Comedies and tragedies written by Thomas Killigrew ...

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Title
Comedies and tragedies written by Thomas Killigrew ...
Author
Killigrew, Thomas, 1612-1683.
Publication
London :: Printed for Henry Herringman ...,
1664.
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Link to this Item
http://name.umdl.umich.edu/a47372.0001.001
Cite this Item
"Comedies and tragedies written by Thomas Killigrew ..." In the digital collection Early English Books Online. https://name.umdl.umich.edu/a47372.0001.001. University of Michigan Library Digital Collections. Accessed June 15, 2024.

Pages

ACT. IV. SCEN. II.

Enter Wanton and Wild.
Want.

YOu had best brag now, and use me like my Lady what'st ye call; But if you do I care not.

Wild.

Come, y'are a Fool, I'le be a faithful Friend, and make good conditions for thee before thy husband be quit.

Want.

You must do it now or never.

Wild.

Heark, heark, I hear them—What's the news?

Wild sits down with Wanton in his Lap.

Enter Captain, Jolly, Watch, Baud and Parson.
Capt.

We have brought a Couple of Delinquents before your Worship, they have committed a very foul fault.

Page 126

Joll.

And we have brought the fault along too, that your Wor∣ship may see it, you will be the better able to judge of the of∣fenders.

Pars.

Ha! What do I see? my wife in Master Justices Lap?

Want.

What has the poor fellow done?

Capt.

Why Madam, he has been taken a Bed with this woman, anothers mans wife.

Want.

In bed with her? and do you raise him to punish him? Master Constable, if you would afflict him, Command them to lie together again; Is not the man mad?

Pars.

This is fine Roguery, I find who rules the roast.

VVild.

Well, to the business; you say, he was taken in bed with another mans wife.

Capt.

Yes, and't like your Worship.

VVild.

Make his Mittimus to the Hole at New-gate.

VVant.

Sure I have seen this Fellows face.—Friend, have I ne∣ver seen your face before?

Pars.

If I mistake not, I have seen one very like your Ladyships too, she was a Captains cast-whore in the Town. I shall have a time to be reveng'd.

Wild.

How now, Sirrah? are you threatning? away with him.

Capt.

I'll fetch a stronger Watch, Sir, and return presently.

Wild.

Do, Master Constable, and give the poor Woman some∣thing, and set her free; for I dare say 'twas his wickedness, she lookes like one that ne're thought on such a thing.

Baud.

God bless your Worship, I am innocent; he never left making Love till I consented.

[Enter Captain in his own shape.
Pars.

Oh miserable! miserable!

Capt.

How now, what's the news here? my honoured Friend, and Master Parson, what makes you here at this time of night? Why I should have thought this a time to have envy'd you for your fair Brides embraces, do you give these favours? are these your Bride-laces? It's a new way.

Playes with the cord that bindes his Armes.

Pars.

Is it new to you?

Want.

How now Captain?

Capt.

Wanton, is this your plot to endear your Husband to you?

Pars.

No, 'tis thy plot, poor beaten Captain, but I shall be reveng'd.

Capt.

Yes, faith, it was my plot, and I glory in't, to undermine my Machiavell, which so greedily swallowed that sweet bait that had this hook.

Pars.

'Tis well.

Capt.

But my anger ends not here. Remember the base language you gave me, Son of a thousand Fathers, Captain of a tame band, and one that got my living by the long staffe-speeches; for which, and thy former Treacheries, I'll ruine thee, Slave; I'll have no more Mercy on thee, then old women on blind puppies; I'll bring you to your Commendations in Latine Epistles again, nor leave thee any thing to live on, no, not Bread, but what thou earn'st by raking Gentlewomens names in Anagrams; and Master Justice, if ever you'll oblige me, stand to me now, that I may procure the whipping of him from the Reverend Bench.

Page 127

Pars.

I am undone.

Wild.

I can do nothing but Justice, you must excuse me; I shall onely make it appear how fit it is to punish this kind of sin in that Coat in time, and to crush such serpents in the shels.

Pars.

Mercy, Oh Mercy!

They pull him away.

Wild.

Officers, away with him.

Pars.

No Mercy?

Want.

Yes, upon Conditions there may be some Mercy.

The Parson lookes very dejected.

Wild.

And these they are—let the watch stay in the t'other Roome.—First, your Wife shall have her liberty, and you yours, as she reports of you; and when you bring her with you, you shall be welcome; then you shall not be jealous, that's another point.

[Exit Watch.
Capt.

That he shall have a Cure for—

Want.

Yes, yes, I'll apply something to his Eyes shall cure him of his doubt.

VVild.

Then you shall ask the Captain pardon and your Wife; to him you shall allow half your Parsonage to maintain her; The Deedes are ready within; if you'll sign them, and deliver your Wife to our use, she shall discharge you.

Pars.

I submit, Sir, But I hope your Worship will desire no wit∣ness to the use of my Wife; The Sumner and the Watch too; I hope your Worship will enjoyn them silence.

VVant.

You shall not need to fear, I'll have a Care of your Credit;

She discovers them.
call in the Watch; Do you know these Faces?

Pars.

Ha! abus'd?

Jolly.

Nay, no flinching, if you do, I betake me to Master Sumner again.

Capt.

And I become severe Master Constable in a trice.

Pars.

No, no, I submit, and I hope we are all Friends; I'me sure I have the hardest part, to forgive.

VVant.

And I, before all this Company, promise to forget and forgive thee, and am content to take thee again for my dear and mortal Husband, now you are tame; but you must see you do so no more, and give your self to be blind; when it is not fit for you to see; and practise to be deaf; and learn to sleep in time, and find business to call you away when Gentlemen come that would be private.

Capt.

Why so, now things are as they should be; and when you will obey, you shall command: But when you would be imperi∣ous, then I betake me to my Constables Staff 'till you subscribe. Cedunt Armis Togae; and if it be false Latine, Parson, you must par∣don that too.

Jolly.

By this hand, I must have my Tythe-night with thee; thou art such a wag; say, when? when wilt thou give me leave? ha!

VVant.

Never.

Jolly.

Never?

VVant.

No, never.

Jolly.

D' ye hear, I am none of them that work for Charity; ei∣ther resolve to pay, or I kick down all my Milk again.

Page 128

VVant.

What would you have?

Jolly.

Give me leave to lie with you.

VVant.

No indeed.

Jolly.

No?

VVant.

No; but rather then quarrell, as I said before, I will give you leave to say you have lain with me.

Wild.

I am of opinion she owes you nothing now, so Mistress Wanton, take your Husband; and to remove all doubts, this night I'll be at the charge of a Wed ding supper.

Pars.

This is better then Newgate hole yet, Bridewell Hemp, brown bread and whip-cord.

[Exeunt omnes.
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