A Hermeticall banquet, drest by a spagiricall cook for the better preservation of the microcosme.

THE THIRD COURSE HEPATICALL.

SEe what a merry Gossip Health is! she is alwayes exciting us to Mirth. I have already wandred through two Parts of ••he World with her: in which Pilgrimage my ••ides are so larded with the Fat operation of ••er good Diet, mixt with the extravagancies of ••er ridiculous Mirth, that with a Months hard ••odging I might very well supply the defect ••f a Christmass Brawner. And now she hath ••ut me in this good plight, I must not leave ••er neither. If I but speak of parting, she ••enies me my Billeto di Sanita. Then she ••ugs me, kisseth me, bids me rowse up my ••pirits, laugh, sing, dance, and let care go a ••atter-wauling. She swears that she is in love

with my good Diet▪ and doteth on the Tem∣perance of my Youth: and tells me that I shall do very ill to leave her, that have so often protested that I could not live well with∣out her.

Faith I felt all this to be true! And though I knew her to be a noted Strumpet•• one that would sell herself to any man for a little good Diet. Besides how Inconstant she was drawing every Mans Eyes upon her to corrupt her; and letting every Boy lye with her. Again▪ accustomed to feed on the best and would not be brought out of her good Diet; but if she misliked her feeding, leave a man. Yet considering that she was of good Bloud, honest Parentage, alwayes well dispo∣sed, and of good breeding; Full of Mirth, a••••fable, not subject to any Ill Humors Fair, and of a pure Complexion. Her vertues being e∣quivalent with her vices; I fell so far in Love with her, that I made her Lady of my Desires & in short time she won so far upon me, that she govern'd me, and withall made me so fond of her, that if I were absent but a Mi∣nute from her me thought I was Sick. In fine▪ let her be in what Humor she would, I was her Morpheus, and Imitated: if she slep'd so did I. If she were distempered▪ So was I•• And being thus lost in the Labyrinth of Love:

let her wander where she please I have vow'd to follow, humor her, and beat her charges.

Thus captivated there did I Fall in the Veines of Poesy. The Magick of my Mistris Eyes Made me no more apologize: But at a look, where ere she went, Follow I must, or lose Content. Here toth' Hepatick land shee'd go, Where Delicacies overflow: And there she promis'd I should see Mars in a Box of Quidini. Next Venus Court, Whereas I might In time with Cupid lose my Sight. But ear these Wonders I could see I first an Israelite must be, And pass the mercy of a Floud Which some baptize the Sea of Bloud. There I was Sea-sick and would fain With Healths permission ope a Veine: No she would no such bloudy Trick, Sheed first for company be sick; Empty my stomack, and she said The Red-Seas fury would be laid. After those Waves had plai'd their sport,* 1.1 At last they brought us to a Port Whose milky Torrent drove us in To Loves restoring Magazin.

Here sweet Health laughs, gives me a buss, And bids me hug my Genius; Then shews where Venus hid her Treasure, Some for Health and some for Pleasure, Next her Temple (whereat she bowes) Then her Altar, then her Vowes, (Upon which Altar, a Chalice stood Brim full of desperate Lovers Bloud) Bids me be modest, shut mine Eyes, Lest I were call'd to Sacrifice. And here she shew'd that fatall Well Wherein she said Narcissus fell. Hence in al haste my Love departs And ushers out the Queen of Hearts, Whose Deity was magnifi'd By a rich Train of Courtly Pride. Her Whiteboy Cupid flew before To ••orce all strangers to adore His Mothers beauty; For which intent His Bow was alwayes ready bent. Next came Intemp••rance with a Cup Of ruddy Nectar: Drinks it up, And then growes wanton: At me she ran And kist me twise. Here Health began To swell look big, and puffing to me said, I was to blame to kiss Loves Chambermaid. I prai'd my Mistris not to take it ill: Since she kist me, 'twas manners to stand still.

In this Distemper Venus came, Who calls my Mistris by her name, And ask'd where she that Youngster had Which made her Maid Intemp'rance mad. Quoth Health, a stranger tis, would be A Pupill in your Nursery. Venus straight swore, hee's Patron here, Such Guest we have not every year: My Family is so decai'd That I am forc'd to wo my Maid Intemperance, to bring me In Some able Sparks a Gossiping. Here Venus kist me, and protests For Health sake shee'd obey my heasts, Her Mars from hence as Old shee'd quite deny, I was chief Member of her Family. She bids Intemp'rance to retire, And charge her Cooks to lay toth' Fire Their Egge-pyes, Marrows, armed Fishes, What they thought restoring Dishes. To see her dining Chamber were Perfum'd against Guest entred there, And to express our Wellcome more, Bad her strew Rushes at the Door. Then to her Palace she invites The fury of our Appetites. Here health corrupted was she said By a strong Phylter from Loves Maid,

