Presvyteros diplēs timēs axios, or, The true dignity of St. Paul's elder exemplified in the life of ... Mr. Owen Stockton ... with a collection of his observations, experiences and evidences recorded by his own hand : to which is added his funeral sermon / by John Fairfax ...

THE RELATION.

MR. Owen Stockton was born in the City of Chichester, in the County of Sussex, the last week of May, 1630. was the fourth Son of his Father Mr. Owen Stockton, a worthy Pre∣bendary of that Cathedral, who was a younger brother of that ancient family of the Stocktons, of Kiddington Green in Cheshire. About the seventh year of his age, his Father dyed and left the care of him, and his other Children, to their Mother, a pious Gentlewoman of the family of the Tilees, in Cambridgeshire. She being a Widdow and stranger in Chichester; soon after the death of her Husband, returned to her native Country, and setled her self at Ely, where was a very good Grammar School, under the Government of Mr. William Hitches, to whose care she committed this her Son, for his education.

From a Child he was of great hopes, while yet a little Grammar Schollar, his inclination was such as presaged more than ordinary im∣provement.

Looking once accidentally into Mr. Fox his Acts, and Monuments Ecclesiasti∣cal, in one of the parish Churches of that Town, and reading some little part thereof, he was so affected, with the knowledge of that History, that he never ceased to supplicate his friends, till he had obtained one part of them, for his use. Wherein (declining the puerile recreations, to which his School-fellows addicted themselves) for some years he spent, most of that time which he had vacant, and could redeem from his obliged attendance upon the School.

His judicious Master discerning in him a ready natural capacity, for learning and desire after it, with industrious diligence▪ in study, (for though he spent, so great a part of his time out of School, in reading History, yet withal he so performed his part and offices, in the School, as he never gave occasion of correction or rebuke) and observing more∣over his Constant daily attendance on the worship of God, according to the rules of the Schools. He earnestly Commended him to his Mother, and persuaded her to think of no other course or trade of life for him, but that he be prepared and sent to the University; in order to the Office, and Work of the Ministry.

Accordingly not without his own inclination and choice being sufficiently instructed, with Grammar Learning for Academical studies,

he was in the sixteenth year of his age, viz. Jan. 2. 1645. admitted into Christs Colledge in Cambridge, under the Tuition of the Learn∣ed, Dr. Henry Moore. His years were not many, but his stature less, Insomuch that for some time he could not pass the streets without special notice taken of him, and expressed on that account.

Nor was this only a vulgar observation, but such also as fell under the Remark, of the late King Charles the first, who being brought to a Gentlemans house, by the Army night to Cambridge, and many Schollars coming thither in their habits, to see his Ma∣jesty, was pleased to order that they should be admitted to his Royall presence, and kiss his hand. Among whom this Coming in his or∣der, His Majesty made special observation of of him, and gave him his gracious benediction, saying, Here's a little Schollar indeed, God bless him.

His residence in the Colledge, was so con∣stant, that during the whole time of his Under∣graduacy, he was not absent Communibus annis Conjunctim & divisim, one month in a year. And his sobriety such that he ab∣stained not only from publick Houses, but in other Company, and places from Wines, and and strong Drink, as judging Nature in his age, to stand in no need of such kind of helps.

After he had taken his degree of Batchelor,

of Arts he resided still in the Colledge, ap∣plying himself seriously to the Study of Divi∣nity, which he alwayes designed.

In pursuance whereof, whether by his own or others advice, I cannot say, he went to London, and spent some months there ac∣quainting, himself with the principal Book∣sellers, from whom he took an account, of the best writers in Divinity, of that time, frequenting the Library of Sion Colledge, and the Lectures at Gresham Colledge, applying himself to several Worthy Ministers of the City, and attending on their exercises which were daily, that he might observe the variety, of mens Gifts and their several methods of Preaching. By which he made so great an Im∣provement of himself, that he hath often said since, that if it should please God to give him a Son of his own disposed to the Ministery, He should give it him as his particular advice, before he entred upon the work of preaching, to spend some months in London, in attending on those learned Divines, which excelled in the Gift of preaching, wherewith that City is alwayes furnished.

Being much affected and pleased with this study, Resolving to pursue it earnestly, and prepare himself for the Work of the Ministry, He did privately, yet in a very solemn manner by fasting and prayer, make as it were a de∣dication, of himself to God for that service.

When he was middle Batchelor, he was

removed from Christs Colledge, and made Iunior Fellow, of Gonvile and Caius Colledge, about the beginning of the year, 1651. where after a years continuance, and probation of of his worth, he was translated from that to a, Senior Fellowship, which he enjoyed during the space of six years and upward. In which time he discharged the office of Steward to the Temporal, of Catechist and Conduct, to the Spiritual advantage of that Society.

Here it was that the Lord Trained up this his Disciple to be a Scribe instructed for the Kingdom of God, furnishing him so plentifully with Divine, and Spiritual knowledg (which he gained as well by experience, and observa∣tion of Gods dealing with him, and the ope∣ration of his Spirit upon his heart, as by in∣dustrious Study, and Meditation) that he could readily bring forth out of his Treasure things new and old: Was able to speak perti∣nently, sutably, and seasonably to the various Capacities, Conditions, and Cases of Saints, and Sinners, and became an happy, powerful Instrument in the hand of God for the Con∣version, Edification, Consolation, and Sal∣vation of many Souls.

His design and desire being to serve the Lord Jesus Christ in the Office and work of the Ministry, he directed the course of his Studies with special respect to that Service. And though his place and exercises in the Uni∣versity obliged him to the Study of Philosophy,

wherein he was equal to most; yet the Study of Divinity was his 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉. Not satisfying him∣self with the reading of the elaborate Writings of the most learned Divines, wherewith he furnished his Library at the Expence of some hundreds of pounds, he especially addicted himself to the reading, and study of the Holy Scriptures, as containing the whole Counsel of God which, as his Minister, he was to declare to men. Which course of his study God so succeeded with his Blessing, that it may be truly said of him what St. Luke saith of Apol∣los, Act. 18. 24. He was mighty in the Scrip∣tures, his Head, Memory, Heart, and Tongue, were full of the Scriptures, whereof he hath given abundant Evidence by his Scriptural Catechism. In the opening, and applying whereof his Gift was excellent and peculiar. All that knew him and were acquainted with his Discourse, Ministry, or Pen, must bear him that Testimony, with the holy Apostle St. Paul he preferred the Learning gotten at the feet of Christ, above all he had got at the feet of Gamaliel, and though he had the va∣luable accomplishments of other learning, yet he determined not to know any thing save Jesus Christ and him crucified. In which knowledge he was like Saul higher than most of his Bre∣thren from the shoulders and upwards. I know none I can better compare him with, than that Eminent, and Powerful servant and Instru∣ment of Jesus Christ, Mr. Arthur Hildershaw

whom I am prone to believe he propounded to himself as a Pattern for imitation.

But knowledge alone is not sufficient instru∣ction for a Minister of the Gospel. It is no rare thing to find some great Schollars in the Theory of Scripture, who yet are but very ordinary Christians, whose light like that of the Moon hath very cold influences. He is best accomplished whose knowing head effects his heart, and governs his life; who knows re∣vealed truth as well by Spiritual sense and Ex∣perience, as by Speculation. The Spirit of God is a Spirit of truth and of life too, Com∣municateth both grace and Gifts, and teacheth as well 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉 as 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉. Both which consisted together in this excellent person. The word of God dwelt both in his Head and Heart and was effectually the Law of his Life. He was a Burning as well as Shinning Light: A man more than ordinarily mortified to the pleasures of the Flesh and vanities of the World; freely and resolvedly devoted to the fear of God. His Conversation was in Heaven, his Communion with God, his Delight in the Saints, his Business Religion, his Zeal for Holiness, his main De∣sign the glorifying of God, and the Salvation of his own and others Souls. Whereof the following Pages will, I doubt not, be an abun∣dant Evidence not only to the Charitable, but Rational judgment of the Christian Reader.

As for his practice of Mortification, I shall not otherwise express it than in his own words,

as I read it in the records of the remarkable passages of his life by his own hand, but af∣ter he had a family, viz.

Having been foiled by the lusts of my own Heart several times, and considering what I should do to get rid of those lusts, which, had so often prevailed over me, God directed me to three several means. The one was sug∣gested to me as I was walking in my garden and meditating on the affairs of my Soul, and that was to be more frequent in Eyeing, applying, and meditating on the promises; and the Scripture, which the Holy Spirit of God set before me for this end was 2 Pet. 1. 4. By the precious promises given to us, we escape the pollution that is in the world, through lust. The other was suggested to me as I was hear∣ing a Sermon, and that was to be daily ap∣plying the Lord Jesus to my soul, grounded on Rom. 13. 13. 14. where the Apostle adviseth to put on the Lord Jesus Christ, as an help against chambering and wantonness, strife and envying. The third was suggested to me as I was riding abroad, and discoursing of the things of God, which was Gal. 5. 16. Walk in the Spirit and ye shall not fulfill the lusts of the flesh.

In pursuance of these means for the morti∣fying of the lusts of the flesh, I determined with my self, to Eye the promises of God, more frequently then I had done, and to that end, I chose out some promises of daily and conti∣nual

use, and determined by the help of God, to salute and embrace them once a day, and not only to take a view of them my self, but in my meditations, and soliloquies to spread them before God, and to put the Lord in re∣membrance of them. For supplying all the wants of the day, I chose that promise Phil. 4. 19. for growth in grace, Hos. 14. 5. for subduing my sins. Mic. 7. 19. Rom. 6. 14. for success in my undertakings, Ps. 1. 3. for turning all the events of the day for good to me. Rom. 8. 28. for the conversion and sanctification of my children. Isa. 44. 3. for my yoke-fellow and servants, and all others in my family that they might get good from me, and return to God, and grow in grace, Hos. 14. 7. for sanctifying of my afflictions, Isa. 27. 9. Zech. 13. 9. for audience of my prayers, Mic. 7. 7. Joh. 14. 13. 14. for grace and strength to manage all the works of the day, to the glory of God. Zech. 10. 12. for protection from dangers and casualties. Gen. 15. 1. for giving me eternal life, in case the day should bring death to me. Luk. 12. 32. Joh. 3. 16. for counsel and direction in all cases of difficulty, and unexpected emergencies. Isa. 58. 11. Ps. 32. 8.

I judged it also very conducible, to the Glory of God and my own soul's good, to manage all my employments, as much as may be with an eye to the promises, and as to my calling, when I am studying to com∣pose

Sermons, Deut. 28. 8. when I go to preach, Math. 28. 19. 20. for success in my preaching, Isa, 56. 8.—65. 23.

I was the more confirmed in this frequent, and familiar converse with the promises, not only as it helps on our participation of the Divine nature, and our escaping the pollu∣tion that is in the world through lust, but because the Lord commands us to be alwaies mindful of his covenant, 1 Chron. 16. 15. and it pleaseth God to see us taking hold of his Covenant. Isa. 56. 4. and it is for the Glory of God, 2 Cor. 1. 20.

I determined also when I should feel the workings of any lust, presently to look up to Jesus Christ. It being the remedy which the Holy Ghost, prescribes against such sins as do most easily beset us. Heb. 12. 1. 2. I have often been encouraged and helped in this practice, of looking unto Jesus, to subdue my sins from Act. 3. ult. God sent his Son Jesus, to bless us in turning us every one from his iniquities. Beza's note upon that text is very good, and hath been of use to me, viz. that the great word for inquities, signifies the roots and habits of Sin. I saw it was my duty, and concernment every day, to be more frequent in applying my soul to Christ, and Christ his benefits to my soul.

In pursuance of the, 3d means of morti∣fication, viz. walking in the spirit, I re∣solved to endeavour to do my works, and du∣ties

both to God and men, more spiritually, and in order hereunto, to reduce my actings to some word, and as oft as I could, to eye some word of God, as I was entring on them; as for instance, If I be called out by others or stirred up in my own Spirit to visit the sick, or any afflicted person, to have my thoughts on Math. 25. 36. or Jam. 1. 27. when any poor people come to me for relief, or any object of charity is presented to me to eye. Gal. 6. 10. or Hebr. 13. 16. or Isa. 58. 10. or Eccl. 11. 1. or prov. 19. 17. when a poor man cometh to borrow, Deut. 15. 7. 8. 10. When to write letters, take a journey, or be any ways employed for others, Gal. 5. 13. Phil. 2. 4. when to visit out of courtesy, or do any thing which courtesy requireth, 1 Pet. 3. 8. when to instruct my Servants and Children, Deut. 6. 7. Gen. 18. 19. when to Catechise the youth that come to my family, Joh. 21. 15. Prov. 22. 6. when invited to exercise abroad among poor or rich, Isa. 32. ult. when to administer a reproof, Lev. 19. 17. when to confer about Spiritual things, Mal. 3. 17.

This was the wise and holy method, which this faithful Servant and Souldier of▪ Jesus Christ, prescribed to himself by Divine di∣rection, whereby to manage the Spiritual War, with the sin that dwelt in him, that he might not be overcome with it. According to which he moreover charged himself with,

the practice of universal positive Holiness, which he thus records.

Being under the rebukes of Gods chastising providence, I set apart a day to humble my Soul with fasting and prayer, that I might obtain from God, a Sanctified use of my afflictions. I sought God to pardon my sins, which were the causes thereof, and to make them work for my good. I spent a good part of the day in meditating, how I should make a right improvement of these correcti∣ons.

I Considered that one main end of all Chastisements was, that God might make us partakers of his holiness, Heb. 12, 10. Isa. 26. 9. I resolved in the strength, and by the help of God to follow after holiness more vigorously than I had done, and I engaged in this resolution because I saw from, Isa. 60. 21. that by my being holy, and righte∣ous God should be glorified.

And seeing the nature of holiness lieth in our bearing Gods image, in our being like to God, or in our conformity to the Divine Nature, Eph. 4. 24. Col. 3. 10. I resolved to endeavour to imitate, and resemble God in mercifulness, Luk. 6. 36. in forgiving injuries, Eph. 4. ult. in doing good, Ps. 119. 68. in justice, Deut. 32. 4. in Love, Joh. 4. 16. in humility, Ps. 113. 5, 6. in longfuffering, Exod. 34. 6. in not retaining anger, Ps. 30. 5. in uprightness, Isa. 26. 7. in kindness, Luk.

6. 35. in helping the fatherless, widdow and stranger, Ps. 10. 14.—146. 9. And whereas we come to partake of Gods image. 1. by beholding the discovery which he hath made of himself, and his glorious Attributes in the gospel, 2 Cor. 3. 18. 2 by applying the promises, 2 Pet. 1. 4. 3. by walking with him, Act. 4. 13. for we grow like those with whom we converse, Prov. 22. 24. 25. I determined to walk with God, to cleave to the promises, and to meditate often on his glori∣ous Attributes.

And seeing that our holiness lieth in the Con∣formity of our life, to the will of God revealed in his word, as well as in the resemblance of the Divine Nature, I determined to set be∣fore me several Scriptures as my rule to walk by, and often to ponder them, and if I cannot walk up to these rules, yet my en∣deavours shall be (grace assisting) to walk after them, and that will be accepted as a demonstration of my Love to God, 2 Joh. v. 6.

For guiding and regulating my thoughts, I set these Scriptures before me, Jer. 14. 14. Isa. 55. 7. Mal. 3. 17. Ps. 104. 34. Phil. 4. 8. Prov. 23. 26. Deut. 15. 9. Eccl. 10. 20. Prov. 24. 9. Math. 9. 4. Zech. 8. 17.

For regulating my affections, these, Col. 3. 2, 5. Gal. 5. 24. particularly, for my delight. Ps. 1. 2.—37. 5. my joy, Phil. 4. 4. Ps. 43. 4. my desire, Isa. 26. 8, 9. my

sorrow, Ezek. 7. 16. my Love, Math. 22. 37. Ps. 119. 97. my hatred, Ps 97. 10. my fears, Luk. 12. 4, 5. my hope, Ps. 39. 7. my trust, Ps. 62. 8. Isa. 26. 4.

For regulating my speech, these Eph. 4. 29. Col. 4. 6. Deut. 6. 6, 7. Ps. 119. 46. Ps. 71. 8. 24. Prov. 31. 26. We should lay it as a law upon our selves, to speak kindly to all sorts of persons.

For my works, these Tit. 3. 8. 1. 2 Tim. 2. 12. 1 Tim. 5. 10. Tit. 2. 14. Math. 5. 47. 1 Tim. 6. 18. Rev. 3. 2. Rom. 13. 12. Act. 26. 20. Our works must be Visibly, as well as truly good, Math. 5. 16. must be exem∣plary, Tit. 2. 7. yet we must not expect Justification or Salvation by our own works, but by grace, Eph. 2. 8, 9. Rom. 3. 28.

