The Mall, or, The modish lovers a comedy : acted by His Majesties servants.

Actus Primus,

Scena Prima.

Enter Lovechange solus.

Lov.

A Pox of this Love, how damn'd and Idle t'has made me, here have I march'd a long half hour, which Egad is an Age to me, to wait for this Ambassadour of my amo∣rous Negotiation, pray Heaven no Rival of mine leads her into Temptation!

Oh Lady!

Enter Peg.

Peg.

O Lord! What make you here so early?

Lov.

Oh Peg, thou know'st Love is a restless Bedfellow, Peg, alas, who could sleep, that could but hope the blessing of seeing thy sweet Mistress. Peg, Well, what news, what news, from Cupids Court Wench, ha! Will she be kind, and consider my Passion, faith I am but a dead Man without a little comfort.

Peg.

Faith Sir, I am not idle in your behalf, I take all opportu∣nities (which is) when her Husband's out of the way, to let her know my thoughts of you, which Ile assure you Sir are most advantagious.

Lov.

I am beholding to thee Peg.

Peg.

But you know Sir, she's a married Woman, and ought to be very cautious.

Lov.

Oh Peg, I love her with a vertuous Flame, believe me I do! and if thou wouldst but swear and lye, and use a small kind of Treachery in the Case —

Peg.

You need not doubt such small services Sir — But—

Lov.

But thou must be a little encouraged, is it so? Here, here's a pair of Angels to invite thee to speak.—

gives her Money.

Peg.

Do you take me for Balaams Ass Sir, that can't speak with∣out a Prompter, however Sir, you court me in no common Language.

Lov.

Oh thou art a Saint, that will despise a Prayer, made in the vulgar Tongue, here Proxy, here's my Hand, and Seal, get it de∣liver'd, and further the design.

Peg.

I, but Sir, is there no harm in't?

Lov.

What dost thou call harm?

Peg.

I mean Sir, is there nothing, but what I may carry with Honour?

Lov.

Fye, fye Peg, dost think I'de make a Bawd of thee?

Peg.

I hope you wou'd not at my years.

Lov.

Right, having so many yet to come of the kind and amo∣rous ones, But this Letter Peg is only to invite thy Mistress into the Park to night. I know the Evening will be fair, and if she can make an escape from that old impotent Letcher her Husband, I shall be glad to kiss her hands there.

Peg.

Is this all?

Lov.

Upon my Life.

Peg.

Then rest in hope, for I dare promise ye.

Lov.

Farewel dear Peg.

Peg.

Your Servant sweet Mr. Lovechange.

Exit Peg.

Enter Courtwell who meets Lovechange going out.

Lov.

Courtwell!

Court.

Lovechange, I have been a dozen times at thy Lodging to see thee, but, like the Devil, thou art always ranging about, seeking whom thou canst devour.

Lov.

Thou hast small reason to accuse me Courtwell, for since thy arrival from Spain I have not enjoy'd thee at our old rate; we were wont to Whose, and drink together like loving Brothers in Iniqui∣ty, but I think thou now hast taken up a little of the Formality of

the Climate, and dost all thy Debaucheries in secret.

Court.

No Ned, I have rather learnt the sobriety of that Nation, and have left off those lewd courses.

Lov.

Nay, if thou bee'st come to that, to call e'm lewd thoud'st better e'n have staid amongst e'm, for thou art unfit for this Town Egad Will.

Court.

I think I had not so soon abandon'd that agreeable place, but for the Commands of my Uncle Easy, upon whom my Fortune does so depend, that I dare not disobey him in any thing.

Lov.

What, Ile warrant ye, he has that old fashion'd design of Matrimony in his head, he means to marry thee.

Court.

Some such thing.

Lov.

And who is the wretched thing, I pray?

Court.

The rich Widdow Wou'dbee, she's damn'd ill-favour'd, and they say as ill natur'd, but she'l serve for a Wife Ned.

Lov.

How, the Widdow Wou'dbee—my Wife Egad!

aside

Court.

Yes the very same.

Lov.

Hark ye William, I don't like the match William!

Court.

Your Reasons?

Lov.