And therefore follow'd, gins to dance, And kisses sweet Intemperance. Entring, stood Hercules at the Door As Portar, and a Lambs skin wore. No sooner in, but Venus she Kist me again to welcome me. First by the Kitchin Dore we past, Where I a sheepish eye did cast Upon the Cooks (fair Ladies all) So busie at the Funerall Of hot Potatoes, young Cock Sparrows, Whose graves they dig'd in Pyes of Marrow. That Men interr'd by such a strong refection Must needs expect a speedy resurrection. Some which delighted not in Pyes Were knuckle deep in Quidinyes. There Geladini, Consummadi, Cockbroth, Caudles, Pineoladi, Eggs and Amber, Maqueroni Avec Gallorum Coglioni Made those sweet Laydes sweat and labour so That every Juncture seem'd in Balneo. Health whisper'd here into mine Ear, And said those meats I must forbear, Lest that Temptation should at length Force me to go beyond my strength. Hence passing up to Loves sweet Chamber, Where every step was Musk, and Amber,

Venus to vary her sweet blisses, Numbred our steps with sugred kisses, And when we entred at the Door She multiplied a thousand more. There a round Table spread I found With Diaper hanging to the ground, Where the first Course did ready lye Epecting Hungers Battery. Venus uncover'd all her Dishes, Better cheer for me she wishes, Bids me fall to: then guides my hand Into a Dish of Marzapan. My Appetite being up, I fed Like one new risen from the dead. And had't not been for Eggs and Ling I had indanger'd surfeiting. Venus there saw I was distasted, Whispers to Cupid; who streight hasted, Brings, sweet waters in a Dish For us to wash after our Fish. After a Cup or two of Wine, A kiss, a smile, in little Time The second Course here enter'd in. I fed as I had famish'd been. My hunger was so sharply set I laid about me till I sweat. Venus so taken was at this My mouth she oft stopt with a kiss.

Swearing I was a well-come guest, Whose hunger did commend her Feast. Health was content that I should here Participate of Venus Cheere, Until she saw a third Course come, Then shee'd have had me left the roome. M' Herculean Pillar there she said that I Must streight put up, and non plus ultra cry. How to please both I could not tell, Venus I lov'd, and Health aswell. If I neglected what was there Love thought I scorn'd such homely fare; If I exceeded 'twas a chance But Health would scorn m'Intemperance. Here I grew dull, and very sad. Venus or drunk, or else half mad, Claps in my spoon into a Pot Of perfum'd Gelly scalding hot, And cri'd twas a restoring bit For such as Diet Health with Wit. I curst a Pox upon her Gelly, Wish'd spoon and Pot within her Belly, Gave her knocks which made her ly For half an hour in Extasy, Flung down the Table, Split her Dishes, Rent all her napkins, burn'd the Rushes, Broke Cupids head, & call'd Health Whore, Made her drink drunk and sleep inth'Dore:

Then up I went, call'd Bacchus in, Where he and I afresh begin. Mars hid himself within the Barrel, Let out the Wine to make us quarrell▪ Bacchus begins a double glass Unto my Mistress Sanitas, I swore I'd pledge it full as deep, And make her drink it in her sleep. Health in a Dream here stagring up Made Venus rise: Then takes my Cup And challeng'd Bacchus. Venus she Fill'd Cupids Quiver▪ and challeng'd me With a deep draught, a good yard long, Of Bristow Milk, pleasant but strong, Whose practise made her heave it in, As though't had but a spoonful been. Half spent before, I could not stand, Against this Bachanalian, I still gave back, and durst not venture, Fearing I should not reach the Center. Venus the slut begins to boast, And ask if I would have a Toast. Or if I'd have a Neats-tongue pie, The which she said would make me drie, To save my Credit (for I saw A Womans will would hear no law, And though it were a Veniall Sin, Drunk or sober shee'd hav't in)

To it I went, and at first bout I suck'd but half the Quiver out. She smil'd and bad me try again. I fear'd the breaking of a Vein. Yet this I saw, that she was laid And could not stand; Yet must be paid, Swearing't should cost another fall But she would see me take up all. Mad Girl quoth I, then drink't I wooll Although it wear a Pulpit full. Heer's to thy Mars. Were Vulcan up Wee'd make his horn our second Cup. And know that I am none of those Which sleep when th'Glass is at their Nose Oh how she hugg'd me for that word! But lo comes Health arm'd with her sword And vows if that we do not fly, Mars would be at us by and by. For she had spi'd in Bacchus Butt A man lye arm'd from Head to Foot, And asking Bacchus who twas there, He trembling said God Mars I fear. Tush let him come out of his Barrell Quoth Venus! Ile maintain your quarrel What do you tremble at his sight? My Courtiers must expect to fight. At this boy Bacchus staggers up, And forc'd my Mistris tother Cup.

I flung a Bowle of Sack in's eyes, And bad him learn to Temporize: Here Bacchus flung me to the ground, His Barrell broke, the hoops ran round, God Mars awak'd, and out he comes, Where head gainst head excus'd for drums. Health here was wounded; so was I. Venus fell in a Lethargy, The loss of bloud made Mars retire. Bacchus still cast new coals inth'fire. A bloudy Fray there had you seen, If Somnus had not entred in, Who did his heavy Club advance And knock'd us all into a Trance. Sanitas was dreaming here Of Bacchus Bowles and Venus cheer, So whilst I slep'd, she stole away Three hours before the break of Day. Out of this trance when I awak'd, My brains they crow'd, my back that ak'd. I felt for Health; look'd under th' bed, Faith she was gone. There I halt dead Cald Cupid: told him I was dry, Pray him to bring some Quidiny. The Jacknapes Boy gave a blind look, Bad me to's Mother, she was Cook. I flung my slippers at his head And weakly crawling out the Bed I crope to Venus chamber Door 〈…〉〈…〉 to enter as before.