Thus did this man of God gird himself with the Sword of the Spirit, which he faithfully and successfully managed against his corrup∣tions, temptations and transgressions. Thus did he put on the brest-plate of Righteousness, holding the mystery of Faith in a pure Consci∣ence, applying the word of God, as an in∣violable Law and rule to his heart, and life Sincerely aiming at the Glory of God, and the, obtaining that Blessedness, which by the Covenant of God is secured to the undefiled in the way, who walk in the Law of the Lord. How fit was he to be the mouth of God, and Ambassador of Christ to sinners, who, when with greatest importunity he called them to

Repentance and Reformation of heart and life, and the Mortification of the most beloved lusts; and most earnestly pressed upon them Faith, and Holiness, and universal Conformity to the will of God, was not reproached by his own heart, as if he laid heavy burdens upon others, which himself would not touch with one of his fingers: But with deliberate choice and constant resolution imposed them upon himself, and obviated all objections, by demonstrating the strictest holiness to be practicable, eligible, and delectable by his own example.

But though he was very liberally instructed by Nature, Art, and Grace for the Office and work of the Ministry, yet such low and mean thoughts had he of himself, both of his Gifts and Grace: And such deep and affecting appre∣hensions of the difficulty, and weight of the Ministerial Service, which as it is in it self, so was to him, Onus tremendum, and 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉; Who is sufficient? saith the Apostle, that though it was his design and desire to serve God, and his Church in that great work, yet he was so discouraged, that he would not as too many do, hastily adventure and engage himself in that Office by solemn Ordination, but would first prove himself well, ask Counsel of God and his Word, and attend to the Call of God by his Spirit and Providence.

Accordingly being Master of Arts, he did sometimes exercise his Gifts in some Countrey Villages nigh the University. Where his man∣ner

was at first privately to enquire out what small Parishes within ten or fifteen Miles of Cambridge were destitute of Ministers. Unto these he went and Preached, and that with such privacy, as for some while none knew of it but himself, and the Parishioners to whom he went; and to many of them it was a long time unknown, either who he was, or from whence he came.

This Service he perform'd Gratis, neither expecting nor according any worldly Reward, yea, it was a Charge to him. Among these Countrey-people God blessed him, and gave him the First-fruits of his Ministry, making him instrumental and successful to the Con∣version, and Edification of many. Whereby he was so endeared to them, and they to him, that after he was called to Preach at one certain place in Cambridge, he would yet often go amongst them on the Week-days, Preaching sometimes at one place, and sometimes at ano∣ther, the people laying aside their Country-business, and readily Travelling several Miles to attend upon his Ministry. And after his remove from Cambridge to a considerable di∣stance in Essex and Suffolk, his manner was for the most part so long as he lived, once a year to visit those people, Preaching to them, and Conversing with them.

After he had a while thus exercised his Gifts among the Country Villages. He observed three things especially, which did much en∣courage

him to give himself up to the Ministry of the Word.

1. The benefiting of his own Soul in his Meditations for Preaching; for whilst he was studying for others, the Lord made it a word of Instruction to himself: And he found it the best means of growth to be watering others. Yet herein he perceived (he said) great need of Watchfulness, and much care lest his heart should put away that Word from himself which he was pressing upon others.

2. He found his heart much diverted from other studies. Philosophy seemed tedious to him, he found not that satisfaction in studying meer human Authors as in meditating on Di∣vine things. Yea he thought he disrelished all other Studies, and they were unsavory to him, and he knew not but that this might be of the Lord, thus to turn his heart from the one, and encline it to the other Study.

3. The Lord had been pleased to bless his labours in some measure, and ordered so by his Providence that it came to his knowledge. As particularly at Burwell, at Swafham, at Soham, at Land-Beech, at Chesterton in Cambridgshire, at Debenham in Suffolk, at Wethersfield in Essex, This was an especial encouragement to him, as it might well be, to pursue the Ministry

In the year 1654 he was chosen Catechist for that year in the Colledge. In which choice he observed the special Providence of God, for whereas formerly the Masters used to nominate

the fellows for such Offices as they should bear, he this year bad the fellows agree, and choose among themselves which they did according to Seniority. His business detained him from being present at the meeting of the fellows, and every one having chosen what they liked best, they cast the Catechists place upon him, judging him fittest for it, which he accepted, and accordingly began to discharge it in Mi∣chaelmass Term. This was the first place where he setled himself to a constant course of Preaching. Wherein God did greatly encou∣rage and honour him; for the very first night he Exercised, one of the Fellows came to him, and told him he had felt the power of God in that Ordinance upon his heart.

The Statutes of the Colledge obliging him to these Divinity Exercises as Catechist in the Chapel only in Term time, towards the end of the Term he began to consider whether he should continue, and proceed in the same Exercises as well out of Term, as in Term, his Conscience towards God as well as the local Statute, and his zeal to improve all opportunities to do good prompting him thereto; being doubtful what to do, he was determined to the Affirmative, by hearing a Sermon Preached at St. Maries by the Reverend and Learned Dr. Tuckury then Professor of Divinity there, the scope whereof was to shew what a Blessed and desireable thing it was to have the Church of God multiplied and encreased, and in the Application he did

in an especial manner direct his words to the University, and did in the name of God ear∣nestly beseech every one in their places, to endeavour the encrease and multiplying of the Church of God, both by adding themselves to it, and labouring to add others to it. His Soul was much warmed at this Sermon, and considering the seasonableness of it, he looked upon this word as directed specially to himself, and took encouragement from it to proceed in his Work.

This practice of his being a proof not only of his abilities, but of his willingness also, and that laboriously to serve God in the work of the Ministry; About Easter following, a motion was made to him by one of St. Andrews Parish in Cambridge in the Name of the rest, to supply that place, which he declined, promising only to give them one Sermon. Afterward the motion being more importunately renewed to him, he advised them to seek God to direct them in a business of that concern, commend∣ing to them others of greater Abilities and Grace than himself to make choice of; telling them he would at that time, neither deny nor pro∣mise any thing. About six weeks after, 8 or 9 of the Parish came to him in the name of the whole, and signified to him that it was their joynt Request, that he would Preach with them on the Lords days in the Forenoon.

Whereupon after a Fortnights consideration, and seeking of God, and Consulting friends,

he complied with their desire, and undertook that Service.

Here God so blessed his Ministry both to the Students in the University, and people of the Town, that his Encouragement was ve∣ry great, for which he always blessed God. In the Colledge he so well discharged his Office, that the year now expiring he was again chosen into the same Office next year. And now be∣ing satisfied that God did call him to this Work and Office, by the success which God gave to his labours, and the acceptance he had in the Church, he resolved thoroughly to devote, and give up himself to it by solemn Ordination. For which end he repaired to London, and be∣ing there proved, and well approved of, was Feb. 13. 1655, solemnly set apart to this Office, and Work, by Fasting, and Prayer, and laying on of the Hands of the Presbytery. To which God seemed to set his Seal both du∣ring the Action, by very gracious influences of his Spirit upon his heart beyond his preparations, for which he hath Recorded thanks to God, and on the Lords day following, viz. Feb. 17. When being desired to Preach at the Charter∣house both parts of the day: In the Afternoon one put up a Bill to him, wherein the person that put it up acknowledged, that he had long lain under the guilt of a known Sin, and was convinced of it by the morning Sermon, and desired Prayers to God for help against it. Others also in that Congregation he observed

to be affected at that his first Sermon after his Ordination.

In his returning from London to Cambridge, upon the way he experienced a very good Pro∣vidence with which his heart was much affected, and which he thankfully Recorded as an instance of Gods special care of him. The night over∣taking him ere he could reach to Hasting Mills, where the Waters were very high by reason of a flood, just as he came almost to the Water, a man met him, who knowing the danger of the Water, and the safest passage through it, offered him his Service, and very kindly lent him his own taller and stronger Horse, and riding back again on his Horse before him led him safely through, which else he perceived he could not have passed without the hazard of his Life.

Being now return'd to Cambridge, to the Charge he had undertaken, with what Con∣science, Faithfulness, Zeal, and Industry, he applied himself to the Work to which he had devoted himself, and was now solemnly set apart, I leave to the Pious Reader to judge by what follows in his own words.

July 7th. 1656. I set apart that day for Fasting and Prayer to seek the Lord for Coun∣sel, whether I should Preach in the Afternoon at St. Andrews. I had some thoughts of it, and motions thereto some time since. But now my time for Chapel exercise being expired, I took▪ it into serious thoughts, and having

humbled my Soul for my sins, and begged of God that he would settle my mind in this thing, and teach me what was his mind therein, after pains and searching the Scripture I came to this resolution, I was fully persuaded that it was the mind of the Lord that I should also Preach in the Afternoons, and that from these Scriptures.

2 Tim. 4. 1. 2. I charge the before God,—be instant in Season, and out of Season. As we will answer it to Jesus Christ, at the day of Judgment, we are to take all oppor∣tunities to preach his Word. I consider here is a fair opportunity put into my hands, and therefore I am bound in Conscience not to neglect it, 1 Pet. 5. 2. 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉, as much as in you lieth, feed thy flock, So Calvin renders the word.

1 Cor. 9. 16. 17. Necessity is laid upon me, yea woe is unto me, if I preach not the gospel. Though I preach the gospel I have nothing to glory of, If I do this willingly I have a reward.

Eccl. 11 6. in the morning sow thy seed, and in the evening withhold not thy hand: For thou knowest not what shall prosper this or that, this seems a clear resolution of the question.

1 Cor. 15. 58.—always abounding in the work of the Lord.

Gal. 6. 10. As we have opportunity let us do good, here is a fair opportunity, and how it may be taken from me, or I from it

I know not, and therefore hold it my duty to lay hold on it.

Hereupon I resolved to preach once a fortnight, in the Afternoons also; and con∣sidering my weakness for such a work, I was encouraged from Isa. 41. 10. and Math. 28. ult. Go teach and lo I am with you, with you to help and assist you; with you to bless your labours, and make your work prospe∣rous under your hands.

Jul. 13. 1656. I began my Afternoons Exercise, and entred upon the Doctrine of Repentance. I have found God very much with me, assisting and enlarging me, and blessing my labours to some of my hearers. I bless his Name for putting it into my heart.

Nov: 16 I had not so much of the en∣livening presence of God in the afternoon as I was wont to have: Yet God blessed his word. One of the Parish told Mr. J. He thought their Minister knew their hearts, and added he was resolved to amend.

Apr. 21. 1657. I set apart this day to seek God by fasting, and prayer, to shew me my way, and to direct me in a business that had been upon my Spirit nigh half a year, which was to preach once a fortnight, on the week day, at the church where I am placed. I engaged the prayers of others also for me in this particular. And when I went to the Sacrament, I laid the promise before God, that he would guide me continually, and

teach me in the way that I should choose, as that which I desire might among others be Sealed up to me.

Whilst I was thus deliberating with my self what to do, I met with this providence: Being at Soham to preach the Lecture there, I slept that night very disturbedly, towards the morning me thought I saw the Lord Jesus Christ in his glory, who spake comfor∣tably to me, and encouraged me in my work, but spake very sad words to another, Mr. of Arts that was with me, (whom I dreamed to be a godly man, yet one who was noted for his unwillingness to preach in Town) When I awoke I considered with my self, what this should mean. I considered it was but a dream, and so not much to be heeded, and again I considered that sometimes God speaks to us in dreams, and slumbering upon our beds, Job. 33. 13. 14. 15. whence I gathered it might be something of encou∣ragement to me. In the morning when I was up, It fell out in my ordinary course of reading, the Scripture, to read, Act. 18. and when I had read, ver. 9. 10., and pondered what had befell me in the night, I could not but wonder at the Providence of God, to cause this Scripture, to fall in with my former dream, which made me ponder the more upon it. I saw God did sometimes speak to his people in a vision. I saw the same reason why Paul should Preach, viz. because there was much people

belonging to the Lord there, might be for∣cible to prevail with me, for he enclines a great multitude of people to attend upon me. When I had considered of it, I resolved to lay this up in my heart, and not to slight it, though I could not build on it any ground of my undertaking my work.

Consulting the Scriptures these came into my mind Act. 6. 4. we will give our selves continually to Prayer, and to the Ministry of the word, where I saw that such as were called of God to preach the word, ought to make it their business, and give up themselves to it. Rom. 1. 1. 14. 15. here I saw that one sepa∣rated to the Gospel of Christ, was a debter, bound, and should be ready as much as in him lieth, Isa. 40. 9. O thou that bringest good tidings to Zion, get the up into the high mountains, lift up thy voice with strength, lift it up, be not afraid. Reading this Scrip∣ture in my ordinary course, I found it set home with life, and power in reference to my present doubt, Get the up, lift up thy voice, It removed the great obstacle of fear; What would men say and think of my forward∣ness? Be not afraid; I was the more confirm∣ed by considering this Scripture, is mainly directed to such as God hath sent to preach the gospel, by comparing this Scripture with, Isa. 52. 7. and Rom. 10. 15.

And the Scripture did the more affect me be∣cause it was in this manner set home after pray∣er,

when I had been seeking God in reference to this doubt. Act. 18. 5. Paul was pressed in Spirit and testified, hence I saw the Minis∣ters of God, may take encouragement, to preach the word from inward pressures of Spirit.

Having these inducements to preach on the week day, I set apart as before the 21th of April, to seek God by fasting and prayer, to direct me what to do. Having put up my request to him, in the name of Jesus Christ, I shall consider what motives I have to it, and what dissuasives from it, and judge of both according to the Scriptures, and do therein as the Lord shall direct me, by his word and Spirit.

'The Arguments moving to it are these,

1. I Find God much enlarging my Me∣ditations, so as I am a long while ere I can dispatch the Subject I enter upon, whereby I foresee I shall go over but few heads in Divinity, while I stay unless I preach oftener. And I know not what the meaning of God herein should be, that he watereth me so much, but that I should water others.

2. I have found God owning me when I closed with the like motions, at other times, particularly in the Afternoon Exercise, I have found God wonderfully gra∣cious beyond expression, and I heartily bless God that put it into my heart to undertake

that work, and seeing when I followed God formerly he was with me, why should I not be obedient to his call in this also.

3. It is the work I have been set apart to, and solemnly given up my self to, in the face of the Congregation at Black-Friers, and therefore now there is a necessity lying upon me to preach the Gospel, yea a woe if I preach not, 1 Cor. 9. 16.

4. God hath made my service here accep∣ted of the Saints, and therefore it is likely my Ministry may be more effectual, It may be else∣where my Ministry may be as much despised, as here tis embraced, and therefore it is good to take the present season, and to strike where, and when the Iron is hot.

5. The time is short that I have to live, how soon God many take me hence, I know not. And there being no working in the grave, I am commanded to do what my hand findeth to do, with my might, Eccl. 9. 10. the night cometh when no man can work, and therefore as Christ said, Joh. 9. 4. I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day; So must I do, learn this wisdom of him, to do my work as fast as I can, seeing I know not how short my day may be.

6. The times are evil, and I know not how soon we may be cut short of these oppor∣tunities; and it's an express Command that we should be wise and redeem time, Eph. 5. 15. 16. And God commands as we have oppor∣tunity,

to do good to all, Gal. 6. 10. preach∣ing of the Gospel is doing good, and here is an opportunity, I must not let it slip.

7. If I should preach once a fortnight on the week-day it will but be equivalent to preaching twice every Lords day, (Seeing now I preach but once every other Sabbath) which must be my work, when I come into the Country, and yet my work here is far lighter than it will be there, for here I am free from worldly cares, family distractions, and a pastoral charge.

8. One Soul is more worth than the whole world, and the preaching of the Gos∣pel is the power of God to Salvation, there∣fore we should not think any pains too great to preach the word, seeing we may through God be a mean to convert and save souls thereby.

9. Christ chargeth Peter as he loveth him, to feed his sheep, and lambs, Joh. 21. 15, 16, 17. His repeating this 3 times argues, 1. that he would have him very diligent in doing it. 2. that he takes it as a real demon∣stration of love to him, to feed his sheep. Now I have wonderful cause to love Christ, and good reason to demonstrate it that way which he would have me.

10. If I enter upon preaching on week∣day too, I see it will make for the Glory of God, Joh. 15. 8. God is glorified when we bear much fruit, and for the good, and edi∣fication of others; for the body of Christ is

Edified by the Ministry of the Word. Eph. 4. 11, 12. and why should I stand disputing that which may make for the glory of God, and the good of those among whom I live.

11. God would have every man observe his proper gifts and improve them, and attend his proper work that he is called to with dili∣gence. Rom. 12. 6, 7, 8, 11.

12. I have Naturally a slothful Spirit, and one good way to Master it, is to take up much imployment.

13. God would have us alway to abound in his Work and be stedfast, and he tells us our labour shall not be in vain. 1 Cor. 15. ult.

14. No excuse must hinder us now from do∣ing good, but what will serve turn at the day of judgment.

I consider further that the Word of God is to be the Rule by which we must walk. Psal. 119. 105. that is the light of our paths. What the Word requires of us, God requires of us; What work the Word calls us to, that God calls us to. Now considering with my self the aforesaid particulars according to the Word of God, I gather, it is the mind of God I should close with this motion, and that he calleth me to further work, and so accordingly I am to obey his voice.