I have divers, and sundry — That must be nameless

aside

Court.

Let's hear a few of them.

Lov.

Why, first she's Old, next Jealous, she is, to Damnation, Proud, Expensive, and —

Court.

This is all nothing.

Lov.

She is beside— a Plague on him I dare not discover—

aside

Court.

What Sir?

Lov.

Nay, nay dear heart, no passion prithee, for she's very honest, which makes her very insolent.

Court.

Oh I am glad 'twas no worse.

Lov.

Worse! Nay here's ill qualities enough for one Woman a Conscience — But prithee was there never a Dona in all Spain worthy your kindness, but you must come back to England, and like a Iew, be forc'd to Wed in your own Tribe, ha!

Court.

Prithee don't call any Sins to remembrance, Oh Friend! I had a Mistress in Spain, and such a Mistress, so kind, so fair—

Lov.

And so tyr'd you out with loving, was't not so? Aye there's the Devil on't.

Court.

No, in an unhappy Adventure wherein I took the party of an English Cavaleir my Friend, I kill'd her Brother, who was of Quality sufficient to cause me to fear the inquisition, so I was forc'd to quit Spain, and meeting with the Command of my Uncle—

Lov.

You soon lost the thoughts of your Mistress, and I shall ad∣vise you, as you love health and liberty! two excellent qualities, to loose the thoughts of this Widdow too.

Court.

Nay, since I cannot marry where I like, Ile e'n marry for a World of Money, that's the next way, and the nearest I know to happiness, therefore I am resolved to put on the Fetters.

Lov.

Pox on't they'l gingle after thee at that rate that all pretty Ladies will shun thee for a fusty Husband, and who would be ty'd up from Ranging.

Court.

There are Ladies Ned, who consider not the Man, but his Pockets, half a peece for a clean pair of Sheets, half a Crown for a thrice retayl'd Bottle of Rhenish, and —

Lov.

The Pox into the bargain.

Court.

The Pox in others will be but the Gout in me.

Enter a Boy.

Boy.

Your Uncle Sir, stays for you to go make a visit to the Widdow Woodbee.

Court.

Ile attend him.

Lov.

You ought to ask me leave first Sir, if you knew all— Tis well I am not a jealous Husband, and 'tis better I have no tempt∣ing Wife.

[aside]

Well Sir you will go then—

Court.

Without doubt.

Lov.

Well Love speed you Sir, 'tis well you're young enough to spare some hours, for o'my Conscience tis meer loss of time.

Court.

Farewel, farewel Sir, ha, ha, ha.

Lov.

Let them laugh that win Sir, adieu.

Exeunt severally.

Scene Second.

Enter Perigreene, and Servant.

Perig.

For Mrs. Woodbee at her house in

Reading the super∣scription of a Letter.

St. Iames's street,— London.— Sure 'tis hereabout.

Ser.

This must be the house Ile knock till they answer.

knocks

Enter Clare.

Is this the Lady Woodbee's, Sweetheart?

Clare.

It is Sir, may I know your affairs with her, for she is a little busie at present.

Per.

I am a Stranger by Nation a Spaniard, and bring her Letters from her Brother who is Consul there.

Clare.

Please you walk in Sir.—

They go in and return.

Per.

Well Diego, thus far our business is prosperous, we are arriv'd to a Land, rich, and beautiful, and where the civility of the Inhabi∣tants give me all the encouragement I can expect, grant ye gods I may find out this perfidious Renigado of Love, and Ile forgive what e're you make me suffer another way.

Enter Mrs. Woodbee and Clare.

Madam, you I take it are the Lady to whom I am addrest, & these will inform you, why I take this freedom.

Gives her Letters, she reads

Woud.

Sir, I am not only oblig'd by the Laws of good manners, and civility to receive you well as a Stranger, but the Character my Brother gives me of you, binds me to a more strict observance: Sir, you're welcome, believe so, and command my house.

Per.

Madam, you honour me, and if I take a freedom that unbe∣comes me, charge it on your bounty, not my boldness.

Wood.

A pretty youth introth Clare, is it not?

Clare.

Yes indeed Madam.

Enter Mr. Easy and Courtwell.

Per.

