The works of the famous Mr. Francis Rabelais, doctor in physick treating of the lives, heroick deeds, and sayings of Gargantua and his son Pantagruel : to which is newly added the life of the author / written originally in French, and translated into English by Sr. Thomas Urchard.

CHAP. VII. (Book 7)

How Pantagruel came to Paris, and of the choise Books of the Library of St. Victor. (Book 7)

AFter that Pantagruel had studied very well at Orleans, he resolved to see the great University at Paris; but before his de∣parture, he was informed that there was a huge big bell at St. Anian in the said town of Orleans, under the ground, which had been

there above two hundred and fourteen years; for it was so great that they could not by any device get it so much as above the ground, although they used all the meanes that are found in Vitruvius de Architectura, Albertus de re aedificatoria, Euclid, Theon, Archimedes, and Hero de ingeniis: for all that was to no purpose, wherefore condescending heartily to the humble request of the Citizens and In∣habitants of the said Town, he determined to remove it to the tower that was erected for it: with that he came to the place where it was, and lifted it out of the ground with his little finger, as easily as you would hav•• done a Hawks bell, or Bell-weathers tingle tangle: but before he would carry it to the foresaid tower or steeple appointed for it, he would needs make some Musick with it about the Town, and ring it alongst all the streets, as, he carried it in his hand, wherewith all the people were very glad; but there happened one great inconveniency, for with carrying it so, and ringing it about the streets, all the good Orleans wine turned instantly, waxed flat, and was spoiled, which no body there did perceive till the night following; for eve∣ry man found himself so altered, and a dry with drinking these flat wines, that they did nothing but spit, and that as white as Maltha cotton, saying: We have of the Pantagruel, and our very throats are salted. This done, he came

to Paris with his retinue, and at his entry e∣very one came out to see him, (as you know well enough, that the people of Paris is sot∣tish by nature, by B. flat, and B. sharp,) and beheld him with great astonishment, mixed with no lesse feare, that he would carry away the Palace into some other countrey à remo∣tis, and farre from them, as his father former∣ly had done the great peal of Bells at our Ladies Church, to tie about his Mares neck. Now after he had stayed there a pretty space, and studied very well in all the seven liberal Arts, he said it was a good towne to live in, but not to die; for that the grave-digging rogues of St. Innocent, used in frostie nights to warme their bums with dead mens bones. In his abode there he found the Library of St. Victor, a very stately and magnifick one, especially in some books which were there, of which followeth the Repertory and Ca∣talogue; Et primò,

• The for Godsake of salvation.
• The Codpiece of the Law.
• The Slipshoe of the Decretals.
• The Pomegranate of vice.
• The Clew-bottom of Theologie.
• The Duster or foxtail-flap of Preachers, Composed by Turlupin.
• The churning Ballock of the Valiant:
• The Henbane of the Bishops.
• ...

• Marmoretus de baboonis & apis, cum Com∣mento Dorbellis.
• Decretum Universitatis Parisiensis super gor∣giasitate muliercularum ad placitum.
• The Apparition of Sancte Geltrud, to a Nun of Poissie, being in travel, at the bring∣ing forth of a childe.
• Ars honestè fartandi in societate per Marcum Corvinum.
• The mustard-pot of penance.
• The Gamashes, aliàs the boots of patience.
• Formicarium artium.
• De brodiorum usu, & honestate quartandi per Sylvestrem prioratem Jacobinum.
• The coosened, or gulled in Court.
• The Fraile of the Scriveners.
• The Marriage-packet.
• The cruzie or crurible of Contemplation.
• The Flimflams of the Law.
• The Prickle of Wine.
• The Spurre of Cheese.
• Ruboffatorium scolarium.
• Tartaretus de modo cacandi.
• The Bravades of Rome.
• Bricot de differentiis Browsarum.
• The tail-piece-cushion, or close-breech of Discipline.
• The cobled Shoe of Humility.
• The Trevet of good thoughts.
• The Kettle of Magnanimity.
• The cavilling intanglements of Confessors.
• ...

• The Snatchfare of the Curats.
• Reverendi patris fratris Lubini provincialis Slabrardiae de gulpendis lardslicionibus li∣bri tres.
• Pasquilli doctor is marmorei de capreolis cum ar∣tichoket a comedendis tempore Papali ab Ecclesia interdicto.
• The invention of the Holy Crosse, persona∣ted by six wilie Priests.
• The Spectacles of Pilgrims bound for Rome.
• Majoris de modo faciendi Puddinos.
• The Bagpipe of the Prelates.
• Beda de optimitate triparum.
• The complaint of the Barresters upon the reformation of Confites.
• The furred Cat of the Sollicitors and At∣turneys.
• Of pease and bacon cum Commento.
• The small vales or drinking money of the In∣dulgences.
• Praeclarissimi juris utriusque Doctoris Maistre pilloti, &c.
• Scrapfarthingi de botchandis glossaccursianae Trif••is repetitio enncidiluculissima
• Stratagemata francharchaeri de Baniolet.
• Carlbumpkinus de re militari cum figuris Tevoti.
• De usu & utilitate flayandi equos & equas au∣thore Magistro nostro de quebecu.
• The sawcinesse of Countrey-Stuarts.
• M. N. Rostocostojan Bedanesse de mustarda

