Five new plays ... as they were acted by His Majesty's servants at the Theatre-Royal / written by the Honourable Sir Robert Howard.

ACT III.

SCENE I.

Col. Careless, Col. Blunt, and Lieutenant.

Lieu.

BY my faith, a sad Story: I did apprehend this Covenant Wou'd be the Trap.

C. Car.

Never did any Rebels fish with such Cormorants; no Stoppage about their throats; the Rascals are all swallow.

C. Bl.

Now am I ready for any Plot; I'll go find some of these Agitants, and fill up a blank Commission with my Name. And if I can but find two or three gather'd together, They are sure of me; I will please my self, however, With endeavouring to cut their throats.

C. Car.

Or do something to make them hang us, that we may But part on any terms: Nothing anger'd me but that My old Kitchen-stuff-acquaintance look'd another Way, and seem'd not to know me.

C. Bl.

How, Kitchen-stuff acquaintance!

C. Car.

Yes, Mrs Day, that commanded the Party in the Hackney-Coach, was my Father's Kitchen-maid, and in Time of yore called Gillian. How now, Teg?

Enter Teg.

What says the Learned?

Teg.

Well then, upon my Soul, the Man in the great Cloak, with the long Sleeves, is mad, that he is.

C. Car.

Mad, Teg!

Teg.

Yes i'faith is he; he bid me be gone, and said I was sent To mock him.

C. Car.

Why, what didst thou say to him?

Teg.

Well now, I did ask him if he wou'd take any Counsel.

C. Car.

'Slife, he might well enough think thou mock'st him. Why, thou shou'dst have ask'd him when we might have Come for Counsel.

Teg.

Well, that is all one, is it not? If he wou'd take any Counsel, or you wou'd take any Counsel, is not that all one then?

C. Car.

Was there ever such a mistake?

C Bl.

Prethee ne'r be troubled at this; we are past Counsel: If we had but a Friend amongst them, that cou'd but slide Us by this Covenant.

Lieu.

Hark ye, Colonel; what if you did visit this translated Kitchen-maid?

Teg.

Well, how is that? a Kitchen-maid? where is she now?

C. Bl.

The Lieutenant advises well.

C. Car.

Nay, stay, stay; in the first place I'll send Teg to her To tell her I have a little business with her, and desire To know when I may have leave to wait on her.

C. Bl.

We shall have Teg mistake again.

Teg.

How is that so? I will not mistake that Kitchen-maid? Whither must I go now, to mistake that Kitchen-maid?

C Car.

But d'hear, Teg? you must take no notice of that, upon Thy Life; but on the contrary, at every word you must say, Your Ladyship, and your Honour; as for Example, when you have Made a Leg, you must begin thus; My Master presents His service to your Ladyship, and having some business with Your Honour, desires to know when he may have leave To wait upon your Ladyship.

Teg.

Well, that I will do: But was she Your Father's Kitchen-maid?

C Car.

Why, what then?

Teg.

Upon my Soul I shall laugh upon her Face, for all I wou'd not have a mind to do it.

C. Car.

Not for a hundred pounds, Teg; you must be sure to Set your Countenance, and look very soberly before you begin.

Teg.

If I shou'd think then of any Kettles, or Spits, or Any thing that will put a mind into my head of a Kitchen, I shou'd laugh then, shou'd I not?

C. Car.

Not for a thousand pounds, Teg; thou mayst undo us all.

Teg.

Well, I will hope I will not laugh then? I will Keep my mouth if I can, that I will, from running To one side, and 'tother side: well now, where does

This Mrs. Tay live?

Lieu.

Come, Teg, I'le walk along with thee, and shew thee The house, that thou mayest not mistake that however;

Exeunt Lieutenant and Teg.

C. Car.

Prethee do, Lieutenant, have a care, Teg, Thou shalt find us in the Temple. Now, Blunt, have I Another design.

C. Bl.

What further design canst thou have?

C. Car.

Why by this means I may chance see these women Again, and get into their acquaintance.

C. Bl.

With both, man?

C. Car.

'Slife thou art jealous, do'st love either of 'em?

C. Bl.

Nay, I can't tell, all is not as 'twas.

C. Car.

Like a man that is not well, and yet knows Not what ailes him.