Madam, Ile take my leave for a few hours to see the City, which done Ile wait on you agen.

kisses her hand.

Easy.

So, right Woman, can no more be without a Man, then a Puritan without his Bible.

Court.

The Widdow looks very amorous upon him, methinks tis a fine Youth.

To Easy aside.

Wood.

Mr. Easy, Sir your servant.

Easy.

No interruption, Lady, no interruption.

Wood.

None in the World Sir I protest, this is a Person of Worth and Merit, recommended to me by the only Brother I have, and for whose sake besides his own I am oblig'd to pay him my respects.

Easy.

By my faith, and he deserves it Lady, he is handsome, and young — But Lady, I have, once more, brought my Nephew to wait on you, and to know your resolution concerning those propo∣sitions I made you of Marriage, Ile make short work on't, I'me no Courtier, but let him speak for himself, he can talk many fine things of Love, and the like — In the mean time Ile take a turn in the Garden.

Exit Easy

Per.

gods! Is not that Courtwell? I must withdraw, or dye; in what a happy hour am I arriv'd, to be a witness of his injustice! Oh Fortune! thou hast recompenc'd me for all the injuries thou hast done me,

[aside]

Madam! your humble Servant, it shall not be many hours before I kiss your hands agen.

Wood.

They will seem many to me,

Exit Perigreen looking with scorn on Courtwell.

believe me Gentle Sir.

Court.

I find Widdow, though you profess a great deal of cruelty, and coldness to me, you can be kind too, when you please.

Wood.

I am sorry you should take me for an insensible Mr. Court∣well, though for many reasons I am forc'd to say I cannot admit of any concern for your self, in a Word Sir I have reasons (that must be secret ones) to tell you, I cannot entertain your passion, I am a Person Sir, that —

Court.

Seems to have heat enough about you Widdow for half a score, faith view me well, I am a strait chin'd fellow, clean limb'd, and sweet, and dare promise as much as any Man.

Wood.

And perform as little as most Men; Well, just thus did my Husband promise before I had him, and now, though even in the Non age of our Marriage, nay before the Wedding Sheets were suf∣ficiently tumbled, I find him as reasonable a quiet Soul, as heart can wish.

aside

Court.

What i'st you consult on Widdow.

Wood.

In earnest Sir, I am past consideration, for I am resolv'd upon the matter.

Court.

Not to marry?

Wood.

By no means Sir, not you.

Court.

Why then the Devil take thee for making me loose so much of my pretious time, why thou Unmerciful, Insatiable Widdow, that art not only content, to let me miss of thee, but the opportunity of gaining at least a dozen hearts of perhaps handsomer Women then thy self Widdow.

Wood.

How Mr. Courtwell, handsomer! you are rude Sir, I must tell you.

Court.

Handsomer! Why thou didst not take thy self to be a Beauty sure! but yet thou hast charms Widdow in bank, which are alurements I confess, and 'twas well thou hadst 'em at these years.

Wood.

Years— Certainly I don't pass for a Sibel with you? this is beyond all patience, Clare, where's Mr. Easy?

Clare.

Taking a turn i'th Garden Madam.

Wood.

Let him come and carry off his scurvy Nephew here, or I shall set my Footman to do it in a more undecent manner: years quoth a'!

Court.

Fye on't, Age makes thee testy Widdow, ha, ha, ha.

Enter Easy.

Wood.

Oh intollerable Mr. Easy, do you bring your Kinsman to affront me?

Easy.

How Lady! Cocks bodikins, you mistake him 'tis the new way of making Love, he's a spark of the times Lady, and Courts A-la-mode.

VVood.

Mr. Easy I know you mean well, and for your Ladies sake, who is a vertuous Gentlewoman, you are always welcome to my House, your Kinsman too, I lookt upon as a proper Gentleman, and one that I was Redivable too, for the passion he profest to me, but now he has discover'd so disagreeable a quality, that really I am forc't to say I do not like his conversation, nor his address.

Easy.

Address Lady? I know not what you mean by address, but I am sure his Estate is worth a thousand pound per annum, and a better penny, and do you talk of his address?

Court.

