The private Christian's witness for Christianity to the notional and erroneous apprehensions of the Arminian, Socinian, and Deist of the age : with the easy and true means leading the prophane, meer professor, and lazy Christian, to the same experience, as preservative against the infection of each, and against the ill example of the practical blemishes in lazy Christians conversation.

Experiences of God's Method in training me to the Knowledge of right participating the Lord's Supper.

PRevious to which, let me premise my Opi∣nion thereof, and Practice then while only under the Notional Knowledge of Chri∣stianity and the Power of Education, and that in the following Parts.

First, That by the strength of Education I believ'd the Sacrament an extraordinary Ordi∣nance, solemnly to be gone about, and extra∣ordinarily to be prepared for; wonderful Com∣munion with God being there to be enjoy'd, of which I never then had felt any Experience, tho' I had once partaken of it with all seri∣ousness, by the instruction and example of others, and my own Thoughts of the solemni∣ty of that Ordinance, but without any other seriousness than what is wrought by a Mini∣ster's affecting Discourse, and delivery of an affecting Subject; but spiritual Communion with Christ, without which, Sacrament Com∣munion is unprofitable, and the discovery of God's love to the Soul, which Holy Ministers have spoke of as more valuable than all the World; all this was Mystery to me, and not desired; but now, blessed be his Name, has been Reveal'd, and Experimented in my Soul by the means of Grace.

Secondly, When I felt an inward change in my Soul, and I had clearer knowledge of the Nature and End of that Ordinance, my inten∣tion and manner of performance was Spiritual, and the Benefits concomitant and consequent with that Ordinance were enjoy'd. It's true, that Prayer was the first Duty wherein I felt a serious hearty delight, and understood fel∣lowship with God; but gradually I advanc'd to the Experience of the same delight and heaven∣liness of frame in other Duties, and amongst the rest, in that Duty of the Sacrament, but without that high flight of Joy as sometimes I have had in Prayer; but I still imagin'd, that though I had not attain'd its experience so much in that Duty, yet it was to be enjoy'd therein, and that God would please in due time to give me the Sense thereof.

Thirdly, That no sooner I had the Sense of this inward change, but as soon my judg∣ment was clear, as to the repetition of this Du∣ty of the Sacrament; for before, neither the Reading of the Institution, nor Ministers preach∣ing thereupon, were so powerful as to induce me to its often performance, which frequency I once imagin'd Sinful, or at least the occasion of leading to a careless Sinful performance thereof: Satan like an Angel of light, disturb'd my tender Conscience with this Argument a∣gainst frequent Communion, That I was not

to partake of the Lord's Table without a Week's solemn Preparation; but I was more instructed concerning my Duty, by my own Call after∣ward; for once being in great Affliction both inward and outward, I resolved to go to the Lord's Supper, imagining it a season in which I could best be serious, and thereby better pre∣par'd than when the pressure of the Affliction was over: And if there were any such thing to be experienc'd as the great Comforts the Saints declar'd, I might then probably feel them; and accordingly did partake with greater Gravity and inward Thoughtfulness than otherwise I should have been able to do; but I did not feel those raised Affections, nor that inward Fellow∣ship with God, or ravishing Joy that I did ex∣pect; which disappointment greatly concern'd me, Satan forcing home upon me this sug∣gestion, of its being an Evidence how unpre∣par'd I was, and what an unacceptable Sacri∣fice I offered to God; which made me consult a spiritual Friend, whose Sincerity and Judg∣ment I had in very high value: His Answer was, The Spirit of God is not to be limited; God's ways of imparting himself is not confin'd to the time of Partaking this Ordinance, but you may judge of your right Performance by your frame before and after, as well as in the Duty. This greatly reviv'd me, and was a mean of quieting me, and of keeping me in the frequent Participation of the Ordinance; the Truth of his Words I have found by many Experiences.

Fourthly, I have sometimes found great heavenliness of frame before the Partaking of the Ordinance, and sometimes after it, even when in the time of the Duty I have been cold∣ly affected, and without sensible Comfort; Upon hearing my complaint, my Friend re∣ply'd, Though God in training you to the knowledge of himself and his ways, has dealt with you as a darling Child, with wonderful smiling providences, think it not strange if ha∣ving obtain'd his end of working Faith of Re∣liance, he change his Method, and tries the Grace he has wrought in your Soul.

