The third book of the works of Mr. Francis Rabelais, Doctor in Physick containing the heroick deeds of Pantagruel the son of Gargantua / now faithfully translated into English by the unimitable pen of Sir Thomas Urwhart.

CHAP. XXXI. How the Physician Rondibilis counsel∣leth Panurge. (Book 31)

PAnurge continuing his Discourse, said, The first word which was spoken by him who guelded the Lubbardly quaffing Monks of Saussiniac, after that he had un∣stoned Friar Corcil, was this, To the rest. In like manner, I say, to the rest. There∣fore I beseech you, my good Master Ron∣dibilis, should I marry or not? By the ra∣king pace of my Mule, quoth Rondibilis, I know not what Answer to make to this Problem of yours.

You say that you feel in you the prick∣ing Stings of Sensuality, by which you are stirred up to Venery. I find in our Faculty of Medicine, and we have founded our Opinion therein upon the deliberate Resolution and final Decision of the anci∣ent Platonicks, that Carnal Concupiscence is cooled and quelled five several ways.

First, By the means of Wine. I shall easily believe that, (quoth Friar Ihon) for when I am well whitled with the Juyce of the Grape, I care for nothing else so I may sleep. When I say (quoth Rondi∣bilis) that Wine abateth Lust, my meaning is, Wine immoderately taken; for by In∣temperancy proceeding from the exces∣sive▪ drinking of Strong Liquor, there is brought upon the Body of such a Swill∣down Bouser a chilness in the Blood, a slackening in the Sinews, a Dissipation of the Generative Seed, a numbness and he∣betation of the Senses, with a perversive wriness and Convulsion of the Muscles; all which are great L••ts and Impediments to the Act of Generation. Hence it is that Bacchus, the God of Bibbers, Tip∣lers and Drunkards is most commonly painted Beardless, and clad in a Womans Habit, as a Person altogether Effeminate, or like a libbed Eunuch. Wine neverthe∣less taken moderately worketh quite con∣trary Effects, as is implied by the old Proverb, which saith, That Venus takes cold when not accompanied with Ceres and Bacchus. This Opinion is of great Antiquity, as appeareth by the Testimo∣ny of Diodorus the Sicilian, and confirmed by Pausanias, and universally held amongst

the Lampsacians, that Don Priapos was the Son of Bace••us and Venus.

Secondly, The Fervency of Lust is aba∣ted by certain Drugs, Plants, Herbs and Roots, which make the Taker cold, ma∣leficiated, unfit for, and unable to perform the Act of Generation; as hath been of∣ten experimented in the Water-Lilly, Heraclea, Agnus Castus, Willow-twigs, Hemp-stalks, Woodbind, Honey ••uckle, Tamarisk, Chastree, Mandrake, Bennet, Kecbuglosse, the Skin of a Hippopatam, and many other such, which by conveni∣ent Doses proportioned to the peccant Humour and Constitution of the Patient, being duly and seasonably received with∣in the Body, what by their Elementary Vertues on the one side, and peculiar Properties on the other, do either be∣numb, mortifie and beclumpse with Cold the prolifick Semence; or scatter and dis∣perse the Spirits, which ought to have gone along with, and conducted the Sperm to the places destinated and ap∣pointed for its reception. Or lastly, Shut up, stop and obstruct the ways, passages and conduits through which the Seed should have been expelled, evacuated and ejected. We have nevertheless of those Ingredients, which being of a contrary Operation, heat the Blood, bend the

Nerves, unite the Spirits, quicken the Senses, strengthen the Muscles, and there∣by rouze up, provoke, excite and inable a Man to the vigorous Accomplishment of the Feat of Amorous Dalliance. I have no need of those, (quoth Panurge) God be thanked, and you my good Master. Howsoever I pray you take no exception or offence at these my words; for what I have said was not out of any ill Will I did bear to you, the Lord he knows.

