Bacchus bountie describing the debonaire dietie of his bountifull godhead, in the royall obseruance of his great feast of Pentecost. Necessarie to be read and marked of all, for the eschuing of like enormities. By Philip Foulface of Ale-foord, student in good felloship.

BACCHVS BOVNTIE,

Describing the debonaire dietie of his bountifull godhead, in the royall obseruance of his great feast of Pentecost.

Quint. Allicit externas praesuaui nectare gentes. Polit. —non mollia pleno Desunt vina cado.

THe groutheaded Graecians, especiallie the annointed Achiues, I meane the Bezila∣distes, those deuout doctors of Lob libers canne, these (I say) with their knightlike crue, thought it an high assumption to be as fathers in a frolicke feaste, or as base borne brothers, in bickering with the broth of bountifull Bacchus. Which coppernosed crue, the Knuckledebunions of Rome▪ so assaul∣ted with a fresh Canuazado the citie of Vinosa, that the ala∣rum of the Romans brake Nectars necke, head, and shoulders; in so much that Vesta in great outrage rushed out of a rocke, and dedicated to swéet father Bacchus as Crimson a colour as was then séene in her péereles peticote, most fragrantlie fu∣ming vp vnto Bacchus; and likewise into the nostrills of all his nosled nouises wheresoeuer.

This newfound Sacrifice in this sort offered to this bur∣sten-bellied God; lent such a swéet sent to the rest of the gods and goddesses, especially to platter-faced Iupiter, that present∣ly he appeased their furie, mitigated the afore offered iniurie,

renued Nectar to former iollitie, & sent out Mercurie as Am∣bassadour, to parle with Neptune rector of the Seas; that Triton his trustie trumpeter should sound along from shoare to shoare throughout the whole worlde the blessed bountie of Bacchus.

Mercury discharging himselfe, and Triton by commaunde∣ment of his king, tied to the aforesaid chardge, with clatte∣ring clang he thundred out such ioyfull newes, that not only mount AEtna yeelded forth fierie flames in signification of sodaine ioyes: but also Olympus merily mounted, in hope that Permessus that pleasant spring, should bée somewhat tainted with the swéet taste of so louely a liquor.

The decréed tidings of Iupiter are worde by worde in ef∣fect as followe.

PAsse Mercury to Neptunes brinish bowers, My wish, my will, in hast to him vnfolde; Let Tryton scale those hiest fleeting towers, In Bacchus praise let all his tale be tolde. Let him commaund, the Curists change their liues, In vaine striues he, with Bacchus brood which striues.

The Bacchanals hence forth shall beare the sway With help of Hypocrites they shall doe well, This gift I giue, it shall be as I say, Their forwardnes in fraies shall beare the bell. I giue them right to sweare it out with wordes, I giue them might to swash it out with swordes.

I will that these the auncient order holde, Th'order of knighthood neuer to decay: The greatest soakers shalbe least controulde, Each Tyro shall of Nectar make his pray: And whose conceipts God Bacchus deemes the best, Shall haue a rich reward aboue the rest.

Come Ganimedes, come with christall cups, Some nappie Nectar bring me here in place, Accurst be he which Nectar only sups, And turns not ouer pot by pot apace. Accurst be he which after Ceres gapes, And shunnes to sucke the sugred sappe of grapes.

In griefe liue they with carkes of cares opprest, Which leaue their liquor and away depart, Till Bacchus haue them crowned with his crest, Whose force expelles all sorrowes from the hart. With Viuat Bacchus, let the Ocean ring The same let Africk, Asia, and Europe sing.

Now Eccho, the babbling nymph at the sound of Tritō, ha∣uing intelligence hereof; resounded this decrée so mightilie towards the maine, that it easily entred into the hearing of all the inhabitants in euery hauen. And euen as at the belle∣wing of the bonnie white Bul, the ardent heates of Pasiphaë were more & more increased; in so much that one horne of his head, was more precious in her precise imagination, then all her former sacrifices dedicated as dainties to delectable Dia∣na: euen so as soone as the bruite of most bountifull Bacchus was blazed abroad, Tom Typsay, an english tapster, wel-nere choaked with a marueilous drie heat, which he of late had got by lifting ouerlong at old mother Redcaps; this Tom Typsay, I say, with a wel tried tankard trailing at his taile: the more he thought of Bacchus bountie, the more he desired to trie the experience: and the further hée laboured after his liking; the longer he lusted after his liquor: wishing at euery foote, the worthie presence of so gracious a God.

