A new family-book, or, The true interest of families being directions to parents and children, and to those who are instead of parents : shewing them their several duties, and how they may be happy in one another : together with several prayers for families and children, and graces before and after meat : to which is annexed a discourse about the right way of improving our time / by James Kirkwood ... ; with a preface, by Dr. Horneck.

Concerning the Duties of Step-Fathers and Step-Mothers.

The first and chief thing which belongs to the care of Step-Parents,* 1.1 is, to do all that they can for the benefit of their Childrens Souls. They ought to endeavour to season their tender minds with the Fear and Love of God, to reform what is amiss in their temper and humour by all kind and prudent Methods, to teach them to worship God, to Remember their Creator in the days of their Youth: They ought to see that they be taught to read; that they spend the Lord's Day well, and that they frequent the place of Publick Worship: They ought to make them understand what was promised in their Name at their Bap∣tism, and to encourage them to renew their Baptismal Covenant, if they have an opportunity: They ought to advise them to come to the Lord's Table so soon as they are fit for it, and then, as also at other times, to examine themselves, and to call themselves to

a strict and serious account, They ought to observe what remarkable Mercies and Providences they meet with, and to acquaint them therewith so soon as they are capable to reflect on such things: They ought likewise, to talk to them often of the various Providences which either they have met with themselves, or which they have observed in the World, that thereby the Childrens minds may be affected with a due sense of the Power, the Greatness, the Wisdom, the Mer∣cy, and the Justice of God.

To render all which endeavours ef∣fectual, they must be Examples of Piety to them: They must see what Com∣pany they use, and do what they can to keep them out of ill Company, and to acquaint them with those who have a sense of good things: They must reprove them when it is needful, but with great mildness and discretion: And as for correcting and chastening of them, they ought to leave that part to the Natural Parent, if alive; but if the Natural Parent be dead, then they may correct them when it is necessary, according to their Age: But in this great caution ought to be used, they

must do it with the greatest gentleness and tenderness that is possible, not on∣ly out of Conscience, but Prudence, to prevent all occasion, which a great ma∣ny are apt to take, to reflect upon them, and to censure them severely and unjustly, when they do any thing that looks like unkindness or sharpness to their Step-Children. 'Tis therefore very adviseable, when Correction is necessary, to acquaint some of the Childrens Relations (if they be not at too great a distance) with their fault, and so to correct them by their advice, and, if possible, in their pre∣sence, that they may be, as it were, Witnesses of their doing nothing but what is absolutely fit and needful to be done for the advantage of the Chil∣dren.

Step-Parents ought also to take the opportunity of their Childrens sickness, or of any other Adversity they meet with, to set home upon their minds such Admonitions and Counsels as they were not so apt to mind when they were in health. And to all their other Endeavours, they ought to joyn their daily prayers to God for them, that he would bless them, and make

them his faithful and obedient Children and Servants.

As Step-Parents ought principally to take care of the Souls of their Step-Children, so they must not neglect their Bodies. Their Duty as to this, is, in a word, to take care that they have necessary and convenient Food and Rayment.

As to the outward Estate of Step-Children, tho' Parents are not obliged to give them any great Portion of their Worldly Goods, especially if they have, or are like to have Children of their own, to give such things to; yet they ought to be careful, that the Portions, which of right belong to their Step-Children, be preserved and improved for their use and advantage, according to the Will of the Deceased Parent.

When they are fit for a Trade or any honest way of getting their Lively∣hood, they ought to assist them all they can, that they may be placed forth as happily and comfortably as may be. In like manner when they are fit for Marriage, they ought to express a great deal of readiness and chearful∣ness to serve them to the utmost of

their Power; they ought to assist them with their best advice and hearty Coun∣sel in a matter of so great Importance. And, in a word, they ought not to be wanting to them in any thing that may be useful and beneficial to them, either as to their Souls, or Bodies, or as to their outward Concerns.

Notes

• * 1.1

  Concerning the Duties of Step-Fathers and Step-Mothers, or Fathers and Mothers in Law: