The second book of the works of Mr. Francis Rabelais, Doctor in Physick treating of the heroick deeds and sayings of the good Pantagruel. Written originally in the French tongue, and now faithfully translated into English. By S.T.U.C.

CHAP. X. How Pantagruel judged so equitably of a Contro∣versie, which was wonderfully obscure and difficult: that by reason of his just de∣cree therein, he was reputed to have a most admirable judgement. (Book 10)

PAntagruel, very well remembring his fathers letter and admonitions, would one day make trial of his knowledge. There∣upon in all the Carrefours, that is, throughout all the foure quarters, streets and corners of the City, he set up Conclusions to the num∣ber of nine thousand seven hundred sixty and foure, in all manner of learning, touching in them the hardest doubts that are in any sci∣ence. And first of all, in the fodder-street he held dispute against all the Regents or Fel∣lowes of Colledges, Artists or Masters of Arts, and Oratours, and did so gallantly, that he overthrew them, and set them all upon their tailes, he went afterwards to the Sor∣bone, where he maintained argument against all the Theol••gians or Divines, for the space of six weeks, from foure a clock in the morn∣ing, until six in the evening, except an inter∣val of two houres to refresh themselves, and

take their repast: and at this were present the greatest part of the Lords of the Court, the Masters of Requests, Presidents, Counsel∣lors, those of the Accompts, Secretaries, Ad∣vocates and others: as also the Sheriffes of the said town, with the Physicians and Pro∣fessors of the canon-law; amongst which it is to be remarked, that the greatest part were stubborn jades, and in their opinions obstinate; but he took such course with them, that for all their Ergo's and fallacies, he put their backs to the wall, gravelled them in the deepest questions, and made it visibly appear to the world, that compared to him, the•• were but monkies, and a knot of mufled calves: Whereupon, every body began to keep a bustling noise, and talk of his so mar∣vellous knowledge, through all degrees of persons in both sexes, even to the very Laun∣dresses, Brokers, Rostmeat-sellers, Penknife▪ makers and others, who, when he past along in the street, would say, This is he; in which he took delight, as Demosthenes, the Prince of Greek Oratours did, when an old crouch∣ing wife, pointing at him with her fingers, said, That is the man.

Now at this same very time there was a processe or suit in law, depending in Court between two great Lords, of which one was called my Lord Kissebreech, Plaintiffe of one side, and the other my Lord Suckfist, De∣fendant

of the other; whose Controversie was so high and difficult in Law, that the Court of Parliament could make nothing of it. And therefore by the Command∣ment of the King, there were assembled foure of the greatest, and most learned of all the Par∣liaments of France, together with the great Councel, and all the principal Regents of the Universities, not only of France, but of Eng∣land also and Italy, such as Iason, Philippus-Decius, Petrus de Petronibus, and a rabble of other old Rabbinists: who being thus met together, after they had thereupon consult∣ed for the space of six and fourty weeks, finding that they could not fasten their teeth in it, nor with such clearnesse understand the case, as that they might in any manner of way be able to right it, or take up the differ∣ence berwixt the two aforesaid Parties, it did so grievously vex them, that they most vil∣lanously conshit themselves for shame. In this great extremity, one amongst them na∣med Du Douhait, the learnedst of all, and more expert and prudent then any of the rest, whilest one day they were thus at their wits end, all-to-be-dunced and philogrobo∣lized in their braines, said unto them: We have been here (my Masters,) a good long space without doing any thingelse, then trifle away both our time and money, and can ne∣verthelesse finde neither brim nor bottome in

this matter; for the more we study about it, the lesse we understand therein, which is a great shame and disgrace to us, and a heavy burthen to our consciences; yea such, that in my opinion we shall not rid our selves of it without dishonour, unlesse we take some other course; for we do nothing but doat in our consultations.

See therefore what I have thought upon▪ you have heard much talking of that worthy personage named Master Pantagruel, who hath been found to be learned above the ca∣pacity of this present age, by the proofs he gave in those great disputations, which he held publickly against all men: my opinion is, that we send for him, to conferre with him about this businesse; for never any man will encompasse the bringing of it to an end, if he do it not.

