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AS I have leisure enough, so I have cause more than enough to meditate upon, and prepare for my Death; for I know there are but few steps between the Prisons and Graves of Princes.
It is God's indulgence which gives Me the space, but Mans Cruelty that gives Me the sad occasions for these thoughts.
For, besides the common burthen of Morta∣lity, which lies upon Me as a Man, I now bear the heavy load of other mens Ambitions, Fears, Jealousies, and cruel Passions, whose Envy or Enmity against Me makes their own lives seem deadly to them, while I enjoy any part of Mine.
I thank God, my Prosperity made Me not wholly a stranger to the contemplations of Mor∣tality: Those are never unseasonabble, since this is alwayes uncertain: Death being an Eclipse which oft happeneth as well in clear as cloudy dayes.
But my now long and sharp Adversity hath so reconciled in Me those natural Antipathies be∣tween Life and Death which are in all men, that, I thank God, the common terrours of it are dis∣pelled, and the special horrour of it as to My particular much allayed: for although my Death at present may justly be represented to Me with all those terrible aggravations which the policy of Cruel and Implacable enemies can put upon it (affairs being drawn to the very dregs of Malice;) yet, I bless God, I can look upon all those stings as unpoisonous, though sharp, since my Redeemer hath either pulled them out, or given Me the Antidote of his Death against them; which as to the Immatu∣rity, Unjustice, Shame, Scorn and Cruelty of it, exceeded whatever I can fear.
Indeed, I never did find so much the Life of Religion, the Feast of a good Conscience, and the brazen wall of a judicious Integrity and Constancy, as since I came to these closer con∣flicts with the thoughts of Death.
I am not so old as to be weary of Life; nor (I hope) so bad as to be either afraid to dye, or ashamed to live: true, I am so afflicted, as might make Me sometime even desire to dye; if I did not consider, that it is the greatest glo∣ry of a Christians life to dye daily, in conquer∣ing, by a lively Faith and patient Hopes of a better life, those partial and quotidian deaths which kill us (as it were) by piece-meals, and make us overlive our own fates; while we are deprived of Health, Honour, Liberty, Power, Credit, Safety or Estate, and those other Com∣forts of dearest Relations, which are as the Life of our lives.
Though, as a KING, I think My self to live in nothing temporal so much as in the Love and good will of my People; for which as I have suffered many deaths, so I hope I am not in that point as yet wholly dead: notwithstand∣ing my Enemies have used all the poison of Fal∣sity and violence of Hostility to destroy, first the Love and Loyalty which is in my Subjects, and then all that content of Life in Me which from these I chiefly enjoyed.
Indeed, they have left Me but little of Life, and only the husk and shell (as it were) which their further Malice and Cruelty can take from Me; having bereaved Me of all those worldly Comforts for which Life it self seems desirable to men.
But, O my Soul, think not that Life too long or tedious wherein God gives Thee any oppor∣tunities, if not to do, yet to suffer with such Christian Patience and Magnanimity in a good Cause, as are the greatest Honour of our Lives, and the best improvement of our Deaths.
I know that in point of true Christian Va∣lour it argues Pusillanimity to desire to dye out of weariness of life, and a want of that heroick greatness of spirit which becomes a Christian, in the patient and generous sustaining those Affli∣ctions which as shadows necessarily attend us while we are in this Body, and which are les∣sened or enlarged as the Sun of our Prosperity moves higher or lower; whose total absence is best recompenced with the dew of Heaven.
The assaults of Affliction may be terrible, like Sampson's Lion, but they yield much sweetness to those that dare to encounter and overcome them; who know how to overlive the wither∣ings of their Gourds without discontent or pee∣vishness, while they may yet converse with God.
That I must dye as a Man is certain: that I may dye a King by the hands of my own Sub∣jects, a violent, sudden and barbarous death, in the strength of my years, in the midst of my Kingdoms, my Friends and loving Subjects be∣ing helpless Spectators, my Enemies insolent Re∣vilers and Triumphers over Me, living, dying, and dead, is so probable in humane reason, that God hath taught Me not to hope otherwise as to mans Cruelty; however I despair not of God's infinite Mercy.
I know my Life is the object of the Devils and Wicked mens Malice; but yet under God's sole custody and disposal: whom I do not think to flatter for longer Life, by seeming prepared to die; but I humbly desire to depend upon him, and to submit to his will both in life and death, in what order soever he is pleased to lay them out to Me.