Uncle say no more, leave her to her own peevish humour,

and the bare imagination of so likely a young fellow as my self. Widdow I am resolved to have thee my way, or no way, so adieu dear Widdow, I have other game in hand, beside, tolerated going to't, and so farewell Widdow.

Exit. Courtwell.

Easy.

Kinsman, come back I say.

VVood.

Sir, 'tis in vain, let him go, for I am resolv'd never to dis∣pose of my self that way, this is my final resolution.

Easy.

Is it so, then your Nephew, young Mr. Amorous, shall never have my Neece Grace, and that's my final resolution.

Exit. Easy.

Enter at the other door Mrs. Easy.

Mrs. Easy.

Sweet Mrs. Woodbee, your Servant, what looks are these that cloud your smiles to day! What's the matter Friend?

Wood.

Mrs. Easy I beg your pardon really, I did not see you, I have been so ill treated by some friends of yours —

Mrs. Easy.

Of mine! let me know who they are, and Ile secure you Ile own e'm to be no more so.

Wood.

On my Conscience thou wilt keep thy word, for 'twas thy most filthy Husband.

Mrs. Easy.

My Husband! Nay I believe it, for in good earnest Mrs. Woodbee, he is kind and civil to no body, nay, if you knew the daily, aye, and nightly torment too I have from him, you wou'd not wonder at his incivility to you.

Wood.

Nay, I believe indeed, you have very slender comfort of him, but alas, what can you expect from an old fusty fellow, that is even past the years of wishing well to our Sex—

Mrs. Easy.

You are in the right, Lord if I could but tell you the story of all my sufferings of that kind, but I ought not to complain, when there's no hopes left of remedy.

sighs.

Wood.

So, I hope I have an occasion to be reveng'd on this Hus∣band of hers, and help contrive his being made a Cuckold, Hang me, if I am not infinitely rais'd with the thoughts on't, ah sweet Venge∣ance! how I love thee!

(aside)

Come, I am no Woman if I don't fancy what thou'lt be at, nay, and 'tis but just and reasonable: 'Slife for Women of our youth, and all that, to languish away in sickly imagination; No, no, thou shalt

make use of what Nature has bestow'd on thee, so much Beauty to be buried alive, with an old rotten Carcass.—

Mrs. Easy.

What do you mean Madam?

Wood.

That, which thou mean'st. Come Friend I know thy Soul, thou shalt Cuckold this Fellow.

Mrs. Easy.

How! Cuckold my Husband, forbid it!

Wood.

Husband! Why what vertue is there in that Name, does the old Fool act like one? What duty of a Husband do you receive from him, ha?

Mrs. Easy.

That indeed is true. But —

Wood.

I know you Married him out of humour, because you were in Love with another Man, but that Man, you have never yet confest to me.

Mrs. Easy.

That shan't be long a secret, dear Friend, if this coun∣sel you give me, proceed from your real thoughts?

Wood.

So, let me thrive in the like success, when I have so great a provocation as thou hast, if I be not in earnest, I say agen enjoy thy self. I say be kind, be gay, and live for ever.

Mrs. Easy.

And be a Whore? I blush to name it!

Wood.

I see thou'rt willing, and I long to be reveng'd on the In∣solency of thy Husband.

(aside)

Why look ye Mrs. Easy? You may call your self what you please, but so long as you can keep your own Counsel, you are pure, and unstain'd in the eyes of all the World.

Mrs. Easy.

I confess, when I look upon Mr. Easy as a very useless Man to me, and how little Felicity I enjoy with him, I cannot scruple much at the thing propos'd. And therefore to be plain with you, I must own there is a Man, and such a Man —

Wood.

I such a Man, I like, forward —

Mrs. Easy.

'Tis the same that once made honourable Love to me, but he had no Fortune, and I, not much, which parted us; And he has since, (by what good fortune I know not) rais'd himself in the World, for he's full of Money, which, manag'd by a strange libera∣lity natural to him, is every day sacrific'd to me in Presents, and ma∣ny entertainments.

Wood.

Now thou speak'st as if thou understood'st thy self.

Mrs. Easy.

He is beside a Gentleman, young, and infinitely agreeable.

