COme Gentlemen, since you are pleas'd to honour me with acting my little Essay of fancy, please you to retire and dress, for they are ready to enter.

Worthy Sir, we follow you—

I shall attend you within.

By Mercury, a neat contrivance, Sir Gregory I applaud your wit.

Tis a profound device, an extravagant fancy, and an insupportable design; and Sir Gregory, I am in an intolle∣rable Consternation of your Penicranium—

This will be a brave opportunity to affront her for deceiving us—are all perfect in their parts, Rail and spare not, for that is all that we are like to have for our Expences on the Jilting Widow.

I am ready in mine—

And mine is in Capite.

Let us in to dress then—Widow, look too't, we'll all your scorns repay.

Your Sun of Joys shall be Eclips'd to day.

Your Market shall be marr'd too, as they say—

But prithee tell me, art thou in earnest, my Sister?

So our ill fate will have it, but so much I love, that I cou'd wish I were not.

Pox on Kindred—like noble Savage, I wou'd range and choose my Mistress where I pleas'd—now must sacred Love be curb'd, and pleasures lost, and all long of dull fanta∣stick Law.

We must submit, for Reason tells us it wou'd be a Sin, should we pursue our Love—

Friend, I can but pitty thy misfortunes in losing of a Mistress, but must congratulate your Joyes in finding of a Sister. Now, fair Eugenia, shall I at last receive the fair reward for all my Constancy? speak kindly, and return my love with yours—and then I'm happy—

Faith Madam, yield—do not cast away a handsom proper man, for so small a toy; my Sister here has bin more kind to me, than hitherto you have prov'd to him—

My Aunts to rule my fate, and I must choose a Hus∣band with her liking, I'le make it known to her, and if she approves of it, Heav'n knows, I can enjoy no greater happi∣ness— for without blushing, I confess, I love—

Oh my kind Saint!

Sanders, to your Post, see where they come—But do'st hear, prithee do not make love to her, for by Heav'n, tho she's my Sister, I shall grow wondrous Jealous, and conse∣quently quarrelsom.

Come my long wisht for Lady, your happy return is a second feast to me.

Ye'are all most freely welcom—

We thank you, Sir—

But is my Brother, do you say, so much in love with my Widow?

I overheard him but now complaining on his destiny that should make him so desperately in love with your Enemy, that I thought he would have rebelled against himself, there's such a mighty feud between the two old Enemies in his Breast, Love and Honour.

Lass poor man—I wish he had my place to day, he is abler than I to perform the duty that belongs to a young Widow.

Come Gentlemen, pray sit—that worthy friend of yours, Madam, is pleased to entertain us for a while, and now I suppose they are ready to enter—

Madam, here you may before-hand read the Argu∣ment of what I do design—Now Love, prove but so kind to inspire her with an equal slame, make her a true Widow, and my young Spark I shall soon grast on your Stock—

Ha, what's here? a Letter inclos'd, this must be conceal'd till a fitter time to be read—

Good, she has convey'd the Letter as I cou'd wish, now half my toyle is over—Madam, they are Entering—

Heart! Who should this be?—Some Rogue— but I'le let'em take their swing—and afterwards will be fully Reveng'd.

Upon my word, Monsieur Fire is a notable hot Sati∣rical Blade—

What should my Brother mean to rail so—

'Tis so, some Rascal's crept in on purpose to disgrace me; but I'm resolv'd they shall share in my disgrace—

By Gog Magog, a notable sharp Air this, Madam—

He has perfumed the Room well—

A man may smell her meaning two Rooms off, tho his Nose wanted reparations—

Prithee step out, and knovv vvhat his meaning is, is this the Entertainment I promised to my self?—

His love sure has made him mad—but I'le go know the Cause—

Help, help, help; Murder—Murder—

Widow, for Heav'ns sake, intercede for us to the Devils—

Oh law, what will my Mother and Sister say, when they hear I am carried away by the Devil—

Who are ye, discover your selves then?

By Charles's Wain, don't you know me?

Why look you, d'ye see, it is I, it is I—

My old Suiters, we are all oblig'd to you, my Masters, you have taken great pains to make your selves Ridi∣culous— Page  43 —ha,—ha,—Pray Sir release 'em for my sake—

You may Command, Madam, let 'em down there—

Thanks good Widow.

Whe faith since we were to lose you, Madam, we thought losers might have leave to speak, and therefore by offering our Service to this Gentleman, we got this oppor∣tunity to speak a little of our minds to you—

And I think we have pretty freely, and at our own Costs too; for I owe Money for some of the Painting—but the Planets are sufficient to pay the Painter—

If ever I court Widow again for your sake, may I be made a Pissing-post of; well, I find Widows are confounded insupportable witty Devils.

We are all oblig'd to you, Sir, for this discovery.