Thirdly, The Ardour of Lechery is very much subdued and mated by fre∣quent Labour and continual Toiling: For by painful Exercises and laborious work∣ing, so great a Dissolution is brought upon the whole Body, that the Blood which runneth alongst the Channels of the Veins thereof, for the Nourishment and Ali∣mentation of each of its Members, hath neither time, leisure nor power to afford the Seminal Resudation, or superfluity of the third Concoction, which Nature most carefully reserves for the conservati∣on of the Individual, whose Preservation she more heedfully regardeth than the propagating of the Species, and the mul∣tiplication of Humane Kind. VVhence it is, that Diana is said to be chast, be∣cause she is never idle▪ but always busied about her Hunting, For the same reason

was a Camp, or Leaguer of old called Ca∣strum, as if they would have said Castum: because the Soldiers, Wrestlers, Runners, Throwers of the Bar, and other such-like Athletick Champions, as are usually seen in a Military Circumvallation, do unces∣santly travel and turmoil, and are in a perpetual stir and agitation. To this pur∣pose Hippocrates also writeth in his Book, De▪ Aere Aqua & locis: That in his time there were People in Scythia as impotent as Eunuchs, in the discharge of a Vene∣rian Exploit; because that without any cessation, pause, or respit, they were ne∣ver from off Horseback, or otherways as∣siduously employed in some troublesome and molesting Drudgery.

On the other part, in opposition and repugnancy hereto, the Philosophers say, That Idleness is the Mother of Luxury. When it was asked Ovid, Why Egistus became an Adulterer? he made no other Answer but this: Because he was idle. Who were able to rid the World of Loytring and La∣ziness, might easily frustrate and disap∣point Cupid of all his Designs, Aims, En∣gines, and Devices, and so disable and ap∣pall him, that his Bow, Quiver, and Darts should from thenceforth be a meer need∣less Load and Burthen to him: for that it could not then lie in his power to

strike, or wound any of either Sex, with all the Arms he had. He is not, I believe, so expert an Archer, as that he can hit the Cranes flying in the Air, or yet the young Stags skipping through the Thickets, as the Parthians knew well how to do; that is to say, People moyling, sinking, and hurrying up and down, restless, and with∣out repose. He must have those husht, still, quiet, lying at a stay, lither, and full of ease, whom he is able, though his Mo∣ther help him, to touch, much less to pierce with all his Arrows, in confirma∣tion hereof, Theophrastus being asked on a time, What kind of Beast or Thing he judged a toyish, wanton Love to be? he made Answer, That it was a Passion of idle and sluggish Spirits. From which pretty Description of ticking Love-tricks that of Diogenes's hatching was not very discrepant, when he defined Leachery, Occupation of Folks destitute of all other Occupation.

For this cause the Syconian Engraver, Ca∣nachus, being desirous to give us to under∣stand, that Sloath, Drouziness, Negli∣gence, and Laziness were the prime Guar∣dians and Governesses of Ribaldry, made the Statue of Venus (not standing, as other Stone-Cutters had used to do, but) sit∣ting.

Fourthly, The tickling pricks of Incon∣tinency are blunted by an eager Study; for from thence proceedeth an incredible resolution of the Spirits, that oftentimes there do not remain so many behind as may suffice to push and thrust forwards the Generative Resudation to the places thereto appropriated, and therewithal in∣••••ate the Cavernous Nerve; whose office is to ejaculate the Moisture for the Pro∣pagation of Humane Progeny. Least you should think it is not so, be pleased but to contemplate a little the Form, Fashion, and Carriage of a Man exceeding earnest∣ly set upon some Learned Meditation, and deeply plunged therein, and you shall see how all the Arteries of his Brains are stretched forth, and bent like the String of a Cross-bow, the more promptly, dexte∣rously, and copiously to suppeditate, fur∣nish, and supply him with store of Spirits, sufficient to replenish, and fill up the Ven∣tricles, Seats, Tunnels, Mansions, Rece∣ptacles, and Celluls of the common Sense; of the Imagination, Apprehension, and Fancy; of the Ratiocination, Arguing, and Resolution; as likewise of the Memo∣ry, Recordation, and Remembrance; and with great alacrity, nimbleness, and agility to run, pass, and course from the one to the other, through those Pipes, Windings,

and Conduits, which to skilful Anatomists are perceivable, at the end of the Wonder∣ful Net, where all the Arteries close in a terminating Point: which Arteries taking their rise and origine from the left Capsul of the Heart, bring through several Cir∣cuits, Ambages, and Anfractuosities, the Vital, to subtilize and refine them to the Aetherial Purity of Animal Spirits. Nay, in such a studiously musing Person, you may espy so extravagant Raptures of one, as it were, out of himself, that all his Na∣tural Faculties for that time will seem to be suspended from each their proper charge and office, and his exteriour Senses to be at a stand. In a word, you cannot o∣therways choose then think, that he is by an extraordinary Extasie quite transported out of what he was, or should be; and that Socrates did not speak improperly, when he said, That Philosophy was nothing else but a Medi∣tation upon Death. This possibly is the rea∣son, why Democritus deprived himself of the Sense of Seeing, prizing at a much lower rate the loss of his Sight, than the diminution of his Contemplations; which he frequently had found disturbed by the vagrant, flying-out strayings of his unset∣led and roving Eyes. Therefore is it, that Pallas, the Goddess of Wisdom, Tutress, and Guardianess of such as are diligently

studious, and painfully industrious, is, and hath been still accounted a Virgin. The Muses upon the same consideration are esteemed perpetual Maids: and the Graces for the like reason, have been held to con∣tinue in a sempiternal Pudicity.

