King Copethua's Wife, Chapters XIII-XIV [pp. 292-299]

King Cophetua's Wife.
that go to make up the charming whole, and
yet quite unable to say wherein the charm lies.
I had stood looking out of a window for
a few moments before the soft portiere was
pushed back with the musical sound of silver rings striking against each other, and
Madge came to greet me. She had a peculiarly sweet smile in those days-a smile that
had a pathos in it, quite unlike the merry,
girlish smile with which she met me first at
Ellenwood.
"'I think you always come to me when I
need you most," she said by way of salutation, and with her hand in mine. "I have
been restless all the morning, and everything jars upon me. Books have exasperating endings, poems are full of false
rhymes and overstrained sentiment, my
piano has a note out of tune, and my voice
is harsh to-day. Altogether, I am simply
unhappy, and you have come, as you always
do, just when I need you."
' Then let us pray that I may leave you
in a happier and more restful condition," I
answered half-banteringly. "And I think
that it may be we can do no better than to
lay our tribute on the altar of this'Praying
Boy.' Perhaps his outstretched arms raised
toward the sun will bring our petitions near
to light and fulfillment." And as I spoke I
put the bowl of flowers upon the pedestal
of the statue.
"It may be the wisest way." She took my
attempt at lightness seriously enough. "I
think we all like to stand off and leave insensate things to do our praying for us; but,
do you know, I have been wishing lately
that I could believe I had a patron saint, and
pray to him or her. I think my prayers, in
the multitude that are going up to God from
broken hearts, must seem so very small and
pitiful to him. It would be a happy thought
that some one stood ready to bear my petitions straight to the Master, some one at
favor in court who might look direct upon
the face of the king."
"Why, Madge, my friend, what is the trouble to-day? You have been so brave, so
steadfast in your course hitherto: are you
giving way now? Is it anything new?"
"No, nothing new. I think nothing that
is new can ever come to me now. I seem
to have lived through every phase of existence, to have endured and enjoyed all
that one possibly could endure or enjoy,
and the only new experience for me could
be death. Yet even that I have been
through with, for death is only a dissolution
of hopes and fears, and"-after a pause-"I
have neither now."
"But your music: surely you appreciate
your success before the world; your fame is
something to you, is it not? I stood at the
back of the hall while you sang last night,
and to me your face seemed lighted up as
though you had reached some inner temple
of life's sanctuary, and found peace and happiness there."
"Ah, last night! While I was singing one
of the arias in the Oratorio the audience
melted away from before me, and I seemed
to be standing on tip-toe, and singing right
into the ear of God. I had lost all thought
of myself, and so of course I was happy and
content. But when, as to-day, I am conscious of myself-of all my ills and uncomfortablenesses-I grow so restless, so distrustful, that I am unfit for anything. Why"and she rose and stood before me-"why
am I not constituted like other women? I
know many a soft-voiced, pure-eyed woman
who, if she had one-tenth my anguish, would
drown it by the morphine powders of excitement. Look at these letters. Here are invitations to private dinners, assurances of
ardent devotion, perfumed sentences of love
all the tricks of insult that men know so
well how to direct against a defenseless and
suffering woman. How many, how many of
the woman friends you and your wife pos sess would let these go unnoticed, and not
seek to forget, in the poor delirium they
offer, the pangs and distress of the sickness
that is upon them? Do not speak: you can
say nothing to calm me; let me say out that
which is within my heart to say.
"I have not spoken of my husband since
you came home from Europe. Do you
think it has been because he is not in my
thoughts? I have lain down at night with
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