Hereunto all the Counsellors and Doctors willingly agreed, and according to that their result having instantly sent for him, they in∣treated him to be pleased to canvass the pro∣cesse, and sift it throughly, that after a deep search and narrow examination of all the points thereof, he might forthwith make the report unto them, such as he shall think good in true and legal knowledge: to this effect they delivered into his hands the bags where∣in were the Writs and Pancarts concerning that suit, which for bulk and weight were

almost enough to lade foure great couillard or stoned Asses; but Pantagruel said unto them, Are the two Lords, between whom this debate and processe is, yet living? it was answered him, Yes: To what a devil then (said he,) serve so many paultry heapes, and bundles of papers and copies which you give me? is it not better to heare their Con∣troversie from their own mouthes, whilest they are face to face before us, then to reade these vile fopperies, which are nothing but trumperies, deceits, diabolical cosenages of Cepola, pernicious slights and subversions of equity? for I am sure, that you, and all those thorough whose hands this processe hath past, have by your devices added what you could to it pro & contra▪ in such sort, that although their difference perhaps was clear and easie enough to determine at first, you have obscured it, and made it more intricate, by the frivolous, sot∣tish, unreasonable and foolish reasons, and opi∣nions of Accursius, Baldus, Bartolus, de castro, de imola, Hippolytus, Panormo, Bertachin, A∣lexander, Curtius, and those other old Ma∣stiffs, who never understood the least law of the Pandects, they being but meer block∣heads & great tithe-calvs, ignorant of all that which was needful for the understanding of the lawes; for (as it is most certain) they had not the knowledge either of the Greek or La∣tine tongue, but only of the Gothick and Bar∣barian;

the lawes neverthelesse were first taken from the Greeks, according to the testi∣mony of Ulpian. l. poster. de origine juris, which we likewise may perceive by that all the lawes are full of Greek words and senten∣ces: and then we finde that they are reduced into a Latine stile, the most elegant and or∣nate, that whole language is able to afford, without excepting that of any that ever wrote therein; nay, not of Salust, Varo, Ci∣cero, Seneca, Titus Livius, nor Quintilian: how then could these old dotards be able to understand aright the text of the lawes, who never in their time had looked upon a good Latine book, as doth evidently enough ap∣pear by the rudenesse of their stile, which is fitter for a Chimney-sweeper, or for a Cook or a Scullion, then for a Jurisconsult and Do∣ctor in the Lawes.

Furthermore, seeing the Lawes are ex∣cerpted out of the middle of moral and natu∣ral Philosophie, how should these fooles have understood it, that have by G—studied lesse in Philosophie then my Mule? in respect of humane learning, and the knowledge of An∣tiquities and History, they were truly laden with those faculties as a toad is with fea∣thers: and yet of all this the Lawes are so full, that without it they cannot be under∣stood, as I intend more fully to shew unto you in a peculiar Treatise, which on that pur∣pose

I am about to publish. Therefore if you will that I take any medling in this pro-: cesse; first, cause all these papers to be burnt: secondly, make the two Gentlemen come personally before me; and afterwards, when I shall have heard them, I will tell you my opinion freely without any feignednes or dis∣simulation whatsoever.

Some amongst them did contradict this motion, as you know that in all companies there are more fooles then wise men, and that the greater part alwayes surmounts the bet∣ter, as saith Titus Livius, in speaking of the Carthaginians: but the foresaid Du Douet held the contrary opinion, maintaining that Pantagruel had said well, and what was right, in affirming that these records, bills of in∣quest, replies, rejoinders, exceptions, depo∣sitions, and other such diableries of truth-in∣tangling Writs, were but Engines where∣with to overthrow justice, and unnecessarily to prolong such suits as did depend before them; and that therefore the devil would car∣ry them all away to hell, if they did not take another course, and proceeded not in times coming according to the Prescripts of Evan∣gelical and Philosophical equity. In fine, all the papers were burnt, and the two Gentle∣men summoned and personally convented; at whose appearance before the Court, Pan∣tagruel said unto them, Are you they that

have this great difference betwixt you? Yes, (my Lord) said they: Which of you (said Pantagruel,) is the Plaintiffe? It is I, said my Lord Kissebreech: Go to then, my friend, (said he) and relate your matter unto me from point to point, according to the real truth, or else (by cocks body) if I finde you to lie so much as in one word, I will make you shorter by the head, and take it from off your shoul∣ders, to shew others by your example, that in justice and judgement men ought to speak nothing but the truth; therefore take heed you do not adde nor impare any thing in the Narration of your case. Begin.