Two new playes ... written by Tho. Middleton, Gent.

Scaen. 1.

Enter Guardiano and Ward.

Guard.

SPeak, hast thou any sence of thy abuse? Do'st thou know what wrong's done thee?

Ward.

I wear an Ass else. I cannot wash my face, but I am feeling on't.

Guard.

Here take this Galtrop, then convey it se∣cretly Into the place I shew'd you; look you Sir, This is the trap-door to't.

Ward.

I know't of old Uncle, since the last tri∣umph; here rose up a Devil with one eye I remember, with a company of fire-works at's tail.

Guard.

Prethee leave squibbing now, mark me, and fail not; but when thou hear'st me give a stamp, down with't: The villain's caught then.

Ward.

If I miss you, hang me; I love to catch a villain, and your stamp shall go currant I warrant you: But how shall I rise up, and let him down too? All at one hole! that will be a horrible puzzle. You know I have a part in't, I play Slander.

Guard.

True, but never make you ready for't.

Ward.

No, my clothes are bought and all, and a foul Fiends head with a long contumelious tongue

i'th' chaps on't, a very fit shape for Slander i'th' out-parishes.

Guard.

It shall not come so far, thou understandst it not.

Ward

Oh, oh!

Guard.

He shall lie deep enough ere that time, And stick first upon those▪

Ward.

Now I conceive you Gardiner.

Guard.

Away, list to the privy stamp, that's all thy part:

Ward.

Stamp my Horns in a Morter if I miss you, and give the powder in White-wine to sick Cuckolds, a very present remedy for the head-ach.

Exit Ward.

Guard.

If this should any way miscarry now, As if the fool be nimble enough, 'tis certain, The Pages that present the swift wing'd Cupids, Are taught to hit him with their shafts of love, Fitting his part, which I have cunningly poyson'd; He cannot 'scape my fury; and those ills Will be laid all on Fortune, not our Wills, That's all the sport on't; for who will imagine, That at the celebration of this night Any mischance that hap's, can flow from spight?

Exit.

Florish: