The fryer, an[d] the boy

The Fryer, an•• the Boy.

[illustration] woodcut

LONDON Printed by E: A. dwelli. neere Christ-Church. 1617.

A Merry Iest: of the Frier & the Boy.

[illustration] woodcut

THat God that dyed for vs all, And dranke both vineger and gall, bring vs out of bale: And giue them both good life and long Which listen doe vnto my song, or tend vnto my tale.

¶ There dwelt a man in my Countrie Which in his life had wiues thrée: a bless••ng full of ioy: By the first wife a sonne he had, Which was a pretty sturdylad, a good vnhappy boy.

His Father loued him well, But his step-mother neuer a dell, I tell you as I thinke: All things she thought lost by the Rood Which to the boy did any good, as either meat or drink, And yet I wis it was but bad, Nor halfe enough thereof he had, but euer more the worst, And therefore euill might she fare, That did the little boy such care, so farre forth as she durst. Vnto the man the wife gan say, I would you'd put this boy away, and that right soone in hast, Truely he is a cursed lad. I would some other man him had that would him better chast. Then said the good-man dame not so I will not let the young boy goe, he is but re••ber of age, He shall with me this yeare abide, till he be growne more strong and tride for to winne better wage. We haue a man a sturdy lout which kéepeth our neat the fields about and sléepeth all the day, He shall come home as god me shield,

And the boy shall into the field, to kéepe them if he may. Then said the wife in verament Husband thereto I giue concent, for that I thinke it néede: On the morrow when it was day The litte boy went on his way vnto the field with spéed, Of no man he tooke any care, But song heyho away the mare, much mirth he did pursue, Forth he went with might and maine, Vntill he came vnto the plaine, where he his dinner drew. But when he saw it was so bad, Full little list there to he had, but put it vp from sight, Saying he had no list to tast, But that his hunger still should last till he came home at night: And as the boy sate on a hill, There came an old man him vntill, was walking by the way: Sonne he said, God thée sée, Now welcome Father may ye be the little boy gan say. The old man said I hunger sore Then hast thou any meate in store,

which thou mightst giue to m••? The Childs ropli'de, so God me saue, To such poore victuals as I haue, right welcome shall you be. Of this the olde man was full glad, The boy drew forth such as he had, and said goe to gladly: The olde man easte was to please, He eate and made himselfe at ease, saying, Sonne gramercy, Sonne he said th'ast giuen meat to mée, And I will giue thrée things to thée, what ere thou wilt intreat: Thensaid the boy tis best I trowe, That you bestowe on me a Bowe, with which I birds may get. A Bowe my Sonne I will thée giue, Such as shall last while thou doe liue, was neuer Bowe more fit: For if thou shoot therin all day, Waking or winking, or any way, the marke thou still shalt hit. Now when the Bowe in hand he felt, And Arrowes had vnder his belt, hartily he laught Iwis: And said had I a Pipe withall, Though nere so little or so small, I then had all my wish,

A Pipe Sonne thou shalt hane also, That in true musike so shall goe, I put thee out of dout, As who that liues, and shall it heare, Shall haue no power to forbeare, but laugh and leap about. Now tell me what the third shall be, For thrée things I will giue to thée, as I haue said before: The Boy then smiling, answer made, I haue ynough for my poore trade, I will desire nomore. The olde man said my troth is plight, Thou shalt haue all I thée behight, say on now let me sée: At home I haue (the Boy replide) A cruell Step-dame full of pride, who is most curst to me. When meat my Father giues to me, She wishes poyson it might be, and stareth in my face: Now when she gazeth on me so I would she should a ray let goe which might ring through the place. The olde man answered then anon, When ere she lookes thy face vpon, her tayle shall winde the horne: So loudly, that who shall it hears,

Shall not be able to forbeare but laugh her vnto scorne, So farewell sonne the old man cride, God keepe you sir the boy replide, I take my leane of thée: God that best of all thinges may Kéepe thée safe both night and day, gramercy sonne said he. When it grew neare vpon the night, Iack well prepar'd hide home ful right it was his ordinanee, And as he went his pipe did blow, The whilst his Cattle on a row about him gan to dance. Thus to the Towne he pipt full trim, His skipping beastes did follow him into his Fathers close? He went and put them vp each one, Which done, be homeward went anon to's Fathers Hall he goes. His Father at his supper sat, And little Iack espide well that, and said to him anon: Father, all day I kept your Neat, At night I pray you giue me meat, I'me hungry by S. Iohn, Meatles I haue lien all the day, and kept your beasts, they did not stray,

my diuner was but ill: His Father tooke a Capons wing, And at the boy he did it fling, bidding him eat his fill. This grieu'd his stepdames hart full sore Who loath'd the lad still more and more: she star'd him in the face: With that she let goe such ablast, As made the people all agast, it sounded through the place. Each one did laugh and make good game, But the curst wife grew red for shame, and wisht she had béene gone: Pardy (the boy said) well I wot, That Gun was both well chargd & st••ot, and might haue broke a stone. Full curstly she lookt on him thoe, That looke an other crack let goe which did a thunder raise: Quoth the boy did you euer sée A woman let her pellets flée more thick and more at ease? Fie said the boy vnto his dame, Temper thy tel-tale bum for shame, which made her full of sorrow: Dame said the good-man goe thy way, For why I swears by night nor day thy geare is not to borrow.