Now in regard that it is Gods presence with me, his owning, accepting, and assisting me, that must bear me up against all difficulties that I shall meet with; I consulted further

with the Word to see what grounds I had to expect that God would be with me in my un∣dertaking, and I saw great encouragement from these Scriptures,

Mat. 28. 19, 20. Go teach—lo, I am with you alway. Christ will not withdraw his presence at any time when we go about to teach in obedience to his Command, but will be always with us.

1 Chron. 28. 10, 20. compared. Whence I observe, when God calls a man out to any work, he would have him be strong and do it, and not to fear or be dismayed, for God will be with him and not fail him or forsake him, till he hath finished it.

Josh. 1. 9. Have not I Commanded thee?—The Lord thy God is with thee whither∣soever thou goest. The same presence and assistance may we expect from God when ever he calls us out to any Service, which I gather from the Apostles applying to all Christians what God spake in particularto Josh. Heb. 13. 5.

Isa. 42. 6. I the Lord have called thee, I will hold thy hand. It is spoken to Christ, and shall be made good to all Christians, when called by God to any work, he will uphold them in it, and he whom God upholds shall not fail, or be discouraged till his work be done. v. 1. 4

Judg. 6. 12. 14. The Lord is with thee, thou mighty man. Go in this thy might, thou shalt save Israel—Have not I sent thee?

In this thy might, i. e. either in the strength of the promise. The Lord is with thee, or in the strength of thy Commission, I have sent thee. Doest thou doubt whether I will be with thee, seeing I have sent thee? Doest thou doubt whether thou shalt save Israel, see∣ing I have sent thee? I see hence the Call of God to any Service is a great encouragement to set upon it, and to expect success in it.

'Discouragements removed.

1. Reproach of men. What will men say or think that I am so forward. They will impute it to Pride, it &c. and say I am impru∣dent, and will, may be, laugh and jear at me.

Reply 1. I am not to be ashamed of the Gospel of Christ. Rom. 1. 16. No not in an Adulterous generation. Mar. 8. 38. If I can∣not suffer shame for Christ, how shall I suffer greater persecutions?

2. God can if he will, hide me from the strife of Tongues, yea he promiseth to do so for them that trust in him. Psal. 31. 19, 20. he can make a mans Enemies to be at Peace with him, and will if our ways please him. Prov. 16. 7. However I shall not be solici∣tous of mans judgment in this matter, but commit my way and Cause to the Lord, and if I be reproached he will one day clear me. Ps. 37. 5, 6.

3. If I do meet with shame and reproach

for my diligence in Preaching the Word, 'tis no more than the Apostles met with. 1 Cor. 4. 9, 10, 13. yea, I, Christ suffered great contradiction in his Preaching, they said he was Mad, and had a Devil, and I am bidden to remember it, as that which will keep me from fainting. Heb. 12. 3.

4. If I Serve Christ, the Lord will honour me, and that is infinitely above the honour of the world. Joh. 12. 26. I shall desire there∣fore to seek the praise that is of God, and no matter what men say.

5. It will be my happyness, if I be re∣proached for Christs sake. 1 Pet. 4. 14. and I should be so far from being troubled, dis∣couraged, and dejected at it, that I should rejoyce exceedingly that God counts me worthy to partake of the sufferings of Christ. v. 13.

6. The thoughts of that Glory that shall be revealed hereafter. 1 Pet. 5. 4. should cause me to despise the shame which I meet with here in the Service of God. Heb. 12. 2.

2d. Discouragement. It may be the peo∣ple will slight the Word, I shall have but few hearers, the Word growing common will be nauseated, &c.

Reply 1. The hearts of all men are in Gods hand, if he touch their hearts, they shall come. 1 Sam. 10. 26. I will leave that to the

Lord, whether he will encline many, or but few to attend upon his Word.

2. The Angels those glorious Creatures did not disdain to Preach Christ to a few poor Shepherds, and therefore I should not think much to Preach Christ, though to never such a thin Congregation. Jesus Christ himself Preached the Gospel to one hearer only, and that a poor sinful woman of Samaria. Joh. 4.

3. Gods presence is not tied to a multitude; if but two or three be gathered together in his Name, he is in the midst of them, and if God will bless his Word for the Conversion of but one Soul, it is worth all our labour and pains. Mark. 8. 37. Jam. 5. 19, 20.

4. I shall desire to do my work to God and not to men, because God Commands me, though men may slight my pains, and do not gather together to hear the Word, yet my work is before the Lord, and my reward with him, and I shall be glorious in his eyes, however I appear before men, Isa. 49. 5. However men reckon of my labours, though the more I love them and labour for them, the less I beloved, yet this should not be any hindrance to me in the work of God, but I should gladly spend my self and be spent there∣in. 2 Cor. 12. 13.

Having Consulted God, and seeing such good ground for my undertaking, I set up a Lecture once a Fortnight on Thursday in

the Afternoon at three of the Clock. I be∣gan it on the first Thursday in June. 1657.

With such mature Deliberation, such a re∣solved Conscience, such a willing mind, such a zealous Spirit, such a laborious head and hand did this worthy Servant of God apply himself to the great Work wherein he was en∣gaged. Thus did he fortifie his heart with strongest Arguments against all temptations to sloth and negligence. Thus searched he the Scriptures that he might fully know his Lords will. Thus yielded he obedience to the Com∣mands, and acted Faith in the promises of God. In this his might he went forth in the Name of the Lord, to the work of the Lord, and the plea∣sure of the Lord did prosper in his hand.

Though his constant weekly work at St. Andrews Church were enough to exercise more than ordinary strength both of mind and body, yet he had many other occasions of Service which he attended, not only in the Colledge as his place required, especially as a Tutor, which relation and trust he diligently and faithfully discharged towards his Pupils, both as to Learning and Religion, but in the Town, as Preaching frequently Funeral Sermons, and Trinity Lecture, and in the Country also at several Lectures, both in Cambridgeshire and Huntingdonshire. For his Abilities and wil∣lingness were so well known as encouraged many invitations to be made to him from abroad. All which he performed not after an extempo∣rary

rate, as the manner of some is, hastily to utter quicquid in buccam venerit, but as a workman that needed not to be ashamed. On which account the Ears of so many hanged up∣on him, and he never wanted a full Auditory as well of Schollars, as Town-people. His Ser∣mons were well studied and digested, his mat∣ter Substantial and Spiritual, his Arguments strong and convincing, his utterance full, clear, deliberate, and grave. His words apt and natural to express the Conceptions of his mind, he neither affected a strain of words, which mans wisdom teacheth, nor allowed himself a liberty of words which mans indiscretion poureth out; but his Phrase was such as spake him to have an holy Reverence for the plainness, and simplicity of the Gospel of Christ, a due care that he exposed not the Ministry of the word to Contempt, a Religious fear of that God in whose Name he spake, and a serious regard to the Concernment of the Souls of men. And in all his Applications to God by Prayer both in publick and private, his beha∣viour, words, and manner of utterance were such as spake his solemn, and affecting appre∣hensions of the Majesty, and Holiness of God whom he Worshipped. So as considering his years, the multiplicity of his Ministerial work, his manner of performing it, and the holiness of his life wherewith he did adorn and commend it; it may be truly said of him, that however he was excelled by others in other respects, yet in this

he was Nulli secundus, if not a None such in the University in his day.

But Cambridge is not a place for long con∣tinuance. The University is the Church's Nur∣sery from whence God is wont to remove, and transplant his trees of Righteousness when once grown up to the Stature of Fruit-bearing, that the various Congregations of his people may eat of the fruit thereof and live. God having here trained up his Servant to his hand, In∣structed him with excellent Gifts, and abun∣dant Grace, called him solemnly to the Office of the Ministry, proved him an able and suc∣cessful Instrument before many Witnesses, and enlarged his heart not only to a willingness, but zeal to discharge his Office with all his might, quickly shewed him the place where, with this resolved Industry, and Integrity he should im∣prove his Talents. Scarce two Months were expired after he had begun his Week-day Le∣cture, when the Mayor and one of the Alder∣men of Colchester in Essex (whither his fame reached) applied themselves to him at Cam∣bridge, desiring him to accept their Lecturers place then void. With which motion he so far only then complied as to promise to come over to them, and Preach a Sermon or two among them; which he performed about three weeks after.

After his Preaching, the House of Alder∣men and Common Council met, and unani∣mously agreed to choose him to be their Town-Lecturer,

to Preach on Lords days Afternoon, and on the Wednesday every Week. Which choice had also the general Suffrage of the Sober and Godly people in Town, and Country thereabout.

Which being signified to him by some of the Aldermen and Common Council, after six weeks deliberation (for so long time he de∣signed to give his Answer) seeking God for direction, as his constant manner was, having no objections before him as to Conscience in the case, nor any obligation to stay at Cambridge, save only the peoples desire, which he Answer∣ed from Luke 4. 42. 43. and Act. 18. 20. and considering the joynt unanimous agreement of persons different in Judgment (for it was a divided place) in calling him, he consented to their Choice, and undertook that Charge.

As he had experienced Gods owning and Sealing of his Ministry in his first Catechistical Exercise in the Colledge, and his first Sermon after his Ordination, with much happy suc∣cess also in Cambridge; so here he had the same encouragement, God making his first Sermon effectual upon the heart of a Dutchman, and his second or third upon another person noted for a Sinner, who came out of Novelty to hear him. Concerning whom he might say as St. Paul, 1 Thess. 1. 9. They shew of us, what manner of entring we had to you.

But it fared with him here at Colchester, as it did at Cambridge, he thought he did not

work enough, and therefore asked leave, and freely offered himself to preach also on the Lords day Mornings at St. James's Church, not desiring any outward reward for it, which was granted and accepted.

He was to this place a very great Blessing, not only as to their Spiritual, but Temporal concerns also. It was observed that during his abode, and the liberty of his Ministry there, the Town prospered and exceedingly flourished in Trade. For even the good things of this life doth the Gospel carry with it.

Here he laboured in the Word and Doctrine, till by the Act of Uniformity he was with the rest of his Brethren debarred from the publick Exercise of his Ministry. Yet not thinking himself bound to be his own Executioner, and there being mutual obligations by Contract be∣tween the Town and him, that the one should not eject, nor the other desert without so long warning, he did after the fatal Bartholomew continue his publick Preaching some time till, having occasion to take a Journey into Cam∣bridgeshire, in his absence another was put into his place by the B. of L.

From thenceforth with St. Paul, Act. 28. 30, 31. he dwelt three whole years in his own hired house, and received all that came in unto him, Preaching the Kingdom of God with all confi∣dence; till God sent the raging Pestilence into the Town An. 1665. at which Providence he was greatly affected, and while he saw many,

and even the Shepherds of the flock, hastening their flight from the pestilence that walked in darkness, and the Destruction that wasted at noon day, and others smitten with the Arrows of the Almighty, daily passing into eternity, Such compassion he had for perishing souls, and Such Zealous desire of their salvation, and Such hope that the word might be more effectuall in that day of Gods sore Judgment, that he sent to the Magistrates, and freely of∣fered, if they would indulge him the liberty of a publick Church, to stay and preach to that poor distressed people, till either God should take him away by death, or cause the pestilence to cease. Which being denied him, he enter∣tained thoughts of removing out of Town. And having sought of God a right way for him∣self, his little ones, and his substance. He re∣ceived Satisfaction concerning the lawfulness of removing, in time of Pestilence, from Isa. 26. 20. Hide thy self for a little moment, un∣til the Indignation be over past, and encourage∣ment to hope that the presence of God should go with him, from Gen. 28. 15. I am with thee and will keep thee in all places, whither thou go∣est &c. adding thereto Gal. 3. 7, 9. where he observed that all Believers have right to the promises made to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Accordingly, Aug. 25. 1665. He removed his Family to Chattisham ••n Suffolk about 12 miles distant from Colche••••er.

Being now come to a place, where he was

a perfect stranger, having no acquaintance with the neighbour-hood, and considering the evil and danger of the times. He had many doubts and fears within himself concerning the comfort of his abiding there; but quickly re∣ceived satisfaction from the holy Scriptures, his dailydelight and Counsellers, which he thus recorded.

Aug. 27. Being the first Sabbath after I came to Chattisham. In the morning as I was reading in my private devotions, Ezek. 37. which was the Chapter that fell out in course, in my private reading, I was much affected with some passages in the beginning of the Chapter. From whence I observed for my instruction. 1. Not to question my call to Chattisham though it should be a dry place, where I should want that communion of the Saints, which I had at Colchester, and my wonted opportunities of doing and re∣ceiving Good. Ezekiel a prophet of the Lord, fitted by his gifts, and call to do God Service, when he was carried into a valley where there was no living creature to converse withal, but dead mens bones, yet he was carried thi∣ther by the hand and spirit of the Lord. ver. 1. 2. God may have Special Service for us to do, in those places were we judging ac∣cording to sense, think there can be no op∣portunities of ••ervice at all. Who would have thought there had been any work for Eze∣kiel, as a prophet amongst dead mens bones,

yet even there he had Prophesying work, and composed that Prophecy which raised up the dying faith, and hope of the whole House of Israel. 3. When God commands us to Prophesie or to preach his word, the greatest improbabilities of Success imaginable, should not discourage us from our work. Though we should think there is no more hopes of do∣ing good, to them, to whom we preach, than there is by speaking to the wind, or Preach∣ing to dead mens bones, yet we should go on with our work. Ezekiel at Gods com∣mand Prophesies to dry and dead bones, (concerning which when he was asked whe∣ther they could live, he replied, that he could not tell, God only knew. v. 3.) And they have the Spirit of life breathed into them. He Prophesieth to the wind and that obey∣eth. v. 9. 10. This Scripture being so suited to some reasonings, and doubts that I had upon my mind, and coming so season∣ably, at my first fixing at Chattisham I was much affected with it, and looked upon it as a token for good, that I should have Gods presence with me, and the teachings of his Spirit, at Chattisham, as I have had them at Colchester.

The encouragement which he thus took was not vain and empty, God remembred his word unto his Servant, wherein he had caused him to hope. For he not only enclined the hearts of the people among whom he lived,

though strangers to him, to pay him that Re∣spect and Honour, which was due to him; and indulged him the liberty of private Preaching, as he had before enjoyed, but moreover open∣ed to him in this place a door for the frequent publick exercise of his Ministry, which was shut against him at Colchester.

The Minister of the Parish having another cure, by reason whereof he could attend this at Chattisham but once a fortnight, did in his absence not only willingly but thankfully in∣dulge to Mr. Stockton the liberty of his Pulpit. And having a very small maintenance, and some burdens lying heavy upon him, which after a few years, made his residence there very uneasie to him, he deserted his charge, and left this flock to shift for themselves. Where∣upon at the request of the people Mr. Stockton frequently supplyed that vacancy. And his Zeal provoked and encouraged others also, both Ministers and People. For other neigh∣bouring Parishes being destitute of Ministers, for want of maintenance called in the help of Non-Conformists, who in these places, so much below envye, have enjoyed the liberty of their publick Preaching for the most part to this day, So as not only the Parish where he lived, but the neighbouring Vllages have abundant cause to bless God for sending, to them so hap∣py an Instrument, so willing and Zealous, so able and industrious to serve their Souls in the Gospel of Christ.

When it pleased his Majesty to set forth his most Gracious Declaration for Indulgence, he was chosen both by a Congregation in Ipswhich and another in Colchester to preach to them, And both being very desirous of him, he com∣plied with their desires as far as he could, and undertook half the Service of either, and so with others divided his labours between them, during his life, to their great Satisfaction and edification.

His labours were abundant. His Ministry was his whole business: Besides his Lords days service, wherein he not only preached twice, but oft expounded the Scriptures, and Cate∣chised the younger sort, and many times dis∣coursed particular Christians that applyed, themselves to him for Counsel and instruction about their Spiritual cases; He moreover preached a Lecture at Ipswich on the weekday once a fort-night, and scarce a week passed but he preached at some other Lecture or fune∣ral besides keeping of private fasts which he frequently practised both at home and abroad.

The providence of God over him, while he was thus Zealously, and constantly imployed in his work, in so many places was so remarka∣ble, that it must not be passed over without special observation. Notwithstanding the Severity of the Laws, the malice, watchful∣ness, and endeavours of Adversaries, yet God Suffered not an hair to fall from his head, though Complaints, Informations, Indictments,

Convictions, Warrant, Presentments, Excom∣munications were made against him, yet was he never imprisoned, apprehended, distrained or brought before any Court or Magistrate. He was much affected with this care of God over him, and thankfully accepted, and recorded it as the instance of Gods faithfulness, and performance of his promise, as the answer of his own faith and Prayer, and as the reward of his love and Zeal, and courage for God and his Church by the power whereof he lived above fears and dangers; for thus he writes.

