CHAP. VIII. Advice in the Cases of Contumely and Revenge.

OF Provocations to Anger there are two sorts; there is an Inju∣ry, and there is a Contumely. The for∣mer in its own Nature is the heavier; the other, slight in it self, and only Troublesome to a wounded Imagina∣tion. And yet some there are that will bear Blows, and Death it self, ra∣ther than Contumelious Words. A Contumely is an Indignity below the Consideration of the very Law; and not worthy either of a Revenge, or so much as a Complaint. It is on∣ly the Vexation, and Infirmity of a weak Mind, as well as the Practise of a Haughty and Insolent Nature, and signifies no more to a Wise, and Sober Man, than an Idle Dream, that is no sooner past than forgotten. 'Tis true, it implies Contempt; But what needs Page  77 any Man Care for being Contempti∣ble to others, if he be not so to him∣self? For a Child in the Armes to strike the Mother, tear her Hair, claw the Face of her, and call her Names, That goes for nothing with us, because the Child knows not what it does. Neither are we mov'd at the Impu∣dence, and Bitterness of a Buffon; though he fall upon his own Master, as well as the Guests: But, on the Contrary, we encourage, and enter∣tain the Freedom. Are we not Mad then, to be Delighted, and Displeas'd with the same thing, and to take that as an Injury from one Man, which pas∣ses only for a Raillery from another? He that is Wise, will behave himself toward All Men, as we do to our Chil∣dren: For They are but Children too; though they have Gray hairs; They are indeed of a larger Size, and their Errors are grown up with them; They live without Rule, they Covet with∣out Choice, they are Timorous, and Unsteady, and if at any time they hap∣pen to be Quiet, 'tis more out of Fear, Page  78 than Reason. 'Tis a wretched Con∣dition to stand in awe of every Bodies Tongue; and, whosoever is vext at a Reproach, would be proud if he were Commended. We should look upon Contumelies, Slanders, and Ill Words, only as the Clamour of Enemies, or Arrows shot at a distance, that make a Clattering upon our Armes, but do no Execution. A Man makes himself less than his Adversary, by Phansying that he is Contemn'd. Things are only Ill, that are Ill Taken; and 'tis not for a Man of worth to think him∣self better, or worse, for the Opinion of Others. He that thinks himself In∣jur'd, let him say, Either I have de∣serv'd this, or I have not. If I have, 'tis a Iudgment; if I have not, 'tis an Injustice; and the doer of it has more reason to be asham'd, than the sufferer. Nature has assign'd every Man his Post, which he is bound in honor to maintain, let him be never so much press'd. Diogenes was Disputing of Anger, and an Insolent young Fellow, to try if he could put him beside his Page  79 Philosophy, spit in his Face; Young Man, sayes Diogenes, this does not make me Angry yet; but I am in some doubt whether I should be so or no. Some are so Impatient, that they cannot bear a Contumely, even from a Wo∣man; whose very Beauty, Greatness, and Ornaments, are all of them little enough to vindicate her from many Indecencyes, without much Modesty, and Discretion. Nay, they will lay it to heart even from the meanest of Servants. How wretched is that Man whose Peace lies at the Mercy of the People. A Physitian is not Angry at the Intemperances of a Mad Patient, nor does he take it ill to be Rail'd at by a Man in a Feaver: Just so should a Wise Man treat all Mankind, as a Phy∣sitian does his Patient, and looking up∣on them only as Sick, and Extrava∣gant; let their Words, and Actions, whether Good, or Bad, to go equally for nothing; attending still his duty even in the Coursest Offices that may conduce to their Recovery. Men that are Proud, Froward, and Power∣ful, Page  80 he values their Scorn as little as their Quality; and looks upon them no otherwise, than as people in the Access of a Feaver. If a Begger wor∣ships him, or if he takes no Notice of him, 'tis all one to him; and with a Rich Man he makes it the same Case. Their Honors, and their Injuries he accompts much alike; without Re∣joycing at the one, or Grieving at the other.