Wood.

'Slife thou'lt make me Rival thee.

Mrs. Easy.

He is extreamly solicitous for a meeting, I mean such a one, as may afford him, all I have to give.

Hides her face

Wood.

And hast thou the heart to refuse him this?

Mrs. Easy.

Conscience, Conscience, Madam!

Wood.

Away, with those silly thoughts, come, if thou bee'st cer∣tain of his Love, recompence it for shame.

Mrs. Easy.

I receiv'd a Letter from him this very Morning, and I vow, I need counsel how to answer it, for 'tis to meet him this Eve∣ning in St. Iame's Park—Here's the Letter.

Gives her the Letter.

Wood.

Before I read it, I protest you shall promise to meet him, nay, and as he desires too, or loose my Friendship for an unwitty Woman.

Mrs. Easy.

Well, you have prevail'd, Ile swear to you to follow your Counsel.

Wood.

Well said, now Ile see in what pleasing stile he writes.

Reads.

Madam, 'tis strange, that after so many Vows, and protestations, you should still remain an Infidel! Why is it? You will force me to some Extravagance that unbecomes a Man, and the secrecy of that Flame I have for you, to express my Soul in: For Loves sake, for mine, whom once you said, you lov'd, and more, for your own Honours sake, force me not into a stark madness that will undo us all.

I vow he writes most passionately, oh do not force him to any de∣spair, but be kind — Well, Ile read it out.

You have a Husband, and I have (Hell take e'm) other concerns too, that require my secret carrying on of this affair of Love. Therefore meet me this Night in St. James's Pel Mal, or expect to have me dead, or worse to morrow.

Yours Lovechange.

starts.

Ha! It cannot be! Lovechange! 'Tis Witchcraft, this, Lovechange, Hell! 'Tis not his hand, oh but I am too well assur'd it is—Let me disguise my Rage, and strive against Nature.

aside

Mrs. Easy.

Well, what think you of't Madam?

Wood.

I think all Men are false, and that Woman whose honour is trusted in their hands, a ruin'd thing.

Mrs. Easy.

Have you met with ought there that has wrought this

sudden change in you, if Women be not as false too, then how came you thus alter'd? Was it to get this secret of my Life from me, and then betray it? Bad Woman, farewell.

Offers to go.

W.

She must not go thus, nor must I discover,

[aside]

Mrs. Easy, come, be not angry with me, nor suspect me, your Letter only made me call to mind some former passages of my Life, In which I was betraid; 'Twas such another Man as this you have describ'd, and such a Let∣ter too, betray'd me, once, to ruine, but you may keep your word, for this perhaps is real.

[aside]

Ile counterplot you though.

Mrs. Easy.

If there be truth in Man, this cannot erre, and believe he speaks all truths to me.

Wood.

It may be so to you, but false to me, as thou art to thy Honour.

Aside.

Mrs. Easy.

Madam, Methinks I find a sudden alteration in you, I am sorry I have occasion'd it, pardon my ignorance.

Wood.

Indeed you have put a melancholly thought into me, but 'twil not last.

Mrs. Easy.

Ile take my leave, it may be you wou'd be alone, when you are dispos'd for't, Ile come and let you know my Adventure with Lovechange.

Wood.

Oh how she stabs me! as if she'd sound the mortal vein,

(aside)

your servant sweet Mrs. Easy, however you leave me now, I assure you the Relation of that Amorous adventure, will be very Cordial to me, as I shall order the matter—

Exit Mrs. Easy

Now Wit and Woman help me!

Enter Clare.

Clare.

Here's your Kinsman Mr. Amorous, Madam.

Wood.

Let him come in.

Enter Amorous.

How now Nephew, thou look'st ill upon't.

Amor.

As well as a successless Lover can do.

Wood.

What still whining after Mrs. Grace? Ile tell you Nephew, I'de rather thou should'st never marry, then be oblig'd to that old fool Easy for thy admittance.

Amor.

Madam, I was the most acceptable pretender, but I know not what Devil has possest him; For he comes into her Chamber just now, and finding me there, very full of choller, forbade me her presence, and his house, and told me what Treatment Mr. Courtwell

found from you, I should receive there for the future.