Thus Tom Typsay, not only in hope to tipple with the best, but trusting to merite a further rewarde: fell flat downe on both his maribones, holding vp his hands on hie towardes the heauens, and made his Orison to the renoumed god Bac∣chus, as hereafter followeth.

BOnny Bacchus God of wines, Cheefe maintainer of our vines, Sucker the soule, in greefe which pines, Water to drinke, I hold not good, Thy iuice oh Bacchus breeds best blood. Nectar (good Bacchus) Nectar send, Braue Bacchus doe thy bounty lend: Vnto Tom Typsay stand a frend, And so thy fame shall neuer ende. Nectar, sweet Nectar, is my wish, Behold my tankard, and my dish, As for my plate I haue it solde, And for pure broath my money tolde; Yet once againe let me beholde, Euery morning warme or colde, Nappie liquor stout and bolde Commended and boasted In a pot trimly toasted, The pots feet finely roasted In a worthie fire. And first of all for my part, To besiege and sacke the quarte Till it warme me well at hart, And then doe it feele Sincke downe into my heele: And so next to take the paines To passe vpward through the vaines, And soake withall into these braines, Which witles now alas remaines For want of good liquor.

Scarse had he ended this his petitory prattle, but Bacchus as willing to lend him a long eare to heare, as hée to open a wide mouth to aske: and as desirous to fetch him in for a foot man, as to turne him off his trusse, & as ready to féed him as fat as a foole, as to teach him the tricke to shue the go••se: pre∣sently

he roused vp his moysty head, and from a muddie mufe so cléered vp his cherilike countenance, that the maiestie of his nose séemed as the beames of the sunne shining along throughout the coastes of Archadie. But missing the sight of him whom he lately heard, forthwith he tumbled vpon his tunne, and standing bolt vpright, through the merueilous in∣fluence which to him was imparted by Euriopazeus; he saw Tom Tipsay in an excéeding quandary, in so much that Bac∣chus for very pittie, through the might of his deitie, so curi∣ously soared through the airie region, that in a moment he de∣scried this perplexed Tapster, and drawing nere him, he hail∣std him after this maner.

Whereas (my friend) thy groanes are so great and grie∣uous, that they haue ascended the hiest cloudes, which cry out in thy behalfe for my accustomed clemency, and pierced with∣all into my bountifull tunne, which now troubled with the sharpnes of thy spéech, threates out a danger to her former swauitie: behold Bacchus, Bacchus I say, thy best beloued god, ready prest to performe what thou art willing to demaunde.

Say on therefore boldly and feare not: and withall know this, that Bacchus hath not only a care to kéepe his clients in safety, but great cause (no doubt) to preserue them in felicity: for who is he that hath euer heard, much lesse séene, that any of the gods, at any time so tendred the welfare of their suppli∣ants, as from age to age, both dayly and hourely béen séene in me. The tyrannie of Iupiter is testified by his threatning thunderbolte: the malice of Mars is expressed by his bloody blade. The outrage of Pallas is dissembled by the booke; but euidently perceiued by the piercing launce. The broyles of Pan are performed by the crooke. The furie of Syluanus is knowne by the Clubbe: the dismall decrées of Diana are no∣ted by her dartes, and to be briefe, all the other gods and god∣desses, Hercules like are cloyed with such cholericke clubbs; that their mouthes taste nothing sauing wordes of wrath, and their déeds séeme vndecent, vnlesse they smel of reuenge.

But Bacchus that braue god, whom thou séest here present,

abhorreth that his wightes should bee wearied with the waight of such vnweildie weapons. No, no, I beare (as thou maiest sée) a beautifull braunch of goodly grapes in token of ioy & gladnes: whereas the terrour of other gods, to the griefe of many, doth prognosticate sorrow and sadnes.

Now therefore Tapster, if thou wilt be as readie to make trial of my bountie, as I willing to inuite thée to my banquet; beholde, Whilson-wéeke is néere at hand, then are my feasts called Bacchanalia; then resort together the whole band of Bacchus in their chiefest brauerie, amongst whome (if it so please thée) thou shalt be entertained as a guest most welcom to Bacchus.

