Familiar letters: vol. I. Written by the Right Honourable, John, late Earl of Rochester, to the honourable Henry Savile, esq; and other letters by persons of honour and quality. With letters written by the most ingenious Mr. Tho. Otway, and Mrs. K. Philips. Publish'd from their original copies. With modern letters by Tho. Cheek, Esq; Mr. Dennis, and Mr. Brown.

A Consolatory Letter to an Essex-Divine upon the Death of his Wife.

OLD FRIEND,

A Gentleman, that lives in your Neighbourhood, told me this Morning, after we had had some short Discourse about you, that you have buri∣ed your Wife. You and I, Doctor, knew one another, I think, pretty well at the College; but being absolutely a stranger to your Wife's Person and Character, the Old Gentleman in Black take me, if I know how to behave my self upon this occasion; that is to say, whether to be Sad or Merry; whether to Condole, or Congratulate you. But, since I must do one or t'other, I think it best to go o•• the surer side; And so, Doctor, I give you Joy of your late great Deliverance. You'll ask me, perhaps, why I chose this Par∣ty? To which I shall only reply, That your Wife was a Woman, and 'tis an hundred to one that I have hit on the

right. But if this won't suffice, I have Argument to make use of, that you can no more answer, than you can consute Bellarmine. I don't mean the Popish Car∣dinal of that Name, (for, I believe, you have oftner laid him upon his Back, than Mrs. Mary, deceased) but an ungodly Vessel holding about six Gallons, which, in some Parts of England, goes by ano∣ther Name (the more's the pity 'tis suf∣fer'd) and is call'd, a Ieroboam. — And thus I urge it. — Mrs. Mary, de∣funct, was either a very good, or a ve∣ry bad, or an indifferent, a between Hawk and Buzzard Wife; tho' you know the Primitive Christians, for the four first Ages of the Church, were all of Opinion, that there were no indiffe∣rent Wives•• however, disputandi gratia, I allow them here. Now, if she was a good Wife, she's certainly gone to a ••etter place; and then St. Ierome, and St. Austin, and St. Ambrose, and St. Ba∣sil, and, in short, a whole Cart-load of Greek and Latin Fathers (whom 'tis not your Interest, by any means, to disoblige) say positively, That you ought not to grieve. If she was a bad one, your Rea∣son will suggest the same to you, with∣out

going to Councils and Schoolmen. So now it only remains upon my hands to prove, that you ought not to be concern'd for her Death, if she was an indifferent Wife; and Publick Authority having not thought fit as yet, to oblige us to mourn for Wives of that denomination, it follows, by the Doctrin of the Church of England, about things indifferent, that you had better let it alone, for fear of giving Scandal to weak Brethren.

Therefore, Doctor, if you'll take my Advice, in the first place, Pluck up a good Heart; secondly, Smoak your Pipe, as you used to do; thirdly, Read mode∣rately; fourthly, Drink plentifully; fifthly and lastly, When you are distri∣buting Spoon-meat to the People next Sunday from your Pulpit, cast me a Hawk's Eye round your Congregation, and, if you can, spy out a Farmer's Daugh∣ter plump and juicy, one that's likely to be a good Breeder, and whose Father is of some Authority in the Parish, (be∣cause that may be necessary for the Sup∣port of Holy Church) say no more, but pelt her with Letters, Hymns and Spiri∣tual Sonnets, till you have gain'd your

Carnal Poi••t of her. Follow this Coun∣sel, and I'll engage your late Wife will rise no more in your Stomach; for, by the unerring Rules of Kitchin-Physick, which, I am apt to think, is the best in all cases, one Shoulder of Mutton serves best to drive down another. I am

Yours, T. BROWN.