Tom, Thins Ghost
IN dead of night when the pale Moon
Had got to th' Nocturnall Noon
Betwixt her Light, and what was lent
From twinkling Candle almost spent,
As I lay slumbering on my Bed
I saw methought a man was dead,
Gravely he stalk't and stood and star'd
While I lay trembling and was Scarr'd
Dumb for a while at last I broke
Silence and to the Phantosm spoke,
Art thou said I that man of Sin
Or Ghost of Thomas late Squire T.
He soon reply'd with Accents hollow
In words conform to these that follow.
From the Tartarean shades below
That neither Bounds nor bottom know
Where a new life, the Cursed gain,
Throw constant Torments, Endles pain,
I by permission come to tell
What Goverment there is in Hell,
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Because I know thou wert a Tory
To thee I chose t' impart my story,
For thou wil't Joyfully reveal
What, Whiggs that long for, Common-weal
Like Spartan Boyes, wou'd still conceal.
Attend then and my Narrative
Communicate to all alive,
I am the Soul of one of those
That both the K— and Law oppose
And Itch' with Conscientious Scurvey
To turn the Kingdom topsey Turvey,
Rogues that presume themselves appointed
To contradict the Lords Anointed,
Those that wou'd murder an Addressor
And cut the Legs of true Successor.
And make him look in piteous Case
As Withrington in Chivy Chase,
Nay cut his Throte and in his place
Set Perking up of Extract base,
Who has no more pretence to Rule
This Land, than any other Fool,
But may make out Il'e Swear as soon
A Title to the World ith' Moon,
I was I say of that Caball
Till I was murder'd in the Mall;
You've heard I know of that Barbarity
Hatefull beyond all Bonds of Charity.
Proceed we then with our Relation
Of Action in th' Infernal Nation,
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Assist me steed of Phaebus Legion
VVhilst I describe the dolefull Region,
One Monarch in that VVorld controuls
VVith flameing Scepter, tortur'd Souls,
And Captive, tho he be in Chains,
Yet absolute Emperour he Reigns.
No Factions there disturb the State
VVhich is preserv'd by steady fate,
Unalterable Laws they have
VVhich the Almighty God-head gave,
And to their Prince ev'n on his Foes
A strict Obedience does Impose.
That Prince is Lucifer, whose power
The Subject Ghosts adore Each hour,
VVho to advance their mighty King
In Blasphemies, his praises sing
Devoutly swearing there's no odds
Betwix this Grandeur and the Gods,
These tho' they suffer 'tis in Vain
Amid'st their Torments to complain,
If he but nod from burning Throne
There's not a Soul that dares to groan,
For Hell admitts of no Petition
To redress Grievance of condition,
Nor do Tumultuous Crowds appear
VVith bold Remonstrances of Fear,
Nor Spirit Murmer at oppression
Nor prate of right or wrong Succession,
Their King Immortall, Oh! 'mong you,
That Charles the Second were so too.
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I love him now, and tho' a Devil
Am much more honest grown and Civil,
For having ta'ne a Drachm of Styx
I have forgot my VVhiggish Tricks
Next to the Prince there are that stand
Awfully waiting his Command
Belzebub, Moloch, Ashteroth, Baal,
And Dagon, who before their fall
Tho' not condemn'd t' Eternall Night
VVhere Seraphins and sons of Light.
Those cursed Peers when e're he will
If he intends great woe or Ill
To sons of Earth he quickly can
Summon into his Dark divan,
Not to give Counsell, but to do
VVhat his Dire Dictates Prompts him to.
You have like him, one Noble Peer
VVho wou'd do mighty Service there
VVou'd he were there in stead of me
To shew his Squinting Policy.
He 'tis I mean that looks at once
Like Cerberus from tipple Sconce
But that his Eyes wou'd fascinate
And give a destiny to Fate;
For he I fear wou'd break the Law
By which this world is kept in awe,
Since it is here his chiefest Care
To break all Laws that Penall are,
He wou'd go nigh ev'n in this station
To make a new Association.
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But if he did, Oh! There are Judges,
In stead of Scarlet Cloth with Budges
Not such as these in which we trade
But Robes of Solid Darkness made,
They'd firk his Toby for take this
For fatal truth, (and so it is)
In the proceedings against furies
There are no Ignoramus Juries,
Plain Evidence is there believ'd
And no convicted Soul repriev'd.
No Mainprize there allow'd nor Bail
But doomn'd to an Eternal Jayl,
The restless Prisoners howl, and cry
Whilst they in burning Shackles fry,
Yet in my Conscience hee'd Endeavour
Eev'n to deceive the great Deceiver,
Or wou'd pretend to Court for Mistress
The fatallest oth' Fatal Sisters,
And wou'd so wheedle her that shee
Shou'd cut the thread of Monarchy,
So wou'd he his dear wish obtain
And put an end to Charles his Reign,
Nor wou'd he value his Damnation
To keep great James from Kingly Station,
Here upon Earth he has a Pug
Which he like Devil & Witch does hug,
For he ne're found his words were true in
Any one thing but his own Ruin,
He Whilom told the Yonker he
Shou'd sway the British Monarchy,
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Of a known Bastard grown a Prince
But poor deluded Perkin since,
From fancy'd Honour is degraded
And all his Flowerde-lysses faded.
But I degress from my Design
While things on Earth, and Hell I joyn,
Suffer me then to represent
The Methods of our Parliament.
VVhen Lucifer to utmost borders
Of Erebus sends out his Orders,
His Officers make no delay
But the great Summons soon obey,
Unanimously they all Elect,
Not such as say they will protect,
The Common Peoples Liberty
From their dread Soveraigns Tyranny,
For none his boundless Power Questions
Or make undutiful Suggestions.
But such they are as when th' assemble
Before his Footstool bow and tremble,
They come with steadfast Resolutions
To assert the fatal Constitutions,
Nor do they once Capitulate
Or grumble to maintain the State
All that they have to him they owe
Mammon besides is his they know,
There is no Sawcy well clad Clown
That claims the use of what's his own,
Nor can from Hellish mouth such sin come
As to deny him his own Income.
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There no Abhorror on their Knees,
Pay Topham's Arbitrary Fees.
Nor bawling Lawyers Speakers make
Which only with the Vulgar take.
But hark! I hear the Midnight Bell,
And that rings my Departing Knel.
What I have said pray con it or'e,
Next time we meet Ile tell thee more.