She thrust me back, and swore shee'd see What arms I bare ear in I be. I knew 'twas Death for any one to bring Toth' Privie Chamber a Pocket Pistoll In. Therefore I durst not strive to enter Lest that my firelock peradventer Should take fire: But only ask'd if she Knew where my Sanitas might be. Alas quoth Venus corne you here To seek for Health! since fifteen year I never saw that sober lass Your Diaetetick Sanitas, Go home and fast with bread and water, You'l see your Mistris will come after.

Did not I tell you Gentlemen what an In∣constant Baggage this Health was. She was not only content to entice me to a Bawdy House and there leave me; but she must rob me of my Poetry too. Well she shall not scape me thus. Rather than lose her ile follow her in Prose: for in that disguise I may chance to re∣cover her, since the very name of a Poet makes her hide her self in the Buttery. I know this is but a trick of hers to make me forsake Venus Court and follow her: for I remember at her parting she seemed much distempered only at the sight of Venus, wishing her as far as Na∣ples.

Had she not spoke that in cold bloud I should have had little reason to believe her; since I ever found her Venus bosome friend, and al∣wayes alluring me to her Court. Nay I could never rest for her, untill she had entred me there: where for her sake I was content to do any thing, and yet the Peevish slut would ever be hitting me in the teeth with my inconstan∣cy; though she know twas for her sake I first became dishonest.

I think few men would do so much for a Mistriss as I have done for her. I was content to lead my obedience into the race of her Me∣thod: where I alwayes run one Course, fed upon one dish, exercised but once a day, drunk but one sort of drink, never flattered Appetite with more sawces than one, w^ch was Hunger: & yet this precise Girle would not be content. Let her dance over her monologies with her lean sister Temperantia and she will. For my part if I but finde her again, Ile teach her an∣other course of life: she shall be glad to dance after my Pipe, or ile make her heart bloud smart for it.

To go back again to Venus Court to seek her, I have no inclination in the World: nei∣ther doth hope give me any assurance of find∣ing her there. Yet find her I must that's Certain, or else all will not go well.

I am almost of Opinion that if I could but regulate my self according to the custome of these Hepatick Inhabitants, and settle my self wel here but one forty days, and let health run out her course, that in the end she would come sweating to me again. But I fear I shall not digest their hard Diet.

The other day in a hungry humor I was looking about in the Cooks shops here for some choise bit: faith I could find nothing but dry livers, and a kind of black burnd broath they made which was bis••cotto.

I asked the Cooks what they did with the rest of their better meat? they said that I was come in a very ill hour, and that they had al∣ready sent all their best provision to the Car∣diacall Princes Court.

Yea thought I! here is no abode for me: ile none of your chew'd meat. Hence wandring up and down in this bloody land; I came at length into a passage so narrow, that at every step I gal'd my Elboes.* 1.2 The bitterness of the Passage, and the fury it put me into made my legs make many a motion to begon out of it. As hasty as I was, I could go but slowly, every lim being over-loaden with passion. If I had ••et my Mistris there, I had beaten her out of all Reason.

I thought this had been the way to Venus

Hospitall, it made me sweat so: but in over∣••oing a little more labour I found it was a ••lind passage to Mars his Arsenall. Where I was no sooner entred, but I fell in choler with Ajax Lieutenant of the Guard for stain∣••ng my Stockins▪

Here I saw a great number of Fachini strongly loaden with Vast Baskets on their shoulders, hasting to a little bitter well, where •• saw them open their burdens, taking some∣what out of their Baskets, dipping of it in the water, and presently retiring of it again. My Curiosity was upon thorns to understand the Mystery of their exercise. So that drawing towards them and discovering their Baskets to be full of Humane Tongues, I asked one of them what secret might be inclos'd in that bitter Ceremony.

Quoth he! the Women of the Hepatick ••and (being all sanguine and me••ry Gossips) one day at a Publike Feast in Venus Court were all so silenc'd by the thundring Rodom••n∣••adoes of the Garrison Souldiers of Mars his Arsenall, that their Tongues grew cold for want of Motion. Here they call'd a Counsell among themselves, how they might arrive to this braving humor. A Virago start up, and perswaded them that the best, and readiest way was to single out one of those Souldiers from

his Cameradi, and said she ile undertake with the smell only of a Baston to make him con∣fess where they stole our Female Treasure o•• Talking and how they became so nimble Lin∣guists. This was approved of by all, and sud∣denly executed.