Apr. 16. 1655. Being Lords day, In the morning, I awaked with that Scripture in my thoughts. 1 Tim. 1. 15. I dwelt a while upon it, and drew comfort and relief for my faith, by the help of God. I had been before under a great sense of the sinfulness of my heart. The comfort I had was, that Christ came to save the chief of Sinners, that this was a faithful saying, that it was worthy all acceptation, or to be embraced by every one, and that this Salvation was from sin as well as from hell, Math. 1. 21. Considering whe∣ther he would save me, as I was going to wash in the morning, I was satisfied from Joh. 6. 37. Him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. It being then a time of danger, as to the keeping of my Meetings, because many Souldiers were in Town, I being dubious whe∣ther I should admit the people to come to my

house, when I considered that Christ took it as an act of Love to feed his sheep Joh. 21. 15. and that he exposed himself to Death to save me, and bring under a sense of the Com∣fort that the Lord had given me in the morn∣ing in my Meditations on the 1 Tim. 1. 15. I was willing to adventure my self on the Pro∣vidence of God.

Sept. 19. As I was Expounding in my Fa∣mily the 91 Psalm on a day of Humiliation, I was much encouraged to go on in my Cal∣ling notwithstanding the difficulties that at∣tend the same by reason of many Adversaries, from v. 11, 12, 13. Though the Adver∣saries to private Meetings, and the Preaching of Non-Conformists be of several sorts, as strong as Lions, as full of venom as the Dra∣gon, such as are greedy of, and roar after the prey like the young Lion, as subtle and pertinacious, and obstinate in their way as the Adder (of which see Ps. 58. 4, 5.) yet the Angels have a charge to keep us in all our ways, and the promise is that we shall trample these under our feet. This promise gave me courage whilst at Colchester, and I saw it made good; for I went on in my Calling and had no harm from them.

I observed also in reading Dan. 6. 23. the power of Faith to deliver out of great and im∣minent danger. Daniel is cast into a Den of hungry Lions, yet no manner of hurt is found upon him, because he believed in his God.

Sept. 22. In my Family exercise as I was reading Ps. 146. 9. The Lord preserveth the Strangers, my Faith received strength. I enjoyed much peace and security in Colchester, I had met with no molestation either from the Town or County, but being come into a strange place where I was not known, and had no friends to shelter or speak for me, I apprehended my self to walk in more danger than before; this word, The Lord preserveth the Strangers, did help my dependance upon God.

Oct. 28: 1666. Being Sabbath day, I went forth to Preach at Manitree. In the morning before I went, the Lord gave in that promise Isa. 55. 12. Ye shall be led forth with peace. It being a time of trouble and danger for Non-conformists to Preach pub∣lickly, the promise was the more precious, and I was encouraged to go on with confi∣dence. And I determined to eye this promise for the future, when I should go forth where I might probably meet with disturbance.

Dec. 25. 65. As I was reading in my course Luke 6. I observed from v. 11, 12. from Christs practice who in those days when his Enemies were filled with madness against him, and Communed one with another what they might do unto him, went out into a Mountain to pray, and continued all night in prayer to God. I observed, I say, hence that it was my du∣ty to give my self much unto prayer, at such

times as I had any Enemies that laid wait for me to do me hurt.

Within a day or two after one of the Con∣stables came to me, and told me that his fel∣low Constable when he had drunk somewhat liberally, opened his heart to him, and told him that there had been some Communication be∣tween him, and one of the Deputy Lieute∣nants about presenting me at the Sessions, and about my Meetings. I thought upon that place in Luke 6. 11, 12. after he was gone, and went up into my Chamber to pray. And as I was meditating on this matter that Scrip∣ture Deut. 33. 12. was brought to my remem∣brance. The beloved of the Lord shall dwell in safety by him, &c. I was strengthened in my ad∣herence to this promise, because God had lately made out his love to my Soul, as I was pleading this promise in prayer, that passage was set home, He shall cover thee all the day long. Whence I did hope that the Lord who had helped me hitherto, would still cover me under the sha∣dow of his wings. After I had been at prayer I considered Jacobs carriage, when he was in danger of suffering by his brother Esau: After he had been wrestling with God in prayer, and pleading the promise, he betook himselfto the use of the most probable means for appeasing Esau. I also used the most probable means to prevent trouble at the ensuing Sessions, and it pleased God so to order things at the Sessions that I met with no trouble. Blessed be God

who alone maketh me to dwell in safety.

Jun. 22. As I was exercising in my Fa∣mily in the Afternoon several of my friends being with me, I had word sent me that the Mayor and Justices would come down to my house; whereupon being near the end of my Exercise, I quickly concluded. After I had done and dismissed the people, one of the Constables came to me, and told me he was sent to dissolve my Meeting, but had a trem∣bling upon him when he spake to me. He added, that he blessed God that had given him an heart to come some times himself, and his Wife to my Meetings; so that instead of doing me any hurt he gave glory to God that inclined him to come to hear me.

In Octob. 1670. I was presented in the Ecclesiastical Court for Preaching. But God stood by me, and encouraged me with that word, Ps. 103. 31. And though my Adver∣saries proceeded so far as to get out an Excom∣munication against me, yet the Lord raised up deliverance for me, that the Court took off my Excommunication, without appearing before them or paying any Fees.

Yea, so far was he from declining the exer∣cise of his Ministry for fear of suffering, that when he had been persuaded thereto by the im∣portunity of friends, he was much dissatisfied, concerning which thus he records.

I promised Mr. B. to Preach at White Colne on Octob. 23. accordingly on Saturday I was

prepared to go. H. P. came in and told us that the Soldiers had seized Mr. B. and im∣prisoned him, and that it would not be safe for me to go at that season; all my friends and Relations dissuaded me, but notwithstanding my mind stood to go. But being importuned to stay, and having been very lately sought after by name by the Soldiers in those parts, and weighing the Providence in sending H. P. to my house with this Intelligence as I was about to take Horse, I determined to cast my self on my Brother Cole's determination, who was then at my house, and he determining that I should not go, I stayed at home. But that night and the next day I was under much despondency of Spirit, for missing such an opportunity of Service; yet God was gracious to me, and revived me. It was some stay to my mind what I read, Mat. 16. 20. Where I observed, that the divulging of the most necessary truths was at some seasons, and in some places prohibited by Jesus Christ. I was further satisfied from Act. 16. 6, 7. whence I observed, that the frustrating of our Attempts and designs to Preach the Gospel to particular places that we purposed to go to, did sometimes arise from the Holy Ghost. And from Psal. 52. 9. I had a damp upon my Spirit, and was hindred from praising God for my deliverance from my Enemies hands, because I had missed an opportunity of Service. But this Scripture convinced

me that I ought to praise God for this Provi∣dence, though attended with some afflicting Circumstances. By these Scriptures and Prayer I obtained satisfaction, and the Lord Answered my desire and fully quieted my mind.

Once a very zealous and active Prosecutor of the Non-conformists, obtained a Warrant against him upon the Oxford Act, directed to all the Chief Constables, and petty-Constables in the County, to apprehend him. Accordingly an Officer a stranger came to Execute it, and when he was nigh the house, he espied two persons, whom by their habit he judged to be Ministers, walking in a field, the one was Mr. Stockton, the other Mr. Senior of Hackney (whom God hath also lately taken away) He hasteneth to them, and told them he had a Warrant against one of them, but he knew neither, Mr. Senior asked which of them. He Answered Mr. Stockton. Let me see your Warrant said Mr. Senior, he shewed it him, verily concluding from thence that he was the man. Some Little Girls were there walking with them, who did industriously cling to Mr. Senior as if he had been their Father, which further confirmed him in his Error. While Mr. Senior read the Warrant, and the Officer was intent upon him, Mr. Stockton walked aside, and when Mr. Senior saw him beyond his reach, he convinced the Officer of his Error, who thereby was disappointed of his prey.

Being thus secured by the Providence of God through Faith and Prayer from the danger of Adversaries, he thankfully acknowledged the whole glory thereof to God, thus,

In reading 2 Chron. 20. 30. The Realm of Jehoshaphat was quiet, for his God gave him rest round about. God caused me to take notice, that my living in rest and quietness, being free from the molestation of my Ene∣mies was the gift of God, and came to pass by his Providence, not from the privacy of the place where I lived, or from the peaceable disposition of my Neighbours. I was also instructed what I should return unto the Lord, for keeping me from the hands of mine Ene∣mies, and giving me rest and peace, from Psal. 30. 1. I will extol 'thee, O Lord, for thou hast lifted me up, and hast not made my foes to rejoyce over me, and from Psal. 31. 7, 8. I saw further that Gods giving me rest from mine Enemies should put me upon doing some special eminent Service for God, from 2 Sam. 7. 1, 2. 1 King. 5. 4, 5. 1 Chron. 22. 17, 18, 19.

Thus with unwearied pains and zeal, in great peace and security, with holy rejoycing and thanksgiving did he fulfil the course of his Ministry.

Yet he satisfied not himself with his work of Preaching, but moreover applied himself to writing for the greater Service of the present and future Generation.

In the time of the raging Pestilence he wrote a Treatise relating to that sore judgment, but the Pestilence ceasing before he had finished it, he did not Publish it.

Upon occasion of the destroying Fire of Lon∣don, he composed and published his Counsel to the Afflicted.

Soon after he Published his Scriptural Cate∣chism with a Treatise of Family Instruction. And hath left behind him several other Manu∣scripts which he designed for the Press. As

• The Cure of the fear of Death.
• A Treatise of Glorïfying God.
• The Best Interest.
• A Warning to Drunkards.

Some of which at least 'tis hoped, may see the light.

The Holy Ghost by St. Paul to Timothy 1 Eph. 3. 4. among other qualifications of a good Minister requireth that he be one that ruleth well his own house, having his Children in subjection with all gravity. The due Cha∣racter of our Subject. His Treatise of Family Instruction did not reproach him. He was indeed, quantus Minister, tantus Pater Fa∣milias.

It pleased God in much mercy and faithful∣ness to him, to provide for him a Meet-help, a

most sutable Yoke-fellow, a very Prudent, Vir∣tuous and Gracious Gentlewoman, of a wor∣thy and Religious Family in Cambridgeshire, Mrs. Elianor Rant, Daughter of Roger Rant of Swaffham Esq; whom he took to Wife within less than a year after his Call to Col∣chester, who was a singular Blessing, Comfort, and Honour to him all his life. Few there be to whom Solomons commendation do more pro∣perly belong. Prov. 31. 26. &c. From thenceforth he had incumbent upon him the charge of a Family.

God gave him six Children, whereof he left one only Daughter surviving. Upon the ac∣count of his own and his Wifes approved Wis∣dom, Grace, Gravity and Government, ma∣ny were desirous to get their Children into his Family (even those who were of different persuasions from him, both in Conformity and Non-Conformity.) for their better Education; in compliance wherewith he received some Youth of the Female Sex, that might more properly belong to the care and inspection of his Wife. So as for the most part he had a full Family.

Wherein according to his place he kept up his Authority over all under his Charge, but with so much Meekness, Prudence, and Gra∣vity, that though all stood in awe of him, yet he was more loved than feared.

As to his Wife, whom he worthily honoured and entirely loved, there never arising any

Passion or Dispute between them. He fre∣quently conversed with her about the Matters of her Soul, Enquiring how the case stood be∣tween God and her Soul, what burdens lay up∣on her Spirit, what grounded hope she had for eternal life, &c. helping and encou∣raging her in the ways of Godliness. The 9th day of June, being the day of their Marriage, He never past it over, if at home, without spending some time with her in solemn pray∣er to God, and conference about the several passages of his providence towards them since they came into that Relation: In the conclu∣sion whereof he was always more affected with, and thankful for mercies, than dejected or cast down at afflictions, though he met with some considerable tryals, not only in his Family as the loss of so many hopeful Children, &c. but also abroad and that from those that knew better. It was his manner not only in his more private and secret retirements, but also in the performance of his family duty, to commend her particularly to God at the throne of grace.

As to his Children, very early before they were past the lap, he would himself be instruct∣ing of them, in Gods word, ordering them to get some Scriptures by heart, which best suit∣ed their childhood, and capacity; four of them died in infancy and Childhood, none having reached the full age of 5 years. Concerning whom he had much Satisfaction as to their Eternal salvation.

His first born a daughter attained to the age of 19 years and died, who had been so instruct∣ed by her Father, that before she was 8 years old, she under stood the method of a Sermon, and if Preached by her Father would give him an account of the most considerable heads and passages therein, and before she was full 9 years of age she would pen down a Sermon after him, and miss but few or none of the heads, with some considerable enlargement also.

About this time of her age, God Suffered her corruption to exert it self, in some open Acts to the observation of others, which exposed her to the severe rebuke of her Parents, which God sanctified to her conviction. And as she grew up she quickly gave evidence of the truth of Grace and power of Godliness, making progress therein beyond her years, having a great and Zealous love to the Ordinances, Ministers, and Servants of Christ, Dissembling the weak∣ness and infirmities of her body, that she might have liberty to attend the Ordinances of God for her Soul, walking closely with God in daily secret duty, strictly keeping the Sabbaths, taking speciall notice, of the workings of Grace, and Sin, and, Gods providential dealings with her, recording them in her diary, and under a long and mortal sickness, expres∣sing a most christian Patience and Submission, to the Will of God.

As to his Servants, so soon as they came into his family, he instructed them first in their

duty towards God, next in the duty of their places▪ giving them the evidence and authority of Scripture for that which he instructed them in, and expected from them, enjoyning them to get those Scriptures by heart which they were to keep in memory and repeat to him, as he called for them.

As to his family together, after his own person∣al secret retirement and devotion, in reading the Holy Scriptures in course, and Prayer, which was his first and last exercise, after his uprising, and before his downlying, His manner was in the morning seeking God, first by a short Prayer for a blessing to read some portion of Scripture, which he often also Expounded, and then to proceed to Prayer; and at night after the like reading of the Scripture, he required every Child that was capable, and Servant, to repeat one verse of that Chapter or some other Scripture which they had a desire might be explained to them, and of every such verse so repeated he gave the sense, and speak some∣thing to it before Prayer, often exhorting his family to a reverend demeanor of themselves in the worship of God, and would be much troubled when he understood, or discerned any thing to the contrary.

Once a week for the most part he did cate∣chise, both Children and servants either out of the Assemblies, or his own Scriptural Catechism and explained it to them: And once a fortnight if not diverted by urgent occasion, he went

over some principle of Religion, opening and explaining it in a Catiehistical way, which his Children and Servants were to give him an account of the next fortnight, and when they had so done, he proceeded to another principle, and thus he did from time to time. What sermons the Youth of the family heard upon the Lords day, or at any other time, they gave an account thereof to him as they could re∣member. He kept private days of Humilia∣tion with his family, as often as he could gain opportunity for it, on which days he would if not prevented, deal particularly with every one, or as many as he had time for, that was under his charge, about the matters of their Souls. And took care that all in his family should call upon God and Pray to him in secret, as well as be present at family duty. And when any of his Brethren came to vsit him. He was not willing to let them depart without Prayer. His Family was an house of Prayer. These his labours in his family God blessed and suc∣ceeded to the Spiritual good of several that came under his roof.

He was most tenderly conscientious in keep∣ing holy the Sabbath day, whereof he was a strict observer, and took care that all under his roof should do the same. He kept a very severe watch not only over his words, and acti∣ons, but his very thoughts also. Quickly re∣flecting thereon not only when vain and sin∣ful, but when impertinent to the holiness, and

duty of the day, whereof he hath left the fol∣lowing testimonies.

April. 29. 1666. My heart was much out of frame upon the Lords day, full of vain and Sinful thoughts. As I was going to prayer in the Afternoon alone, God brought to re∣membrance, Ps. 40. 12, 17. Innumerable evils have Compassed me about, mine iniquities have taken hold upon me, so that I am not able to look up—yet the Lord thinketh upon me. This was a stay to me.

Apr. 4. I went forth on several occasions, None of them succeeded. The first Contri∣vance of that journey was cast into my thoughts on the Lords day in a time of prayer, I laid it aside till Monday, and then consider∣ed further of it, and saw it convenient for the best ordering of my affairs. But not humbling my soul for those contrivances so unseasonably arising in my mind, I was cross∣ed in them. Hereupon I determined for time to come, when any thoughts or contrivances about ordering my affairs were cast into my mind on Lords days or on other days in time of holy duties, to lay them aside till a more con∣venient time; and if upon deliberation, that way of ordering my affairs seems best which was cast into my mind in time of holy duties, I would not hereupon neglect that way lest Satan should get advantage of me, but I would first humble my Soul for its wanderings and suffering such thoughts to arise so unsea∣sonably,

and took to Christ for pardon of the irregularities of my heart, and then not fear to order my affairs in that way, that seems most agreeable to reason, and neerest the rule of Gods word, though the Contrivance was first cast into my mind, at an unseasonable time.