Tom Typsay hearing so courteous a discourse, as a man marueilously amazed for ioy, stood a long time staring in Bac∣chus face, not able poore soule (as then) to make a reply. But Bacchus, a perfect phisitian willing to preserue his patient in so pitifull a plight, reuiued his spirites with the swéet moy∣sture of his tunne, and refreshed his braines with the iuice of his grapes. Hereat Tom Typsay awaking as it were from a drousie slumber, yéelded to his god Bacchus a tub full of thankes, and promised at the time appointed to bée there with the first. Yet because hée knew not the place, hée deman∣ded of him thus.

Sith your worships godhead hath vouchsafed to com∣maund my companie to so famous a feast; let it not dis∣please your maiestie to put mee in memorie of the place: else by the masse, I promise you, I feare mée, I shall ne∣uer finde out your honours house; I pray you sir how do you call it?

To resolue this doubt (quoth Bacchus) vnderstand there∣fore, that my mansion house is called Alepotto, scituate on the south side of Quaffington, enquire for mée at the signe of the scarlet nose, and from thence shalt thou bée set aright into Beerebury lane, so that being there, thou canst not misse to finde out my palace, for thou shalt plainely sée it before thine eyes.

Hereat Tom Typsay made a long legge, vowing to bée there without faile, and Bacchus willing to dismisse him, blessed the Tapsters tankard with part of his bountie, and thereupon departed.

Thus the Tapster in great haste hies him home as mery as any hare in the moneth of March. For whereas before this so comfortable a conference, hée was so lazie, that e∣uery foote séemed to haue a leaden héele: euerie legge in such a quandarie, as though they had tooke some new ac∣quaintance with the goute; yea his very head so heauie, as if it had béene harnessed in an horse-nightcap: and his whole bodie so distempered, as though he had beene prickt to the very heart with a belclapper: beholde, nowe the case is altred, and hée is altogether become another man: for now is hée as nimble as a dogs taile, as couragious as a butterflie, and as merrie at the heart, as the best paire of bagpipes in all the countrey.

But as times are altred, so diuers accidents are infer∣red. Happie was Midas when it was graunted vnto him, that all which hée touched should bée golde: but soone haples againe, when his meate was metamorphosed into metall, and hée with his wish ready to starue. Glad was Acteon at the sight of Diana, when shee bathed her selfe amongst her nimphes: but luckles was his lot, when shortly after hée became himselfe a present pray to bée de∣uoured of his owne dogs. And ioyfull was Tom Typsay in remembraunce of the bountie of his god Bacchus, but sor∣rowfull alas at his returne when first hée came within the viewe of his wife: for shée (as is the manner of all headie huswiues, whose tongues are more readie to raue, than their hands to worke) not sticking one iot to teache him a new lesson, tooke him roundly by the topping, and welcomed him home after this manner.

Ah ah sirra, I sée by Astronomie that the Moone is euen now at full, and the signe setled iust in the nose: in so

much that (as by all mathematicall probabilities I doe con∣iecture) backe and bellie may this yeare both goe bare, so that there be no want of harnes for the head. Well, well I néed not to tel thée what thou art, the gilding of thy nose suf∣ficiently bewraies thy good behauiour. In so much that either Luna hath come downe alone, and in taking thée for her olde Endimion, hath made thée her newe Moone face: or (as thy tottering too and fro doth plainely testifie) thou hast had some long tariance at Simon Soakers house, the coppernose smith, your euer assured friend. But one thing assure thée, for so am I certainely perswaded, that as the diuell hath already dub∣bed thée for a drunkard: so hereafter, one time or other, but neuer too late, Don Tyburne will inuite thée to a liueles feast, and teach thée the crosse caper in an halfepennie halter. And thus in a fustian fume flung away.

If true it be, as many report, that a curst queanes tongue is as sharpe as a razor: experience then proueth, that this poore shaueling néeded no better a barber. How euer it be, I will referre it to their rehearsall, which haue had their crownes smoothed as well with a crabtrée combe, as those which haue tried the sharpnes of the sisers.

