Plautus's comedies ... made English, with critical remarks upon each play.

SCENE III.

Enter Stratippocles and Cheribulus, at another part of the Stage.

Stra.

Thus I've told ye the whole Story, Cheribulus; and given ye a full Account o' my Troubles and Love.

Che.

Sure, Stratippocles, thour't very childish for one o' thy Age and Courage. What, asham'd o' thy Bar∣gan, Man, when she's one of a good Family? Who a duce can blame thee for this?

Stra.

All those who envy'd me, ha' declared them∣selves m' Enemies upo' this Account; tho' truly to her Chastity, I ne'r offer'd the least Violence or Incivility.

Che.

This is a Vertue, in my Opinion, a degree a∣bove any common moderation in Love.

Stra.

Po, Words will give no ease to a Man in pain: He's the Friend, whose Actions supply one in a puzling Case, and at a pinch.

Che.

How wou'd y' ha' me help ye?

Stra.

By lending me a hundred Pounds, to pay off the Banker I had it of.

Che.

Really if I had it, you shou'dn't ask me twice.

Stra.

What am I the better, when your Liberality lies wholly in Words, and nothing at all in Deed•…•….

Che.

Why, Faith, every day I'm teaz'd, and wor∣ried to death with a parcel o' Duns.

Stra.

I'de sooner see such Friends starve in Prison than live in a Palace.—Well, I must borrow Epidi∣cus's help, tho' I pay dearly for th' use of 't; but I shall send him to Bridewel with his Skin stript o're his Ears, if he doesn't procure the hundred Pounds as soon as the last Word's pronounc'd.

Epi. aside.]

I'm in a hopeful Condition: He promi∣ses well, and I don't question his performance i' the

least. So then, my Back shall be nobly treated, and all at free Cost.—I'll e'n board 'em.—

[Goes to them.]

My dear Master, no Man's more joyful at your safe Ar∣rival than your humble Servant Epidicus.

Stra. turning about]

Where's he?

Epi.

Here, Sir—I'm glad to see you well in Town agen.

Stra.

I don't question but y'are, as much as my self.

Epi.

Have ye been well all this time, Sir.

Stra.

In Body, but not in Mind.

Epi.

Why, Sir, I perform'd my Duty, and observ'd your Commands, to a tittle. I've bought up the Girl you sent so many Letters about.

Stra.

You've lost your Labour i' that.

Epi.

Lost, how, Sir?

Stra.

Because at present, she neither charms, nor pleases me.

Epi.

Then what occasion was there for so many re∣peated Commands, and Letters?

Stra.

I lov'd her then, but now my Heart's other∣wise ingag'd.

Epi.

Faith 'tis very hard, t'have one's Services so ill rewarded. My best Endeavours are turn'd against me, by the fickleness o' your Passion.

Stra.

I wasn't Compos mentis, when I writ those Let∣ters.

Epi.

Must I attone for your crazy Tricks; and my Back pay the price o' your Indiscretion?

Stra.

What's all this prating? I've occasion for a hundred Pounds down o' the Nail, which must be paid to the Banker with all Expedition.

Epi.

Pray, where shall I ha't? Of what Banker shou'd I take it up?

Stra.

Where you please. But if I ha'n't the Mony before Sunset, ne'r expect to see home agen, but strait to Bridewell you go.

Epi.

You, Sir, can talk o' these things unmov'd, without dread or danger. I'm right sensible o' m' Ex∣ecutioners, and the pain of a good Beating.

Stra.

How then? Wou'd you see your Master make way with himself?

Epi.

Not so neither.—I'll first run the hazard, as bold as it is.

Stra.

Now I like ye: Thour't a brave Fellow in∣troth.

Epi.

I'm resolv'd t' undergo what you'd ha' me.

Stra.

What will ye do with the Musick-Girl you bought then?

Epi.

I'll warrant ye, I'll ha' some Invention, some Expedient, or some Trick to save all at last.

Stra.

Faith thous't a fruitful Noddle, to my Know∣ledge.

Epi.

I know a rich Euboan Captain, with Mony at Command, who when he comes to know o' your buy∣ing of this, and your bringing home th' other, he'll earn estly be at ye, to take her off your Hands.—But where's the Girl you brought wi'ye.

Stra.

She shall be forth-coming.

Che.

What stay we here for?

Stra.

Let's to yours, and there make a jolly Day on't.

[Exeunt Stratippocles and Cheribulus.