C. Bl.

Thou art something near the matter: but I'le Cure my self with considering, that no woman can Ever care for me.

C. Car.

And why prethee?

C. Bl.

Because I can say nothing to them.

C. Car.

The less thou canst say, they'l like thee the better▪ She'l think 'tis Love that has ham-string'd thy tongue: Besides man, a woman can't abide that any thing In the house shou'd talk, but she and her Parrot; What 'tis the Cavalier girle thou lik'st?

C. Bl.

Canst thou love any of the other Breed.

C. Car.

Not honestly,—yet I confess that ill-begotten Pretty Rascal never look'd towards me, but She scatter'd sparks as fast as kindling Charcoale; Thine's grown already to an honest flame: Come, Blunt, when Teg comes we will resolve on something.

Exeunt.

Enter Arbella and Ruth.

Arb.

Come now, a word of our own matters; how do'st Thou hope to get thy Estate again.

Ruth.

You shall drink first; I was just going to ask you, How you would get yours again; you are as fast as if You were under Covert-barne.

Arb.

But I have more hopes than thou hast.

Ruth.

Not a scruple more; if there were but scales That could weigh hopes; for these Rascals must be hang'd Before either of us shall get our own; you may eat and drink Out of yours as I do, and be a sojourner with Abel.

Arb.

I am hamper'd, but I'le intangle my self With Mr. Abel's conjugal cords: nay—I am more Hamper'd than thou thinkest; for if thou art in as bad Case as I (you understand me) hold up thy finger.

Ruth holds up her finger.

Ruth.

Behold, nay, I'le ne're forsake thee, if I were not Smitten, I wou'd perswade my self to be in love, If 'twere but to bear thee company.

Arb.

Dear girl, hark ye, Ruth, the composition day Made an end of all; all's ago.

Ruth.

Nay, that fatal day put me into the condition Of a Compounder too; there was my heart brought Under sequestration.

Arb.

That day, wench?

Ruth.

Yes, that very day with two or three forceable Looks 'twas driven an inch at least out of its old place; Sense or reason can't find the way to't now.

Arb.

That day, that very day, if you and I should like The same man?

Ruth.

Fie upon't, as I live thou mak'st me start; Now dare not I ask which thou lik'st.

Arb.

Wou'd they were now to come in that we might Watch one anothers eyes, and discover by signs; I am not able to ask thee neither.

Ruth.

Nor I to tell thee; shall we go ask Lilly which 'tis?

Arb.

Out upon him; nay, there's no need of Stars; We know our selves if we durst speak.

Ruth.

Pish, I'le speak if it be the same, we'l draw cuts.

Arb.

No, hark ye, Ruth, do you act them both, For you saw their several humors, and then watch my Eyes, where I appear most concern'd; I can't dissemble for my heart.

Ruth.

I dare swear that will hinder thee to dissemble Indeed,—Come have at you then, I'le speak as if I were Before the honourable rascals: And first, for my brave Blunt Colonel, who hating to take the Oath, cry'd out With a brave scorn (such as made thee in love I hope) Hang your selves, rascals, the time will come when those That dare be honest will be rewarded; don't I act him bravely, don't I act him bravely?

Arb.

O admirably well, dear wench, do it once more.

Ruth.

Nay, nay, I must do the 'tother now.

Arb.

No, no, this once more, dear girle, and I'le Act the 'tother for thee.

Ruth.

No forsooth, I'le spare your pains, we are right, No need of Cuts, send thee good luck with him I acted, And wish me well with my merry Colonel That shall act his own part.

Arb.

And a thousand good lucks attend thee; We have sav'd our blushes admirably well, and reliev'd Our hearts from hard duty—but mum, see where the Mother Comes, and with her, her Son, a true exemplification or Duplicate of the original Day. Now for a charge.

Enter Mrs. Day and Abel.

Ruth.

Stand fair, the Enemy draws up.

Mrs. Day.

Well, Mrs. Arbella, I hope you have consider'd Enough by this time; you need not use so much consideration For your own good; you may have your Estate, and you May have Abel, and you may be worse offer'd. Abel, tell her your mind, ne're stand, shall I, shall I— Ruth, does she incline, or is she wilful?

Ruth.