Having a letter of Spiritual advice and Counsel to write to a friend, and having no spare time but on the Lords day, to do it, I was doubtful whether I might spend some part of that day on such imployment. As I was musing on my bed what I had best do, that Scripture came to my mind, Rev. 1. 10, 11. I was in the Spirit on the Lords day, and I heard a Voice saying, what thou seest Write in a Book, and send it to the seven Churches. Whence I Concluded it to be Lawful to write, as well as read, hear, meditate, and discourse of spirital matters on the Lords day.

His Charity had no less measure than the rest of his Graces, which he accounted one of the best characters of a Christian. Lamenting sometimes the divisions among Professors of re∣ligion, he would say, He did not value a Christian by his great knowledg and eminent parts, but by his great Charity and Love to his Brethren.

This he extended to various Sorts of objects▪ as,

Towards those who were at difference one with another. He was an industrious peace∣maker, offering himself to interpose, to make up the breach, taking journeys when at distance in order to it.

Towards those that had difference with him∣self about worldly concernes, from which he was not altogether free, though altogether innocent, when he suffered wrong by any, his care was, that they should suffer none by him, or his, either in word or deed, always practising himself, and counselling others to do good, a∣gainst evil. He would make the best con∣struction, that was possible, of the words, and actions of his adversaries, often making men∣tion of that Scripture, 1 Cor. 13. 5. Charity thinketh no evil.

Towards his Friends, his Friendship was hearty, ingenuous, faithful and open. He received them into his house gladly, entertain∣ed them liberally, conversed with them cheer∣fully, sympathised with them in their afflicti∣ons affectionately, and served them, as he had occasion, industriously.

Towards those that persecuted him, and o∣thers for Conscience, and Religions sake, he observed the command of Christ Math. 5. 44. He affcctionately pitied them, and prayed for them daily. And when he heard any passionate expressions against them for their violence, and unrighteousness, he would be offended, and charge people to pray more earnestly for them, and seek opportunities to do them good.

Towards those that dissented from him in the matters of God, he had a Spirit of meek∣ness and forbearance, embracing all with Christian Love, whose practice did not destroy

their profession of Christianity. Colchester was a very divided place, when he was called thither, upon the account of diverse persua∣sions, yet he so behaved himself with all humility, modiration, tenderness, Brotherly kindness, aad Charitable judgment, that they were gene∣rally united in their respects, and esteem for him. And though he could not with Satis∣faction to his Conscience, conform to all that the Law required, yet he judged many that did, to be very Good men, and had a real Honour for them.

Towards the poor, and such as were re∣duced to streights and difficulties in this world, he was pitiful and bountiful, He devised libe∣rall things, and drew out his Soul to the hungry. In the exercise whereof he observed our Sa∣viours rule Math. 6. 1, 2, 3. This indeed was one of his secrets which he always industriously, concealed as much as he could. Yet variety of objects bare witness to him.

The Widow, the Fatherless, the Stranger, the Sick, the Sufferers, have all been refreshed from his compassions. Though he offered to Preach freely at St, James's Church in Colches∣ter, on Lords day Mornings (as hath been be∣fore mentioned) not desiring or expecting any reward, yet the civility of the people did gra∣tifie him for his pains. The greatest part of which (I am assured from an hand privy to it) he distributed to charitable uses.

And this I read under his own hand.

Nov. 1. 1665. I made a Vow to God to give him the tenth of all that he should give unto me the ensuing year. That which oc∣casioned me to vow this Vow, was the reading, Gen. 28. which fell out that morn∣ing in my ordinary course; where I observed that most of those blessings, which Jacob mentions as his inducement to his Vow, God had given me. He had vouchsafed me his presence, he had graciously preserved and kept me from my Enemies, and the noy∣some pestilence, he had given me bread and Raiment, I added Pro. 3. 9. Honour the Lord with thy Substance, and with the first fruits of all thine encrease. I Considered also that what I gave to God should be fruit abounding to my account. Phil. 4. 17. Math. 25. 34, 35, 36.

I considered which way I should give it to God, and I saw from, Prov. 19. 17. that what was given to the poor was given to God: Especially what was given to the poor Saints and members of Christ, Math. 25. 35, 40. And as to the Suffering Ministers of Christ. I determined to bestow part of what I had dedicated to God, on them, and that though they were not brought to such extremities, as not to know how to Subsist. I was moved thereunto by, Phil. 4. 10, 11, 14, 18. The Apostle Paul was not in such want but that he knew how to live comforta∣bly, and contentedly, yet he saith the Phi∣lippians,

did well in Communicating with his afflictions, and tells them that their Charity towards him was an odour of a sweet smell, a Sacrifice acceptable and well pleasing to God.

Towards the Church of God in General, his indefatigable Labours in Preaching and Writ∣ing; his frequent Fastings and Humiliations, his fervent and wrestling Prayers for the peace of Jerusalem; his affectionate sympathizing with her in her Sufferings, are the undeniable Testimonies of his Love.

His own Liberality and stirring up of others thereunto, for the Education of such poor Schollars as were hopeful for the work of the Mi∣nistry is the effect of the same Principle.

To which must be added his Last-will and Testament, wherein out of pure zeal and Love to the Service and Enlargement of the Church, he hath bequeathed the greatest part of his well furnished Library, even the choicest and most valuable of his Books to Gonvile and Caius Colledge in Cambridge; with five Hundred pounds to be laid out by his Executrix in pur∣chasing a Free-hold Estate, or Impropriation to be setled upon the said Colledge, for the maintenance of a Schollar and Fellow there successively for ever. Providing that such on∣ly be Elected thereto, as are poor, or Orphans, or the Sons of poor Ministers of the best and most hopeful parts, obliging them to the Study of Divinity and the Ministerial work; taking special care that such be well grounded and

established in the Orthodox Faith, the true Reformed Protestant Religion; and in case any such Elected shall become corrupt in Doctrine, or Scandalous in life, then after due admonition, and Non-Reformation, his place to be declared void, and another to be chosen in his stead, and none to enjoy it longer than twelve years. Besides which he hath also be∣queathed, in Case his only Daughter shall die before she shall accomplish the Age of one and twenty years, Twenty pounds per Annum to be setled upon the Colledge in New England, for the Education of a Converted Indian, or any other that will learn the Indian Language to be a Minister, and go to Preach the Gospel to the poor Indians. (Nor was this the first expression of his pious regard to that remote part of the world, for when he heard of that wasting Fire that laid so great a part of Boston in N. E. in Ashes, he sent thither freely to be distributed among the Sufferers, a considerable quantity of his Books, Entituled Counsel to the Afflicted, which he had wrote upon the occasion of the Burning of London.) Beyond which he hath also given Twenty five pound to Chari∣table uses. Which bequests he hath made yet with all due respect to his Family, not in the least declining from the kindness of an Husband, or the tenderness of a Father, so ordering his Charity to others, as withal securing to his Widow and Fatherless Child, not only a ne∣cessary and Competent, but even a liberal and

plentiful Subsistence; reserving to them the Rent of what he hath bequeathed to the Col∣ledge during their Natural lives.

Hitherto the Reader hath had an account of this Eminent Saint given him for the most part from those Acts and Exercises of his life, by which he was visible to the discerning and judi∣cious eyes of those that knew him.

We shall now proceed to give a further ac∣count of those his own observations, and expe∣riences of himself through which we may look into the very frame and temper, the thoughts and affections of his heart, some of which he hath thus recorded.

His Observations and Experiences.

Jan. 10. 1653. In reading of Calvins In∣stitutions I met with that place in Isa. 44. 3. Upon the reading whereof (having been the the night before under Conviction of the em∣ptiness and barrenness of my Soul, and some despondency of Spirit thereupon) I conceived some hope, and found my Soul lifted up towards God, to wait for and expect the shedding abroad of his Spirit in my Soul, see∣ing he had said, he would pour it out upon the dry ground; but alas! the lively sense of this was but momentany, it was soon gone, and my old deadness of heart returned upon me.

Hence I observe that it is of singular use both for the Establishment of true, and dis∣cerning of false Comforts to see upon what

grounds our Souls take in, and upon what grounds they let go their Comforts.

The letting go of our Comforts oftimes proceed from our letting go of the promises. When Satan can prevail to beat us off from the promise, he will quickly rob us of our Comfort.

I find that at several times I have been kept under doubts, and fears, and jealousies, and yet have had no Scripture grounds for them, so that I perceive they proceede•• from Satan darkning my heart, and keeping me in unbelief, and trouble of Spirit.

Feb. 16. My Soul being dejected because after long w••iting upon God, for the fulfil∣ling of his Covenant in giving his Spirit, and carrying on the work of Faith, and Sanctification with power, it had found no sensible in-comes; when I was reading the Scripture according to my usual Custom, the Lord did rebuke the despondency of my Spi∣rit from those words of the Prophet Isa. 40. 27. Why sayest thou O Jacob, and speakest O Israel my way is hid from the Lord, and my judgment is passed over from my God. And did encourage my Soul still to hope in God, and wait for his strength from the following words. v. 28▪ 29. 31. Hast thou not known, hast thou not heard? (if thou hast not known it by experience having found his ever∣lasting Arms under thee for thy support, yet hast thou not at least heard it) that the ever∣lasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends

of the Earth fainteth not, neither is weary. He giveth power to the faint, &c. Continue thou therefore O my Soul, to wait upon the Lord.

Lord! what an accursed hard heart have I! that sin which grieves thee Gen. 6. 6. thy Son. Mar. 3. 5. thy Spirit, Eph. 4. 30. should not grieve me! that sin which wearieth thee Isa. 43. 24. should not be a burden to me! that I should not be troubled for want of thy Presence, when as the hiding of thy face made our Saviour cry out, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? That Eternity and Judgment to come should make no impression upon me, that I can hear, yea speak of thy Word, thy wrath, &c. and yet not fear thee, not tremble at thy Word, nor at this my Condition.

Feb. 19. Being Sabbath day. Having formerly perceived a desperate hardness in my heart, that that Word, which works up∣on others, should do me no good, that no means, no mercies did melt my Soul, and almost despairing of ever having it softened. After Prayer I was encouraged from the Lord in reading Mr. Hooker upon Act. 2. 37. who from those words, When they heard these things they (who had Crucified our Lord Christ) were pricked at the heart, raiseth this observation, It is possible even for the most stubborn sinner to get a broken heart. And now O my Soul, Why art thou cast down? Is not the Lord greater than thy heart? Can Satan be more malicious to destroy thee than the Lord is mer∣ciful

to save thee? Yet the actings of my Faith hereupon are but faint.

Upon Examination of my self, I have some∣times found that to mine own sense and feeling, I have been altogether void of any love or fear of God, and that I have been at such a time as unable to work up my heart into the Love and fear of God, as to say to this Mountain, Be thou removed and cast into the Sea. Such wonderful deadness hath seised upon my Soul, so greatly have I been enslaved, and held captive by Satan that I have not been able truly to desire the Spirit of God. O that my heart could bleed at the remembrance of this great evil, that I should not only be cut off from Communion with God, but be contented with this condition, that I should have no groanings in Spirit to be delivered from this miserable bondage. Be instructed hence O my Soul to ascribe every good motion to God, if thou feelest any hungrings after Jesus Christ, or any sorrow for want of Gods presence or the like, own it as his work, and bless him for it.

I have sometimes found my condition much like the man mentioned Joh. 5. who lay a long time by the pool of Bethesda, but was not able to put himself in, that he might be healed, even so it is with my Soul. Though God hath opened a Fountain for sin and for uncleanness to wash in, and I find my Soul exceedingly polluted, yet I am not able to step into this Fountain that I may be healed.

O my Soul, the Lord seeth thy weakness, and that thou hast been now a long time in this case, wait thou on God. Who can tell but that as the Bowels of Jesus Christ did yearn towards the poor man, so may his Compassions be great towards thee, and he may heal thee also. Cease not to importune him saying, Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me, O Lord, heal my Soul.

Having at several times found diverse workings upon my heart as Convictions, and thereupon some pantings and breathings after God, but as yet nothing come to perfection, I thought of and found that I had cause to take up the complaint of Hezekiah in another case, It is a day of trouble and rebuke, the Chil∣dren are come to the Birth, and there is no strength to bring forth. Isa. 37. 3. Some time after reading Isa. 66. it seemed to me that that word v. 9. was suited to my Case. Shall I bring to the Birth, and not cause to bring forth, saith the Lord? Shall I cause to bring forth and shut the Womb, saith thy God? O my Soul wait thou on God, who will perfect his own work in thee. He hath said, He will not break the bruised Reed, nor quench the smok∣ing Flax, till he sent forth judgment unto Victory.

I have oftimes seen a Law in my Members warring against the Law of my mind, and leading me into Captivity to the Law of sin and death.

So powerful and mighty have been the

Actings of some inward corruptions, that I have not been able to overcome them, but have been hurried Captive by them. Hereby I come to see that truth, the heart of man is desperately wicked, who can know it? I can∣not fathom the depth of iniquity which is in my heart. Hereupon I am made to cry out with St. Paul, O wretched man that I am, who shall deliver me from this body of Death? O Lord be not thou far from me, but make hast to help me, Let the sighing of the Prisoner come before thee, proclaim liberty to thy Captive, and the opening of the Prison door to him that is bound with the Chain of sin. Isa. 61. 1.

Mar. 26. 1654. I find that though in my judgment and Profession I acknowledge Christ to be my Righteousness and Peace, yet upon Examination I observe that my heart hath done quite another thing, and that secretly I have gone about to Establish my own Righteous∣ness; and have derived my Comfort and Peace from my own Actings. For when I have been disquieted by the Actings of my sin, that which hath recovered me to my former Peace, hath not been (that I could find) God speaking Peace through the blood of Christ, but ra∣ther from the intermission of temptation and the cessation of those sins; when I have been troubled at an evil frame of heart, I do not find that the Righteousness of Christ hath been my Consolation, but that which hath relieved me, as far as I can find, was that

afterward I found my self in a better temper. Having been in trouble and perplexity I have read the Scripture, gone to Prayer, and in doing these I have been relieved, yet I do not find that at such times I had real, true, living Communion with God in such duties, or that the Spirit of God did in those duties reveal to me my interest in Christ, and so quiet my Conscience. Hence I come to see what great need I have, and that it is of singular use to watch over my Soul in all its ways, both in reference to sin, that I fall not into it, and when fallen, what the Carriage and Actings of my Soul are at such a time; Whether I flee for relief to God in Christ, or to my own works: And in reference to my duties, to take heed lest those means which God hath appointed to be the conveyances of himself, his Son and Spirit, and all Spiritual blessings, should prove to me a mean of Death and Se∣paration from God, by my formal use of them and resting in them. For as Satan keeps some alienated from God by the gross pollutions of the world; So others from Christ by their Establishing a Righteousness of their own. O Lord, break thou this snare for me, and let my Soul escape as a bird from the Net, that I may flee to thee, and be at rest.

I have observed in my self, that when God at any time is pleased to work any thing in my Soul, I soon lose it; if he quicken me, I soon grow dead hearted again; if he enliven my

affections, they soon grow cold and flat, and my old hardness returns upon me. Hence I come to see that it is infinite Wisdom, and Goodness in God, that he hath not put the stock of grace into our own hands, but hath treasured it up in Christ, that our life is now hid with Christ in God, for so it becomes sure. Rom. 4. 16. hereby also I come to see that I have need of continual recourse to Jesus Christ, for new supplies of grace and strength.

The Lord God in his wisdom, was pleased when he delivered his people out of Egypt, before he brought them to Canaan, to lead them 40 years in the wilderness, when as he could have led them a nearer way to Canaan, Exod. 13. 17. He chose rather to lead them through the great and terrible Wilderness, Jer. 2. 6. where were fiery Serpents and Scor∣pions, and drought, where there was no wa∣ter, where he brought them forth water out of the Rock of Flint, and fed them with Manna, for this end that he might humble them, prove them, and do them good in the latter end, Deut. 8. 15, 16. Doest thou find it so, O my Soul, in thy travail towards the Heavenly Canaan: Doest thou walk through much Spiritual drought, a land of deserts, and of the shadow of death: Dost meet with a flinty heart, and fiery temptations? Know that the Lord doth this to humble thee. (which through his grace thou hast sometimes found,) and to prove thee, i. e, to discover thee to

thy self (for he himself knows thy thoughts afar off) and this way of God through grace hath been a means of discovering much of thy corrupt heart to thee) and that he may doe thee good in the latter end. Therefore take heed O my Soul of Israel's sins, of mur∣muring against God, under thy wants, of unbeleif, and tempting God, &c. Read oft and weight well the 78th Psalm.

