more God-ward, and Christ-ward upon the least breathing: But alas! Now the spirit breaths, and blows strongly, and the soul is slug∣gish. It riseth to go it may be, but with that un∣willing, willingnesse, and it strives to act, but with that dead livelinesse, that surely it thinkes all its strength is gone, and that it is but in vain to doe any thing, &c. and this casts it downe. Or
5 Want of former incomes in duties do de∣ject some. Alas cry dejected souls! we doe as much as ever, but we want much of our incomes. Time was, I could hardly lisp but God heard; and now I pray often, and no returne at all. Job he cryes out: Oh that it were as in the months passed: as in the dayes when God preserved me: when his candle shined upon my head; and when by his light I walked through darkenesse, Job: 29.2, 3. Oh saith the soule! I pray, read, hear, meditate, confer, communicate, &c. as much, if not more then formerly; and yet I injoy lesse. What shall, or can I say to this? what, to sow much, and reape but little: To eate, and not to eate enough; to drinke, and not to be filled; to earne wages, and not to put it into the bag, (so the soule alludes unto that Hag. 1.6.) is not this strange? Sure I may well be disquieted, who fish all night and catch nothing, who act much, and have but little, or no income. Time was, when the spirit blew, and my spices flow∣ed. Time was, when the King sat at his table, and my spiknard smelt: Time was, when the fa∣ther▪ smiled, the son imbraced, and the spirit