I was just about the point when your Honor Interrupted us.—One word in your Ladiships ear.

Abel.

You see forsooth that I am some body, though you Make no body of me, you see I can prevail; therefore Pray say what I shall trust to; For I must not stand, shall I, shall I.

Arb.

You are hasty, Sir.

Abel.

I am call'd upon by Important affairs;

And therefore I must be bold in a fair way to tell you that It lies upon my spirit exceedingly.

Arb.

Saffron-posset-drink is very good against The heaviness of the Spirit.

Abel.

Nay, forsooth, you do not understand my meaning

Arb.

You do, I hope, Sir; and 'tis no matter, Sir, if one of us know it.

Enter Teg.

Teg.

Well, know? who are all you?

Arb.

What's here, an Irish Elder come to examine us all.

Teg.

Well know, what is your names, ever one?

Ruth.

Arbella, this is a Servant to one of the Colonels; upon My life, 'tis the Irishman that took the Covenant The right way.

Arb.

Peace, what shou'd it mean?

Teg.

Well, cannot some of you all say nothing?

Mrs.

Day. Why how now sauce-box? what wou'd you have? What have you left your manners without? go Our and fetch 'em in.

Teg.

What shou'd I fetch now?

Mrs.

Day D'you know who you speak to, Sirrah?

Teg.

Well, what are you then? upon my soul In my own Countrey they can tell who I am.

Abel.

You must not be so saucy unto her Honour.

Teg.

Well, I will knock you, if you be saucy with me then.

Ruth.

This is miraculous.

Teg.

Is there none of you that I must speak to now?

Arb.

Now, wench, if he shou'd be sent to us.

Aside.

Teg.

Well I wou'd have one Mrs. Tay speak unto me.

Mrs.

Day. Well, Sirrah, I am she: what's your business?

Teg.

O so then, are you Mrs. Tay? Well, I will look well first, And I will set my face in some worship; yes indeed that I will; And I will tell her then what I will speak to her.

Ruth.

How the fellow begins to mould himself.

Arb.

And tempers his Chops like a hound that has lap'd Before his meat was cold enough.

Ruth.

He looks as if he had some gifts to pour forth; Those are Mr. Day's own white eyes before he begins To say grace: now for a speech ratling in his kecher, As if his words stumbled in their way.

Teg.

Well, now I will tell thee, I'faith my Master The good Colonel Careless, bid me ask thy good Ladiship— Upon my soul now the laugh will come upon me.

He laughs alwayes when he says Ladiship or Honor.

Mrs. Day.

Sirrah, sirrah, what were you sent to abuse me?

Ruth.

As sure as can be.

Aside.

Teg.

I'saith now I do not abuse thy good Hon. I cannot Help my laugh now, I will try agen now; I will not Think of a Kitchin then: my master wou'd know Of your Ladiship—

Mrs. Day.

Did your Master send you to abuse me, you Rascal: By my honor, Sirrah?

Teg.

Why do'st thou mock thy self now joy?

Mrs. Day.

How, Sirrah, do I mock my self?

This is some Irish Traytor.

Teg.

I am no Traytor, that I am not; I am an Irish Rebel; you are couzen'd now.

Mrs. Day.

Sirrah, Sirrah, I will make you know who I am, an impudent Irish Rascal.

Abel.

He seemeth a dangerous Fellow, and of a bold and Seditious Spirit.

Mrs. Day.

You are a bloody Rascal, I warrant ye.

Teg.

You are a foolish brabble bribble Woman, that you are.

Abel.

Sirrah, we that are at the head of affairs Must punish your Sauciness.

Teg.

You shall take a knock upon your Pate, if you are Saucy with me, that I shall; you Son of a Roundhead, you.

Mrs. Day.

Ye Rascally Varlet, get you out of my Doors.

Teg.

Will not I give you my Message then?

Mrs. Day.

Get you out, Rascal?

Teg.

I prethee let me tell thee my Message?

Mrs. Day.

Get you out, I say.

Teg.

Well then I care not neither; the Devil take Your Ladyship, and Honourship, and Kitchenship too: there now.

Exit.

Arb.

Was there ever such a Scene? 'tis impossible To guess any thing.

Ruth.

