The true interest of families, or, Directions how parents may be happy in their children, and children in their parents to which is annexed a discourse about the right way of improving our time / by a divine of the Church of England ; with a preface by A. Horneck.

The Conclusion, shewing how Children ought to improve what hath been said.

From what hath been said, Children may see how great reason they have to perform all those offices of Love, Ho∣nour and Subjection to their Parents, that God requires of them. It remains that they seriously and impartially con∣sider, what their practice has been, and whether they have done those things which God requires them to do to∣wards their Father and Mother.

That you may do this to good pur∣pose, it's fit that you employ some time in looking back on your Lives, in consi∣dering how you have honoured, loved, and obeyed your Parents; that you may see, whether you have carried your selves towards them, in words and deeds, as became good Children, who have a sense of Religion; or whether you have not dishonoured, neglected, and disobeyed them.

If upon Examination of your selves, you find that you have done your Du∣ty; that you have sincerely endeavou∣red to obey them in all things; that you have loved them heartily, and payed them that Respect which you

knew was due unto them: Bless God, who hath given you to will and to do according to his good pleasure. But because there are defects and imperfe∣ctions, which cleave to our exactest performances, therefore it is needful that you beg of God to forgive you, wherein soever you have been faulty, or defective in those Duties you owed them. Consider what these defects and imperfections are, and resolve to amend them, and go on in doing every part of your Duty to them with greater ex∣actness, and with all that perfection that's possible.

But if upon inquiry into your hearts and lives, you find that you have been very faulty and defective in the Duties you owe to your Parents; that you have neglected to do what you ought to have done; that instead of honou∣ring them, you have dishonoured them, you have slighted and despised them, you have mo••k••d and scorned them, you have reviled and reproached them; if instead of obeying them, you find that you have been stubborn and dis∣obedient to them, you have refused to follow their Counsels and Admoniti∣ons, you have done your own Will,

and followed your own vain humour and fancy, in contempt of their Will; if instead of submitting to their cor∣rections and chastenings, you have re∣fused submission to them, and perhaps have rebelled against them; if instead of loving them, you have hated them, and wished, and desired their death; if instead of relieving them in their wants, and supplying them with what was necessary for them, you have wast∣ed their substance by your riotous and extravagant Living, you have put off all bowels of compassion and tenderness towards them; it, I say, you find that you have thus carried your selves to∣wards them, in a way so contrary to your Duty, how ought you to la∣ment and mourn for your wickedness and folly? How ought you to accuse your selves for your great iniquity, and to aggravate your crimes by all just and fit considerations? You may in this manner expostulate the case with your selves: What a sad and unwor∣thy Wretch am I, who have thus dis∣honoured, hated, and disobeyed my dear Parents, who are under God the Authors of my Being in the World, to whom I owe that I am? Who have

proved so undutiful to them who took care of me, when I could not take care of my self? who fed and cloathed me, who were at so great pains and charge for me, who have employed so much of their time and strength to provide for me all necessary things? and yet that I should prove so wicked as to de∣spise them, to disobey them, and hate them; not to submit my self unto them, what base and wicked ingrati∣tude is it? That I, who should have been a Blessing to them, should prove a Curse; That I who should have been a Comfort to them, should be the cause of their grief and sorrow? That I who should have been a help unto them, should be so great a hinderance? That I who should have been the stay and support of their Old age, should prove their ruine, and the cause of the spend∣ing of their days in anguish and trou∣ble? What a prodigious impiety is this? What a wretched and abomina∣ble Creature am I, who have been guilty of such horrid impiety? Who have had so little regard to those who are to me in God's stead here in the World? What punishment do I not deserve? What a wonder is it that

God hath spared me and pitied me, and hath not cut me off in the midst of my disobedience, neglect, and contempt of my Parents! That he hath not made me an Example to all others, and a standing Monument of his just displeasure! That he has not bound me hand and foot, and cast me into utter darkness, and given me my portion with Hypocrites and Sinners; but hath lengthened out my years, and given me time and place to repent!