May 6. being Sabbath day. The Lord was pleased in the hearing of his word to con∣vince me of my sin and lost condition. But Lord? How unfaithful was I then, and have I been since to the Convictions of thy Spirit! How soon have I healed up the wound that was given by the word? How soon hath an hard heart, a secure, careless Spirit taken possessi∣on of me! Lord, If ever thy word be effec∣tual in me, thou must not only speak it to my heart, but write and engraff it there also. Henceforth I desire to wait on thee, as for the teachings of thy Spirit, so for the writing of thy Law in my heart by thy Spirit. I found a lothness in my Spirit, to go to here this Sermon, whereby I perceive Satan would have hindred me. Be encouraged hence, O my Soul, to break through all difficulties thou meetest with in doing thy duty. When thou findest any secret unwillingness to ordi∣nances or duties, then stir up thy self to wait upon God, expecting that he hath some special mercy for thee, which Satan would hinder thee off.

Jun. 1. This day the Lord did, in the hear¦ing of his word, revive some convictions which have formerly been upon my Spirit, though in a very languid manner. I stood convinced before the Lord of unbelief, and that I was a lost creature because thereof, from the words of our Saviour, Joh. 3. 18. He that believeth not is Condemned already. Conscience tells me that I am yet in unbelief, that I want that faith which is accompanied with the new birth Joh. 1. 12, 13. that faith which should purge me from Atheism, formality, and resting in duties, from hypocrisie and deadness, from unclean affections, and inordinate Love of the world, from a vain mind, and a light Spirit; that faith which should purifie my heart, from these and the like evils, Act. 15. 9. that faith which should make Christ a greater Reality, and more precious to me than any thing in the world, 1 Pet. 2. 7. that faith which brings peace with God, and joy in the Holy Ghost, unspeakable and full of Glory, Rom. 5. 1. 1 Pet. 1. 8. I find I have had a dead faith. Jam. 2. 17, 20. and presumed upon Gods Mercy in Christ, although I have been estranged from God in my heart and Na∣ture, my Resting in duties, and trusting in my own Righteousness as far as I can see, hath been the deceit of my heart.

Lord lay this conviction upon my Consci∣ence, for I find my heart would put it off, yea it hath already desperately hardned it self

against thee. I fear I shall out-grow this Conviction of thy word, as at other times, I feel a careless Spirit, that would make light of Eternity, and of Jesus Christ. Lord, break my heart under thy word for my unbelief, and neglect of Christ. Let me not heal my self, but wait till thou shalt heal me.

Thou didst help the unbelief of thy Servant Thomas, Oh that thou wouldest help mine also.

The Lord hath shewn me that I am dead in sin not only from the testimony of his word, Eph. 2. 1. Col. 2. 13. but by inward experience. For I feel my self alienated from the life of God, cut off from communion with the Lord Jesus, separate from God and his blessed Spirit. My deceitful heart hath often gone about to repel this conviction, and hath caused me some∣times to mistake, a life of morality for Spiri∣tual life, and at other times a life of formality. But now I find the Scripture speaks of dead works, and calls for repentance from them. Heb. 6. 1. and purging our consciences from them, Heb. 9. 14. By dead works I under∣stand, not only the gross pollutions of the World, but all works whatever, that are done by a man, void of the quickning Spirit of God. Without Union to Christ there is no Spiritual life, for as the natural life results from the Union of the Soul with the body, and the State of death, is nothing but the disunion and Separation of the Soul from the body; so our spiritual life results from the

Souls Union with Christ, and spiritual death is our separation from him. Now I feel my self as a poor withered branch cut off from this Vine, unacquainted with the actings of this Spiritual life, as living by faith, Serving God in Spirit, Mortifying Sin by the Spirit, walk∣ing in the Spirit, loving God above all things, and seeking his Glory in all things. I have sometimes Prayed against sin, resolving a∣gainst it, striven with it, avoided occasions thereto (all which a natural man may do) but sin hath returned upon me, and overcome me. How to fetch power from Christs death to mortifie sin, how to believe in God for sub∣duing it, how to do it by the Spirit, these have been mysteries to me. Lord, When shall the day dawn, and the Day-Star arise in my heart? When shall the Day-spring from on high, visit my Soul, to give light to him that sits in darkness, and in the shadow of death? Come Lord Jesus thou light of life, Come quickly.

That which kept me a long time from resolving to give up my whole heart to God in Covenant, was a fear that I should break my Covenant and so double my sin. But I perceive since that this was but Satans po∣licy to keep my heart from God, and the true ground of my not doing this was not con∣scienciousness of sin, as Satan once made me believe, but a loathness to part with all sin, and to serve God with all my heart.

A Strong encouragement thou hast O my

Soul, to enter Covenant with God, to serve him with thy whole heart, from that portion of his Word, which thou didst read this morn∣ing, May. 11. 1654. in Jer. 30. 21, 22. Who is this that engaged his heart to approach unto me saith the Lord? Ye shall be my people and I will be your God.

Since my Covenanting with God I come to see more fully the truth of that place, Rom. 8. 7. The carnal mind is enmity against God, is not subject to the Law of God, neither indeed can be. For I find a Loathness to walk close∣ly with God, yea under a profession of Reli∣gion, my carnal heart hath been at enmity to the power and life of it, and this enmity hath lyen hid under, and been covered with a per∣formance of some duties, which have not been destructive to that evil principle that hath lived in me. Yea, I find my carnal heart is hungring after the flesh-pots of Egypt, after its old delights and sinful pleasures, is ready to murmur against God in the wilderness and speaks of returning into Egypt, and being impatient of the cross it revolts from God many a time, and seeks relief and con∣tentment from the creature.

Since my Covenanting with God I see more of thee treachery and hypocrisie of my heart, I found my Soul for a while more tender of Sin, and my heart seemingly engaged to serve the Lord. but I soon forgot the covenant that I had made, and in a short space I did not find

that my Covenanting had any influence on my heart or life. So that I see I did but flatter the Lord with my mouth, and lyed unto him with my tongue, for my heart was not right with him, neither was I stedfast in his Cove∣nant, Ps. 78. 36, 37. My unstedfastness in my Covenant with the Lord, did arise as far as I perceive from these two grounds, 1. My heart was not right with God when I made it, there was not that inward, cordial, full re∣solution to part with all Sin, and that for ever, from an antipathy to it, and dislike of it, neither that inward resolution of cleaving to God, to have him my All in All, to take all my contentment and joy in him, and to seek it in nothing else, which should have been. 2. I neglected my watch, and did not (as I should) renew my Covenant often, and engage my heart to walk with God, and while I was slothful, and negligent, my heart was stolen away by the Devil, and the World, and is now in league again with Sin. Lord, make me upright, and clear up to me my Sincerity, Search me and try me, and let me know the bottom of my heart. Keep me up∣on my watch and guard, that I may keep my Covenant.

Jul. 23. The Lord did awaken my Con∣sience to such a sense of my sin, and lost e∣state in the reading and hearing of his Word, that when I went to Prayer, I was before him as a lost creature, being under wrath and the

sentence of death, lying in my blood and pollution. Now whereas before I found my heart carried out in begging Sanctification, I did now cry to God for the blood of Christ to wash away the guilt of my sin, I did not be∣fore prize Justifying Grace so as now in some weak measure I was made to doe. But I soon found an accursed hard heart, in a little time I did not tremble at the wrath of God. I have laboured to work these convictions up∣on my heart, but I found such a roving heart, such a slighty heart so possest with vanity that nothing would abide with it. Lord, un∣less thou savest me for thy mercies sake, I perish.

Aug. 6. being Sabbath day. In meditati∣on on 1 Joh. 3. 23. This is his command∣ment that we should believe on the Name of his Son Jesus Christ. Considering with my self what this did imply, viz. not only a relying up∣on God in Christ, for the remission of Sin, but for the pouring out of the Spirit, Joh. 7. 38, 39. which Spirit when it is given will shed abroad the love of God in our hearts, Rom. 5. 5. and seal up the assurance of the remission of our sins, and witness our addoption, Rom. 8, 16. will mortifie sin in us v. 13. and work all the works of God in us, and for us, all which I want, and to which I haven been a long time con∣vinced that I am unable. And Considering further that this Spirit is the free gift of God, Ps. 51. 12. given not according to our works but of free mercy for the sake of Christ, Tit.

3. 4. 5, 6. And considering further that Jesus Christ had received Gifts (of which the Gift of the Spirit is intended) even for the rebellious, that God might dwell among them Ps. 68. 18. I found my heart encouraged to wait upon the Lord for the pouring forth of his Spirit upon me, that I might have my heart renewed and sanctified, and the remission of my sins sealed up to my Soul.

Afterwards considering further that the way whereby a poor soul that hath lost Gods image comes to be renewed in heart and mind and made partaker of the divine nature, is by faith in the promises, 2 Pet. 1. 4. and observing how Isaac who inherits the blessing was not born by the strength of Nature but by promise, and as Isaac was born through the promise, so are all believers, Gal. 4. 28. not of the will of man but of God, Joh. 1. 13. and that God giveth power to the faint, and strength to them that have no might in a way of waiting Isa. 40. 29, 31. I saw from these conside∣rations further ground of hope and waiting upon God, notwithstanding I find my strength perished from me.

Neither shall the guilt of my Sin discourage me from waiting on God, from expecting of his Holy Spirit, from going to Christ. The whole need not a Physitian, Christ deales with Sinners, Mar. 2. 17. He hath said, he will in no wise cast out them that come, to him Joh. 6. 37. why did he shed his blood to

wash away our sins. How is he the Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world, if he should cast off guilty Souls when they come unto him? Is there not a fountain opened for sin and for uncleanness to wash in? Zach. 13. 1. What though I be in my blood, yet if I go to Christ, he will not loath me, Ezek. 16. 6, 8. but will sprinkle clean water upon me and wash me from my filthyness, Ezek. 36. 25. When therefore I find guilt upon me, I will look to Jesus Christ in such promises as these, Isa. 1. 18.—43. 25, 26.—44. 21, 22. I will cry unto him that I may have the pardon of my sin Sealed up to my Soul in these promises by his Holy Spirit.

Neither shall my rebellious heart, the per∣verseness, and corruption of my Nature dis∣courage me, but I will with David beg a new heart and a right Spirit, Ps. 51. 10. I will say as Ephraim, Jer. 31. 18. Turn thou me and I shall be turned. God hath sent Christ to bless us in turning us from our iniquities Act. 3. 26. and to destroy what Satan hath wrought in us. 1. Joh. 3. 8. therefore when I feel sin prevail and lead me captive, I will with Paul cry out of this body of death, Rom. 7. 24. and go to God in Jesus Christ, through such promises as these, Mic. 7. 18, 19. Rom. 6. 14. Math. 11. 28. Isa. 45. 22. Jer. 31. 33. Ezek. 36. 26.

When I feel my self graceless, I will look to him who is full of grace, Joh. 1. 14. 16. and

hath promised to give grace, Ps. 84. 11 even an heart to love him, Deut. 30. 6. and to put his fear into us, Jer. 32. 40. and to with∣hold no good thing, if we endeavour to walk uprightly before him, Ps. 84. 11.

When I find the plague of an hard dead heart upon me, I will look unto the Lord, who quickens the dead, Rom. 4. 17. and can raise Children to Abraham out of Stones, Math. 3. 9. I will look unto him in his Covenant, promising to take away the heart of Stone, and to give an heart of flesh, Ezek. 36. 26.

In time of desertion, when God withdraws the comfortable influences of his presence, I will not be discouraged, but I will search my heart, and try my ways, and see what cause I have given the Lord to depart from me, Lam. 3. 40. Josh. 7. 11. 12, 13. Isa. 59. 2. I will earnestly seek the Lord that he would return, and shine upon me, and lift up the light of his countenance upon my Soul, Ps. 80. 3.—89. 46. Hos. 5. 15. I will not only pray, but wait for his return, Ps. 130. 5, 6. Isa. 8. 17. Lam. 3. 2, 3. &c. with 26. and in waiting I will look unto the Lord in these, or like promises. Ps. 103. 8, 9. Isa. 54. 6, 7, 8.—57. 16, 17, 18. Lam. 3. 31, 32. Hos. 6. 1, 2, 3. Joh. 14. 18.

When I have neglected my watch, and fallen, and been unstedfast in Covenant with God I will not despair but look to God in Christ, that he would pardon my sin, grant me repentance, and restore me. The Co∣venant

of grace admits of repentance after sin, Levit. 26. 21. 40. 41, 42. Yea God hath exalted Christ to give repentance, Act. 5. 31. hath promised to heal back-slidings, Hos. 14. 4. invites backsliders to return, Jer. 3. 1, 12, 13, 14.

How did David behave himself when Ini∣quities prevailed over him? He goeth to God, to purge away his transgression, Ps. 65. 3. he maketh Supplication to God that he would not cast him out of his presence, Ps. 51. 11. he confesseth his sin, and God pardons him, Ps. 32. 5. which should encourage, all the Godly when they have fallen, to return to the Lord ver. 6. St. John layeth strict charge upon Believers, that they sin not, but in case of Sin he would not have them despair, 1 Joh. 2. 1, 2. Solomon prayed to this purpose, 1 Kings. 8. and God accepted. ch. 9, 3. When therefore thou hast fallen, O my Soul, by thine iniquity, and God hid his face, and with∣draws his gracious presence, let thy uncircum∣cised heart be humbled, accept of the punish∣ment of thy sin. Turn unto the Lord and and say, Take away all iniquity and receive me graciously, So will I praise thee, Lev. 26. 41. Hos. 14. 2. Let not thy falls cause thee to depart from the Living God. Though thou hast played the harlot with many Lovers yet the Lord calleth thee to return, Jer. 3. 1. God commands us to forgive our Brother, seven times a day, if he return and repent, Luk. 17. 4. yea not only seven times, but

seventy times seven, Math. 18. 21, 22. And will not God much more forgive us though we fall oft, if we return and seek his face, Seeing his ways are far above our ways? Isa. 55. 7, 9.

Dec. 9. 1655. Having found much forma∣lity in my duties on the Sabbath, and seeing my self lost in them, I put the question to my Soul, what if thou die this night? What is thy hope? How wilt thou appear before God? Righteousness of thine own thou hast none to trust to, thou seest how thou sinnest every day, and how full of sin thy best duties are. Upon this enquiry the good Spirit of God brought to my remembrance, 1 Cor. 1. 30. God hath made Christ Righteousness to us, and Jer. 23. 6. This is the Name by which he shall be called. The Lord our Righteousness, which was com∣fort to me, and enquiring what warrant I had to believe my self to be a sharer in this Righteousness, and that I stand accepted of God, by vertue of this Righteousness, I saw from, Rom. 3. 21, 22. that this Righte∣ousness is upon all that believe. Now through the Lords goodness, and to his Praise be it spoken, I have oftimes found my heart not only to long after pardon, and renovation, but to trust in Christ and in God through him, for pardoning mercy and renewing grace, and all other good things.

Dec. 16. I found the Lord graciously pre∣sent with me in my morning meditation on my

Bed. And my Soul was much refreshed with Mr. Simond's Sermon. God spake a sutable word by him to my Soul from Mat. 15. 23. But he answered her not a word. God may sometimes defer to give an Answer to a gracious and well qualified Prayer. 1. To correct our deafness to his voice. 2. To put us upon more earnest seeking of him. 3. To exercise and try our graces. God proportions mer∣cies according to his delays, they are the greater when given in. Sarah tarried long for a Son, and then had an Isaac. So did Hanna, but then had a Samuel. So Eliza∣beth but then had a John, my heart rejoyced at this, hoping that God would give an high degree of brokenness of heart in his own due time, though at present my heart were hard. And I remembred how hard Mr. Bradfords heart was once as to his own sense, and how eminent he was afterward for tenderness, as M. Fox Relates. God was very good this day. But Oh! how vile and sinful was I! I felt a very proud vain-glorious heart both in hearing, and after Sermon was done. But the Lord chastised me for it. For at night when I Preached in the Chappel the Lord for∣sook me, I found no assistance of his Spirit, either in Prayer or Preaching, but was much confounded in both, having little or no sense of the things I spake of, or prayed for.

We read of Naaman 2 King. 5. 11. that he expected a Miraculous way of cure. I

thought said he, he will surely come out and stand and call on the Name of the Lord his God, and strike his hand over the place, and recover the Leper. So have I found my self apt to expect that the Spirit of God should mortifie and subdue sin in me without my striving against it. But I have learned it is the will of God, that I should strive against sin as well as pray and wait for his Spirit. Gods working in us to will and to do, excludes not our en∣deavouring. Phil. 2. 12, 13. Having pro∣mises let us cleanse our selves. 2 Cor. 7. 1.

Octob. 17. I was immoderate in the use of the Creatures, and though checked and re∣proved from within, yet I persisted. At night when I walked in my Chamber, con∣sidering what I had done, I was sad, and said to God, Lord I have Rebelled against thee. I had no sooner said it in my heart, but imme∣diately that word was brought to me. Dan. 9. 9. To the Lord our God belong mercies and for∣givenesses (he will forgive again and again) though we have Rebelled against him. O the wonderful goodness of God! be amazed, O my Soul, at this Love. Now I saw the pro∣mise (Isa. 65. 24. before they call I will an∣swer, and whilst they are yet speaking I will hear) made good to me. In the evening on my Bed considering on this Love of God, whence it should come to pass that the Lord should deal thus graciously with me, it was answered me from Mic. 7. 18. He passeth by

the transgression of the remnant of his heritage because he delighteth in mercy. Next morn∣ing at my first awaking the Spirit of God brought that Scripture into my thoughts. Ps. 65. 3. Iniquities prevail against me, as for our trangressions thou shalt purge them away. It came to me with some life and power, and was very sutable to my Condition. Oh the Goodness of God! the Riches of his Grace! that he should so soon come into my relief, and raise my Soul by his promise; this is mercy never to be forgotten.