Wood.

He has done well, I tell thee, I hate him, take a secret which thou know'st not. This fellow being vastly rich, had got my good will to marry me, the day was assign'd, the things provided; Over night, he by chance saw a woman of something (as she, and he thought) a better Face, and married her. This, from my Pride, I do so stomach that I can never forgive.

Amor.

Yet, you seem to be very kind to the Lady, Madam?

Wood.

I do so, and will revenge the affront I warrant thee.

Amor.

But Madam, though you love not him, let not the Neece in your opinion inherit the crimes of the Uncle, give me leave to a∣dore her, for she's all sweet and innocent.

Wood.

I am not so ill natur'd, but I will say, that if without her Uncles leave you can gain her, (for I scorn thou should'st be a suitor to him for any thing) I give my consent, for besides my aversion to the old Man, I have a secret Reason not to marry Courtwell, which you shall know hereafter. I have some affairs of my own to dispatch before Night.

Amor.

Madam Ile follow your directions in all things.

Wood.

Cousin, I had forgot to tell you, that there is a young Man, a Person of Quality, arriv'd from Spain, from your Uncle there, he has made my house his home, and pray treat him kindly.

Amor.

I shall obey you Madam.

Exeunt Woodbee, and Amorous severally.

Enter Mrs. Easy, and Peg.

Peg.

I am very glad Madam, that you are at last resolv'd to oblige Mr. Lovechange, Ile swear he's almost wild for your answer.

Mrs. Easy.

When will he call for't?

Peg.

Madam, he's walking here hard by, or will be immediately, have you writ?

Mrs. Easy.

No, but you may let him know my mind, that is, that I will be in the Mall, as soon as it begins to be dark, if I can get from my Husband.

Peg.

Oh Lord Madam! Now I think on't, we look for Sir Ralph Spatter to night, Mrs. Graces Sweet-heart, and my Master designs to make a Masquerade as they call it, on purpose to entertain him.

Mrs. Easy.

That's true, some way must be contriv'd to cheat him

of my Company. For Peg, now I have resolv'd upon't, I cannot for∣bear going, had my Husband been any thing approaching to Man, I shou'd have believ'd I had long'd, so great is my desire of seeing Love∣change to night. Oh, this dear Letter has so powerful an attraction, that I must go.

Kisses the Letter.

Peg.

Some way we'l find out. O dear Madam, here's my Master in Rancour, for I had forgot to tell you forsooth, that he has forbid Mr. Amorous the house, and that Mrs. Grace is full of dolour.

Enter Mr. Easy, snatches the Letter out of Mrs. Easy's hand.

Mr. Easy.

What's this I pray?

Mrs. Easy.

I am undone! Nay I protest you must not see't for the World, it is a new Song.

Mr. Easy.

Some bawdy Lampoon, Ile warrant ye, Ile see't.

Mrs. Easy.

Ile protest it is not Sir, when 'tis set you shall hear it sung.

Enter Grace weeping.

She's come in very good time. Alas! poor Cousin Grace, and have you Sir, can you be so cruel to Cousin Grace, pray let her have the Man she loves.— Peg, hast never a Song to change this for?

Aside.

Peg.

Yes, Madam, but 'tis a very scurvy one.

Mr. Easy.

I say Ile see the Paper.

Mrs. Easy.

Any thing dear Peg, but the Letter,

Aside

come Dear will you consider Graece?

Mr. Easy.

The Verses I say, I smell a Plot, 'tis some Love Letter, come, come, produce, produce.

Mrs. Easy.

I vow Dear I am asham'd you shou'd see e'm, they are so very silly.

Peg.

I Sir, and something—

Mr. Easy.

Bawdy too, Ile warrant ye, let's see, let's see.

Peg.

Truly Sir, my Mistress has not read e'm yet.

Mr. Easy.

What's here, Sig— Sig, Signior— hey day, what's the Devil got amongst you two: I shall Signior ye, and you want a Signior.

Mrs. Easy.

What say you concerning Grace Sir?

Mr. Easy.