They made Venus call up one of those Gar∣rison So••ldiers into her Chamber, there they all set their tongues on a wheel, and run upon him with so violent a Prologue that Thunder seemed still Musick to it. The Souldier, accu∣stomed to such storms, answered their Thunder with such a rimbombo, that his Ecco's eat up their Audience. Here my Virago takes him by the bigoteroes▪ and by vertue of a bed-staf•• first char'd him to be more masculine, and let silence skin his Tongue which over galld with his continuall motion, and then give them leave to talk to whom other arms were pro∣hibited. Next quoth she I conjure thee by this fearfull Maedusa's head of thine (for he was a Spaniard) to reveal truly unto us, where you with the rest of your Companions have learn∣ed this Womanish Art, and verball Bravery. My poor D•••• promises upon his knees, if they would omit Violence he should discover how and where he was thus possest. Venus her self secured him that no hand should be guilty of injury, only let him disclose his secret.

Why then quoth he, you must first know that our Court of Guard in Mars his Arse∣nall, when Nature first practised Chymistry, was her Laboratory. Mars being troubled with too many white-liver'd Souldiers (such as durst never serve but in some Garrison where there was never any likely-hood of imploy∣ment) one day discoursing merrily with dame Nature concerning the Philosophers stone, he told her that his curiosity led him not into those golden vanities; so that his Souldiers were paid, heed never mo••l for other Treasure. But quoth he if I thought your skill afforded any secret to arm a Coward with Valour, I should gladly carry coales and be your Pupill.

In that, Quoth Nature you speak of Im∣possibilities▪ for those kind of men are com∣posed of a Mettal so dull cold and Saturnine, that like Salamanders, they resist and extinguish our actuating fires: so that I am ever fain to thrust them into the World do bak'd.

Yet said she, this I can do; I will make you a Spagiricall water which shall give Co∣wardize an Externall Tincture of Valour: into which let the dullest Spirited Man in your Camps but dip his Tongue, and he shall seem another M••gaera; and maintain in a Soul∣diers stile that the Valour of Achilles, and the labours of Hercules were but a game at

Cudggells in Comparrison of those Conquests, Siedges, Batteryes, Assaults, Skirmishes, Am∣boschadoes, Pitch'd-Battells, Combats, Sea∣fights, Duells, &c. Which the World can witness his Arm to be the author of.

Now as I am a Souldier, quoth Mars, this Secret must not be lost. And though in our Actions 'twill lend us but little succour; yet be it only to delight our Collonels, and Com∣manders at a siege, when they want Pastime to call one of these Rodomontadi into their Tents, and hear him batter Castles with his Tongue, It will be very acceptable to me if you please to favour me with it.

Nature told him, very willingly, and withall desir'd his patience to stand by, and see the O∣peration, which she promised him would be very delightfull to him.

Then she first took of Tongues and galls of

• ...Bulls.
• ...Bears.
• ...Wolves.
• ...Dogs.
• ...Magpies.
• ...Dawes.
• ...Parretts.
• ...Parrakitoes.
• ...Iayes.
• ...Cuckoes.
• Nightingales. an. n. j.

From Vegetables she took these Herbs

• ...Cynoglossum.
• ...Hippoglossum.
• ...Arnoglossum.
• ...Buglossum.
• Ophioglossum an. M. j.

From Reptilia animalia she took of the tongues and tailes of

• ...Vipers.
• ...Adders.
• ...Snakes.
• Lizards an. num. j.

From Spagiricall Compositions she took of

• ...Aurum fulminans.
• ...Aqua fortis.
• Gunpowder. an. lb. j.

From every great Bell she took a Clapper, from every Apothecaries great Mortar she took a Pestell. These she mixt all with the former; and then luted them up in great Bells, and so Calcin'd them in the Aetna.

The Ashes of which she dissolv'd in a wa∣ter

distilled from all the Violent Torrents and after Filtrated it first through the leaves of Ca∣lepine (to make her Operation the more ver∣ball) then through twelve new Moons, thereby to attract the essence of their Change and variable inconstancy.

Being well Filtrated, she distil'd all through a Trumpet, and then separated the Phlegma as unprofitable in this Work.

The Spirits which remained, she put into the Mouth of a Canon, closly luting it Sigillo Hermetico, and then Circulated them twelve years in the Primum mobile: where contrary to our Spagiricall Circulating fires, they be∣came more agile, mobile, and volatile. Those Spirits thus Circulated she mixt with a Mouthfull of the Quintessence of every Er∣ratick Star. Then she opened the Graves of all new deceased Lawyers, Charlitani, Tripe-wives, Oyster-Wives, and such like talkative people; cut out all their Tongues, and with the skins thereof she made a great Bladder; which bladder she strongly luted with Drum-heads; and then fill'd it up with Storms, Tem∣pests Whirl-winds, Thunders, Lightnings▪ &c. Those for their better Incorporation she set (twelve other years) in a Ruff Sea in Fermen∣tation. Which finished, she mixt these with the former: and to be sure there should not re∣main

the lest breath of Phlegma, she rectified them every day thrice in a Balneo of Quick∣silver twelve other years.

Lastly, to inrabiate the whole Elixir, and make it the more Canine, she cut a vein un∣der the Tongue of the Dog-Star, drawing from thence a pound of the most Cholerick, adust, and maligne bloud; from which she Subli∣mated the Spirits, & after mixt them with the fome of a mad Dog. Then incorporating all together, she return'd them into the former Bladder, Stitching it up only with the Nerves of Socrates his Wife.

