Another collection of philosophical conferences of the French virtuosi upon questions of all sorts for the improving of natural knowledg made in the assembly of the Beaux Esprits at Paris by the most ingenious persons of that nation / render'd into English by G. Havers, Gent. & J. Davies ..., Gent.

CONFERENCE CXLVIII. Whether is better, to Love, or to be Lov'd. (Book 148)

THe same Nature, which by an instinct common to us with∣all things in the world, causes us to seek our own good, obliges us likewise to Love, when we meet Goodness or Beauty in an object capable to render us happy by its possession; which consisting in being united to the thing lov'd, 'tis in this union that the Lover places his greatest felicity, and accordingly goes out of himself to joyn himself to what he loves; the motions of the will (of whose number Love is) differing in this point from the actions of the Understanding, that these are perform'd by the Species receiv'd by mediation of the Senses into the In∣tellect, which cannot know any thing but what comes home to it; but the Will when it Loves, must go out of it self and be∣come united to the thing it Loves, to the end to beget somthing for Eternity. And because things are not known by the Under∣standing

till they have been first purifi'd from the grossness of their matter by the illustration and abctraction which the Agent Intellect makes of their Phantasms or Species, hence the notions of the foulest and most dishonest things are always fair and laud∣able, being spiritualis'd and made like the Faculty which knows them. On the contrary, the Will in loving renders it self like the object which it Loves, is turn'd into its nature, and receives its qualities; if the object be unlawful and dishonest, it be∣comes vicious and its love is criminal. Which seems to argue that the Lover is less perfect then the Loved, into which he is transform'd; as food is less perfect then the body, into which it is converted. And as that which attracts is more excellent then what is attracted, because the stronger draws the weaker; so the thing Loved must be more excellent and noble then the Lover, whom it attracts to it self. Moreover, Love, accord∣ing to Plato, is a desire of Pulchritude, which desire implies want; and therefore he that Loves shews thereby that he wants some perfection, which renders the thing Lov'd amiable: since the Will is never carri'd to any object but what hath some good∣ness either apparent or real. Only God loves not his Creatures for their goodness, since they have none of themselves; but his will being the cause of all things, he renders them good by loving them and willing good to them.

The Second said, Since friendship consists in the union of two, or at most, of three Wills, whose mutual correspondence makes that agreeable harmony and those sweet accords, which make ravishing Lovers dye in themselves to live in what they love; there is no true love but what is reciprocal; which is the reason why none can be contracted with inanimate things, no more then with Beasts or Fools. And Justice commanding us to ren∣der as much as is given us; 'tis a great injustice not to love those that love us; yea, if we may believe the Platonists, 'tis a kind of homicide of the Soul; since he that loves, being dead in himself and having no more life but in the thing lov'd, if that refuses his love, by means whereof it should live also in him as he in it, he is constrain'd either to dye or languish miserably. And whereas he that loves is no longer his own but belongs to the thing lov'd to whom he hath given himself, this thing is ob∣lig'd to love him by the same reason that obliges it to love it's self and all that pertains thereunto. But though perfect love be compos'd of these two pieces, to love and to be lov'd; yet the one is often found without the other, there being many Lo∣vers wounded with the Poets leaden Arrows, who instead of seeing their love requited with love, have for all recompense nothing but contempts and, refusals. 'Tis true, that it being harder to love without being lov'd, then to be lov'd without loving, there is no body but would chuse rather to be lov'd then to love upon those terms, because nothing flatters our am∣bition so much as to see our selves sought unto. Yet loving is a

nobler thing then to be lov'd; since honor being more in the honorer then the honored, the honor receiv'd by the lov'd thing reflects upon him that loves; who for that reason being com∣mended by every one that esteems a good friend as a good trea∣sure, and not he that is lov'd, is also more excellent and hath more vertue, inasmuch as he hath more honor and praise which are the attendants of vertue. Moreover, the Lover acts freely, and therefore more to be valu'd then the lov'd person, who is forc'd to suffer himself to be lov'd. For though desire common∣ly follow Sensual Love, yet Love is not a desire, nor consequent∣ly a sign of Indigence; otherwise, it should cease with the desire, and expire after enjoyment; which is false: for Mothers love their dead Children, and even before they came into the world, not by a desire but by a motion of Nature, which causes us to love what appertains to us, and the more if it cost much pain; which is the reason why Mothers, who contribute more to the birth of their Children, and have better assurance that they are their own, love them also more tenderly then Fathers do.

The Third said, That to compare the lov'd person with the Lover, is to equal the Master with the Servant; for the amorous assuming to themselves the quality of Servants of the Ladies whom they call their Mistresses, manifest sufficiently thereby that they yield them the pre-eminence. And al∣though they be the most interessed in this cause; yet they will never have the vanity to prize themselves above what they love; which would be to condemn their own choice and their love of defect of judgment, which making them sigh after the enjoyment of the object they adore, argues their want and in∣digence, not to be supply'd by possession of the good they ex∣pect from it; which herein like the Intelligences which move without being mov'd themselves, excites passions and motions in the Lover's breast, it self oftentimes remaining immovable. And as he acts in a more noble way that moves without being mov'd, because he resembles the end, which is the noblest of all the Causes; so he that loves resembles Matter which Desires all Forms, expecting its perfection from them; and consequently is inferior to the person that is lov'd, as from whom he expects his felicity. Even in Mutual Love, he that begins is less per∣fect, as confessing by that address some inviting accomplish∣ments in the other, who finds not any obligation to love him again but the consideration of gratitude: For inferring the ad∣vantage of those that love from the nobleness of their subject, as in Gods love to his Creatures, and that of Parents to their Children; I answer, that 'tis rather an effect of passion then of true love.

The Fourth said, That Love is according to the variety of its Object, (Good), three-fold; considering either Profit, or Pleasure, or Vertue. In the two former, 'tis better to be lov'd then to love, but they are of no long duration; those friends

being wont to break as soon as they cease to find their market or the contentments which they receive from those to whom they pretended kindness. In honest friendship (which alone deserves that name, being founded only upon vertue, which makes it durable) though 'tis not possible to love without being lov'd, because vertuous persons being alike mutually love and agree well together; yet since this Amity, before it can become such must be cemented by frequentation, without which they cannot understand, nor consequently love one another, because love arises from knowledg, it may be demanded whether the active love of him that loves first be better then the passive of the other who is lov'd. Which Question I determine for the for∣mer, because he contributes most to the ensuing friendship, by laying the foundations of it. For friendship, as well as other things, is preserv'd by the same means that produce it, namely, by loving. And as the Agent is nobler then the Patient, as concurring more considerably to the perfection of the work; so he that loves being the Agent is more perfect then the Person lov'd, who is the Patient. Also to love is to wish and do good; to be lov'd, is to receive it: But 'tis more honorable and ver∣tuous to give then to receive; which is a shameful action: and therefore he that receives never desires witnesses. Hence, as he that do's a benefit loves more then he that receives it, as the Artificer loves his work more then his work loves him, and a Creditor desires his Debtor's safety more then on the contrary; in like manner he that loves is more excellent then he that is lov'd, Love being not so much a testimony of indigence as abundance, because 'tis a desire of communicating; and the more goodness a Being hath, the more it is communicative and diffusive.