IN these Cases, the rule is, to par∣don all a Offences, where there is any sign of Repentance, or hope of Amendment. It does not hold in Injuries, as in Bene∣fits, the Requiting of the one with the other. For it is a shame to overcome in the one, and in the other to be overcome. It is the Part of a great Mind to despise Inju∣ries; and it is one kind of Revenge, to neglect a Man, as not worth it: For it makes the first Aggressor too Conside∣rable. Our Philosophy methinks might carry us up to the Bravery of a Gene∣rous Page  81 Mastiff, that can hear the Bark∣ing of a thousand Curs, without ta∣king any Notice of them. He that re∣ceives an Injury from his Superior, it is not enough for him to bear it with Patience, and with out any thought of Revenge, but he must receive it with a Chearful Countenance, and look as if he did not understand it too: for if he appear too sensible, he shall be sure to have more on't. 'Tis a Damn'd humor in Great Men, that whom they wrong, they'll hate. It was well answer'd of an old Courtier; that was ask'd, How he kept so long in fa∣vor? Why, sayes he, by receiving Inju∣ries, and crying your humble Servant for them. Some Men take it for an Ar∣gument of Greatness, to have Revenge in their power; but so far is he that is under the dominion of Anger, from being Great, that he is not so much as Free. Not but that Anger is a kind of pleasure to some in the Act of Re∣venge: but the very Word is Inhu∣mane, though it may pass for Honest. Virtue, in short, is impenetrable, andPage  82Revenge is only the Confession of an Infir∣mity.

IT is a Phantastical Humor, that the same b Jeast in Private, should make us Merry, and yet Enrage us in Publick; nay, we will not Allow the Liberty that we take. Some Railleries we accompt Pleasant, others Bit∣ter: A conceipt upon a Squint Eye, a Bunch-back, or any Personal Defect, passes for a Reproche, And why may we not as well hear it, as see it? Nay, if a Man Imitates our Gate, Speech, or any Natural Imperfection, it puts us out of all Patience, as if the Coun∣terfeit were more Grievous, than the doing of the thing it self. Some cannot endure to hear of their Age, nor others of their Pover∣ty; and they make the thing the more taken Notice of, the more they desire to hide it. Some Bitter Jeast (for the purpose) was broken upon you at the Table; keep better Com∣pany then. In the Freedom of Cups a sober Man will hardly contain him∣self Page  83 within Bounds. It sticks with us extremely sometimes, that the Porter will not let us in to his great Master. Will any but a Mad-Man quarrel with a Curr for barking, when he may pa∣cify him with a Crust? What have we to do▪ but to keep farther off, and Laugh at Him? Fidus Cornelius (a tall, slam Fellow) fell down-right a Crying in the Senate-house, at Corbu∣lo's saying, that he lookt like an Estrich. He was a Man that made nothing of a lash upon his Life, and Manners, but it was worse than Death to him, a re∣flection upon his Person. No Man was ever ridiculous to others, that laught at himself first: It prevents mis∣chief, and 'tis a Spiteful disappoint∣ment of those that take pleasure in such abuses. Vatinius (a Man that was made up for Scorn, and Hatred, Scurrilous, and Impudent to the high∣est degree, but most abusively witty, and with all this he was Diseas'd, and Deform'd to extremity) his way was alwayes to beg in to make sport with himself, and so he prevented the Page  84 Mockeries of other People. There are none more abusive to others, than they that lie most open to it them∣selves; but the humor goes round, and he that laughs at me to day, will have some Body to laugh at him to morrow, and revenge my Quarrel. But howe∣ver there are some Liberties that will never go down with some Men.

ASIATICUS VALERIUS (one of Caligula's particular Friends, and a Man of Stomach, that* would not easily digest an Af∣front) Caligula told him in publick, what kind of Bedfellow his Wife was. Good God! that ever any Man should hear this, or a Prince speak it, Especially to a Man of Con∣sular Authority, a Friend, and a Hus∣band; and in such a Manner too, as at once to own his Disgust, and his Adul∣tery. The Tribune Chaereas had a weak broken Voice, like an Hermo∣phradite; when he came to Caligul•… for the Word, he would give him some∣times Venus, otherwhiles Priapus; as Page  85 a Slur upon him both wayes. Vale∣rius was afterward the Principal In∣strument in the Conspiracy against him; and Chaereas, to convince him of his Manhood, at one blow cleft him down the Chine with his Sword. No Man was so forward as Caligula to Break a Jeast, and no Man so Unwil∣ling to Bear it.