Now afterward as you shall heare, Vnto the house there came a Frier, and lay there all the night: The wife this Frier lou'de as a Saint, And to him made a great complaint, of Iackes most vile despite. We haue quoth she within Iwis, A wicked Boy, none shrewder is, which doth me mighty eate: I dare not looke vpon his face, Or hardly tell my shamfull case, so stlthily I fare. For Gods loue méet the boy to morowe, Beat him well and giue him sorowe, and make him blinde or same: The Frier swore he would hint beat, The wife prayd him not to forget, the Boy did her much shame. Some Witch quoth she he is I smell, But quoth the Frier Ile beat him well, of that take you no care: Ile teach him wite-craft if I may, O quoth the wife doe so I pray, lay on and doe not spare. Early next morne the Boy arose And to the field full soone he goes, his Cattell for to driue: The Frier then vp as early gate,

He was affraid to come too late, he ranne full fast and blithe. But when he came vpon the land, He found where little Iacke did stand kéeping his deasts alone: Now Boy he said God giue thée shame What hast thou done to thy Step-dame tell me forthwith anon. And if thou canst not quit thée well, Ile beat thée till thy body swell, I will no longer bide: The Boy reply'd what ayleth thée? My Stepdame is as well as yée, what need you thus to chide? Come will you sée mine arrowe flye, And hit yon small bird in the eye and other things withall? Sir Frier though I haue little wit, Yet yonder Bird I meane to hit and giue her you I shall. There sate a small Bird on a bryer, Shoot shoot you wag then said the Frier for that I long to sée: Iacke hit the Bird vpon the head, So right, that she fell downe for dead, no further could she flée. Fast to the bush the Frier went, And vp the Bird in hand he hent,

much wondring at the chance: Meane while Iack tooke his pipe & plaid So loud the Frier grew mad apaid, and fell to skip and dance. No sooner was the pipes sound heard But Bedlani like he bounst and far'd, and leapt the bush about: The sharpe briers scracht him by the face, And by the bréech, and other place, that fast the bloud ran out. It tare his cloathes downe to the skirt, His cope, his coole, and linnen shirt, and euery other wéede: The thornes this while were rough and thick And did his priuy members prick, that fast they gan to bléede. Iack as he piped laught among, The Frier with bryers was vildly stung, he hopped wondrous hye: At last the Frier held vp his hand, And said I can no longer stand, oh I shall dauncing dye. Gentle Iacke thy Pipe holde still, And heere I vow for good nor ill to doe thée any woe: Iacke laughing to him thus replide, Frier ship out on the other side, thou hast frée leaue to goe.

Out of the bush the Frier then went, All martyrd, ragged, scratcht and rent, and torne on euery side; Hardly on him was left a clout, To wrap his belly round about, his harlotry to hide. The thornes had scratcht him by the face, On hands, on thighes, and euery place, he was all bath •• in blood, So much, that who the Frier did sé, For feare of him, were faine to flée, thinking he had bene wood. When to the good wife home he came, He made no bragges for very shame to sée his cloathes rent all: Much sorowe in his heart he had, And euery man did gesse him mad when he was in the Hall. The good wife said where hast thou béene? Sure in some euill place I wéene, by sight of thine array: Dame (said he) I came from thy Sonne, The Deuill and he hath me vndone, no man him conquer may. With that, the goodman he came in, The wife set on her madding pin, cride, héer's a foule array: Thy Sonne that is thy life and dere,

Hath almost slaine the holy Frier, alas and well away. The good-man said benediciti, What hath the bilde boy done to thee, now tell me without let? The deuill him take the Frier then said, Homade m•• dance despite my head, among the Thornes, the hey go bef. The good-man said vnto him tho, Father, hadst thou bene murdred so, it had bens deadly sinne: The Frier to him made this reply, The Pipe did sound so merrily that I could neuer blin. Now when it grew to almost night, Iacke the Boy came home sull right, as he was wont to do: But when he came into the Hall, Full soone his Father did him call, and bad him come him to. Boy he said, come tell me here, What hast thou done vnto this Frier, lye not in any thing Father he said, now by my birth, I playd him but a fit of mirth, and pipte him vp a spring. That Pipe said's Father would I heare Now God forbid cride out the Frier,

his handes he then did wring: You shall (the boy said) by Gods grace, The Fryer replide woe, and alas, making his sorrowes ring. For Gods loue said the wretched Frier, And if you will that strange Pipe heare, binde me fast to a post: For sure my fortune thus I read, If dance I doe I am but dead, my wofull life is lost. Strong ropes they tooke both sharpe and round And to the poast the Frier they bound in the middle of the hall: All they which at the Table sat, Laughed and made good sport thereat, saying Frier thou canst not fall. Then said the goodman to the boy, Iack pipe me vp some merry toy, pipe fréely when thou will: Father, the boy said verily, You shall haue mirth enough and glée; till you bid me be still. With that his pipe he quickly hent, And pipte, the whilst in verament, each Creature gan to dance: Lightly they skipt and leapt about, Yerking their legs now in, now out, striuing aloft to prance.

