§. 54. Of the equall respect that children are to beare to both parents.
As the distinct duties of children haue beene set forth, so I thinke it requisite to declare distinctly who the parties be to whom those duties are to be performed. These principally are the naturall parents, both Father and Mother. Seconda∣rily such as are in the place of parents.
The first point then to be noted is, that children beare an equall respect to both their naturall parents, and performe du∣ty to both alike. The law expresly mentioneth both, Honour thy Father and thy Mother. Well may we thinke that there was some iust and vrgent cause, that the law which so briefly vnder as few words as well could be, compriseth exceeding much matter, should expresly mention father and mother, when as there is one word, parent, which includeth both. Now what other reason can be rendred then the point in hand?
It is worthy to be noted, how the Apostle contenteth not himselfe to haue named parents, which implieth both, but also annexeth the expresse words of the law, which in particu∣lar setteth downe, father and mother. It is expresly set downe of Iaakob that he obeyed his father and his mother. Among o∣ther * pen-men of Scripture Salomon expresly mentioneth both father and mother, euen almost twenty seuerall times in Prou.
Many reasons there be to inforce this point.
1. Both parents are vnder God a like meanes of their chil∣drens * being. Children come out of the substance of both alike.
2. The care and pains of both for the good of the children is very great: I know not of whether the greater. The mothers paines and care in bringing forth the childe is indeed the grea∣ter, and it may be also the greater in bringing vp the childe, especially while it is young, at least if she giue it sucke her selfe: yet afterwards the fathers exceedeth in prouiding fit calling, Page 485 sufficient meanes of maintenance, yea and portion or inheri∣tance for it, and that after he himselfe is dead. Thus one way or other the childe is equally bound to both: and according∣ly Gods law maketh no difference betwixt them.
Obiect. The wife is subiect to her husband: therefore a childe ought to preferre his father before his mother.
Answ. Though there be a difference betwixt father and * mother in relation of one to another, yet in relation to their children they are both as one, and haue a like authority ouer them. Now children are not to looke to that difference that is betwixt their parents in that mutuall relation that is be∣twixt husband and wife, but to that authority which both pa∣rents haue ouer their children: and so to carry an equall re∣spect to both.
2. Obiect. What if the fathers and mothers disposition * be contrary: and the one command what the other forbids.
Answ. The thing commanded or forbidden must be ob∣serued: if it be about a thing simply good or euill, lawfull, or vnlawfull, then the parent which would haue the thing lawfull to be done, or vnlawfull to be for borne (though it be the mo∣ther) must be obeyed: for in this case she is backt with Gods authority. But if the matter be meerely indifferent, then I doubt not but the father must be obeyed: yet so as the childe no way shew any contempt to his mother, but with all reue∣rence and humility make it knowne to her that it is best both for her-selfe and himselfe, that his father be obeyed. But if the fathers contrary authority be not interposed, or if the father be dead, then is a mother as simply and absolutely to be obey∣ed in all things, as a father.