I confess it is not easie for Me to contend with those many horrors of Death wherewith God suffers Me to be tempted; which are equally horrid either in the suddenness of a barbarous Assassination, or in those greater formalities whereby my Enemies (being more solemnly cruel) will, it may be, seek to add (as those did who crucified Christ) the Mockery of Justice to the Cruelty of Malice. That I may be destroy∣ed, as with greater Pomp and Artifice, so with
less Pity, it will be but a necessary policy, to make my Death appear as an act of Justice done by Subjects upon their Soveraign; who know that no Law of God or Man invests them with any power of Judicature without Me, much less against Me; and who, being sworn and bound by all that is Sacred before God and Man to en∣deavour my Preservation, must pretend Justice to cover their Perjury.
It is, indeed, a sad fate for any man to have his Enemies to be his Accusers, Parties and Judges; but most desperate, when this is acted by the insolence of Subjects against their Sove∣raign; wherein those who have had the chief∣est hand, and are most guilty of contriving the publick Troubles, must by shedding My Blood seem to wash their own hands of that innocent blood whereof they are now most evidently guilty before God and Man, and, I believe, in their own Consciences too; while they carried on unreasonable demands, first by Tumults, af∣ter by Armies. Nothing makes mean spirits more cowardly-cruel in managing their usurped Power against their lawfull Superious than this, the Guilt of their unjust Ʋsurpation; notwith∣standing those specious and popular pretensions of Justice against Delinquents, applyed only to disguise at first the monstrousness of their designs, who despaired, indeed, of possessing the power and profits of the Vineyard, till the Heir, whose right it is, be cast out and slain.
With them my greatest Fault must be, that I would not either destroy My self, with the Church and State, by my Word, or not suffer them to do it unresisted by the Sword; whose covetous Ambition no Concessions of Mine could ever yet either satisfie or abate.
Nor is it likely they will ever think that King∣dom of Brambles, which some men seek to erect (at once, weak, sharp, and fruitless either to God or Man) is like to thrive, till watered with the Royal Blood of those whose right the King∣dom is.
Well, God's will be done; I doubt not bu•• my Innocency will find him both my Protector and my Advocate, who is my only Judge, whom I own as King of Kings; not only for the emi∣nency of His Power and Majesty above them, but also for that singular Care and Protection which he hath over them; who knows them to be exposed to as many Dangers (being the great∣est Patrons of Law, Justice, Order, and Religion on Earth) as there be either Men or Devils which love Confusion.
Nor will he suffer those men long to prosper in their Babel, who build it with the Bones, and cement it with the Blood of their KINGS.
I am confident they will find Avengers of my
Death among themselves: the Injuries I have sustained from them, shall be first punished by them, who agreed in nothing so much as in op∣posing Me.
Their impatience to bear the loud cry of my Blood, shall make them think no way better to expiate 〈◊〉〈◊〉 than by shedding theirs who with them most thirsted after Mine.
The sad Confusions following my Destruction are already presaged and confirmed to Me by those I have lived to see since my Troubles, in which God alone (who only could) hath many wayes pleaded my Cause; not sustering them to go unpunished whose Confederacy in Sin was their only Security; who have cause to fear that God will both further divide, and by murual Vengeance afterward destroy them.
My greatest conquest of Death is from the Power and Love of Christ, who hath swallow'd up Death in the Victory of his Resurrection and the glory of his Ascension.
My next Comfort is, that he gives Me not only the honour to imitate his Example in suf∣fering for Righteousness sake, (though obscured by the foulest charges of Tyranny and Injustice) but also that Charity, which is the noblest Re∣venge upon and Victory over my Destroy∣ers; by which, I thank God, I can both forgive
them, and pray for them, that God would not impute my Blood to them, further than to con∣vince them what need they have of Christs Blood to wash their Souls from the guilt of shedding Mine.
At present, the Will of my Enemies seems to be their only rule, their Power the measure, and their Success the exactor of what they please to call Justice; while they flatter themselves with the fancy of their own Safety by My Danger, and the security of their Lives and Designs by My Death: forgetting, that as the greatest tem∣ptations to Sin are wrapped up in seeming Pro∣sperities, so the severest Vengeances of God are then most accomplished when men are suffered to compleat their wicked purposer.
I bless God, I pray not so much that this bit∣ter cup of a Violent Death may pass from Me, as that of his Wrath may pass from all those whose hands by deserting me are sprinkled, or by acting and consenting to my Death are em∣brued with my Blood.
The Will of God hath confined and conclu∣ded Mine; I shall have the pleasure of dying, without any pleasure of desired Vengeance.
This I think becomes a Christian toward his Enemies, and a King toward his Subjects.
They cannot deprive Me of more than I am content to lose, when God sees fit by their hands to take it from Me; whose Mercy, I believe, will more than infinitely recompence whatever by Mans Injustice he is pleased to deprive me of.
The Glory attending my Death will far sur∣pass all I could enjoy or conceive in Life.