And thus she finished her Operation, and presented it to Mars; bad him put it into any Spring, Well or Fountain, and it should suddenly contaminate the Water with that talkative Vertue.

Mars presently (said the Souldier) put it into our Well here in the Court of Guard in his Arsenall, and commanded the better part of his Souldiers once in the year to dip their Tongues in this Water, whereby (quoth he) fair Ladyes I became so bitter a Linguist.

And said he▪ if this be the ground of your ••uarrell▪ I wish that all your tongues were perboiled in that water that so you might ne∣••er be taken Prisoners by that dull Enemy si∣••ence.

Here, the Women had no patience to thank him; but turning him speedily out of the Chamber (as having what they looked for) they presently began a new to consult, how they might get their Tongues washed in this Well; knowing that it was prohibited for any of their Sex to enter Mars his Arsenall.

Some of them (whose itching tongues could not admit of delay) longing to have a lick at this Water, stole privatly out of the Chamber, and home they ran; put on their Husbands Breetches, and a way to Mars they went, took pay, and were admitted into his Court of Guard.

The rest, concluded, that Venus, having a great Command over Mars, should petiti∣onate to him that all the Womens tongues (of the Hepatick land) might once in the year be dipt into his Lexicon to make them Talka∣tive. Mars for Venus sake (being resolved likewise never to marry) gave them licence; but upon promise they would send their Tongues but once a year, and never to come personally.

And thus, said the Fachin, once a year I and my Camaradi (we having purchas'd the Monopoly) gain more upon this Day than our Familyes can consume all the year following: not a Woman omitting the day appointed, to

send their tongues, with a double Fee; to have them the better washed.

This amazed me more than any thing I had hitherto seen in my Travells.

And indeed, the strangness of it had eat up my belief, had I not heard the tongues which he had washed lie••▪ scolding in his Basket. Then I asked this Fac••ino whether he had e∣ver washed his Wives tongue yet? Oh quoth he, she could never sleep untill she had it: in∣somuch that I am glad to wash mine own tongue twice for her once, and yet not able to silence her. Upon this I desired him to give me a little bottle of that water to carry into my Country as a Rarity. By no means quoth he, for it will make you run Mad and scold with∣all you meet. Why then said I are not all your Women mad? Marry replied he so they are, more or less, according to my descretion in washing them.

I began to thank Iove here, that this Well was so far from our Country: though I did suspect that some of them had been licking here. The generall love therefore which I bare to that Sex, made me in pitty, not able to see their Tongues so infected; but drawing my Sword I beat away more than a hundred of those Tongue-loaden Knaves, which were co∣ming to this Well: (presuming that some

Wittall or other would put me in his prayers for it) and then knowing I had committed an Errour by drawing my sword in the Arsenall, out I ran all in Choler, and as yellow as a Kites leg. I had not gone far from thence, but I met my wandring Mistris Sanitas with a double Tertian on her back. She perceived that I had been lately in Choler, which made her come shaking to me, and excuse her long absence with trembling Apologies. I took her by the hand (which Fear had benum'd with a sleepy chilness) and asked her why she trembled so? Oh quoth she, the fear which I have that you will not keep me, turns me all into a Gelly. So that the Organ pipe of your breath only makes me answer you in quavers.

The poor Girl lent me such pittifull looks, that I had a feeling of her misery: wherefore I presently eased her of the burden of her Song, and took a Tertian on my Back, in place of a Knap-sack, and away we went to seek out some charitable Hospitall. Thus thinking spee∣dily to depart out of the Torrid-Zone of this Hepatick Land contra••y to expectation we found all the passages stopt, by a great inun∣dation of Waters: an affliction surely sent from Heaven to punish those corrupt Livers. This made us lye at Anchor one Month the longer: where I had much ado to keep life in

my Mistris Sanitas, finding no provision there that was Edible, all things being so unsavory with those brackish waters, that what ever we put into our Mouths Nature thought time lost in masticating them. Hence not only we, but all the inhabitants grew weak, some pale, some greenish▪ others yellow, and black, all sickly, for want of our fomer good nourish∣ment.

It would have mollified a Heart of Ada∣mant to have seen those matchless beauties of this Clymate▪ young Lasses of fourteen years, ruddy and sanguine▪ have their Virgin beau∣ties Eclypsed by the green Mantle of Loves standing Pool.

Yong married Wives whose tender Palates having been lately accustomed to feed on fresh and dainty bits, now finding their Markets ill served, with dull and sapless Sallads; their Beccarii full of drowned Calves whose flag∣ging, and flashy flesh, scarce sweet, their Dogs formerly would not have gap'd at: not able to subsist with this course diet, rather chuse to feed upon green fruits, and frutta nova, un∣till at last their forbidden diet bring them into a Tympany.

Young lusty Batchelours here, which ente∣red into Pension at other mens Tables, never remembring this generall inundation, but

finding their diet altered, their meat rank, stale, and of a fishly savor; they suspecting the Cause to be their Hostesses desire of gain, for∣sake her Table straggle up and down, taking here a snap, and there a snap, untill at last ma∣ny littles of what is bad, corrupt them making them perfect Pythagorists and abhor all flesh ever after.

