Page 43
Scene 5.
Pray Mistriss Reformer, be Sir Humphry Bold's friend to thy Lady, and I protest to thee, he shall be thy friend, as long as he and you live, and I do not see any reason your Lady should refuse him; for he is both as proper and stout a man, as any is living this day in the Land.
Indeed Madam, I dare not mention it to my Lady, for she is so adverse against marriage, as she takes those for her enemies as doth but men∣tion it.
Then surely she is not a woman, for there is none of the ef∣seminate Sex, but takes it for a disgrace to live an old maid, and rather than dye one, they will marry any man that will have them; and the very fear of not marrying, is so terrible to them, as whilst they are so young, as they are not fit to make wives, they will miserably cast away themselves to the first that makes a proffer, although they be poor, base or mean, rather than venture to try out their fortunes.
But my Lady is not of that humour.
Come, come, I know thou canst perswade thy Lady if thou wouldst, and if you will, Sir Humphry Bold will give thee 500 l. to buy thee a Husband, for thou hast lived too long a maid I faith.
I am not a maid, Madam, I am a widow.
What, a musty widow!
I know not whether I am musty, but I am a widow.
Let mee tell thee, that it is as great a disgrace to live a wi∣dow, as an old maid; wherefore take thee 500 l. to get thee a second Hus∣band.
Truly I would not sell my Lady for all the World, much less, for 500 l. neither would I marry again, if I were young, and might have my choyce.
Lord bless me, and send me out of this house, least it should infect me; for let me tell thee, were my Husband dead to morrow, I would marry the day after his Funeral, if I could get any man to marry me, and so I would serve 20. Husbands one after another.
Your best way were to have 20. Husbands at one time, so that your Ladyship might not be a day without.
O fie! If women might have twenty Husbands, they would have no room for courtly Servants; but prithy help Sir Humphry Bold, and take his offer, and let me speak with the Lady my self.
That your Ladyship cannot at this time, for my Lady is not well.
Then pray remember my most humble service, and tell her, I will come to morrow, and if she be sick, I will talk her well.
Dead you would talk her, for thou hast an endless tongue; Oh! what man is so miserable that is her Husband.