I say you are all naught, and 'tis time you had all Men, lusty Men, able Men, for the Devil will supply their places else, and therefore I design to morrow, to marry Grace to a young lusty Lad, and a Knight, de ye see a Knight.

Grace.

How Sir, marry me, and not to Mr. Amorous?

Mr. Easy.

Amorous! Let me but see thee peep through the Win∣dow upon Amorous agen, and Ile make a Nun of thee, dost hear, where thou shalt languish with the thought of flesh, and every day shall be a Good-Friday to thee.

Grace.

You will not be so inhumane, will you Sir? you have the liberty to chuse Youth and Beauty here in my Aunt, and despis'd Riches as the most unvaluable thing; and can you believe I am so unlike you to chuse Wealth and an empty Title before so much Worth as dwells in Mr. Amorous.

Mr. Easy.

If I have play'd the Fool, I do not mean you shall do so too. I have a Wife indeed of Youth and Beauty, but had I known the continual Plague of keeping her honest, she shou'd e'n have been left to her old Gallant Lovechange, perhaps his Youth without my Money, had made her take the same courses, that my Money, and no Youth does, but I have rid my hands of him, thanks be prais'd.

Mrs. Easy.

This is unkind Mr. Easy to upbraid me with so innocent a kindness as I had for Mr. Lovechange.

Mr. Easy.

Nay, now I dare swear for thee, but yet I cannot help fearing, for Sweetheart he is very much spruc'd up of late, that is, since you were married, goes Rich, and spends high; notable signs, that some old Fool, or other may have a handsome liberal Wife, but thou art truly honest. Well, we do every moment expect Sir Ralph Spatter, pray let there be musick got, and let the young Folks dance, invite Mrs. Lay-it-on, and Mrs. Frisker, and who else you please, and their Husbands, and entertain his Worship after the London fashion, Ile have it handsome.

Grace.

Madam, i'me undone if your goodness don't assist me.

Mrs. Easy.

Fear not, Ile warrant we'l take some care, I know too well the torment of forc'd Marriages to wish thee that punishment, but Cousin, pray do you see all things got in order to night, for I have a visit, or two, to make of concern.

Grace.

Madam, you shall command me.

Exit Mrs. Easy.

Enter Servant.

Ser.

Sir, here's a Gentleman inquires for you.

Mr. Easy.

Bodikins, 'tis Sir Ralph, bring him in.

Ser.

I believe it is Sir.

Exit Servant.

Enter Sir Ralph and Boy.

Sir Ralph.

Sirrah, go you and look out Mr. Lovechange, and let him know I am come to Town, and shall have need of that small sum of money he owes me.

Exit Boy.

Mr. Easy.

Sir Ralph, I am yours, and heartily glad to see you.

Sir Lalph.

Sir, I am as much yours, and as glad to see you, and so I am to see you forsooth.

To Mrs. Grace.

Grace.

'Tis more then I am to see you, Ile promise ye.

Sir Ralph.

Oh cry ye mercy, then you are not the Lady I took you for, I thought you had been Mrs. Grace my Mistress?

Mr. Easy.

That's her name Sir, and her quality.

Sir Ralph.

Truly Uncle, that must be, if she have no better, you are much too blame for giving her no better education, I thought she wou'd have receiv'd me with open arms, for though I say it, I deserve it, and understand breeding.

Grace.

I doubt it Sir.

Sir Ralph.

You can't oblige me more, then to question my ability, for then you give me occasion to show my parts, and first as touching the Art of Courtship, though I don't read Romances, Plays, Histo∣ries, Pastoralls, or Farces, yet can accost a Lady after this sort — Madam, (with my Face scru'd up thus) I am your proud Servitor, or in English proud to serve you, my hands beneath your feet, is too mean a sacrifice; go where you will, I am your shadow, advance but the standard of your eyes, and i'm your Captive, your Creature, your very Frogg, begot, by your gentle influence. P'shaw I am fur∣nish'd with a thousand things of the like nature.

Mr. Easy.

Rare, rare, I vow, ah Sir Ralph, were I a young Wench for your sake, I cou'd hug you, and love you all over.

Grace.

Pray do so for me Sir, for I find no one part of him to move me to't.

Betty.