I shall not want the heavy and envied Crowns of this world, when my God hath mercifully crowned and consummated his Graces with Glo∣ry, and exchanged the shadows of my Earthly Kingdoms among men, for the substance of that Heavenly Kingdom with Himself.
For the censures of the world, I know the sharp and necessary Tyranny of my Destroyers will sufficiently confute the Calumnies of Ty∣ranny against Me: I am perswaded I am happy in the judicious Love of the ablest and best of my Subjects, who do not only pity and pray for Me, but would be content even to die with Me or for Me.
These know how to excuse my Failings as a Man, and yet to retain and pay their Duty to Me as their KING; there being no Religious necessity binding any Subjects, by pretending to punish, infinitely to exceed the faults and errours of their Princes, especially there where
more than sufficient Satisfaction hath been made to the publick; the enjoyment of which pri∣vate Ambitions have hitherto frustrated.
Others, I believe, of softer tempers, and less advantaged by my Ruine, do already feel sharp Convictions, and some remorse in their Con∣sciences; where they cannot but see the propor∣tions of their evil dealings against Me in the measure of God's retaliations upon them, who cannot hope long to enjoy their own thumbs and toes, having under pretence of paring o∣thers nails been so cruel as to cut off their chief∣est strength.
The punishment of the more insolent and ob∣stinate may be like that of Korah and his Com∣plices (at once mutining against both Prince and Priest) in such a method of Divine Justice as is not ordinary; the Earth of the lowest and mean∣est People opening upon them, and swallowing them up in a just disdain of their ill-gotten and worse-used Authority, upon whose support and strength they chiefly depended for their build∣ing and establishing their Designs against Me, the Church, and State.
My chiefest comfort in Death consists in my Peace which, I trust, is made with God; before whose exact Tribunal I shall not fear to appear as to the Cause so long disputed by the Sword between Me and my causless Enemies: where I
doubt not but his Righteous Judgement will confute their Fallacy, who from worldly Success (rather like Sophisters than sound Christians) draw those popular Conclusions for God's Ap∣probation of their actions; whose wise Provi∣dence (we know) oft permits many events which his revealed Word (the only clear, safe and fix∣ed Rule of good Actions and good Consciences) in no sort approves.
I am confident, the Justice of my Cause and Clearness of my Conscience before God and to∣ward my People will carry Me as much above them in God's decision, as their Successes have lifted them above Me in the Vulgar Opinion: who consider not that many times those under∣takings of men are lifted up to Heaven in the prosperity and applause of the world, whose rise is from Hell as to the Injuriousness and Op∣pression of the Design. The prosperous winds which oft fill the sails of Pirats, do not justifie their Piracy and Rapine.
I look upon it with infinite more content and quiet of Soul, to have been worsted in my en∣forced Contestation for and Vindication of the Laws of the Land, the Freedom and Honour of Parliaments, the Rights of my Crown, the just Liberty of my Subjects, and the true Christian Religion in its Doctrine, Government and due Encouragements, than if I had with the greatest advantages of Success over-born them all; as
some men have now evidently done, what-ever Designs they at first pretended.
The Prayers and Patience of my Friends and loving Subjects will contribute much to the sweetning of this bitter Cup, which I doubt not but I shall more chearfully take, and drink as from God's hand, (if it must be so) than they can give it to Me whose hands are unjustly and barbarously lifted up against Me.
And as to the last event, I may seem to owe more to my Enemies than my Friends; while those will put a period to the Sins and Sorrows attending this miserable Life, wherewith these desire I might still contend.
I shall be more than Conquerour through Christ enabling Me, for whom I have hitherto suffered, as he is the Author of Truth, Order and Peace; for all which I have been forced to contend against Errour, Faction and Confusion.
If I must suffer a Violent Death, with my Sa∣viour, it is but Mortality crowned with Mar∣tyrdom: where the debt of Death which I owe for Sin to Nature, shall be raised as a gift of Faith and Patience offered to God.
Which I humbly beseech him mercifully to accept: and although Death be the wages of My own Sin as from God, and the effect of o∣thers
Sins as men, both against God and Me; yet as I hope My own Sins are so remitted that they shall be no ingredients to imbitter the cup of my Death, so I desire God to pardon their Sins who are most guilty of my Destruction.
The Trophees of my Charity will be more glorious and durable over them, than their ill∣managed Victories over Me.
Though their Sin be prosperous, yet they had need to be penitent, that they may be pardon∣ed. Both which I pray God they may obtain; that my Temporal Death unjustly inflicted by them may not be revenged by God's just in∣flicting Eternal Death upon them: for I look upon the Temporal Destruction of the greatest King as far less deprecable than the Eternal Dam∣nation of the meanest Subject.
