May not behold him. May some magick spell Instruct his arm and weapon how to slay My name and memory, that of me, there be not Any desire; on him no Imputation.

Philoc.

My cure is onely how my breast may swallow His point, without revealing mine intent.

Philar.

I so't shall be: a violent assay For provocation; and then spit my self Upon his steel.

They espie one another draw, and pass at each other, instantly both spread their arms to receive the wound.

Philoc.

Philargus. What! so quick,

Philar.

What's meant by this?

Philoc.

That should be my demand

Philar.

Are you so changeable?

Philoc.

Not I Philargus.

Philar.

This was my resolution; Will you stain The reputation rais'd of your high valour.

Philoc.

I came to make experiment of none But what consists in suffring.

Philar.

That's my part.

Philoc.

My self If you deny me that last friendly office.

Phila.

Brother you dally with me. Therefore I conjure you By faire Eudina let your anger loose; Break up this cask of blood, and give the earth A draught unto her health.

Philoc.

By the same Beauty (Then which no greater subject of an oath) I swear to be your nuptialls sacrifice, Be you the Priest. I'le suffer without noise In my displayed bowels you shall read An augury of bliss unto you both.

Philar.

This is hard measure, Philocles, to mock Ere you destroy.

Philoc.

I'le mock no more. Adieu.

He offers to kill himself, Philargus clos∣es with him.

Philar.

Hold, hold, and be not prodigal of that blood, More precious then Pactolus golden streams.

They strugle, and both fall down, still stri∣ving to hold each others sword. &c.

Philoc.

Was then your challenge but totry me onely?

Philar.

Yours was, it seems; but none went out from me.

Philoc.

Then are we both ensnar'd by treachery.

Enter Matho.

Math.

This I foresaw 'twould come to. 'Save ye lord∣ings. And whither travail ye? Do you not want a guide To help ye on your way?

Matho draws they start up and disarm him.

Philar.

This is the villane That summon'd me.

Philoc.

And me. Villane, what art thou?

Math.

Unhappily gues'd. I pray inquire no further.

Philar.

What monster art thou?

Philoc.

Unworthy on thy face to bear mans ensign. Who has subborn'd thee? See tis Stratocles man.

He un∣beards him.

Philar.

Die villane, die. And were thy ma∣ster in thee, The thirst of whose ambition sought our bloods; His flesh with thine should here become a prey Unto the Ravens.

Math.

O, be pitiful And spare my life, my Lords, and I'le reveal Matters of weight and wonder; which, conceal'd, Will yet cost both your lives, and make the Princess, If she not answer my Lords fierce desires, Subject to rape and murder.

Philoc.

How can she So fall into his power.

Philar.

We shall abuse The trust the Gods have put into our hands If we neglect to execute justice on thee.

Math

Let me but warn ye of Eudina's danger, Whereby her virgin Innocence may not suffer, And then inflict your furies on me.

Philoc.

That charms our ready hands and steel. Speak quickly.

Math.

This very hour she's to be surpriz'd By my Lord Stratocles, here, on Tempe plains, Where she is come to walk, slenderly guarded To take the air. He with a strength will seise her And hurry her hence unto his Mansion house, To yield to his desire, or death, if suddenly Prevention be not made.

Philar.

Tis worth our care.

Math.

Preserve me from his vengeance, and I'le bring you Unto his enterprize.

Philoc.

We must not trust him,

He may have laid an Ambuscado for us.

Enter 6 Rust. with Weapons

Philar

See brother, stand upon our guard.

Math.

Help, help, aid me good people, help.

Philoc.

What means the villan now.

1. Rus.

What's the complaint?

2. Rus.

What is your grievance, speak?

Math.

I am a servant to Lord Stratocles Who has preserv'd your Countey and your lives.

1. Rus.

We are the more beholding to him; on.

2. Rus.

'Twas more his gentlenes then our deserving; on.

Math.

These two are his malignant enemies; And finding that my Lord is in these parts Together with the Princess, fair Eudina (Who has made him her choice) they lie in wait To murder him, as they had me, had not The Gods sent you to rescue me.

1. Rus.

'Twas more their Gentleness, then your de∣serving, on.

Math.

I have no more to say, but that you take'em On your allegiance to safe custody, And let me pass.

1. Rus.

Un'ch, That would be more Our gentleness then your deserving too. on, on.

Philar.

Dear friends—

1. Rus.

Good, interrupt us not we'll hear ye in order. On you, Sir, ere you go; and come not back For any thing unspoke you left behind.

Math.

I thank you, Sir, I had like to ha'lest my sword deserving, Behind, which they disarm'd me of.

1. Rus.

That was their Gentleness more then your (They having three swords, and you none to guard you) They kill'd you not indeed, yet on again. W••••t further do you charge'em with.

Math.

No more, nor you, less you detain me longer.

1. Rus.

Now you grow bold, and saucy I must tell you.

2. Rus.

Now y'are a knave, a villane and a Traytor, Lest you no more behind you but a sword?

