Proteus redivivus, or, The art of wheedling or insinuation obtain'd by general conversation and extracted from the several humours, inclinations, and passions of both sexes, respecting their several ages, and suiting each profession or occupation / collected and methodized by the author of the first part of the English rogue.

The Sixth Qualification of a Wheedle, Humility.

IF you will but consider, how ambitious man is, and how much he covets honour, and re∣spect, you will then conclude Humility to be an excellent Trap or Gin to catch such Wood-cocks, who having nothing splendid in themselves, seek, nay dearly purchase sometimes these outward appearances, and submissions from others, to force or extort an Estimation from the people; and never do these Fops more betray how con∣scious they are of the poorness of their own Merit, than when they liberally reward their cringing Admirers. Humility, as it is the low∣est step to the highest Stair-case, so it is always the dirtiest, and yet it is the first step to the top: he that will safely mount, and that securely too, to the summity of Honour, ought gradually to ascend, beginning with the lowest step, Humility, if otherwise, by precipitating, he may endanger the breaking of his Neck.

The wary Wheedle knows this very well, and will not omit any opportunity, wherein he may make use of so gainful, though seeming poor and ragged companion: & though he entertain within never so great a Pride; and Ambition, yet it is prejudicial to show it, and therefore he conceals

that Vice with a pretended Humility, which he makes appear in his outward Behaviour five se∣veral ways; in his Apparel, Countenance, Ge∣stures, Words, and Actions.

First, his garb he suits according to the peo∣ple he is concern'd withal; If this Proteus hath any business with sober Citizens, he endeavors to Cloath himself civilly, not Phantastically A la mode, whose Breeches prevent the question, What, would you have your Arse hung with Points? Yet his Cloaths are not so absolutely out of Fashion, but that they have some Affinity and Relation to what is in present Vogue and Esti∣mation, at least they stand Neuter, or equally concern'd with the present and precedent fashion.

If his business lie among the Saints, (as they call themselves, those perverse and obstinate Dissenters from the Church of England) he then attires himself as contrary to the Mode, as he can find presidents among them, and cares not how ridiculous his garments appear in the Eyes of the Wicked, so that thereby he may Cheat and Cozen the Godly.

As for his Countenance, he frames that accor∣ding to the Nature of the People he is to con∣verse withal that day; if with Merchants, or wealthy Tradesmen, he takes a modest liberty to be chearful, with a moderate laughter, not

loud, not flouting, and if he fears he hath ex∣ceeded his bounds therein, he soon recalls him∣self by a modest regard, and reconciles himself to himself, and the Company by what obsequi∣ous and respectful Ceremonies he can think of, proper to the present occasion.

If he be in a Phanatical Society, he takes spe∣cial cognizance of their countenances, and frames his as like them as he can, which is a hard mat∣ter for him to do, (by reason of the Variety) without a great deal of Practice. As first for his Eyes, they must for a while be fixt, and stand still, as the Sun in Joshua's time, and then on a sudden, lest any should say, black is his eye, there is nothing to be seen but the whites; for his sight is gone, into the Labyrinth of his Brain; in search of his Soul, to ask the Question, whe∣ther she is ready for her Journey to Heaven. Next he imitates the pulling down of the nea∣ther Jaw to make his face look long and lean, the certain indicium of the Mortification of the flesh; the next is the contraction of his Lips, the gathering up of his Chin, the thrusting out of his Head, and the sour Faces he makes, would make one believe, that he is about to make a Close-stool of his Breeches, and being very Costive, he strains hard, but cannot do it with∣out the help of a skilful Midwife, a known Professor.

In the third place we must consider his words, which are very pleasant, and always like blancht Almonds set in white Sugar; when he hath tickled your Ears so long as his Invention will hold out, or the occasion permit, he then will give others leave to speak, and will hearken with profound Reverence and Attention, ap∣plauding every thing that is spoken, not daring to interrupt with the least contradiction, and at the end of the Discourse, concludes he never heard more Reason till then uttered, in so short a time; that each syllable contain'd a whole world of deep wisdom and understanding; and then a little after, takes him aside whom he hath thus ap∣plauded, and by some plausible pretence, bor∣rows an Angel of him to be his Guardian to his Habitation. Sometimes as his necessity com∣pels him, he steps into a Meeting-house, and there takes his Cue to hold forth a while, and being out of breath, he concludes his Non∣sence with the Persecution of the Saints; and by laying open their grievances, he tacitly hints at his own Poverty, and exhorts them to Brotherly love and Compassion, and is then recompenced for his vain Babble by a plain Contribution: but more of this in its proper Chapter of the Non∣conforming Teacher.

Lastly, let us take a view of his Humility in his Actions, and that in a three-fold manner;

first, to Superiors let there be all Reverence and respect shown, that thereby he may give them to understand how well he knows his Duty, and how much he admires, and honours their Dignity and Persons, by this means he invades their Affections, and by the perseverance of this respectful Deportment, he in time so over∣comes, or conquers their former Indifferency to do him good, that now they zealously study how to promote his Interest.

Secondly, where any thing is to be gotten, he will descend below his Equals, filling their Bladder with the wind of vain Applauses, know∣ing when to prick and let it out again when he pleases. This condescention gains him very great Estimation amongst the Sober and Judi∣cious, who look upon him to be a very hum∣ble man indeed that will submit to his Equals; but especially in the third place, when they see he does it even to those who are Beneath him, and are his Inferiors; this gains him cre∣dit, whether a Tradesman or not; for every one Believes as he is no proud Man, he can∣not easily be a profuse Man, and he that hath so much discretion in his humble Carriage, hath so much judgment to manage his business and expence with Prudence and Moderation, by which means the fear of what mony is lent, or goods intrusted, will not be mis-imployed, but

having made proper and good use thereof, the Creditor will in due time be repay'd satisfa∣ctorily, and with gratitude.

Before I conclude this Chapter, it is requi∣site I tell you how cautious our Wheedle is in the practice of his Humility; for he carefully observes a Mediocrity, not debasing himself too low, lest it should render him Despicable, but restraining his Humility within the bounds of Courtesie, and decent Affability; by his gentile Salutations and civil carriage, he obliges all, either Superior, Equal, or Inferior, imitating Caesar, who wone the Peoples hearts by Cares∣sing, and flattering even the vilest that were a∣mong them; and if we will but look home, we shall find several of our Nobles and Gentry have risen to a vast height of popularity, by be∣ing not indebted to the Commonalty for Civi∣lity, but rather making them their Debtors, by giving them such Presidents of an Humble, Sweet, and generous Deportment, that it was impossible for them to imitate; but I must desist from further enlarging this Chapter, ha∣ving unawares fallen into the Seventh Qualifica∣tion of a Wheedle.