I remember to have read, that Cupid on a time being asked of his Mother Ve∣nus, why he did not assault and set upon the Muses, his Answer was, That he found them so fair, so sweet, so fine, so neat, so wise, so learned, so modest, so discreet, so courteous, so vertuous, and so continually busied and em∣ployed: One in the Speculation of the Stars; another in the Supputation of Num∣bers; the Third in the Dimension of Geo∣metrical Quantities; the Fourth in the Composition of Heroick Poems; the Fifth in the jovial Interludes of a Comick Strain; the Sixth in the stately Gravity of a Tragick Vein; the Seventh in the Melo∣dious Disposition of Musical Airs; the Eighth in the compleatest manner of Wri∣ting Histories, and Books on all sorts of Subjects; and the Ninth in the Mysteries, Secrets, and Curiosities of all Sciences, Fa∣culties, Disciplines, and Arts whatsoever, whether Liberal or Mechanick; that ap∣proaching near unto them, he unbended his Bow, shut his Quiver, and extinguish∣ed his Torch, through meer shame and

fear, that by mischance he might do them some hurt or prejudice: which done, he thereafter put off the Fillet wherewith his Eyes were bound, to look them in the Face, and to hear their Melody and Poe∣tick Odes. There took he the greatest pleasure in the World; that many times he was transported with their Beauty and pretty Behaviour, and charmed asleep by the Harmony: so far was he from assault∣ing them, or interrupting their Studies. Under this Article may be comprised, what Hippocrates wrote in the aforecited Treatise concerning the Scythians, as also that in a Book of his entituled, Of Breed∣ing and Production; where he hath affirm∣ed, all such Men to be unfit for Genera∣tion, as have their Parotid Arteries cut; whose Situation is beside the Ears: for the reason given already, when I was speak∣ing of the resolution of the Spirits, and of that Spiritual Blood, whereof the Arte∣ries are the sole and proper Receptacles; and that likewise he doth maintain a large portion of the Parastatick Liquor, to issue and descend from the Brains and Back∣bone.

Fifthly, By the too frequent reiteration of the Act of Venery. There did I wai•• for you (quoth Panurge) and shall willing∣ly apply it to my self, whilst any one tha••

pleaseth may, for me, make use of any of the four preceding. That is the very same thing (quoth Fryar Ihon) which Fa∣ther Scyllino, Prior of Saint Victor, at Mar∣seilles, calleth by the Name of Maceration, and taming of the Flesh. I am of the same Opinion; and so was the Hermite of Saint Radegonde, a little above Chinon: for (quoth he) the Hermites of Thebaida can no more aptly or expediently macerate and bring down the Pride of their Bodies, daunt and mortifie their leacherous Sensuality, or depress and overcome the stubbornness and rebellion of the Flesh, then by dusling and fanferluching it Five and twenty, or Thirty times a day. I see Panurge, quoth Rondibilis, neatly featured, and propor∣tioned in all the Members of his Body, of a good temperament in his Humors, well complexioned in his Spirits, of a competent Age, in an opportune Time, and of a reasonably forward Mind to be married: truly, if he encounter with a Wife of the like Nature, Temperament, and Constitution, he may beget upon her Children worthy of some Transpontine Mo∣narchy; and the sooner he marry, it will be the better for him, and the more con∣ducible for his Profit, if he would see and have his Children in his own time well provided for. Sir, my worthy Master

(quoth Panurge) I will do it, do not you doubt thereof; and that quickly enough, I warrant you. Nevertheless, whilst you were busied in the utter∣ing of your Learned Discourse, this Flea which I have in mine Ear, hath tick∣led me more then ever. I retain you in the Number of my Festival Guests, and promise you, that we shall not want for Mirth, and Good Chear e∣nough; yea, over and above the or∣dinary Rate. And, if it may please you, desire your Wife to come along with you, together with her She-Friends and Neighbours: That is to be understood, and there shall be fair Play.