But euen as the clap of the thunder the greater it is, the sooner it ceaseth: and the blastes of Boreas the more furious they are, the lesse while is their continuance: so likewise, a womans mouth the more full it is of wordes, the lesse it is of force, and sooner it wasteth into winde. The falling out of louers is the renuing of loue, and the bitternes of the tongue is easely seasoned with the swéetnes of the lippes: for what with pleasing spéeches, swéete conceipts, the clinking of the pot, and the drinking of new Nectar, these two swéete soules became both as one, and the heate of their former furies were frozen vp as it were into a lake of euerlasting loue.

Thus whiles this couple continued in solacing themselues to their hearts content, behold Whitsontide drew on: and to be briefe, away they both doe walke to the banquet, but be∣cause these guestes were wrapped vp in their chiefest roabes;

it wil not be a misse to describe them in their chéefest brauery, as they passed along on their iorney.

THe Tapsters hat was all in blew: Beseeming well his nut-browne hiew: His nose was ruddy as I weene And bending as the Faucons beene. His thin-set heire along did sit Which represents a woodcocks wit, Yet bald withall was Tipsay found With eares side hanging like a hound. His eyes were fiery on each side His mouth was open gaping wide, His lippes great as cable rope, His teeth white as washt in sope. A bristled beard did flower his cheekes, His breath was sweete as vnset leekes. Vpon his chinne a wart did grow Bacchus thereby might well him know. About his neck he wore a ruffe A quarter long, which was enuffe. His iacket gray, well fac'd with furre, His voyce was like a barking curre. His shoulders did like horseloues stand, As pillers to vphold his band. His back was ridged like a boare, His belly like a tunne before. There hangs a tap betweene his legs From whence he turneth foorth his dregs. On either hand was placde a cuffe, And brauely was he breecht in buffe. His leggs they were so crooked seene A yoked hog might run betweene. One foot was of the largest sice The other clubbed crabtree wise.

And here described is the guest Which Bacchus bad vnto his feast.

Now as concerning the costly attire of the Tapsters wise, because I am in hast at this time, I am rather willing to slip ouer so cumbersome a matter with filence, than to trouble i∣dle heads with matters of so great importaunce.

As they thus traueled togeather, at length they obteined their long desired hauen, and entered into the Pallace of god Bacchus, where they were, so worthilie entertayned, that the sunne in his midday spheare shining out most bright∣lie, doth scarce halfe represent such glorie, as was by report séene in this feast. For whereas commonly now a daies, wée either inuite them of our acquaintance, or such whose new-found friendship may be as meanes to cure olde soares: this mightie god Bacchus, to the wonder of the worlde, inuiteth not onely such as bée his familiars, but men altogether vn∣knowne, as well the poore as the rich.

Sée then the goodnes of this so gracious a god, al yée, which in the driest drought of summer had rather shroude your throates with a handfull of hemp, then with the expence of an odde Crinclepouch wash your selues within and without, and make your selues as mery as dawes: yea learne yée nig∣gards at god Bacchus to bée liuely; whose especiall fauour spreads out it selfe so far, that euery nation doth magnifie his name, euery countrey speakes in his commendation and all people paint him out with pen and pensill, in so much that Iu∣piter himselfe doth wonder at his worthines.

But to returne from whence I came, their entertainment I say was such, that they rather thought themselues trans∣ported into Paradice that place of pleasure, then remayning in any earthly habitation: for there they saw a royal resort as well of all lands and languages, as of all degrées and callings whatsoeuer.

There was Ganimedes sent from Iupiter, to imploy his ser∣uice at Bacchus table, there was halting Hebe sent by Iuno to

furnish this feast with all solemnitie. There was Sylenus, a stately seruitour, waiting at euery winke, & preuenting euery want. Yea such was the bounty of Bacchus, that he sent downe to Plutus prince of hell, and craued the company of diuers his acquaintance, which Plutus performed accordingly.

Thither rode great Alexander vpō the back of prauncing Bu∣cephalus, brauely accōpanied with Sardanapalus king of Assiria, quéene Semiramis and Ninus her sonne, first founders of Babilō.

After these came Claudius Tiberius, the Romaine Emperour, who for the zeale hée had to the vintrée, was merely termed Caldius Biberius mero: with him came Caligula, Nero, and Helio∣gabalus, Anthonie, Cleopatra, and such like.

After these againe came stumbling in blind Homer the greci∣an poet, and with him came Aristophanes, Menander, & others: and along with these came Virgill, Horace, Ouid, olde father En∣nius, Geffery Chaucer, Lydgate, Anthony Skelton, Will. Elderton▪ with infinite mo, whose seuerall names to rehearse, were no les labour then to make a mouse to pisse ouer Poules, or a louse to leap ouer the high tops of Maluerne hills.