Gentlemen, if any of you be Travellers, and Curiosity lead you at any time to visit the Hepatick Dominions, see first in the Map of my Travells whether you can make any ob∣servations profitable for so dangerous, and de∣sperate a Voyage▪ Read my description of Ve∣nus Court, and see if her entertainment can allure you out of your Country. And when you go, be sure to make Health your Mistirss, and when you come to Venus table, let not that wanton Hostess intise you to disorder. Or if she do▪ do not drink your Mistriss drunk that she might not be Jealous, and then play false under Nose. Have a speciall Care like∣wise that you be not too familiar with that Lady Venus, for she is Mistris unto the Viceroy Spiritus Naturalis, of those Hepatick Terri∣toryes, who will play the Tyrant if he take you napping: bringing you first on your knees to a publike Confession, and then delivering you into the Hands of the Tormentor, who puts

you into a little Hole like a Tub, and feeds you with nothing but dry musty Crufts, and puddle water, the very smell whereof puts you into Symptomaticall sweats. There hee'l smoak you like a Bacon hog: and for fourty dayes you must expect twice a day to be stew∣ed in your own grease. Believe me every bone will have a feeling of his Torments, and though at last he relieve you, yet you shall never be your own man again.

If you incounter with Bacchus (as he is never from Venus Court) be sure that your first Cup be a parting Cup. And for Mars come not near him, lest you grow Cholerick, and so be inflamed, to your great loss of Bloud.

This Hepatick Land is so delicious, and be∣witching, that few young men return from hence without a Calenture.

Considering therefore how many strong and well-fleshed bodies are brought low in the Torrid-Zone of this Hepatick land, I have altogether laboured in this third Course to feed you as Venus fed me, onely with Re∣storatives, that you may travell more cheer∣fully with me unto the Cardiacall Court.

But first that you may examine the honesty of our Splenditore, I shall desire you here to o∣ver-see what Hepaticall Ingredients he hath

brought out of Galens Market, before he de∣liver them to the Cook, and his Lardery▪ that so if the Cook and he should afterwards play false; you may find it in your Dishes.

Hepaticall Ingredients which Heat and Corroborate a colde weak Liver.

• ...Agrimon.
• ...Absinth.
• Capill. ♀
• ...Salvia.
• ...Cuscuta.
• ...Asarum.
• ...Schaenant.
• ...Spica.
• ...Agerat.
• ...Faenicul.
• ...Apium.
• ...Asparag.
• ...Eupator. A∣vicen.
• ...Helenicum.
• ...Flos Tunicis.
• ...Vvae pas.
• ...Pistachia.
• ...Sem. calida.
• ...Cal. aromat.
• ...Cassia lig.
• ...Cinamom.
• ...Aromata omnia.
• ...Nucl. Persic.
• ...Lig. Indic.
• ...Sassafras.
• ...Rad. Chinae.
• ...Sassaparill.

Such as Cool and strengthen a hot Liver.

• ...Endivia.
• ...Cichoria.
• ...Scariota.
• ...Dens Leon.
• ...

• ...Portulac.
• ...Rosae.
• ...Violae.
• ...Nimphaea.
• ...Acetosa.
• ...Fragaria.
• ...Sem. frig.
• ...Hordeum.
• ...Santal.
• ...Camphor.
• ...Pom. gran.
• ...Ribes.
• ...Berberis.
• ...Melones.
• ...Cerasa.
• ...Acetum.
• ...Serum Capr.

Now that our liquid Restoratives may run down with a better relish, we will first fall to our Biscuit.

And for this purpose our Cook here pre∣sents you with a French Biscuit, which he hath borrow'd from a French Cook; and to make it the more Sympaticall with your Diet, he gives it here another heat.

• ℞. Of the purest flower, lb.ss.
• Of the whitest Sugar, ℥iiij.
• Cream of Pinioli.
• Cream of Pistacks
• Cream of Almonds. an.℥j.
• Oil of Annise. an. g. x.
• Oil of Cinamon. an. g. x.

With four or five fresh Eggs beaten together in Almond milk

made with Rosewater, mix all toge∣ther, s.a. Of which make your Biscuit in what shape you please, and then recommend it to the Oven.

Next comes in play a Martiall bread, Panis Martius, which the French Character stamps into Maquaron; whose composition, is thus,

℞. Sweet Almonds blanched, lb j. beat them exquisitely in a mortar, moisten them with Rosewater, then incorporate therewith of the best white Sugar lb j. Gum Dragant dissolved in Rosewater, with three or four whites of Egges, beat all to a perfect mixture, and make your Ma∣quarons, and dry them only with a temperate heat.

These give a speedy nourishment, and are therefore necessary in all Consumptions of the Liver and Lungs.

From Biscuit we will fall to our diet d••ink: presuming every man to wax dry after a Crust.

That we may remember therefore our merry Dayes past, lets drink our own Healths

••n this Hepaticall Cup: and if the last Man quarrell because theres no body to pledge him; let him call his Mistris Sanitas in play, and then all will go well.

