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Madam, I hear I live in your good Opinion.
Your merits do.
I hope if you do esteem my merits, if I have merits to be esteem'd, you will not despise my Person, nor deny my Sute.
I esteem of your person for your merits sake, and those that have merits, and are worthy, will make no ignoble Sute: wherefore I may grant it before I know it.
My Sute is, to accept of me for your Husband.
I shall not deny to be your Wife.
Well met, Monsieur Heroical, and Madamoiselle Ambition.
Now we are all met, how shall we pass the time away?
Nay rather, how shall we recreate our time?
Let us sit and declare what we love or hate.
Agreed,
Shall we declare our love or our hate first?
Our love first.
Nay faith let love close up our discourse.
Then let hate be the Gentleman-Usher.
She will usher you into foul ways.
Let her usher us into as foul ways as she will, we will fol∣low her.
Begin, begin.
I hate poverty: for that dejects the Spirits, and oppresseth the Life.
I hate falshood: for that deceives my Reason, and blind-folds my Senses.
I hate a fool, because he obstructs my Understanding, and sets my Brain on the Rack.
I hate noise, because it disturbs my thoughts, hurts my hearing, and buries sense, reason, and auricular words.
I hate sickness, because it is a friend to Death.
I hate vain follies, because they bring neither content, pleasure, nor profit.
I hate a Court, because it puts Modesty out of countenance, Patience out of humour, and Merit out of favour.
I hate a slavish Peace, because there is no imployment for noble active spirits.
I hate truth, because it tells me my faults.
I hate truth, because it hinders my search thereof.
I hate motion, because therein there is no rest.
I hate rest, because it makes no Inquiries.
I hate life, because therein is more pain and trouble than plea∣sure or peace.
I hate restraint, because it inslaves life.
I hate a Nunnery, because it doth not only restrain, but bar out Sex from the sight of men.
Thou lovest men well, that their very sight delights thee.
I hate light, because it discovers Lovers.
I hate darkness, because it conceals Adulteries.
I hate a chaste Beauty, because she quenches my hopes, and inflames my desires.
I hate Madamoiselle la Belle, because Monsieur Sensuality did like her.
I hate Age: for that vades Beauty, and banishes Lovers.
No more of Age and Hate, take Love without Beauty.
Mother Matron would have you take her.
Nay faith we will leave Mother Matron, and begin with Love.
I love plenty: for in plenty lives happiness.
I love freedom: for in freedom lives pleasure.
By your favour, Plenty may want happiness, and Freedom pleasure.
I love to go to Church.
What, to hear a Sermon?
No, to meet a Mistris.
Out upon thee thou Reprobate, would you make a Church a Bawdy-house?
No, I would make that place where Beauties were, a Church, and the fairest should be the Godess I would pray to.
There are not any that are fair will hear you.
And those that are foul I will not pray to.
Follow Love: for that makes all things fair and pleasing.
I love silence: for in silence my life lives easily, my thoughts freely, and my mind harmoniously.
Sometimes the thoughts disturb the mind, and so the life, more than noise disturbs the thoughts.
I love Honour: for in Honour lives Respect.
I love Beauty: for in Beauty lives admiration.
I love Fame: for in Fame lives the memory of the best of my Actions.
I love power: for in power lives Adorations.
I love Wit: for that delights my self, and recreates my friends.
I love Eloquence: for that delights my Ear.
But Eloquence will deceive your Judgment, delude your Understanding, and flatter your Passions with insinuating perswasions, and will draw you into an Erroneous Belief, and by that unto unjust actions.
I love Madamoiselle Portrait.
I love Monsieur Sensuality.
I love Madamoiselle Ambition.
I love Monsieur Heroick.
I love Madamoiselle Bon' Esprit.
I love Monsieur Satyrical.
I love Madamoiselle Superbe.
I love Monsieur Vain-glorious.
I love Madamoiselle Pleasure.
I love Monsieur Tranquillitous Peace.
I love Madamoiselle Faction.
I love Monsieur Censure.
I love ma filia Excess.
I love Monsieur Busie.
I love ma filia Wanton.
I love Monsieur Liberty.
I love a single life: for in Mariage lives too much trouble to live in Ease.
I love to continue a Widow: for Temperance is banish'd from most places and persons.
I love Monsieur Frisk; but Monsieur Frisk loves not me.
Faith I'll perswade him to love, if not thy person, yet thy wealth; for thou art rich, and he hath hardly enough means to bear up his Gentility: Besides, one Maid and one Widow is enough, more would be too much.