Moreouer after these came young Cicero, who for the large loose that he had in turning downe his liquor, was called Bicon∣gius; with him came the blockheaded Balatronus, and Vibidius, Mecenas trencher-mates: & that old huddle and twang Aristo∣demus, the shadow of Saint Socrates.

And Proserpina the infernall quéene, willing to honour Bac∣chus in what she might, releaseth Tantalus from out of the riuer, causeth Sysiphus to cease from his tumbling taske, sets Ixion frée from his torture: cals downe Prometheus, and compels the vul∣tures, deuouring his heart, to cease from their pray, and for the tune only that Bacchus feast continueth, she doth licence them al to depart.

Glad were they to be released tho but for a time, and glad was Bacchus that it was his lot to welcome such willing guestes.

As Bacchus was thus most busie amongst his friends, behold a reuerend route resorted towardst his court with a trumpet before them sounding most melodiously in token of great ioy, for that they were so nere the pleasant paradice of god Bacchus.

Who they were, from whence they came, and in what manner they appeared in presence, followeth as thus.

First of all came Dauid Drie-throte, from Lesbona in Portu∣gale; in his hand hee held a peece well fild with wine of Canary, which with cap and knee hee presented to god Bacchus, and gaue place to the rest.

Secondly, came Alexander Addlehead, from Dun Baur, a Scot, who offered to his god a dozen of red herrings to season his mouth before he sat downe to taste his liquor.

Thirdly, there skipt in a Spaniard, of the city of Logronio, na∣med Blayner Bloblip, who gratifying his god with two limons, & an orenge pill, with a most lowly legge he lept aside.

Fourthly, came wallowing in a Germane, borne in Mentz, his name was Gotfrey Grouthead; with him he brought a wallet full of woodcocks heads, the braines thereof tempered with other sauce, is a passing preseruatiue against the ale-passion or paine in the pate.

Fiftly, came posting in one Peers Spendall from Brundusium, an Italian frier, with a pot full of holy water, sprinkling to and fro, and round about him, to driue away the diuell, least hee should chance to come inuisible and deceaue them of their drinke.

The 6. was one Frauncis Franckfellow, a Corinthian in the the coasts of Achaia, with him he brought a box of oyle, that Bac∣chus therewith might baste his belly, when it was ready to crack, with licking vp ouer lauishly the small crums that tumbled out of his tunne.

The seuenth was one Simon Swil-kan, he came from Colops a citie in Africa, and presented to Bacchus a buttock of Bacon: which broyled on the coales, and so eaten, will set a man on longing for his liquor before sunne shine, bee the morning neuer so moysty.

The eight was of Capsa, a towne well knowne in Numidia: his name was Geffery Gooscap, and with him hee brought a night cap for god Bacchus great godhead, least through his hot compotations in the day, his head should crow with cold consump∣tions in the night.

The 9. was a iolly gentlewoman, named mistris Merigodown;

she came from Archelais, a citie in Cappadocia, with a fanne of fe∣thers in one hand, and a looking glasse in the other: which both she gaue to Bacchus: the one to gather winde, least his breath shoulde faile him when he blew a long blast in a wine pot: the other to see to his nose, least continuing ouerlong in a fierie colour, it shoulde chance to be changed into a Carbuncle.

The 10. was one Phillip Filpot, brought vp in Varica a citie of Iberia, and one of the sect of Saint Sinckator. This Philip was a phisition, and brought to his god Bacchus a certaine potion, merueilous in operation, of which who euer he were that did drinke after hee had beene well whitled, by vertue thereof, if hee once were a sleepe, shoulde neuer awake till hee were wiser.

The 11. was a Iewe borne in Ioppa, hee had to name Chri∣stopher Crabface, a man famous in Astrologie: hee brought in his hand a Prognostication newly composed, which hee besto∣wed on god Bacchus. In which booke hee had largly set down diuers detriments accidentall this yeare: Especially this I no∣ted, that many drunkards whiles they looked vpwards on high towards the man in the Moone, shall breake their necks down∣wards below in the bottome of a ditch.