Madam, if I were you, I wou'd dissemble with him a little.

Grace.

I had as good do so indeed Betty.

Mr. Easy.

A little time, will make her plyable.

Sir Ralph.

P'shaw, I don't question that mun, what do you think Mrs. Grace?

Grace.

Sir, I hope time will convince me of my errour, and let me see, that you have perfections, which are yet disguis'd.

Sir Ralph.

I thank you Mrs. Grace, for your good opinion of me I vow, and shall I hope do well against to morrow.

Grace.

'Twere unkind Sir, to forbid your hope.

Sir Ralph.

Well then, Ile set my seal upon you, in sign and token that you are my own.

kisses her.

Mr. Easy.

Go, now Grace, you may withdraw, get things in a readiness against night.

Grace.

I obey you Sir.

Exit Grace.

Sir Ralph.

Sir, I must crave your excuse for a few moments, I am going to call in a little Money, an ill office to play the Dun, but you know Sir, we Lovers that have peevish Mistresses to deal with, re∣quire more than bare Courtship, well adieu Sir.

Exit Sir Ralph one way, Mr. Easy the other.

Enter Lovechange solus.

Lov.

This is my constant walk three times a day, pray Heaven the Neighbourhood don't take me for some walking spright, that upon certain hours, comes to give some intelligence of hid trea∣sure.

Enter Peg.

But here's Peg, now dear Soul, what answer dost bring me? Shall I see my Mistress? Shall I be happy this night?

Peg.

I know not how happy 'twill make you, but she will be this night in the Mall, at the upper end.

Lov.

Dear Maid, Ile owe thee the Indies for this.

Peg.

I Sir, if you did but know, what shift my Mistress makes, you wou'd think your self oblig'd and indebted too I can assure you.

Lov.

No more, here's an earnest of what I owe thee, prithee give her my service, my Love, my Heart, and Soul, honest Peg.

Enter Sir Ralph.

Peg.

Oh lass, what shall I do, here comes Sir Ralph Spatter, Mrs. Graces Sweet-heart; who by no means must see me.

Lov.

Why I hope he's no Rival.

Peg.

No Sir, but he may hereafter know me, for he's a Suitor to Mrs. Grace.

Lov.

Leave me then, for I have a message from him, and will take this opportunity to speak to him.

Exit Peg.

Sir Ralph.

Mr. Lovechange your Servant, I sent to you just now, and a•• glad to meet you, you know my business Sir.

Lov.

Yes Sir, I know you pretend I owe you a thousand pounds but I am not provided with such a sum at present.

Sir Ralph.

Sir, I shou'd not have given you this trouble now, and at so short warning, but that I am upon my marriage, and there are a thousand Perquisits, and Trangams requir'd, in order to the gaining my Mistress.

Lov.

Save your money Sir Ralph, save your money, for this is no time to present idle Women, they are vain enough of themselves, do not raise them.

Sir Ralph.

I, but Sir, we that are Lovers, must do these idle foolish things, or loose those more foolish idle things call'd Women.

Lov.

If all Lovers, are to walk by one Rule, then Sir I am in the same predicament with you.

Sir Ralph.

Why, are you going to marry too?

Lov.

Faith, no Sir, I thank my Stars, but I am as much in Love, as those that are.

Sir Ralph.

Well Sir, I am a little in haste now, pray think of the Debt, your Servant Sir.

Exit Sir Ralph.

Lov.

Pox of that foolish noddle of his, to believe i'le ever pay that Debt, which I was trappan'd into, by the old Rogue his Fathers cunning? as long as I have a Woman in my eye, no, no, my designs can't be carried on with empty Pockets.

Enter a Porter with a Letter.

Porter.

I think Sir, your name is Mr. Lovechange.

Lov.

The same— From whom, this?

Porter.

The Contents will inform you.

Lov.

Reads.

Dear Lovechange for some reasons that I must tell you, I have thought fit to alter my design of meeting you in the Mall, but will wait your coming at the side of the Duck-pond under those Trees, on the Bank.

I like the Resolution well, tell the Person from whom you come, I will not fail to be at the place appointed.

Exeunt severally.

The End of the First Act.