I saw a scabberd on your face of late, A false one: Seek it out.

3. Rus.

O here it is.

Takes up the false beard.

1. Rus.

Put it him on again. On with it, on. Resist and we will hang thee. Now my Lords, My Princess I may say: For one of you Must be our King. We know you though you know Not us; you may perhaps hereafter know us More by your Gentleness then our deserving.

Phil. Phil.

O worthy Countrey men.

1. Rus.

We are the heads of Tempe; and the chief Swain heads of Thessaly (the King has known us) And here we came to lay our heads together For good of common wealth. Here at the verge Of this adjoyning Thicket is our Bower Of consultation; and from thence (regardful Ever with eye and ear for common good) We saw a beard pull'd off; and heard that mouth, (Which now is dumb) open a plot, unlike The pittiful compl••int he made to us.

Philar.

But saw you not some passages before? Of his attempt upon our lives?

1. Rus.

Good Gods.

2. Rus.

No we came in but then. Those are enough To hang the man, and turn his Lord out of Our Countrey favour: If we find he has That plot upon the body of the Princess Of Rape and Murder. He can be no King For us: for, sirrah, we have wives and daughters.

En. Stra. Eud. Soul.

1. Rus.

Stand close. See who comes here.

Stra.

So, now go back my friends. There's some reward.

Sol.

Thanks to the noble bounteous Stratocles.

gives a pur's

Srat.

Lady your tears are bootless.

Exit Souldiers

Eud.

Help ye Gods.

Str.

Your cries as unavailable. The Gods (To whom your friendly foolish lovers Have sacrific'd each other) have given you up

To me the onely worthy of you.

Eud.

No they are both sublim'd into one star, Yet of a double influence, that shall Strike death into thy purposes, and give Me light by which t'ascend with them to live After my present death.

She offers to kill her self with a knife, he holds her.

Str.

Your hast to death shall not prevent my lust.

Philoc.

She must outlive thy Lust and the false Traytor

Rus.

Hold, hold, disarm, but kill him not.

2. Rus.

Wee'll keep him tame.

Str.

You have ods o'me.

Eud.

I am in heaven already.

Philar.

Live wonder of the heavens, a star on earth Out shining theirs.

Eud.

What a short journey 'tis For heavenly minds to reach unto the Gods!

Str.

B••tray'd!

1. Rus.

No not betray'd. Y'are but well meet my Lord, But that's our Gentlen ess more then your deserving.

Str.

Am I become the shame and scorn of pesants.

1. Rus.

Or if you'l ha't betray'd, then blame your own Overmuch policy and want of Beasts To carry it to Market. We nere lay More burthen on a Asse, then he can bear Here in the countrey: what is done at court We know not. Here perhaps is one can tell, Know you this bearded Satyre?

Pull off Ma∣thos beard.

Str.

Coward, slave, Thy faintness hath betray'd me.

Math.

No, 'twas ods, Such as men meet that sight against the Gods.

1. Rus.

The fellow has some Grace; he weeps: But come Princess and Princes, what is now your pleasure We do unto these men?

Eud.

For me, I have learn'd

By mine own sufferings in my afflictions To be compassionate. I wish their pardon.

Str.

That mercy wounds me deeper with remorse Then all my lost designs, and their derision Have done with indignation.

1. Rus.

There is some hope these yet may prove new men.

Eud.

Lord Stratocles, Those wounds that pierce the heart with true contrition Do bring the precious balm in'em that cures it.

Philar.

We wish yours may be such.

Philoc.

And that this shame May guard you innocent of future blame.

2. Rus.

Here's sweetness upon sweetness.

1. Rus.

Now it remains, that we advise our selves, Brethren of Tempe, that since these delinquents Are fallen into our hands, that we discharge Our Countrey loyalty with discretion, And not release him from our power, but by The power above us. (that's the kings) wee'l wait On you to court. On you for your new loves, And you for old acquaintance.

Eud.

I'le acquaint my father with your care, He shall be witness of our bringing in The ambitious Politick trapt in his own gin.

ACT 4. SCENE 3.

King. Disanius. Justinius.

King.

Bereft of all my joyes and hopes at once! Is there no com••ort, nor no counsel left me? Why stand you gazing thus with sealed lips? Where is your counsell now, which you are wont In trifling matters to pour out in plenty? Now, in the peril of my life and state I cannot get a word. Give me my daughter,

Or take my Kingdom too. Where is she? Tell me.

Dis.

All we can say or hear is, she was taken Out of her private walks by violent hands, Onely we guesse the master of the plot Was Stratocles, who now is missing in the Court.

King

He ask'd my leave to leave the Court, and had it.

Dis.

Twas a fit glosse for his fowl treachery.

King

But what ha' you said for her recovery.

Just.

We have dispatch't a hundred several posts To every coast and angle of your Kingdom: No way of finding her is left unsought.

Dis.

Could we finde Stratocles, she might be found.