Nor do I wish other than the safe bringing of the Ship to shore, when they have cast Me over-board: though it be very strange, that Mariners can sind no other means to appease the Storm themselves have raised, but by drowning their Pilot.
I thank God, my Enemies Cruelty cannot pre∣vent my Preparation; whose Malice in this I shall defeat, that they shall not have the satis∣faction to have destroyed my Soul with my Body: of whose Salvation while some of them
have themselves seemed and taught others to despair, they have only discovered this, that they do not much desire it.
Whose uncharitable and cruel Restraints, de∣nying Me even the assistance of any of my Chap∣lains, hath rather enlarged than any way obstru∣cted my access to the Throne of Heaven.
Where Thou dwellest, O King of Kings, who fillest Heaven and Earth, who art the fountain of Eternal Life, in whom is no shadow of Death.
Thou, O God, art both the just Inflicter of Death upon us, and the merciful Saviour of us in it and from it.
Yea it is better for us to be dead to our selves, and live in Thee, than by living in our selves to be deprived of Thee.
O make the many bitter aggravations of my Death, as a Man and a King, the opportunities and advantages of thy special Graces and Com∣forts in my Soul, as a Christian.
If Thou, Lord, wilt be with Me, I shall neither fear nor feel any evil, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Death.
To contend with Death, is the work of a weak
and mortal man; to overcome it, is the Grace of Thee alone, who art the Almighty and Immortal God.
O my Saviour, who knowest what it is to die with Me as a man, make Me to know what it is to pass through Death to Life with Thee my God.
Though I die, yet I know that Thou my Re∣deemer livest for ever: though Thou slayest Me, yet Thou hast incouraged Me to trust in Thee for Eternal Life.
O withdraw not thy Favour from Me, which is better than Life.
O be not far from Me, for I know not how near a violent and Cruel Death is to Me.
As thy Omniscience, O God, discovers, so thy Omnipotence can defeat the Designs of those who have, or shall conspire my Destruction.
O shew Me the goodness of thy Will, through the wickedness of theirs.
Thou givest Me leave, as a man, to pray that this Cup may pass from Me; but Thou hast taught Me, as a Christian, by the example of Christ, to add, Not My will, but Thine be done.
Yea, Lord, let our wills be one, by wholly re∣solving
Mine into Thine: let not the desire of Life in Me be so great, as that of doing or suffer∣ing thy Will in either Life or Death.
As I believe Thou hast forgiven all the Errours of my Life, so I hope Thou wilt save Me from the Terrours of my Death.
Make Me content to leave the Worlds Nothing, that I may come really to enjoy All in Thee, who hast made Christ unto Me in Life Gain, and in Death Advantage.
Though my Destroyers forget their Duty to Thee and Me; yet do not Thou, O Lord, forget to be merciful to them.
For what profit is there in my Blood, or in their gaining my Kingdoms, if they lose their own Souls?
Such as have not only resisted my just Power, but wholly usurped and turned it against My self, though they may deserve, yet let them not receive to themselves Damnation.
Thou madest thy Son a Saviour to many that crucified Him, while at once He suffered violent∣ly by them, and yet willingly for them.
O let the voice of his Blood be heard for My Murtherers, louder than the Cry of Mine against them.
Prepare them for thy Mercy by due Convictions of their Sin, and let them not at once deceive and damn their own Souls, by fallacious preten∣sions of Justice in destroying Me; while the con∣science of their unjust Ʋsurpation of power against Me chiefly tempts them to use all extremities a∣gainst Me.
O Lord, Thou knowest I have found their Mer∣cies to Me, as very false, so very cruel; who pre∣tending to preserve Me, have meditated nothing but my Ruine.
O deal not with them as blood-thirsty and de∣ceitful men; but overcome their Cruelty with Thy Compassion and My Charity.
And when Thou makest inquisition for my Blood, O sprinkle their polluted, yet penitent, Souls with the Blood of thy Son, that thy de∣stroying Angel may pass over them.
Though they think my Kingdomes on Earth too little to entertain at once both them and Me; yet let the capacious Kingdom of thy in∣finite Mercy at last receive both Me and my Enemies.
When being reconciled to Thee in the Blood of the same Redeemer, we shall live far above these Ambitious desires, which beget such mortal En∣mities.
When their hands shall be heaviest and cruel∣est upon Me, O let Me fall into the arms of thy tender and eternal Mercies.
That what is cut off of my Life in this mise∣rable moment, may be repayed in thy ever-blessed Eternity.
Lord, let thy Servant depart in Peace, for my eyes have seen thy Salvation.
Vota dabunt quae bella negârunt.