Satyrical essayes characters and others. Or Accurate and quick descriptions, fitted to the life of their subiects. Iohn Stephens

CHARACT. IX. An Humorist

IS the shadow of Vnderstanding, the traitor to Reason, or the vani∣ty of a better man: Bloud-letting, a good whip, honest company, or reasonable instructions might (at the first) recouer him. But if he continues among laughing spirits one quarter, the disease will grow inward, and then the cure growes desperate. If his humour bee hereditary, hee is more familiar with it, and makes it the principall vertue of his family: If imitation breedes a habite, hee makes it the pledge

of sworne brother-hood, or at least the fauour of new acquain∣tance: he neuer is infected sin∣gle, or with one onely; for either he is now admitted to the seue∣rall orders; or hee is prompt enough to subscribe generally when occasion peeps. You must not dare to discommend, or call in question, his behauiour seri∣ously with his companions; for thogh you cannot cal the humor lawfull, it is sufficient if you can cal it his humor. You may iustly forbeare to restraine him; for if he be truely adopted, he thinkes it an especiall part to be respect∣lesse. Tobacco is a good whet∣stone for his property; hee doth seldome therefore forget to pro∣uoke his constitution this way: & (by being insatiate) he knowes well his humor may escape the search of reason, by vertue of the

mist. He hath from his cradle bin swadled vp, with much obstinate and peremptory affectation: It being indeed cōmonly the cha∣racter of his ripest age, to sup∣port that freely in his man-hood, which was forbidden in the spark of his minority: hee neuer slips opportunity with deliberation; hee is therefore prompt enough to begin; and the reason of his act is enough, though onely that he hath begun, because humor is the motiue. There is nothing within the compasse of thought so triuiall, so absurd, and mon∣strous, which his vanity will not auerre to be ponderous, decent, and naturall. Neither will he ab∣hor to iustifie them by his owne practise, against all opposers. He trauailes vp and downe like Tom of Bedlem, vnder the title of mad Rascall, Witty Rogue, or Notable

mad sla••e, and these attributes be a more effectuall oratory to ap∣plaud his humour, then a direct cōmendation. He will not some∣times (vpō smal discontinuance) vouchsafe to acknowledge, or (at least) know, his familiar friends, without much impertinence and Interrogatories of their name, or habitation; whilst another time, hee dares aduenture his know∣ledge, & salutations vpon meere aliens. Hee is very much distra∣cted, and yet I wonder how the frenzy should be dangerous; for he neuer breaks his braine about the study of reason or inuention: seeing his humour is the priui∣ledge of both: It is therfore suffi∣ciēt for him to be extreme melā∣choly, & be most ignorant of the cause or obiect; and suddenly to be vnmeasurably frolick without prouocation: whilst hee is onely

beholding to a brainlesse tempe∣rature in discharge of his cre∣dit. He will converse freely with Serving-men & Souldiers with∣in 12. houres; & presently when the ague hath once seized him, he proues tyrannicall and inso∣lent towards the silly vermin. He never brake a vow in his whole life, or brake vowes continually: for either they haue not suted with his variety, to be intended, or hee hath intended to obserue them no longer then might a∣gree with his body, which ebbes and flowes. When hee growes old, and past voyce, he learns for∣raigne languages: as if, when he had dined, hee should devoure the sauce. In a word, he is a chiefe commander of actions, but no command••r of himselfe; being in his best brauery but a Turkish Slaue, ever subiect to desire

and appetite: according to their paterne, hee is himselfe to him∣selfe praise-worthy, or elegant; but to worthinesse it selfe, odi∣ous.