Sept. 28. In meditation I found the Lord drawing forth my heart to close with Christ. I was convinced that God was willing to be∣stow his Son upon me, because he did not only invite me Isa. 55. 1. and Command me 1 Joh. 3. 23. but even beseech and entreat me to receive Christ. 2 Cor. 5. 20. I was further convinced of Gods real intention, and willingness to give me his Son from his patient waiting and long-suffering in expecting my return, even after much deafness to the voice of his Spirit, and dallying with his Grace, he still offers his Son to me, yea he presseth in upon me with the renewing of good motions and affections which I have quenched. Now whence is all this but from the Love and mer∣cy of God that he should be thus willing to have me take his Son? Now who am I that I should withstand God? Why should I forsake my own Mercies? Lord thou hast shewn me that

my former revoltings shall not hinder this thy mercy, if I will acknowledge my sin, re∣nounce my self, return unto thee and embrace thy Son. Jer. 3. 12, 13. O Lord, I thank∣fully accept thy offer of Grace, I come unto thee, Oh give me thy Son; behold, I give thee my self. Let me be Espoused to the Lord Jesus, I am willing through grace to take up my Cross, to deny my self, and to follow thee.

Nov. 1. Having set apart that day to seek the Lord, and to humble my Soul before him, I could not get my heart to be afflicted and mourn under sin, but found much lightness in Prayer, the Lord hid his face, and did not come in to my poor Soul with his quickning presence. So that I lay in a poor desolate, forsaken condition under much confusion, yet in the evening a little before going to bed, seeking the Lord again I was revived in read∣ing Psal. 40. especially v. 17. I am poor and needy yet the Lord thinketh upon me, &c. and next morning in reading Psal. 9. 10. 18. Thou Lord hast not forsaken them that seek thee; The needy shall not alway be forgotten, the ex∣pectation of the poor shall not perish for ever. I was thereby encouraged still to wait and hope. O Lord, I have sought thee, withhold not thou thy tender Mercies from me. How long wilt thou hide thy face from me! O when wilt thou come unto me! Make hast to help me O my God. I am poor and needy, O

let me not be forgotten for ever, let not my expectation perish for ever, and now O Lord, what is my expectation? It is even this, the giving in of mercy and grace through the Lord Jesus, pardoning mercy and renewing grace. It is the pouring out of thy Spirit, the taking away the heart of Stone, and giving an heart of flesh, it is an heart to know thee, to fear thee, to love thee, and obey thee, &c.

Dec. 6. Being in trouble and distress of Spirit, because the Lord hid his face, and withdrew himself from me, I went in the poverty of my Spirit to Trinity Lecture, and with some expectation to meet with God in his own Ordinance. The Lord was gracious to me, and spake Comfort to me from his Word. I see it is good to wait upon God, though he send the Rich empty away, yet he filleth the hungry with good things. My Soul was glad and rejoyced for a season. But going into the Country the same day, among friends and variety of worldly Affairs, I lost something of the savour and relish which the good Word of God left upon me. And I found palpably my Soul resting in those Comforts which I had received, and growing secure and careless; from whence the Lord gave me this Instruction, That I am a poor silly wretch, knowing neither how to want nor how to abound, apt to murmur and re∣pine in Straits, and to be lifted up and grow secure in Enlargements. O Lord! in every

Condition I need thy grace to teach me how to behave my self. O shew me thy way, and lead me therein for thy Name-sake. Also the Lord taught me hence, that I ought to be patient under his hand when he hideth his Face, and to resign up my will to his Will, inasmuch as I do not know what is good for my self. The Lord seeth I should be worse it may be, if I enjoyed more than I do, and therefore in wisdom and mercy he keeps me in a low Condition.

My confusion sometimes hath been so great, that I have been so unsetled, and at such a loss in my Soul that I knew not what to do; all former workings have been questioned and judged as nothing. In the hour of such temptation the Lord taught me, besides Prayer and searching into my Soul, to have recourse to former experiences. Psal. 77. 10, 11. and Psal. 85.

Octob. 11. In the morning I bewailed it before God, that I was still at a loss to know whether I loved him; and after Prayer I read 1 Joh. 2 ch. and I was made in a more spe∣cial manner to take notice of v. 5. Whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected. Me-thought I saw God An∣swering my Prayer, and telling me out of this word, that I loved him. In him verily, 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉, it is a sure sign of Love to God, we need not doubt of it, if we keep his Word. Now if I know my own heart I desire to do so.

if the Love of God be perfected in him that keeps his Word, then surely it is begun in him that desires and endeavours to keep his Word.

Jan. 25. The Lord helped me with Tears to bewall mine abominations, even my Ori∣ginal and actual sins, my formality, Earth∣liness, alienation from him, &c. therein he did remember and fulfil that gracious promise Ezek. 36. 31. I found Godly sorrow sweet, not only in the root and fountain thereof (it being a Covenant blessing) but in the very Actings of it.

Feb. 2. In the Evening upon my Bed the Lord did graciously melt my heart in the sight of sin under this Consideration, that it was against infinite Love. I was ashamed, con∣founded and abashed, because I had so long slighted, neglected, Rebelled against a God of Love. My Soul even trembled at it.

Jan. 15. 1655. Having been the day be∣fore with one under great Temptations, and hearing of another under a wounded Spirit, my heart was melted in Prayer, whilst I was praising God for his long patience in the days of my sinning, and his tenderness and gentle∣ness towards me in my Conversion.

Jan. 16. I found my heart drawn out to a recumbence on Jesus Christ. The Spirit saith Come. Rev. 22. 17. Christ saith, Come. Joh. 7. 37. And the Father saith, Come. Mat. 22. 4. And who am I, O Lord, that

I should gainsay such Invitations. Behold, O Lord, I come, and put my trust in thee.

Jan. 26. I Preached twice, and had very gracious assistance, much beyond expectation, in the week before I was much indisposed, and could not get my heart to a setled medi∣tation of what I was to speak. I was under a great sense of my impotency, and laboured in the fire, till Saturday Afternoon; when I cried to the Lord he was gracious to me, and Answered me. After my work was over I was much assaulted with Spiritual Pride. I saw plainly, the reason of Gods delaying his Assistance, and giving me such sense of my weakness, was to keep me humble. Every way O Lord! I see my own vileness, when thou withdrawest from me then my heart dieth, and my strength fails, and I am ready to be froward. When thou enlargest me, then I am ready to be puffed up. Oh pardon and purge away all my sin for thy Names sake.

Mar. 23. In Singing the 15th. Psalm I found Comfort, my Conscience bearing me witness that I laboured after those things, which are set down as Characters of a Citizen of the New Jerusalem.

Sept. 28. I had sweet Meditations upon my Bed, I found God in my morning Prayer also in private, and assistance in Preaching, but not such an influence of the Spirit in pub∣lick Prayer, as I have sometimes found. Yet I had begged of God, that he would give me

his presence in publick, as a token that he ac∣cepted of me and my work; but he withdrew. I feared hereupon, that I had tempted God, and sinned in begging new signs of his favour, when I had had such great experience of his goodness many times before. Lord, forgive the sin of thy Servant.

Nov. 23. Examining my self about a work of Grace, I had some Comfort from Ps. 40. 8. Delight in doing the will of God is an Argument of the Law written in the heart. Now I found that I had a delight especially in some duties, as visiting the Sick, comforting of distressed Consciences, &c.

I was somewhat terrified from that word in Job. ch. 42. 7. I was afraid least in my Preach∣ing I should sometimes speak those things of God that were not right, and soon after going to Prayer, I was in time of Prayer comforted from Joh. 16. 13. The Spirit shall guide you into all truth.

Dec. 7. I found the Lord very much An∣swering my Prayer in giving very gracious, and powerful Assistance both in Prayer and Preaching at Trinity Lecture on Sabbath day. I may say as Jaber. 1 Chron. 4. 10. who said, Oh that thou wouldest bless me indeed, and be with me! And God granted my request. The next morning there came a woman to me, and said she was troubled at the Sermon that she could scarce sleep all night; for she bad not gone so far as the Scribes and Pharisees,

and that which added to the mercy was, God kept me humble after this enlargement.

Mar. 31. 1657. I had a very evident Answer of Prayer. I was at a pinch for some money, I begged of God that I might be supplied, and that Afternoon one to whom I had lent a little money brought it me, which was enough for my present necessities, the Circumstances were very remarkable.

I sought the Lord also to be with the Parish in the choice of their Church-Wardens, and there were those two chosen, whom if I had had the Nomination, I should have chosen my self.

Apr. 21. I kept a day of Fast to the Lord. I found God graciously with me in Prayer, the chief thing that I propounded was to seek direction as to my Preaching on Week-days. Among other things I begged of God a sup∣ply of my wants, being in some straits for want of money. That very night one brought me 10 s. for Preaching a Funeral Sermon, which I expected not; and the next morning the Church-Wardens of St. Andrews Parish brought me 7 l. and upwards, whereby I was sufficiently supplied. I could not but take notice of an evident Answer of Prayer, and a fulfilling of that promise, Prov. 28. 27. He that giveth unto the poor shall not lack.

April. 24. Being desired to go to a poor Christian, I promised to go; there being only two Maids in the house, I considered whether

it might not prove some scandal to go; but considering also she was a Member of Christ, and therefore I ought to Administer to her Soul, I resolved to commit the taking care of my Name to the Lord, and to do my duty. I begged of him that he would secure me from reproach, and as I went an honest poor man met me, to whom I told whither I was going, and asked him to go along with me; he was willing, and did so. I looked upon him as sent by the Providence of God in Answer to my Prayer.

These were some of those observations and experiences which he recorded during his continuance at Cambridge. Upon his removal from thence he intermitted this practice for some years, but resumed it again.

Octob. 1662. God put it into my heart, as at other times so especially on Wednesdays (the day on which I was wont to Preach my Le∣cture) when I was not diverted by some un∣expected Providence, to lament after the Lord who had cast me out of my employment in his Vineyard, and to seek to him for a dis∣covery of the cause for which he contends with me, and that he would shew me for what sin or sins he hath sent this sad affliction, and that he would give me a sanctified use thereof, by purging out my sins and making me more holy, and that he would restore me again to some employment in his Vineyard, when and where it shall seem good in his sight.

Being sad and dejected because I had sinned now I was under the afflicting hand of God, I was very much revived by Isa. 57. 17, 18. I smote him—he went on in the way of his own heart, I have seen his ways and will heal him. Having afterward sinned again, and been over-powred by a corruption which had oft prevailed over me, I was caused to observe from that Scripture further, that it was not only a single Act of sin which was committed, but he went on in the way of his heart; and God saith, I have seen his ways and will heal him. It was a stay to my Faith. Here I observe what I have often found, viz. 1. Dejection is a fore-runner of Consolation. Seldom have I had trouble upon my Spirit, but if I have eyed and followed after God, he hath took it off by some word of promise. 2. The observing and pondering of every word and Circumstance in a promise is of great use, as it hath been to me. 3. God openeth his promises gradually sometimes hinting and discovering one thing, and then another in the promise.

Being foiled by sin I was raised to my for∣mer hope and affiance in God by Phil▪

Children of God till the coming of Christ.

Being another time foiled with the same corruption, and my heart sinking in a despon∣dent frame, I was much revived from Jam. 4. 5. 6. He giveth more grace. Where I saw that even our strongest sins, such as our cor∣rupt natures are most prone to, and are deeply rooted in our hearts and Spirits, are conque∣rable by Gods grace.

Being troubled that I had sinned against God under his Correcting hand, and having thereby lost my former Comfort which God had spoken to my Soul after my former back∣slidings, I sighed over the great Treachery and unstedfastness of my heart, and casting about in my thoughts where I should find a sutable word to fix on, God brought to my remem∣brance. Isa. 48. 8, 9. I knew that thou wouldest deal very Treacherously—for my Names sake will I defer my Anger. While I was musing and pondering hereon and had new hope put into me, the Lord let in further Comfort and encouragement from. vers. 10, 11. which is rendred by Piscat. Behold I will refine thee, and I will make thee a choice one in the furnace of affliction: for mine own sake, even for mine own sake will I do it. Which gave me abundant refreshment, and did marvellously strengthen my hope in God. This was given me in when I had set apart some time to humble my Soul.

Apr. 5. 1665. I set apart that day for

Fasting and Prayer on behalf of my Daughter Elianor, that had been so long sick, and in the Evening had my Faith revived from Isa. 44. 3▪ I will pour my Spirit upon thy seed.

Apr. 7. I began the day with discourse with some Friends, before I had been at my private Communion with God, I met with a gentle Rebuke from the Providence of God in my Family Affairs, and my heart was flat in Family duty, and straitned in private. I took this as an Item to begin with God, before I converse with men. In the Evening God came in graciously to me in my Family Exer∣cise.

Apr. 9. Lords day, I was much discom∣posed in my Spirit in the Morning, by reason of a foil sin had given me the Evening before. Satan would have boat me off from Preaching in my Family, but I performed my Morning exercise, and continued dejected till the Evening, and then in Family Prayer God graciously revived me with that promise. Hos. 11. 10. They shall walk after the Lord, in Connexion with vers. 7. my people are bent to backsliding, though they called them to the most high, none at all would exalt him. Where two things were a great relief to my Faith. 1. God promiseth they should walk after him, not∣withstanding their habitual proness to back∣slide from God. 2. Notwithstanding their refusing to exalt the Lord, though called to it. Yet within a little time I was again foiled

by my corruption, which made me see what a poor creature I was, it left of God to my self.

May. 8. At eleven of the Clock at night my daughter Elianor died after a long Sick∣ness. God gave me several opportunities of recommending her Soul to him in prayer, at some whereof my heart was much affected and my faith, and hope acted on God, for the eternal welfare of her Soul, which made her departure easie to me. My grounds were, Gen. 17. I will establish my Covenant between me and thee, and thy seed after thee for an everlasting Covenant, to be a God to thee, and thy seed after thee. I considered that this Co∣venant is to give life, Mal. 2. 5. And where∣as the thoughts of the Childs Original, and actual Sins, as frowardness, &c. might make me fearful of its estate. It was brought to my mind, that the Covenant is to give par∣don of sin, Heb. 8. 10, 12. And whereas faith and regeneration are necessary to Salva∣tion, I considered further that the Covenant is to give all things necessary, to Salvation, 2 Sam. 23. 5. this is all my Salvation. Be∣sides the Consideration of the Covenant, God gave me other encouragements, to hope in reference to my Child, as from Math. 19. 14. Suffer little Children to come unto me, and from observing how prevalent, faith and Prayer is with God for the remission of sins, and salvation of others as well as our own souls,

Math. 9. 2. Jesus seeing their faith, said Son be of good cheer, thy sins be forgiven thee. So 1 Joh. 5. 16. If a man see his Brother sin a sin which is not unto death, he shall ask of God, and he shall give him life. Now I Con∣sidered that though my child had sins incident to Childhood, yet it had not sinned the sin unto death, and therefore I concluded that if I asked of God he would give it life, Jam. 5. 15. The Prayer of faith shall save the sick, and if he hath commited sins they shall be for∣given him. Math. 15. 22, 28. The wo∣man of Canaan's faith and Prayer availed with Christ for the Casting the Devil out of her daughter: Now God helping me to act faith, for my child upon the account of his covenant, and stiring me by his Spirit often to pray for my Child, I was thereby encourag∣ed to hope for its Salvation.

When my Child died, the same day the small Pox began to appear upon my Sister, I knew not what breaches God might be about to make in my family; but as I was hearing the word, the Ministers, treating on Gods in∣tention to glorifie himself by all afflictions that he laid upon his people, from that Scrip∣ture, Isa. 5. 15, 16. this word Satisfied me, that whatever judgments, God should bring upon me or my family, he would exalt and glorifie his own Name by them; hereup∣on I submitted and resigned up my self to God, to do with me and mine what he pleased.

Yet I was then under the sense of sin, which weakned my faith and made me fearful, I should not bear up chearfully if I should be visited, while under the sense of guilt. But I was much encouraged in meditation from Mic. 7. 8, 9. When I sit in darkness the Lord will be a light unto me. This faith they held, when their affliction was attended with the sense of sin, for it followeth. I will bear the indignation of the Lord, because I have sinned a∣gainst him. I was also much encouraged by viewing the promises that I had collected to comfort my self with, when I was in danger of contagious diseases. Especially those two▪ viz, Ps. 41. 12. As for me, thou settest me before thy face for ever, and this was when under an evil disease, v. 8, which was the fruit of his sin. ver. 4. and Ps. 38. 5, 7. My wounds stink and are corrupt—my loyns are filled with a loathsome disease, &c. though in this visitation he was afflicted with the sense of sin, and of Gods displeasure, v. 1, 2, 3, 4▪ and was deprived of the Comfortable Society of his relations, and friends, v. 11. yet he kept up his hope in God, v. 15. In a little time af∣ter I had the sense of guilt taken off, while I was studying my Sermon, to remove the fears of Death.