The first Hepaticall Diet drink,

• ℞. Agrimon.
• ...Fol. Salviae.
• ...Cochlear.
• Eupator. Avic. an. M. j.
• ...Flor. Rosmarin.
• Spicae. an. P. j.
• ...Sem. Faenic.
• Anis. an. ℥ss.
• ...Rad. Asparag.
• ...Petrosel.
• Faenicul. an. ℥j.
• ...Cinamom.
• ...Zinzib.
• Calam. arom. an. ℥iij.
• Sassafras. ℥vj.
• Passularum. lb.ss.

All prepared according to art, and put up in a Canvass Bag, Cast it into a little Barrell of White Wine, or new Wort. Then have you a diet drink both Therapeutick and Pro∣phylactick in all cold Distempers of the Liver,

preserving likewise every Part from Obstru∣ctions the Originall of most Diseases.

The Second Hepat. Diet drink,

• ℞ Rad. Chinae.
• Santalor. om. an. ℥vj.
• ...Rad. Cichor.
• ...Endiv.
• ...Nymph.
• Liqu••rit. an. ℥j.
• ...Flor. Rosar. rub.
• ...Violar.
• Nymphae. an. P.j.
• ...Sem. Portulac.
• ...Lact.
• Papav. alb. an. ʒiij.

With these proceed as with the former, but taking small Wort, and you shall finde it a Singular Cooler after your Travells in the Hepatick Torrid Zone.

And who ever loves Coursing, and is at the charge of a Runing Nag, he shall find this his best watering.

The third Hepat. Diet drink.

• ℞ Lig. Guaiac.
• ...Sassaparil.
• ...Sassafras.
• Rad. Chinae an. ℥ij.
• ...Sem. Anisi.
• Faenic. an. ℥j.
• ...Rad. Glycyrrhys.
• ...Cichoriae.
• Endiviae. an. ℥ss.
• ...Cinamom.
• ...Nuc. mosch.
• Galangae. an. ʒij.

Inclose all in a Barrell of White wine, and ••••serve it to your use, which is an Excellent ••••yer of all superfluous humidityes of this ••epatick soil; corroborates and califies a ••••ld distempered Liver, Evacuates all maligne ••apours per Diaphorisin, and restores it to his ••aturall temper. Therefore I recommend it ••••all Philogynists.

Before you drink any more Healths give our Palate a little dry Gust, and tast of these ••egall Pastes, which in all Consumptions, ex∣••••ustion of Spirits, lost forces, bring you in ••••e Field again and make you Combatant.

The first Regall Paste.

• ℞ Amygdal. dulc. decort.
• ...Nucleor. Pineor.
• Pistachior. an. ℥iii.j.
• ...Sem. Cucum.
• ...Cucurb.
• Melon. an. ℥j.ss.

All beaten in a Mortar, irrigate them with Rosewater, then adde Sacch. alb. ℥xij. Peni••••dii. ℥ij. Gum. Arab. ℥iij. Amyli. ℥j. Fiat•• past. Regal. s.a. The which is an excellent re∣storing cooler.

The Second Regall Paste.

• ℞ Pulp. Capon. assi.
• ...Perdic. assatar.
• ...Carnium Testud.
• ...Cancror. fluviat. inVin.
• ...alb. lot. Et in aq. hord.
• decoctar. an. ℥iiij.
• ...Pinearum recent. mund. in aq. rosar
• tepid. per 4. horas infusar. ℥iij.
• 4. sem. frig. major. mund.
• Amygdal. dulc. decort. an. ℥ij.
• Penidiorum. ℥j.ss.

All beat in a Marble Mortar; pass them through a Scive with Rosewater: to which you shall adde Sacchar. alb. in aq. rosar. dissolut. lb. j. Sacchar. cand. ℥ij. gum. Traga∣eant. ʒiij. Boil them all with a gen∣tle fire unto a convenient congluti∣nation, which when it cools, you shall adorn with these Jewells,

• ...Salis Perlar.
• Salis Coral. an. ʒij.

Then make it up into little Cakes of what form your Fancy falls into, and dry them in a tepid Oven.

This for Restoring exceedes all, and is able to incarnate a 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉 repairing Nature so fully her losses, that she will run Mad to be gaming again.

The third Regall Past.

• ℞ Rad. Satyr. in jure Capon. ebullit.
• Et postea cum aq. ros. cribat. ℥iiij.
• ...Amygdal. dulc. decortic.
• ...Pistach. mund.
• Pinear. mund. an. ℥iij.
• ...Pulp. rad. fring. per crib. passat.
• Pulp. rad. Pastinac. cribr. an. ℥ij.
• ...

• Farin. Cicerum. ℥ij.ss.
• Scinci marini. ℥ss.
• ...Galangae.
• Zinzib. condit. an. ʒiij.
• Vitel. ovor. recent. num. x.
• Sacchar. alb. lb.j.ss.
• Fiat Past. Reg. s.a.

I did very Ill I did not reserve this third Regall Past untill the end of my Banquet: for I fear 'twill make some of you rise before the last Course enter.

You hotter Livers, shall use for a Cooler this insuing Amygdaline Milk: which in Summer heats, and after other calefying ex∣cercises, you shall find inflam'd Nature repay your Charity in cooler terms.

Lae Amygdalinum.