My shame, Madam, urg'd me to contrive some way to discover the Authors of my disgrace—But, Madam, to divert you I have brought a Servant of mine to entertain you with a Dance—

I am indebted to you for this favour, Sir—Please Gentlemen to walk in and partake of a small Collation, and then, my Dear, we will retire to surfeit on Loves sweets—

We follow you, Sir—

Curse on ill luck! What a Devil should be become of this Sister of mine, had she not promised to get the Widow for me, I had not slipt the opportunity which now is irrecovera∣bly lost, she's Married! now the Pox or Impotence be his Curse, for I cannot with patience see my self thus chous't— ha—here comes my brisk Bridegroom—good, I have thought on an excellent way, if possible, to retrieve her— I'le wheadle him to drink, make him damnably drunk, so consequently impotent, and a Widow disappointed, turns De∣vil, will sue a divorce, and then she's mine.—

Oh Sir, most opportunely met—are you alone?—

Yes, Sir,—Your Pleasure—

I am come to—cut your Throat.

How Sir!—cut my Throat, you'l give me a rea∣son, Sir, for it, I hope—

I saw what amorous glances past between my Wife and you at Dinner, and since too I have discovered that which has rais'd such a Storm within me, that nothing but thy death can restore my former calmness—

Jealous by this light—I hope he has not met with my Letter I convey'd to the Widow—

I am all rage with jealousie, your Letter, Sir— see there the reason, Villain, and then judg if I can pardon such an injury—Therefore prepare to yield up either Life, or Love—

Nay, Sir, since you have discovered my passion, then know I do, must, and will love your Widow, nay, dote upon the sight of her, and yet no harm to you, since you possess the wealth, you cannot barr a longing stander by, to wish and sigh, since you know 'tis in vain; therefore I will persist— ah 'tis a charming Creature!

Hell and Furies! shall I stand tamely still, and hear a fellow boldly to my face proclaim my Infamy!

A fellow, Sir▪ Provoke me not, I say provoke me not; if you do, by Heav'n, if possible, I'le cuckol'd thee be∣fore thy face—

This is beyond all patience, base Villain draw—

Pish Sir, your little Bodkin frights not me, see I have one can match it—Yet I believe thee Valiant, or such a little whipper-ginnie durst not have been so desperate to have ventur'd on a longing Widow—

How, Sir, have at thy heart!—

Good Child, thou art too forward,—reserve thy vigour for another place, it will be little enough, I'le engage— for young, Sir, there can be no comparison between you and I, in love affairs—

How mean you Sir?

You may perhaps be well enough for the Theory, to cringe, and whine, and wheadle your self into a Virgins heart; but a Widows wise discerning Eye must of necessity read here the only man that's fittest for the Practick part—

Heav'ns! Do but hereafter look upon her with one pleasing glance, and I'le damn thy Soul.

A Bully in Swadling-clouts by this light, 'tis the youngest Hector I ever met with in my life—a gad, little Squire, were she the great Turk's favourite, I'de look and gaze altho I knew my death should follow, and let me tell thee, had somebody been true to their promise, your fortune had been mine—therefore, little one, you may thank my cross Stars for your good success. A Pox on an absent Sister—

How Sir, oblig'd to you? Oh insupportable! thou base detracter of my honour, who not only would supplant my love, but blast my reputation, and make me undeserving of a Ladies favour.

If you come to that point, Sir, what can you boast of, should be so attractive? I must confess thou appearest a hopeful Stripling, and I question not you have the pretty im∣pertinents of one of your Age, as Dancing, Singing, affected Gestures, be peirtly witty, making bold with every new Play comes out, and extravagantly tawdrey in every new fashion.

Death and the Devil!

These accomplishments, I must confess, may be very surprizing to a poor young thing of a Boarding-School, who never had love made to her but by her Dancing-Master, or some such follow.

This is beyond all sufferance—

This won't do—and now, little one, I le dis∣charge my Conscience, between you and I, I do verily be∣lieve, the Widow that was, and your Wife that is, Married you only for a Drudg or Steward of her Estate, while she spends it on pleasures, with such vigorous Blades as my self, and who knows it may be my turn; which if it be, faith Page  46 I'le be very reasonable, and Cuckold thee as seldom as possi∣bly I can—

I'le hear no more; but thus will make a passage to thy Soul, for I swear thy Ruine, Death, Damnation—

Say you so, then 'tis time to look about—and since you provide me, little one, know this, that if I kill thee, I swear to marry the Widow the next day—

Thus I prevent thy boasting— dull, dull, Brother, not know your own flesh and blood.

My Sister▪ I'm all amazement▪

Now Sir, what think you of my design?

Design quotha! 'twas well you discovered your self, or I had spoil'd all;—but I'm a Dog if I understand what you mean?—you are Married—

I am to the Widow, I knew not how to cheat the Parson; but I question not, but to deceive the Widow e're I sleep—

As how, as how?—I long to hear—

See, my Husband comes with some intelligence—.

Is that my Brother Hadland?—

Sir, My Lady is retir'd to her Chamber—

Leave off your distance now, sweet heart; for I have told my Brother all.

Kind-Brother I obliging Sister!—

But Brother, do you like my Widow in earnest?

Like her! Heavn's! I love her infinitely! were she not Mistress of a farthing, agad, I believe I should have Married her, there's such an aiery sweetness in her face—

Say you so, then along with me, I have one design more, and if that take, we are once more happy—

Lead on whil'st I follow, and admire thy wit.