Our Colonels have don't, as sure as thou livest, to Make themselves sport; being all the revenge that is in Their power: look, look, how her Honour trots about, Like a Beast stung with Flies.

Mrs. Day.

How the Villain has distemper'd me! Out upon't too, that I have let the Rascal go unpublish'd, And you can stand by like a Sheep: run after him then, and Stop him; I'll have him laid by the heels, and Make him confess who sent him to abuse me: Call help as you go, make haste I say.

Exit Abel.

Ruth.

'Slid Arbella, run after him, and save the poor Fellow for Sakes sake; Stop Abel by any means, That he may scape.

Arb.

Keep his Dam off, and let me alone with the Puppy.

Exit.

Ruth

Fear not.

Mrs. Day.

'Uds my Life, the Rascal has heated me.—Now I Think on't, I'll go my self, and see it done: a saucy Villain.

Ruth.

But I must needs acquaint your Honour with one thing ••••••st concerning Mrs. Arbella.

Mrs. Day.

As soon as ever I have done. Is't good news, Wench?

Ruth.

Most Excellent; if you go out you may spoil all; Such a discovery I have made, that you will bless The accident that anger'd you.

Mrs. Day.

Quickly then, Girl.

Ruth.

When you sent Abel after the Irish-man, Mrs. Arbella's Colour came and went in her Face, and at last Not able to stay, slunk away after him for fear the Irish-man Shou'd hurt him: she stole away and blush'd the prettiest.

Mrs. Day.

I protest he may be hurt indeed; I'll run my self too.

Ruth.

By no means, forsooth; nor is there any need on't; For the resolv'd to stop him before he cou'd Get near the Irish-man; she has done it upon my Life; And if you shou'd go out you might spoil the kindest Encounter that the loving Abel is ever like to have.

Mrs. Day.

Art sure of this?

Ruth.

If you do not find she has stopt him, Let me ever have your hatred; pray credit me.

Mrs. Day.

I do, I do believe thee; come, we'll go in where I use to read: there thou shalt tell me all the particulars, And the manner of it: I warrant 'twas pretty to observe.

Ruth.

O, 'twas a thousand pities you did not see't, When Abel walk'•• away so bravely, and foolishly after this Wild Irish-man: She stole such kind looks from her Own Eyes; and having rob'd her self, sent them after Her own Abel; and then—

Mrs. Day

Come, good Wench, I'll go in, and hear it all at Large; it shall be the best tale thou hast told these two days. Come, come, I long to hear all. Abel for his part needs No News by this time, come, good Wench.

Exit.

Ruth.

So far I am right; Fortune take care for future things.

Enter C. Blunt as taken by Bayliffs.

C. Bl.

At whose Suit, Rascals?

1 B▪

You shall know that time enough.

C. Bl.

Time enough, Dogs; must I wait your leisures?

1 B.

O you are a dangerous Man; 'tis such Traytors as you That disturb the Peace of the Nation.

C. Bl.

Take that, Rascal: if I had any thing at liberty Besides my Foot, I wou'd bestow it on you.

1 B.

You shall pay dearly for this kick before you are Let loose, and give good special Bail: Mark that, my Surly Companion; we have you fast.

C. Bl.

'Tis well, Rogues, you caught me conveniently; Had I been aware I wou'd have made some of your scurvy Souls my special Bail.

1 B.

O, 'tis a bloody-minded Man; I'll warrant ye this Vile Cavalier has eat many a Child.

C. Bl.

I cou'd gnaw a piece or two of you, Rascals.

Enter C. Careless.

C. Car.

How is this! Blunt in hold! you Catchpole, Let go your prey, or—

Draws, and Blunt in the scu••••••e throws up one of their heels, and gets a Sword, and helps drive them off.

1 B▪

Murder, Murder.

C. Bl.

Faith, Careless, this was worth thanks, I was fairly going.

C. Car.

What was the matter, Man?

C. Bl.

Why, an Action or two for Free Quarter, now made Trover and Conversion: Nay, I believe we shall be sued With an Action of Trespass; for every Field we have Marched over, and be indited for Riots, for going at Unseasonable hours, above two in a Company.

Enter Teg running.

C. Car.

Well come, let's away.

Teg.