And one Batchelour.
Who's that?
Monsieur Inquisitive.
Faith 'tis fit and proper he should live a Batchelour: for an In∣quisitive Husband would not be good, neither for his own sake, nor his Wifes.
But Gentlemen and Ladies, although you all say you love such a Lady, and such a Lady loves such a Gentleman, yet you do not say you will marry each other.
You may be sure, if we do publickly profess love, we intend to marry: for though we may love and not marry, or marry and not love, yet not profess it in an open Assembly; for Love without Mariage lives incognito.
But mariage without love is visible enough: for it lies to the view of all their neighbours knowledge.
Well, noble Gentlemen, and vertuous Ladies, if you resolve all to marry, I would advise you to marry all in one day.
O Madam Temperance, you are sick.
Why?
By reason healthful temperance never gives such surfetting coun∣sel: for there are as many of us as might be marying a year, and keeping their Festivals, and you would have all marry'd in one day.
Madam Temperance means, she would have a whole year as one Wedding-day
And one Wedding-day to the Bride and Bridegroom, is as one whole year.
Not to every Bride and Bridegroom: for on my Conscience Monsieur Frisk, if he should marry Mother Matron, will think his Wedding-day but a minute long.
But Mother Matron will think the day an Age.
You speak so loud, she'l hear you.
O no, for the most part she is deaf: for she many times stops wool into her ears to keep out the cold.
I hear that Wits Cabal is removing out of Cupids Court into Hymens prison, and there to be bound in bonds of Matrimony.
Faith I pity the Cabal, and condemn their Wit, by reason it did not keep them out of slavery.
Wit is both a Pander and a Traitor: for Wit is a Pimp in Cu∣pids Court, and betrays his Court to Hymens Prison.
There are no prisoners look so dejectedly as Hymens prisoners.
There is great reason for it: for they are almost starv'd for want of variety, and they have less liberty than other prisoners have.
You hear of the great Mariages that are concluded on, and they are to be dispatch'd out of hand.
Hear of them (say you) I must stop my Ears, and shut my Eyes, if I did not both hear and see their preparations: for all the Tradesmen are so busily imploy'd, as if they were never to sell or work more after these Ma∣riages.
What Tradesmen are those?
Why Taylors, Shoomakers, Hosiers, Seamstresses, Feather-men, Periwig-makers, Perfumers, Clothiers, Linnengers, Silk men, Mercers, Mil∣leners, Haberdashers, Curlers, Spurriers, Sadlers, Coach-makers, Uphol∣storers, besides Confectioners, Cooks, Bakers, Brewers, Butchers, Poulterers, and twenty more I cannot think of.
They will kill and destroy so many creatures for their Feasts, that they will make a massacre.
A Famine I think:
But there will be great dancings at the Court they say: for three will be Masks, Plays, Balls, and such braveries as never was.
These publick Weddings, and such publick Revellings, put the Gentry to more charges, than many times they are able to spare; which if it were not for Revelling, there would be no need of such vain and idle Ex∣pences.
I mean to be at some charges, as to make me a new Suit or two of Cloaths.
Faith I will spare my purse, and stay at home.
Where will you keep your Wedding-Feast?
We will keep ours at the Court.
So will we.
And so will we.
And so will we.
If you please, Mistris, we will keep ours in the Country.
I approve of it.
If my Mistris agree, we will keep ours at the Play-house, and feast and dance upon the Stage.
I agree and approve of your Choice.
An Ordinary, or Tavern, is a more commodious place for the Society of the Wits: for I am sure all the Wits will meet there.
But if an Ordinary, or Tavern, be more commodious, yet they are not so publick places as the Theaters of Players; so that Wits may be merrier and freer in a Tavern, but not so divulged as on a Stage in a Play-House.
The truth is, an Ordinary or Tavern is a more proper place for Monsieur Sensuality and his Mistris to keep their Wedding-Feast, than for Monsieur Satyrical and his Mistris.
By your favour, the most proper place for us is the Court.
I think that an Hospitable Gentlemans House in the Country, is most proper for Monsieur Sensuality to keep his Wedding-Feast in.
That is a more proper place for Liberty and Wanton.
Nay, by your favour, another House (which shall be nameless, for fear of offending) is fitter for them.
My Honey sweet Love, where shall we keep our Wedding-Feast?
For your sake, my Sugar-sweeting, we will keep it in Bedlam, and Monsieur Busie and his Bride shall keep us company.
Thou art a very wag, my Love.
W' are all agreed.
Pray Jove we speed.