Fifthly, In the mean time this Blessed Saint being at a distance from me, I often pray'd, O that I had fellowship with God in this Ordi∣nance, that I might feel therein what others do, or what I have felt in other Duties, I should be satisfied if I should never enjoy it there again; unbelief still working in me. It pleased God in his wonderful Condescention to comply with this desire, and thereby to discover the greatness of my weakness, as well as the ad∣vantage of Reliance upon God in the use of means, without limiting him to our desires; for in the participating of the next Sacrament, I was admitted to such a sweet ravishing En∣joyment that I never had before Experienc'd in that Duty, which persuaded me of the Truth of what I have often heard; but such a dis∣quieting darkness was consequent both in my

Mind and outward Affairs, that I by the rich Mercy and Power of God was then help'd, sweetly to resign my desire to his Will, and to supplicate for his influences, as he pleased to dispense them, never limiting God to things or times further than as suitable to his Omni∣scient Will; by this Experience I was helpt in all my concerns, less as well as greater, to cast them at Heaven's Gate, to hope in his Mercy for them, with this desire only, that I might by the Spirit of Grace and Supplication, be assisted to make known my Requests to God with Faith and Resignation, so as to be ac∣cepted of him; and in this I find my Hearts Ease.

I have since esteem'd it Duty, and had ar∣dent Desire of Partaking the Lord's Supper every Month. While my Religion was merely from Education, I thought once in a year or two enough, to partake of this Ordinance, but since my regard to my Sovereign's and Savi∣our's Command, Do this in remembrance of me, and my performance in Obedience to this Com∣mand, I have enjoy'd ravishing sweetness in Communion with Christ in this Duty: And I shall add, That the frequent repeating of this Ordinance is attended with great advantage; for by Preparatory Examination, I am more fully acquainted with my Spiritual State, with my present Corruptions and Graces stron∣ger or weaker, and the way how God makes this Duty a mean to suppress the one, and raise

the other, with my Defects in the performance of this Duty; and I have a fuller sight of Christ in all-sufficient merits in his Treasures of Grace that are open'd to all that come with Holy Af∣fections to him. The serious and frequent re∣newing our Covenant with Christ in this Ordi∣nance, will endear him to us, and engage us to live to him who died for us; and the warm im∣pression of his love will be maintain'd in our Souls, which is too apt to cool and decline, un∣less fed and reviv'd by the frequent Contem∣plation of our Crucified Saviour.

Seventhly, In the beginning of the Cele∣bration of this Ordinance I have oft been in a cold frame; but at the approach of the Ele∣ments this frame has chang'd, and my Soul has been sweetly carried forth to petition for the imparting the Priviledges of Christ's Body bro∣ken, and Benefits annext to it; and I have found from receiving the Elements, the strengthen∣ing power of the Spirit, verifying our Saviour's Words, That his flesh is meat indeed, and his blood drink indeed. This has been a means to preserve me from Anxieties, and to persevere in the frequent Commemorating of Christ's Death prescrib'd in his last Will: I also find, that the more frequent renewing my Vows, makes me more careful to perform them, and that it's more easie to take an account of our Faithfulness to God and our Souls, or of our Neglects, once every Month, than when there is a greater distance between the time of our

Receiving, and Examining our selves, how correspondent our Conversations have been to our Covenant seal'd in that Ordinance.

Eighthly, At the time of partaking this Ordinance, I have often desir'd with ardent Affections, two Things, That I might be spi∣ritually-minded in the whole course of my life, and that Holiness may be advancing in my Soul till I arrive at perfection. This will be attended with solid Comfort, according to the Promise, Great peace to those who keep thy law: And altho' we are to seek the shining face of God, the joyful assurance of his love in the use of his Ordinances; yet since the shedding abroad in the Soul the clear Evidences of God's Love, is a free Dispensation according to the Divine Pleasure, my principal request has been to have a pure Heart and Holy Con∣versation, depending upon God for inward Comfort.

From which Experiences you may upon good ground fear, that when the excuse of neglecting the Sacrament, is because of its being a Solemn Ordinance, and therefore to be seldom receiv'd, is an Error of the Car∣nal Mind, and a Temptation of Satan to di∣vert us from using frequently that means of Grace, which confirms our Faith, inflames our Love, and secures our hope of Glory, and makes us more exact and constant, and com∣fortable in the everlasting way.

I shall conclude this with Advice to those who have not felt those Joyful Emanations in this Ordinance which they have expected, and others of the Saints have enjoy'd; Be not discourag'd from your Duty, but with un∣fainting perseverance, continue in the use of the means of Grace; The Lord waits to be gracious, to bestow his Comforts in the best season: There is sweet Peace in our Obedi∣ence to the Divine Commands, tho' we have not raptures of Joy; And our Obedience is more pleasing to God, when notwithstanding all difficulties and discouragements, it's with Conscience to his commanding-Will perform'd, than when it's made easie by sensible Com∣forts.