Now upon my Soul run as I do; the Men in red Coats are running too, that they are, and they cry, Murder, Murder, I never heard such a noise in Ireland, that's true too.

C. Car.

'Slife we must shift several ways. Farewel, if we scape we meet at night; I shall Take heed now.

Teg.

Shall I tell of Mrs. Tay now?

C. Car.

O good Teg, no time for Messages.

Exeunt several ways.

Enter Bayliffs and Souidiers.

A noise within.

1 B.

This way, this way; Oh Villains, my Neighbour ••••••sh is hurt dangerously; Some good Souldiers, follow, follow.

Enter Careless and Teg again.

C. Car.

I am quite out of breath, and the Blood Hounds Are in a full cry upon a burning scent: Plague on 'em, What a noise the Kennels make? what Door's this That graciously stands a little open? what an Ass am I to ask? Teg, Scout abroad; if any thing happens extraordinary, Observe this Door; there you shall find me: be careful, Now by your favour, Landlord, as unknown.

Exeunt severally.

Enter Mrs. Day and Obadiah.

Mrs. Day.

It was well observed, Obadiah, to bring the Parties to me first, 'tis your Master's will that I shou'd, as I May say, prepare matters for him; in truth, in truth I have too great a burthen upon me: yet for the publick Good I am content to undergo it.

Obad.

I shall with sincere care present unto your Honour From time to time such negotiations as I may discreetly Presume may be material for your Honours inspection.

Mrs. Day.

It will become you so to do, you have the Present that came last.

Obad.

Yes, and please your Honour; the Gentleman Concerning her Brothers release, hath also Sent in a piece of Plate.

Mrs. Day.

It's very well.

Obad.

But the Man without, about a bargain of the Kings Land, is come empty.

Mrs. Day.

Bid him be gone, I'll not speak with him; He does not understand himself.

Obad.

I shall intimate so much to him.

As Obadiah goes out, C. Careless meets him and tumbles him back.

Mrs. Day.

Why how now? what rude Companion's this? What wou'd you have (what's your business? what's the Matter? who sent you? who d'you belong to? who!—

C Car.

Hold, hold, if you mean to be answer'd to all These Interrogatories, you see I resolve to be your Companion; I am a Man, there's no great matter, no body sent me; nor I Belong to no body: I think I have answer'd to the chief Heads.

Mrs. Day.

Thou hast committed murder for ought I know? How is't, Obadiah?

C. Car.

Ha, what luck have I to fall into the Territories Of my old Kitchen acquaintance; I'll proceed upon the Strength of Teg's Message, though I had no answer.

Mrs. Day.

How is't, Man?

Obad.

Truly he came forceably upon me, and I fear Has bruised some intellectuals within my Stomach.

Ex. Oba.

Mrs. Day.

Go in and take some Irish Slat by way of Prevention, and keep your self warm. Now, Sir, have you Any business, you that came in so rudely as if you did not Know who you came to. How came you in, Sir Royster? Was not the Porter at the Gate?

C. Car.

No truly, the Gate kept it self, and stood gaping

As if it had a mind to speak, and say, I pray come in.

Mrs. Day.

Did it so, Sir? and what have you to say?

C. Car.

I, there's the point; either she does not, or will Not know me: What shou'd I say? how dull am I? Pox on't, This wit is like a common Friend, when one has need on him, He won't come near one.

Mrs. Day.

Sir, are you studying for an invention? for ought I know you have done some mischief, And 'twere sit to secure you?

C. Care.

So that's well, 'twas pretty to fall into the head Quarter of the Enemy.

Mrs. Day.

Nay, 'tis e'n so, I'll fetch Those that shall examine you.

C. Car.

Stay, thou mighty States-woman, I did but Give you time to see if your memory would but be so Honest, as to tell you who I am.

Mrs. Day.

What d'you mean, Sauce-box?

C. Car.

There's a word yet of thy former imployments, That Sauce: you and I have been acquainted.

Mrs. Day.

I do not use to have acquaintance with Cavaliers.

C. Car.

Nor I with Committee-mens Utensils; but in Diebus illis, you were not Honourable, nor I a Malignant. Lord, Lord, you are horrible forgetful, Pride comes with Godliness, and good Cloaths; what, you think I shou'd Not know you, because you are disguised with curl'd Hair, And white Gloves. Alas, I know you as well as if you were In your Sabbath-days Cinamon Waistcoat, with a silver Edging round the Skirt.