The 12. was Gilbert Goodfellow, from Arbila, an Assyri∣an: this Gilbert was a butcher, and brought with him an hoggs head, a sheepes tongue, and a calues chauldron; the hogs head for harnesse against entreatie: the sheepes tongue to temper his owne the better in telling of a true tale, and a calues chauldron to wrap vp his noddle, least in the ende of a banquet his inward heate should fume out with a farewell to all good felowship.

The 13. came from Choka a citie in Arabia, named Nicho∣las Neuerthriue; hee brought with him a pudding pie, pretilie powdred with such hot spices as his countrie plentifully dooth afforde: which beeing once tasted, dooth maruellously en∣crease a moystie appetite, which Bacchus receaued very thank∣fully.

The 14. was called Hodge Heauie-breech, hee came frome Miserga a cittie in the confines of Persia: Hodge by his

occupation was a Cardmaker, who for the zeale he had to god Bac∣chus and al good fellows, offered vp to him that renowmed ruffler the knaue of Clubs, with a box of trim trillilles, commonly called the dice: the one to aide him in a needeles combat, the other after his losse, to serue him in stead of recreation.

The 15. was one Maudlen Moonface, a mery gentlewoman of Dublin, a citie in Ireland: with her she brought a glasse ful, nose high of Aquauitae, the operation where of is no lesse monstrous than m••rueilous, for being drunke in a morning it so warmeth the heart, as if the body were in a bath, whose inward heats whē they begin to budforth, transforme themselues into gosbery grapes to be seene most plainely as vnder a vizard of glistering glasse.

The 16. was a pleasant Parthian of the stately cittie Catompy∣lon, called Loblurchall; this youth was a feate fellow, and a fine faulkner, with him he carried a water Wagtaile, readie to flie at the fairest goofe in Winchester: which present god Bacchus accepted very gratefully.

The 17. was borne in India, at a faire citie called Tyndis, this forsooth was a coy dame, called Cate Crashpot, she came clincking a quart pot for sweete musicke, in stead of the ta••••ret, to which ma∣ner of melodie god Bacchus listned exceedingly.

The 18. was one Baudwin Barrelbely from Ormusa, a place sufficiently knowne in the ile of Cyprusse, with him he brought a firkin full of wine of Basterdes: assuring god Bacchus on his fideli∣tie, that so many as he made thereof partakers with him, as long as they applied themselues to the harty carouse, should neuer be daunted by death, and faile footing.

The 19. came from Garma in Aethiopia, called Goody Good∣ale: shee (in token of pure deuotion) deliuered to Bacchus a ••ack full of groute, and a sack-full of hops, standing stoutly in this opi∣nion, that the barly broath aboue all other did beare away••th bell, and that neither grape nor very might in any respect be compared to the maiestie of the mault.

The 20. was a worthie yeoman, one Tom Tospot, he came from Friburgum an Heluetian, he as willing to pleasure himselfe, as to honour his god, presented to Bacchus, a dainty deuised compound, of sundry simples pastiewise, as the trimming of tripes, the fat of

chitterlings, and the marrow of swéet souse, lapt vp altogether within the crusty walls of paste royall, in so much that a world of be••ly cheere was contained therein, which god Bacchus receaued with so great thankes, that he promised to honour the eating there∣of, with the best increments of his ouer-flawing tunne.

When these had ended their deuotion, they were placed all in order, and vsed as most welcome guests: busie was Bacchus in vtte∣ring his bounty, and the rest of the seruitors no l••sse diligent, so that no man wanted his wish, nor depriued of his will.

Scarse had they tipled gyrum wise, as commonly the sect of the Surratims vse to doe, as only of triall to wet their whistles: but in comes Bat Barlycap, a mery musitian, ready with cap and knee to giue them a song: which proffer god Bacchus accepted gladly; wherupon M. Barlicap tempered vp his fidle, & begā as followeth.

THe Gods of loue Which raigne aboue Maintaine this feast: Let Bacchus find Their hearts most kind To euery guest. And long may Bacchus braue it here in pleasures to abound, That wine & beere, & belly gut cheere, with plenty here be found.

I pray likewise, That ere you rise You drink your fill, That no man want Nor finde it skant Whereof to swill. Then may you all carouse in blisse, and bid farewell to woe, Who liues in this, he cannot misse but straight to heauen goe.