Having thus in your own minds ex∣postulated the matter with your selves, you may in the next place adore and bless the Divine Goodness, the infinite Mercy, and astonishing Kindness of God towards you, in having spared and pitied you; in not dealing with you after your sins, nor rewarding you after your iniquities; but that he hath been pleased to wait to be gracious to you. Humbly confess your faults and offences unto him; with great shame and confusion of face, and with true grief and sorrow of heart acknowledge your iniquities; make particular con∣fession, so far as you remember, of your stubbornness and disobedience to your Parents, of your contempt and

neglect of them, of your hating them, and wishing Evil to them, of your speaking irreverently and wickedly to them, or of them, of your not sub∣mitting to their Corrections, of your not heeding their Admonitions and Counsels, nor regarding their just Re∣proofs, &c. Beg of God, for Christ's sake, to have mercy on you, and to blot out your Sins, and to make you what you ought to be.

After this, it is fit to form sincere and hearty Resolutions of doing your Duty, in all respects, to your Parents for the time to come; of loving, honouring, obeying, and serving them, as you ought to do. Resolve to a∣mend whatever has been amiss and de∣fective either in your thoughts words or deeds, with relation to them. Beg of God to strengthen you in your Resolutions; to fortify you against all Temptations; to inspire you with his Fear and Love; to guide you by his good Spirit; and that he would ne∣ver leave you, nor forsake you.

If the Example and Society of o∣ther wicked Children has been an oc∣casion of making you so bad, and of hardening you in your Contempt,

Stubbornness and Disobedience; resolve to break off your Familiarities with them; let them and all others know, and see, that you are sorry for your Disobedience to your Parents; for your having dishonoured, slighted, and neg∣lected them; and that you are resol∣ved to do so no more; but will, by the help of God, approve your selves Dutiful, Kind, and Obedient Children.

Not only must you in this manner make your Humble and Penitent Con∣fession to Almighty God your Heaven∣ly Father, whom you have provoked, as by your other Sins, so particular∣ly by your disobedience to your Parents, and by your dishonouring of them; but you must likewise confess unto your Parents the Crimes whereof you have been guilty against them; you must say as the Prodigal did, I will a∣rise, and go to my Father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against Hea∣ven, and before thee; and am no more worthy to be called thy Son. Luke 15.18, 19. Let your Parents see that you are heartily sorry for your Offences against them by Word or Deed; beg of them to forgive you, and desire them to pray to God that he would forgive you.

You are to be careful after this, to fulfil your Purposes and Resolutions, and to perform all those Duties of Love, Honour, and Obedience to your Parents, wherein you were formerly so defective. For this end it is fit, daily and earnestly to beg of God, that he would direct and assist you to do what is well-pleasing in his sight. It is necessary for you to be very jea∣lous of your deceitful and desperate∣ly wicked Hearts; to watch over them carefully, lest they turn aside to∣wards your former crooked Ways; lest you return with the Dog to the Vomit. Watch against all those Temp∣tations, whereby you are most in dan∣ger of being seduced, and intangled again in your former perverse Pra∣ctices and Customs.

As you have been formerly very neg∣ligent and defective in Honouring and Obeying your Parents, endeavour for the future so much the more, to per∣form all those Duties which you owe unto them, with great care and ex∣actness.

As you have been great Examples of Disobedience, strive to be so much the greater Patterns of Obedience. En∣deavour

to do all that you can; that they who have been, by your Coun∣sels, or Examples, corrupted and made stubborn, and disobedient, may be reformed and rescued from their sins and wickedness; that as you have been Instruments to promote Satan's Kingdom, so you may be zealous for the glory of God, for promoting Pie∣ty and true Virtue in the World; whereof this is no inconsiderable part; that Children honour their Father and Mother, and do all those Duties with chearfulness unto them, which God requires.

This is the way to obtain the di∣vine pardon, to turn away his Wrath, and to keep off those heavy Judgments which are threatned against stubborn Children, and such who mock and scorn their Parents: Or if God see it fit to punish you here, he will make your Corrections and Punishments, and all other things, work together for your good; and after he hath tryed you, he will bestow upon you rewards of everlasting Life and Glory.

As for those who are so perverse as to despise all Counsel and Advice, who refuse to hearken to any Instructions,

who are resolved to go on in their stubbornness and disobedience to their Parents, in slighting and vilifying them; let them remember what the Wise Man saith, Eccles. 11.9. Rejoice, O young Man, in thy Youth, and let thine heart chear thee, in the days of thy youth, and walk in the ways of thine heart, and in the sight of thine Eyes: But know thou, that for all these things, God will bring thee into Judgment.