Mrs. Day.

How, Sirrah?

C. Car.

And with your fair hands bath'd in Lather, or With your fragrant Breath, driving the fleeting Ambergreece off from the waving Kitchenstuff.

Mrs. Day.

O, you are an impudent Cavalier! I remember You now indeed; but I'll—

C. Car.

Nay, but hark you the now Honourable, Non obstante past conditions; did not I send my Fool Man, An Irish-man, with a civil Message to you; Why all this strangeness then.

Mrs. Day.

How, how, how's this; was't you that sent That Rascal to abuse me, was't so.

C. Car.

How now! what, matters grow worse and worse?

Mrs. Day.

I'll teach you to abuse those that are in Authority: Within there, who's within?

C. Car.

'Slife, I'll stop your mouth, if you raise an Alarm.

Cryes out, and he stops her mouth▪

Mrs. Day.

Stop my mouth, Sirrah, whoo, whoo, ho.

C. Car.

Yes, stop your mouth, what are you good at a Who, bub, ha.

Enter Ruth.

Ruth.

What's the matter, Forsooth.

Mrs. Day.

The matter? why heres a rude Cavalier has Broke into my House; 'twas he too that sent the Irish Rascal To abuse me too within my own Walls: Call your Father, that He may grant his Order to secure him. 'Tis a dangerous Fellow.

C. Car.

Nay, good pretty Gentlewoman, spare your motion, What must become of me? Teg has made some strange mistake.

Ruth.

'Tis he, what shall I do, (now invention be equal to My Love) why, your Ladiship will spoil all? I sent for

aside.

This Gentleman, and enjoyn'd him secrecy, even to you your self, Till I had made his way. O fie upon't, I am to blame; but in Truth I did not think he would have come these two hours.

C Car.

I dare swear she did not; I might very probably Not have come at all.

Ruth.

How came you to come so soon, Sir; 'twas three Hours before you appointed.

C. Car.

Hey day, I shall be made believe I came hither On purpose presently.

Ruth.

'Twas upon a message of his to me, and please your Honour to make his desires known to your Ladiship, that he Had consider'd on't and was resolved to take the Covenant, And give you five hundred pound to make his peace, and bring His business about again, that he may be Admitted in his first condition.

C. Car.

What's this? d'hear, pretty Gentlewoman.

Ruth.

Well, well, I know your mind, I have done your business.

Mrs. Day.

Oh, his stomach's come down!

Ruth.

Sweeten him again, and leave him to me; I warrant you the five hundred pound and—

Whispers.

C. Car.

Now I have found it: this pretty wench has A mind to be left alone with me, at her peril.

Mrs. Day.

I understand thee; well, Sir, I can pass by rudeness When I am informed there was no intention of it; I leave You and my Daughter to beget a right understanding.

C. Car.

We should beget Sons and Daughters sooner: What does all this mean?

Ruth.

I am sorry, Sir, that your love for me Shou'd make you thus rash.

C. Car.

That's more than you know, but you had a mind To be lest alone with me; that's certain.

Ruth.

'Tis too plain, Sir, you'd ne'er have run your self Into this danger else.

C. Car.

Nay, now you'r out; the danger run after me.

Ruth.

You may dissemble.

C. Car.

Why, 'tis the proper business here; but we lose Time; you and I are left to beget right understanding, Come, which way?

Ruth.

Whither?

C. Car.

To your Chamber or Closet.

Ruth.

But I am ingag'd you shall take the Covenant.

C. Car.

No, I never swear when I am bid.

Ruth.

But you wou'd do as bad?

C. Car.

That's not against my principles.

Ruth.

Thank you for your fair opinion, good Signior Principle, there lies your way, Sir, however I will own so much Kindness for you, that I repent not the civility I have done, To free you from the trouble you were like to fall into; Make me a leg, if you please, and cry, Thank you: and so the Gentlewoman that desired to be left alone with you, desires To be left alone with her self, she being taught a right Understanding of you.