• ℞ Amygdal. decort. ℥iiij.
• ...Sem. Cucum.
• ...Papav. alb.
• ...Lactuc.
• Melon. an ℥j.

Macerate all four hours in Rosewater, then with Sugar. q.s. fiat lac. Amygd.

Here is an Italian Dish for you Gentle∣men, very substantiall and pleasant: and I

doubt not but when you have tasted of it you will gladly inrich your Cooks with the ℞.

I will not bid you fall to whil'st 'tis hot: for 'tis to be eaten cold.

Bianco mangiare.

• ℞. Of the flower of Rice. lb.ss.
• dissolve it in Milk, q.s.

Then take the Pulpe of a young Capon tender boyld, sweet Almonds numb. xxiiij. beat these well in a Mortar, then mix them with the Milk, and Rice: pass all through a Course Cloath, adding thereto what quantity of Sugar you please: Then boil it on a soft fire, still stirring it, untill it coagulate into the consistence of a strong Gelly: when it begins to cool adde thereto of Amber, and musk dis∣solv'd in Rose water as much as shall render it a gratefull odour.

But for those which are brought so low, that Nature is almost desperate of ever giving another flesh Livery, to such I present this in∣suing Restorative or Consummada, which a∣bove all other, manifests his effects in a most momentary Operation, replenishing the Veins faster with bloud, than assimilation can dis∣pence of it.

The Prime way for Consummadoes.

℞. An old Capon exenterated, his neck, wings, and feet cast away▪ and the rest cut into small pieces. Then take one or two Partridges, the flesh of a leg of Veal all cut smal then mace∣rate all 24. hours in white Wine. Then put the Wine and flesh into a great glass Phialam with ℥ss of Cinamon, and two nut-megs grosly beaten prepared Pearls and Corall of each ʒiij. Flowers of Borage, Bug∣loss, an. P. j. All being well mixt to∣gether and the Orifice of your Glass exactly stopt, set it ••n Balneo bulliente where let it boil well for eight or nine hours without Intermission. Then strain all through a Coarse Canvas, separating the fat which swims on the superficies, and if there yet appear any signe of Crudity, reboil it again between two dishes untill it's white∣ness manifests a perfect decoction. Of which you are to take but three or four spoonfulls warm, reiterating the same every three hours: and thus in little time you may promise your bones a Winter Coat.

Here is Don Consummadoes Cosin Ger∣man Signior Geladino, who petitionates as a well-wisher to your State, and desires to en∣ter into pay: pray Sirs judge him not at first sight to be a Coward, because he trem∣bles when any Man toucheth him: for upon my Word he is hearty enough, and deserves to be your Corporall.

Geladina.

• ℞. A Capon of two years old,
• the flesh of a leg of Veal,
• four Calves feet,
• White Wine,
• Fair water. an. lb vj.

Boil all in a new earthen vessell, scum∣ing of all the fat: when 'tis well boild, strein it, separating all the fat. Then put this broth into a new vessell with lbj.ss. of Sugar. Cinamon unbeaten ℥ss. Cloves num. 12. boil it again a little, then adde thereto the whites of two eggs; then rebo••l it again, and pass it per manic. Hip. s.a. before it cool mix a little Musk, and Amber dissolv'd in Rosewater with it.

These Hepaticall Dishes which you have hitherto fed upon do onely restore: here I will close up your Stomacks with a Therapeutick Dish▪

An Hepaticall Antidote.

• ℞. Agrimon.
• ...Fol. Eupator. Avi••.
• ...Absinth.
• Salviae. an. M.j.
• ...Faenic.
• ...Rad. Petrosel.
• ...Aspar.
• Helenii. an. ℥j.
• ...Spicae.
• ...Flor. Salviae.
• Tunicis. an. P.j.
• ...Faeniculi.
• ...Sem. Anisi.
• Carui. an. ℥ss.
• ...Calam. arom.
• ...Cinamom.
• ...Cassiae lig.
• ...Sassafras.
• Rad. Chinae. an. ℥ij.

With the rectified Spirits of Wine draw their Tincture: to which Tincture you shall adde,

• ...Extract. santal.
• Extract. Chelid. an. ℥ss.
• {tartar}ri {vitriol}lati. ʒiij.
• Tinctur. croci ♂ cum {oil} {sulphur}ris praep. ʒij.
• Salis Corallor. ℥ss.
• Essentiae ♂ ʒj.

Circulate them all in Balneo the space of twenty four hours, then in B. Vaporoso sepa∣rate the Spirits from the Tincture untill it co∣agulate to an Extract which you shall reserve a part.

The Spirits you shal animate with the Soul of his Vegetables.

The Vertues.

'Tis a Universall Antidote against all He∣paticall debilitations proceeding from a cold Distemper. It corroborates the Liver, and all the Naturall Facultyes, returning them their proper strength and temper.

So that for all such Persons as by reason of a weak Liver are proclive to Dropsies, Ca∣chexies, Jaundice▪ &c. Art never lent us a more absolute Preservative.

Dosis.

You are to take the Quantity of a scru∣ple, either alone or in Wine, Broth, or some Specificall Water.

Notes

• * 1.1

  Vena. Porta.
• * 1.2

  Vesica fellis.