Be mery all Both great and small Be mery here, And with your liquor Sweetly bicker, Doe not feare. Wash wel your throates which now are dry, and spare not you for cost, I tell you true, no shot is due where Bacchus rules the rost.

Sadnes and griefe Bring no reliefe, Bid them adiew: In paine none pine Which loue strong wine I tell you true. Then learne to laffe, carouse & quaffe, and spare not while you may. Hey dery dery, my masters be mery, and looke for a ioyfull day.

This song thus ended, the whole hall for ioy did ring out a loud laffing peale, and thanked the fidler for his mirth. Bacchus made him drinke, Silenus bad him not spare, so Barlicap did drink till his eyes did stare.

Thus euery man falls to his taske, and hee happie that is able

to stand stoutly in the forefront, to giue the brauest onset.

Whiles thus they tipled, the fidler he fidled, and the pots dan∣ced for ioy the old hop about, commonly called Sellengars round: euery man set to his foot, there was not whip snatch and away, but plaine rack and manger, where euery one dranke himselfe out of danger: cups and cans went clip clap, the guests were al welcome, their tongues ran at randome, sir Prattle kept a wrangling, and dame Tattle a great iangling, each one was mery, & no man wan∣ted words to solace his next neighbour: to be briefe, heauen was here, and hell where they were not, yea who but the guests of god Bacchus.

Amids these only pleasures, and ioyes incomparable, Iupiter sends downe Mercury to make them pleasant: & Venus the queene of loue, sent also her son Cupid to creep in amongst thē for kindnes, and to lead them along blindfold vnto lust & loathsome self-liking.

Then Pluto the master diuell of hell seeing fit opportunity and place conuenient, sent amongst the ioyfull guests of this feast, the furies of hell, who with all speed posted to god Bacchus pallace, to exercise their hellish outrage.

Now Cupid lingred not out his time, but did driue his dartes amongst thē with such force, that some for pure loue wedded them selues to wine: some became sworne brethren to the beere pot, o∣ther some matched themselues only to Metheglin, one liked this, another that, all was wonderfull to behold.

Bawdwin Barrelbelly was greatly grieued with loue gripes, especially through the desire hee had to goody Goodale the AEthiopian.

Kit Crabface so ardently burned in the loue of Maudlin Moone∣face, that well nere he burned himselfe to ashes.

Mercury he cast his eloquence amongst them by horse loades at once, so that large promises with no performance, were as easie to be heard, as small bells in a morrice daunce.

Medusa, Megera and the rest of those furious hags, flie al at once in amongst them, and sets their teeth on edge to practise villanie, one against another: one puls his felow by the beard without cause; another crackes his next felowes crowne with a quart pot, one flings a glasse in another mans face, another makes a buckler of

his hat to saue himselfe before, whiles another with a black iack breakes his head behinde: one cries downe with him, downe with him, not able of himselfe to kill a louse, another lies lurking vn∣der the table altogether speechles.

Here Dauid Drithroat gathered vp his teeth, which Pierse Spendall the Frier had lately strooke out, because Dauid like an vnmannerly knaue, presumed to pisse in the holy water pot.

There Gotfrey Grouthead begins to fume, and fometh at the mouth like a sauage bore, hee falls at variance with mistris Meri∣godowne, and hales her along by the haire of the haead: in so much that (thou knaue) was as common amongst them as cartway, or probo in the schooles: and (thou whore) as vsuall a terme, as hait hary in the mouth of a carter.

Whiles thus they lay on heapes, one on the neck of another, some spurning others w^t their heeles, some scratching their heads where they itched not, some sprauling vnderneath most glad to rise vp againe, some wiping the blood away from their faces: some rubbing their shinnes which they burst on the frames: some gaping for winde, almost choked with flies, while these, I say, did lie in this so great disorder, the gods aboue were constrained to winke at their follies, and the diuels below reioyced at the viewe of this our mortall wretchednes.

Thus Bacchus arose, with the rest of his Barons, and dismis∣sed euery man very bountifully: who after long stumbling, at the last returned from whence they came. And Bacchus himselfe reti∣red to Archadie, whereat this day, for his singular liberali∣tie, & bounteous behauiour towardes all inhabitants trauellers & passengers, he is of power to make a greater companie of able men then any man of his degree.

Et largas epulas & bona vina dedit.

FINIS.