C. Car.

No, I am revited; nor shall you march off thus With flying colours: my pretty Commander in chief, let us

Parley a little farther, and but lay down ingenuously the true State of our Treaty. The business in short is this, We differ Seemingly upon two evils, and mine the least; and therefore To be chosen, you had better take me, than I take the Covenant.

Ruth.

We'll excuse one another.

C. Car.

You wou'd not have me take the Covenant then.

Ruth.

No, I did but try you, I forgive your idle looseness; For that firm vertue be constant to your fair principles In spite of fortune.

C. Car.

What's this got into petti-coats—but d'hear, I'le not excuse you from my proposition, notwithstanding My release: Come we are half way to a right Understanding—nay, I do love thee.

Ruth.

Love vertue, you have but here and there a patch Of it; y'are ragged still.

C. Car.

Are you not the Committee Day's Daughter?

Ruth.

Yes, what then.

C. Car.

Then am I thankful, I had no defence against thee And Matrimony, but thy own Father and Mother, Which are a perfect Committee to my nature.

Ruth.

Why are you sure I wou'd have match'd with a Malignant, not a Compounder neither.

C. Car.

Nay, I have made thee a Joynture against my will; Methinks it were but as reasonable, that I shou'd do something For my Joynture, but by the way of Matrimony honestly To encrease your Generation; this, to tell you truth, is Against my Conscience.

Ruth.

Yet you wou'd beget right understandings.

C. Car.

Yes, I wou'd have 'um all Bastards.

Ruth.

And me a Whore.

C. Car.

That's a coarse name; but 'tis not sit a Committee- Man's Daughter should be too honest, to the reproach Of her Father and Mother.

Ruth.

When the quarrel of the Nation is reconcil'd, you And I shall agree: till when, Sir—

Enter Teg.

Teg.

Are you here then? upon my shoul the good Colonel Blunt is over-taken again now, and carried to the Devil, That he is, I'saith now.

C. Car.

How, taken and carried to the Devil!

Teg.

He desired to go to the Devil, that he did, I wonder of My shoul he was not afraid of that.

C. Car.

I understand it now; what mischief's this?

Ruth.

You seem troubled, Sir.

C. Car.

I have but a life to lose, that I am weary of: come, Teg.

Ruth.

Hold, you shan't go before I know the business; What d'ye talk of?

C. Car.

My friend, my dearest friend is caught up by rascally Bayliffs, and carried to the Devil-Tavern; pray let me go.

Ruth.

Stay but a minute, if you have any kindness for me.

C. Car.

Yes, I do love you.

Ruth.

Perhaps I may serve your friend.

Enter Arbella.

O Arbella, I was going to seek you.

Arb.

What's the matter?

Ruth

The Colonel which thou lik'st is taken by Bayliffs; There's his Friend too almost distracted: You know The mercy of these times

Arb.

What do'st thou tell me, I am ready to sink down!

Ruth.

Compose your self, and help him nobly; you have no Way but to smile upon Abel, and get him to bail him.

Enter Abel and Obadiah.

Arb.

Look where he and Obadiah comes; shou'd either By providence—O Mr. Abel, where have you been this long Time? can you find of your heart to keep thus out of my sight▪

Abel.

Assuredly, some important affairs constrain'd my Absence, as Obadiah can testifie, Bona fide.

Obad.

I can do so verily, my self being a material party.

C. Car.

Pox on 'em, how slow they speak.

Arb.

Well, well, you shall go no more out of my sight; I'll Not be satisfied with your Bona fides: I have some occasions That call me to go a little way; you shall e'en go with me, And good Obadiah too: you shall not deny me any thing.

Abel.

Is it not meet I shou'd, I am exceedingly exalted; Obadiah thou shalt have the best bargain of all my Tenants.

Obad.

I am thankful.

C. Car.

What may this mean?

Aside.

Arb.

Ruth, how shall we do to keep thy swift Mother From pursuing us?

Ruth.

Let me alone, as I go by the Parlor where she sits, Big with expectation; I'le give her a whisper that we Are going to fetch the very five hundred pound.

Arb.

How can that be?

Ruth.

No question now. Will you march, Sir?

C. Car.

Whither?

Ruth.

Lord, how dull these men in Love are! why to your Friend. No more words.

C. Car.

I will stare upon thee though.

Exeunt.