King

Stil upon him? Where's Philocles? where's Philargus? They are missing too.

Dis▪

Hell has not in't a thought That can detract their honours.

Jus.

Yet a Rumor Is spread about the Court; they are gone to fight.

Dis.

'Gainst whom?

Jus.

Against themselves. Nay more, that they Have fought, and both are slain.

Dis.

You may as soon Believe the Artick and Antartick poles Can meet it opposition, amidst The firmament, and jointly in a fall Extinguish both their lights in Neptunes bosom.

King

Whence springs this Rumor.

Dis.

Stratocles is the head We may be confident; and his men the pipes That have dispers't it.

Kin.

Stil you judge Stratocles.

Ent. Thym. weeps.

What purpose can he have in't.

Dis.

O my sister Has heard the news too. Weep not tender sister, Your sons are safe.

Thy.

Yes they are with the Gods.

King.

And, had they tane Eudina with them too, My doubts and fears were over, well as yours.

Ent. Garr. weeping

Dis.

Here's one that makes a face, an ugly one, And would weep too, had she but moisture in her. How now! Whose Mare's dead, Garrula? Take thy bottle And turn that into tears. Or dost thou wring

Thy face because that's dry? Gi'mee't, I'le fill it.

Gar.

My son, oh, oh my son is at deaths door.

Dis.

And is death so unkind to keep it shut Against him? Out upon him churle.

Gar.

My liege And Madam (it shall out) you might have sav'd My sons life in your servants love, whose scorn Will be his death, except the King divert it, And I shall tell him what you know I know—

Thy.

O me undone.

Gar.

And open such a secret Unto his majesty—

King.

Yet forbear me now.

Gar.

Do you slight me in the care of my sons life? Do you scorn my secret too, that may be worth More then your kingdom to you?

Dis.

Away old fool.

Gar.

Now you shall never know't.

Dis.

For thy good wil The king would thank thee, in offering at some mirth To cool his grief, but that it is too hot Yet to be touch'd.

Jus.

Indeed you do not well To move the King, or to perplex the Lady Now in their sorrows fulness.

Gar.

What's their sorrow To mine? My sons a dying.

Jus.

Her sons are dead, And the Kings daughter lost.

Gar.

But I pray, say, Is my Lord Philocles and Philargus dead?

Jus.

'Tis said so.

Gar.

Then I say my son shall live.

Dis.

And so wilt thou while thou canst lift thy bottle To that old Mazer.

Gar.

Hem! A hem! a ha!

Dis.

Do you rejoyce, and shew the rotten half tooth You have left that they are dead.

Gar.

No I rejoyce That the advancement that the giglet gap'd for In one of their fine followers is lost, In hope of which she scorn'd my son. But now He shall scorn her and live.

Dis.

Out envious trot

Gar.

Ile comfort him with the newes.

Dis.

away you Hag,

Exit Gar.

Here comes one merry look.

Eup.

Joy to the king.

Enter Eupathus. Eupa.

Dis.

Well said, speak up and home good

Eup.

Your daughter's safe return'd so is your son, Madam, For which you are to thank the Gods: This is Their true relation.

He gives the King a paper.

Dis.

Where is Stratocles?

Eup.

Caught in the snares of his foul treachery.

Dis.

Bravely and honestly spoken Eupathus.

He reads to Thym. aside.

Eup.

And by their hands whose voices he had once For his election.

Dis.

What his country heads?

Eup.

They all turn head upon him now.

Dis.

Brave heads Observe my judgement now, my king: Those heads I will so souse in our best Greekish Wines, That they shall be such heads! O heads, heads, heads!

King.

I do approve your judgment good Disanius, But wish you not insult ore mans dejection. We find that Stracocles is much Penetent And troubled at his trespass.

Dis.

A halter still him For an ambitious hypocritical Traytor.

King.

The time for my Eudina's match draws near, And I no longer will attend on fortune, I have decreed it past recal, regardless Whether against the oracle, or with it.

Thy.

Yet am I consident in your assertion You priests of Delphos.

Dis.

Hee'l bestow her yet On Stratocles, if she stand longer doubtful In a fair choise.

Eup.

Fear not my Lord. That doubt Your Countrey heads will clear. He has lost them For ever.

Dis.

O brave heads! I will so ring Their ears with jewels of praises and preferment That they shall glare like direful comets at him.

King.

One she shall chuse of them: If not, I'le put A third upon her.

Thy.

With your pardon Sir, Why are you (for I find it is so) stronger For Philocles?

King.

No reason urges me; And yet I find an inclination in me That pleads for him. I can perceive you too, Are partial towards Philargus. Can you yield

A reason for't?

Thy.

Yes, Sir, he is my eldest.

King.

Alas, But not an hour. Well, I'le remit My power propounding, and accept Her choice of either, made within the time.

Thy.

I, there my hopes do anchor; else they were Certain of Ship-wrack: yet the perillous waves My vessel rides on seems so many graves.

Explicit Actus Quartus.