• post prandium servienda, libri quatuordecim apostillati per M. Vaurillonis.
• The covillage or wench-tribute of Pro∣mooters.
• Quaestio fubtilissima, utrum Chimaera in vacuo bombizant posset comedere secundas intenti∣ones, & fuit debatuta per decem hebdo∣madas in Constlio Constantiensi.
• The bridle-champer of the Advocates.
• Smutchudlamenta Scoti.
• The rasping and hard-scraping of the Car∣dinals. De calcaribus removendis Deca∣des undecim per M. Albericum de rosata.
• Ejusdem de castramentandis criminibus li∣bri tres.
• The entrance of Antonie de leve into the ter∣ritories of Brasil.
• De peelandis aut unskinnandis blurrandisque Cardinalium mulis.
• The said Authors Apologie against those who alledge that the Popes mule doth eat but at set times.
• Prognosticatio quae incipit Silvitriquebillobalata per M. N. the deep dreaming gull Sion.
• Bondarini Episcopi de emulgentiarum profecti∣bus Aeneades novem, cum privilegio Pa∣pali ad triennium & postca non.
• The shitabranna of the maids.
• The bald arse or peel'd breech of the widows.
• The cowle or capouch of the Monks.
• ...

• The mumbling devotion of the Coelestine Fryars.
• The passage-toll of beggarlinesse.
• The teeth-chatter or gum-didder of lubberly lusks.
• The paring-shovel of the Theologues.
• The drench-horne of the Masters of Arts.
• The scullians of Oleam the uninitiated Clerk.
• Magistri N. lickdishetis de garbellisiftationibus horarum canon carum libri quadriginta ar∣siversit atorium confratriarum in∣certo authore.
• The gulsgoatonie or rasher of Cormorants and ravenous feeders.
• The rammishnesse of the Spaniards supergi∣vure gondigaded by Fryar Indigo.
• The muttring of pitiful wretches.
• Dastardismus rerum Italicarum, authore Ma∣gistro Burnegad.
• R. Lu llius de batisfolagiis Principum.
• Calibistratorium caffardiae, authore M. Jacobo hocstraten hereticometrâ.
• Codtickler de magistro nostrandorum magistro nostratorúmque beneventi librî octo ga∣lantissimi.
• The Crackarades of balists or stone-throw∣ing Engines, contrepate Clerks, Scrive∣ners, Brief-writers, Rapporters, and Papal Bull-dispatchers lately com∣piled by Regis.
• A perpetual Almanack for those that have the gowt and the pox,
• ...

• Manera sweepandi fornacellos per Mag. ecciam.
• The shable or cimeterre of Merchants.
• The pleasures of the Monachal life.
• The hotchpot of Hypocrites.
• The history of the Hobgoblins.
• The ragamuffianisme of the pensionary maimed souldiers.
• The gulling fibs and counterfeit shewes of Commissaries.
• The litter of Treasurers.
• The juglingatorium of Sophisters.
• Antipericata metanaparbeuged amphisistationes toordieantium.
• The periwinkle of ballad-makers.
• The push-forward of the Alchimists.
• The niddie noddie of the sachel-loaded seek∣ers by Friar Bindfastatis.
• The shackles of Religion.
• The racket of swag-waggers.
• The leaning-stock of old age.
• The muzzle of Nobility.
• The Apes pater noster.
• The Crickets and Hawks bells of Devotion.
• The pot of the Emberweeks.
• The mortar of the politick life.
• The flap of the Hermites.
• The riding-hood or Monterg of the Peni∣tentiaries.
• The trictrac of the knocking Friars.
• Blockheadodus de vita & honestate bragado∣chiorum.
• ...

• Lyrippii Sorbonici moralisationes per M. Lu∣poldum.
• The Carrier-horse-bells of Travellers.
• The bibbings of the tipling Bishops.
• Dolloporediones Doctorum Coloniensium ad∣versus Reuclin.
• The Cymbals of Ladies.
• The Dungers martingale.
• Whirlingfriskorum Chasemarkerorum per fra∣trem Crackwoodloguetis.
• The clouted patches of a stout heart.
• The mummerie of the racket-keeping Robin-good-fellows.
• Gerson de auferibilitate Papae ab Ecclesia.
• The Catalogue of the nominated and gra∣duated persons.
• Jo. Dyrebrodii de terribilitate excommuni∣cationis libellus acephalos.
• Ingeniositas invocandi diabolos & diabolas per M. Guingolphum.
• The hotchpotch or gallimafree of the perpe∣tually begging Friars.
• The morrish-dance of the Hereticks.
• The whinings of Cajetan.
• Muddisnowt Doctoris cherubici de origine roughfootedarum & wryneckedorum ri∣tibus libri septem.
• Sixty nine fat breviaries.
• The night-Mare of the five orders of Beggars.
• The skinnery of the new start-ups extracted

• out of the fallow butt, incornifistibula∣ted and plodded upon in the Ange∣lick summe.
• The raver and idle talker in cases of con∣science.
• The fat belly of the Presidents.
• The bafling flowter of the Abbots.
• Sutoris adversus eum qui vocaverat eum Slab∣sauceatorem, & quod slabsauceatores non sunt damnati ab Ecclesia.
• Cacatorium medicor••••m.
• The chimney-sweeper of Astrologie.
• Campi clysteriorum per paragraph. C.
• The bumsquicbracker of Apothecaries.
• The kissebreech of Chirurgerie.
• Iustinianus de whiteleperotis tollendis.
• Antidotarium animae.
• Merlinus Coccaius de patria diabolorum.
• The Practice of iniquity by Cleuraunes sadden.
• The Mirrour of basenesse by Radnecu Wal∣denses.
• The ingrainedrogue by Dwarsencas Eldenu.
• The mercilesse Cormor ant by Hoxinidno the Jew.

Of which Library some books are already printed, and the rest are now at the Presse, in this noble City of Tubinge.