The good man as in sad dispaire Leapt out, and through, & ore his chaire, no man could caper hier: Some others leapt quite ore the stocks Some start at strawes and fell ore blocks some wallowed in the fier. The good man made himselfe good sport To sée them dance in this mad sort, the good-wife sate not still: But as shée danst the look't on Iack, And fast her taile did do••••le each crack, loud as a water-mill. The Frier this while was almost lost, He knockt hi•• pate against the poast, 'twas then his dancing grace, The rope rubd him vnder the chinne, That the blood ran fro•• his tatterd skin, in many a naked place. Iack pip••ng ran into the stréet, They followed him with nimble féete, hauing no power to stay: And in their hast the doore did cracke, Each tumbling ouer his fellowes back vnmindfull of their way. The neighbours that were dwelling by, Hearing the pipe so merrily, came dancing to the gate: Some leapt ore doores, some ore the hatch

No man would stay to draw the latch, but thought he came too late. Some sicke or sléeping in their bed, As they by chance lift vp their head, were with the pipe awaked: Straight foorth they start through doores •• locks Some in their shirts som in their smocks and some starke belly naked. When all were gathered round about, There was a bilde vnruly rout that danced in the stréet: Of which some lame that could not go•• Striuing to leape did tumble so, they dancst on hands and féet. Iack tyred with sport said now I'le rest, Doe (quoth his Father) I holde it best, thou cloyst me with this cheare: I pray thée boy now quiet sit, In faith this was the merriest sit I heard this seauen yeare. All those that dancing thither came Laught heartily and made good game, yet some got many a fall: Thou cursed boy cry'd out the Frier, Héere I doe summon thée to appeare before the Officiall: Looke thou be there on Friday next, Ile méete thée then though now perplext,

for to ordaine thy sorrow: The boy replide, I make a vow, Fryer Ile appeare as sóone as thou, if Friday were to morrow. But friday came as you shall heare, Iackes step-dame and the dancing Frier together they were met: And other people a great pace, Flockt to the Court to heare each case, the Officiall was set. Much ciuill matters were to doe, More Libels read then one or two, both against Priest and Clarke: Some there had testaments to prooue, Some women there through wanton loue which got stroakes in the darke. Each Procter there did plead his case When forth did step Frier Topias, and Iackes step-dame also: Sir Officiall aloud said he, I haue brought a wicked boy to thée hath done me mightie woe: He is a Witch as I doe feare, In Orleance he can finde no peare, this of my troth I know. He is a Deuill (quoth the wife) And almost hath bereau'd my life at that, her taile did blowe,

So lowd, th'assembly laught thereat, And said her pistols cracke was flat, the charge was all amisse: Dame (qd. the gentle Officiall) Procéed and tell me forth thy tale, an doe not let for this. The wife that feard another cracke, Stood mute, and nere a word she spake, shame put her in such dread: Ha (said the Frier) right angerly, Knaue this is all still long of thée, now euill maist thou spéed. The Frier said, sir Officiall, This wicked boy will ve••e vs all, vnlesse you doe him chaste: Sir, he hath yet a pipe, truly, Will make you dance and leape full hie, and breake your heart at last, The Officiall replide perdie, Such a pipe I faine would sée, and what mirth it can make: Now God forbid replide the Fryer, That ere we should that vilde pipe h••are ere I my way hence take. Pipe on Iacke (said the Officiall) And let me heare thy cunning all. Iacke blew his pipe full lowd, That euery man start vp and dancst,

Procters & Priests, and Somners pran••t and all in that great crowd, Ouer the desks the Officiall ran, And hopt vpon the Table, that straight iumpt vnto the flore: That Frier that danst as fast as he Met him mid-way, and dangerously broake eithers face full sore. The Register leapt from his pen, And hopt into the throng of men, his Inke-horne in his hand: Which swinging round about his head, pome he strucke blinde, some almost dead, some they could hardly stand. The Procters slung their Billes about: The good-wiues taile gaue many a shout, perfuming all the mirth: He Somners as they had béene wood eapt ore the formes and seates a good, and wallowed on the earth. Renches that for their Pennance came, nd other méeds of worldly shame, danst euery one as fast: ach set vpon a mercy pin, ome brok•• their heads, & some their shin and some their noses brast. he officiall thus sore turmoild, ••lfe swelt with sweat & almost spoild,

cride to the wanton childe, To pipe no more within that place, But stay the sound euen for Gods grace, and loue of Parie milde. Iacke said, As you will it shall be, Prouided I may hence goe free, and no man doe me wrong. Neither this woman nor this Frier, Nor any other creature héere, he answered him anon: Iack, I to thée my promise plight, In thy defence I meane to fight, and will oppose thy fone. Iack ceast his pipe then all still stood, Some laughing hard, some raging wood, so parted at that tide: Tho Officiall and the Somner, The step dame, and the wicked Frier, with much ioy, mirth, and pride.

FINIS.