Jun. 12. As I was reading, Act. 6. in my Evening course by my self, I observed by comparing▪ ver. 4. 7. that upon the Apostles giving themselves Continually to prayer, and

to the ministry of the word, the number of the disciples, encreased greatly in Jerusalem, and a great company of the Priests were obedi∣ent to the faith. I was instructed and affected with it, and saw it was necessary, I should pray much as well as Preach much, if I would convert many Souls, and that upon giving my self to prayer, and to the ministry of the word, I was in the most likely way, to con∣vert many Souls to Christ. The Priests were the chiefest opposers of the Gospel. Act. 4. 1, 2. the chiefest persecuters of Christ, Math. 16. 21. and 20, 18. the most active in putting Christ to death, Mar. 15. 10, 11. Luk. 19. 47. the multitude that came to apprehend Christ, were sent by the Priests, Joh. 18. 3. the false witnesses were suborned by the Priests Math 26. 59. yet by the power of prayer, and the word these Priests were brought in, by great numbers to the faith of Christ, and the obedience of the Gosple.

Jun. 25. about three of the Clock in the morning being Lords day my Wife was de∣livered of a Daughter, and that morning the Lord sent a very plentiful rain. The Tuesday before, we kept a day of humiliation for my Wifes safe delivery, and to seek the Lord for rain, and the Lord gave a gracious answer to the prayers of that day, both at one time.

Jul. 31. I saw the plague of my heart break∣ing out. I argued against my corruption, yet it overcame me, and led me captive, it

wounded me that I should still sin against God, even while under his Correcting hand. My faith was revived by that Scripture, Isa. 57. 17, 18. I Smote him, he went on frowardly in the way of his own heart, I have seen his ways, and will heal him. I was much en∣couraged from that word, I will heal him, which imports the Subduing, as well as the pardoning of sin.

Aug. 2. I was encouraged to write some∣thing that might be useful for my generation, from, Jer. 36. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Two things es∣pecially from that Scripture, did put me for∣ward to this. 1. writing of the word of God, is a means to Convert souls, and to lead them to repentance. 2. this Command for writing was given when Jeremiah was shut up, and could not preach as usually, and such was my case, viz, I was debarred from publick preach∣ing, hereupon I apprehended; God called me to write.

Sept. 6. Being fast day, As I came from Church I received a letter from, Mr. J. which acquainted me that my Son Samuel was very ill. that day I spent somewhat un∣profitably, I was not affected as I ought with publick judgments, and the misery of others, and therefore it was just with God to bring af∣fliction into my family, the next day my Wife and, I went over to see our Child, and after we had been with it about five or six hours it died very suddenly. I was troubled that I

did not pray with it before it died, which was occasioned by being in anothers family, and my not apprehending death to be near.

This stroak coming soon after my removal from Colchester, I communed with my heart, whether I had sinned in removing from that place, and my conscience did not at that time charge me with sin, in removing my habitati∣on: I was Comforted in calling to mind Gods dealing with Jacob, who met with many af∣flictions in those removes, which he made at the command of God, He was pursued by his Uncle, put into great fear by his Brother, loseth Deborah his Mothers nurse, and Ra∣chel his beloved Wife, His Sons Reuben, Simeon and Levi, fell into foul sins, &c. Hence I saw that God trieth his dear Servants with sudden and sore afflictions in those places to which they have removed at the call of God.

Sept. 24. I enjoyed the opportunity of the Lords Supper, I found God gracious to me in preparation: In the morning when I awaked, God brought to my remembrance, Jer. 2. 32. Can a maid forget her Ornaments, or a Bride her attire? I considered I was to meet and Sup with my Bridegroom the Lord Jesus, and then considered what Ornaments and attire would best please him, that I might put them on, and these were presented to my thoughts, some as I lay in bed, and some afterwards, as lovely and desirable in the sight of Christ which I determined to put on 1st, A meek

and quiet Spirit, 1 Pet. 3. 4. 2ly, Faith, Cant. 4. 9. Thou hash ravished my heart my Sister, my spouse, with one of thine Eyes Faith hath the office of an Eye in the Soul Joh. 6. 40. Every one that seeth and believeth Looking unto Jesus, Heb 12. 2. 3ly Love, Cant. 4. 10. How fair is thy Love, my Sister, &c. 4ly Humility, Math. 11. 29. Learn of me for I am lowly in heart. 5ly, Self∣denial and forsaking of every thing, that cometh in Competition with Christ. Ps. 45 10, 11. Hearken O Daughter, and consider—forget thine own people, and thy Fathers House; So shall the King greatly desire thy beauty. 6ly, An obediential frame of heart, Math. 10. 20, 21. All these have I observed from my youth: Jesus beholding him Loved him. 7ly, An heart resolved to hold and main∣tain frequent converse and communion with him. Cant. 2. 14▪ Let me see thy countenance, let me hear thy voice, for sweet is thy voice, and thy Countenance is Comely. 8ly, Up∣rightness, Prov. 11. 20. 9ly, An holy fear of God and hope in his mercy. Ps. 147. 11. 10ly, fruitfulness. Cant. 4. 16—5. 1.

But though God graciously assisted me in preparation, yet in the time of receiving, my heart was flat and dead. As soon as the Sacra∣ment was ended, I retired to my Chamber to to pray, and as I was praying, that Scripture was brought to my remembrance, Rom. 3. 3,

4. shall their unbelief make the Faith of God of none effect? God forbid. I argued thence that the sins of my holy▪things, my deadness and want of holy and due affections, in time of re∣ceiving should not make void what God had promised, in and by this ordinance, but that the Cup was to me the Communion of the blood of Christ, and the New Testament in his blood; and the Bred the Communion of the body of Christ▪ This did strengthen my faith, to depend upon God for the benefits signified, and sealed by that Ordinance, not∣withstanding the indisposition of my heart in the time of receiving▪

Sept. 29. As I was musing on that rich pro∣mise made to Abraham, Gen. 15. 1. Fear not Abraham, I am thy shield and thy exceeding great reward. Which is sufficient to bear up the Soul under the fear and danger of any Evil, and against the loss and want of any good things▪ I considered what warrant I had to apply that promise, and presently that Scripture was hinted to me, Gal. 3. 9. They which be of faith are blessed with faithful Abra∣ham. I was strengthened, and Comforted by it.

Twice in this weak I observed that Setting upon worldly business, (which called hastily upon me) before I had been at closet prayer, and performed my usual meditations on the Covenant and promises of God, my heart grew out of frame, and unsavory, and I was Successless on both days.

Oct. 1. Sabbath day, At my Entrance on my morning meditation on Gods Covenant, I had a great combate in my Spirit, about my laying claim to God as my God, having been lately foiled by my sins, but God helped me, and shewed me out of his word that, I might and ought to keep my hold of God as my God, Not∣withstanding my often backslidings from him, Jer. 3. 1, 5, 7, 8. yet v. 19. saith God, Thou shalt call me, my Father Hos. 2. 5. with 16.

The same evening considering how often and greatly I had sinned, and yet had been for∣given, I pondered on that Scripture. Luke 7, 47. and saw that I had cause to love the Lord much because I had much forgiven, and Considering how I should shew my Love to God, and that much, these Scriptures were hinted to me, Ps. 40. 16. Let such as love thy name say Continu∣ally, let the Lord be Magnified, Ps. 97. 10. Ye that Love the Lord hate evil. Joh. 14. 10. If ye Love me keep my Commandments, Joh. 21. 15. Simon lovest thou me? feed my sheep, feed my Lambs, Lord help me thus to shew much love to thee.

Oct. 8. Having been overtaken with the sin which easily besets me, and hath often foil∣ed me, My Spirit fell, and my faith flagg'd, and I could not look upon God with any bold∣ness, was indisposed to prayer. Yet in time of prayer God magnified his free grace to me, and revived my Souls with that word, 1 Joh. 2. 1, 2. If any man sin we have an Advocate &c. After I had ended my Supplications I

pondered on that Scripture, and was comfort∣ed against the sense of my sin, by the Advo∣cateship of Jesus Christ, who pleadeth his propitiatory Sacrifice, as a Satisfaction to his Fathers justice for the sins of believers, as oft as they fall into them, and querying with my self whether he would be an Advocate to me to plead for me: I was satisfied from that word, Joh. 6. 37. him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. I was also further encouraged from, Heb. 7. 25. I considered that the In∣tercession of Christ, answered all charges and accusations that could be brought against those for whom he interceded, Rom. 8. 33. 34. and that the Intercession of Christ kept us ••o firmly in the love of God, that nothing could be able to separate us from it, Rom. 8. 34. 35, 38, 39. I considered further that the persons for whom he interceded were such as came to God by him, and that he interceded for them at all times, when they are fallen as well as when they stand, when they are dead, as well as when in a lively frame, for He ever liveth to make intercession. After these me∣ditations▪ my Spirit revived and notwith∣standing I was before bowed down under the sense of guilt, I went with boldness to God, leaning upon the merits and Intercession of Jesus Christ.

Oct. 13. My Spirit being bowed down with the sense of guilt, because I was foiled by a Sin against which I had prayed many years,

I was revived in reading in my course 2 Cor. 12. 7, 8, 9. Whence I observed, 1st. God se∣eth it needful for some of his Servants, to meet with buffeting. 2ly. When God lets loose any corruption, a thorn in the flesh, or a temptation, a messenger of Satan to buffet us, It is to keep us humble, and from being ex∣alted. 3ly. God suffers his faithful Servants some∣times to pray long against corruption or temptation, and yet cannot get it removed. 4ly. Though my strength was not sufficient to resist and overcome my sins, yet Gods grace was sufficient: Paul was insufficient to any good of himself as I am 2 Cor. 3. 5. He had a body of sin and death as well as I, Rom. 7. 23. 24. and Sa∣tan assaulted him here as well as me, and there∣fore if Gods grace was sufficient for Paul, why not for me also? what God spake to Paul, I applied as spoken to me, according to, Math. 22. 31, 32. Christ saith, what was spoken by God to Moses was spoken to them, though many hundered years after Moses.

Dec. 10. I had about a month before made, though not a formal explicit vow, yet a kind of mental implicit vow, which I broke, and being under the sense of guilt, was revived by read∣ing a passage concerning David in Mr. Harris his works. p. 490.

Who would ever have thought, that so many afflictions as David had Suffered, so many mercies as he had received, so many vows as he had made, so many pieces of Holy

Scripture as he had proved, &c. should not have made him an whole man? Who would have dreamed that after all this so many dregs of adultery, of treachery, of murder, should have been left remaining in him, Yet when David remitted his watch over his own heart, how foully did he fall?

I was also much comforted against the sense of my sin from, Isa. 54. 9. This is as the wa∣ters of Noah unto me; for as I have sworn that the waters of Noah should no more go over the earth, So have I sworn that I would not be wroth with thee, nor rebuke thee. I looked upon my self as entitled to this promise by ver∣tue of what is said v. 17. This is the heritage of the Servants of the Lord. I considered fur∣ther that the Covenant which God made with Noah, and was confirmed with an Oath, was made with a Non obstante multiplici peccato hominis, with a promise it should stand valid notwithstanding the imaginations of the heart of man are evil from his youth, Gen. 8. 21. I considered further that notwithstanding the Covenant with Noah, there might be immoderate rains which might prove a great affliction, though there should not be a Uni∣versal deluge. So notwithstanding this Oath of God, and his Covenant with me I might meet with temporary afflictions, but I should by vertue of the Covenant be delivered from eternal wrath. Blessed be God, This Scrip∣ture did much revive and comfort my Soul.

Notwithstanding all this goodness of God I found my heart still manifesting its in-bred corruption, and I was foiled again by my sin, which did much cast me down, and being to draw nigh to God at the Lords Table, I was much discouraged; but before the Sabbath came I was in Prayer revived with Isa. 53. 5, 6. and in conference by Mat. 11. 28. I found I was in a labouring condition, and such Christ invited, and also from Psal. 65. 3, 4. David when he found iniquity pre∣vailing, did yet conclude that upon his ap∣proaching to God in his Ordinances, he should be satisfied.

In reading Luke 8. 27. 30. I was encou∣raged to hope that the Lord Jesus would dis∣posses, and cast out my sins out of my Soul, though they were many and had possessed me a long time. For it is as easie for Christ to cast a sin, as to cast a Devil out.

Mar. 25. 1666. Being Lords day, and the first day the Oxford Act for removing of Non-Conformists from the places where they had been Ministers, and from Corporations, took place. In the morning as I lay in my Bed, pondering on this Providence, these Scriptures came to mind. Heb. 13. 14. Here have we no continuing City, but we seek one to come. Whence I was instructed that the mind of God in this unsetling Providence as to my abode here, was to stir me up to seek more industriously after the Kingdom of

Heaven. Jer. 48. 11. Moab hath been a ease, and he hath setled on his lees, and hath not been emptied from vessel to vessel, neither hath gone into Captivity, therefore his tast re∣mained in him, and his scent is not changed. I learned hence that the design of God in this Providence was to take me off from Carnal ease and security, and setling upon the lees of any sinful course, and to purge away that tang, and scent of sin which yet remaineth in me. Psal. 55. 19. Because they have no changes therefore they fear not God. Whence I saw that this change was to promote a greater awe, and dread of God upon my Soul. The Lord great that this Providence may have these effects upon me.

Apr. 8. The Lord warned me to take heed how I presumed to sin against him upon the account of any mercies and favours he had bestowed upon me, or upon the account of any gifts or graces given me from 2 Pet. 2. 4. If God spared not the Angels that sinned, but cast them down to hell—The Angels had been partakers of great goodness, God had done great things for them, placed them in Heaven, yet when they sinned he did not spare them, but cast them down to Hell. O my Soul, be not high minded, do not pre∣sume to sin against God, but fear to offend him.

Apr. 15. Corruption having prevailed I was indisposed to pray, and could not medi∣tate.

After I had been praying a second time though with much flatness and distraction, God graciously revived my Soul with Rom. 7. 23. 25. and 8. 1.

Apr. 21. In the like case God revived me with Isa. 43. 24, 25.

May. 2. In the like case I was encouraged from 1 Sam. 12. 20. 22. and from Jer. 31. 37.

Soon after I renewed my Covenant with God; yet quickly found my Treacherous heart departing from God, and revolting and relapsing to sin. Yet still God Comforted me with his Word. Jer. 31. 31, 32, 33, 34. and Rom. 14. 4. He shall be holden up, for God is able to make him stand. It is spoken of him that is weak in the Faith. v. 1. and encou∣raged me to hope for the acceptation of my Person and Services from Isa. 56. 6, 7.

Nov. 23. Being a day of private humi∣liation for my unprofitableness under my af∣flictions, sighing under my incorrigibleness, God minded me of Jer. 31. 18. 20. which much refreshed me and strengthened my Faith. Bles∣sed be God.

Jan. 1. Having some days before felt much of the sinfulness, and filthiness of my own heart, sin not only arising but leading me Captive, I was afraid that because of my sinfulness, God being most holy would cast me out of his favour. But the Lord instructed me from Psal. 89. 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35. that his holiness should not deter me from ex∣pecting

the accomplishment of his promises, but rather encourage me to hope. For God hath sworn by his Holiness, that he would not take away his Loving-kindness, nor break his Covenant, &c. notwithstanding he found sin.

Jan. 7. It was a sutable word to my state, and that which afforded me some support, which I met with in my course of private reading. Ps. 19. 13. Keep back thy servant from presumptuous sins, let them not have do∣minion over me. Where I considered. 1. That David found in his heart a proness to presumptuous sins, which made him cry out, Keep back thy servant, &c. 2. He was not without fear or danger, lest presumptuous sins should get the dominion over him, for he Prays, Let them not have dominion. 3. When he found it thus with himself, he calls himself Gods Servant. Keep back thy servant—This word coming when my heart had been upon the borders of a presumptuous sin, did much affect me.

Febr. 6. Being a day of Humiliation, I was much indisposed to the duties of the day, I found my heart unfit to Pray in private, and to perform Family exercise. The sense of guilt had clouded and bowed down my Soul. In the Evening God revived my Soul with Isa. 64. 6, 7, 8. They complained they were all as an unclean thing, their righteous∣ness as filthy rags, there was a flagging of the

Spirit of prayer, and this in a time of great Judgments, as v. 10, 11. Yet they say, But now thou O Lord art our Father. This suited my condition, and encouraged me to believe my relation to God, and his to me as my Fa∣ther, though I found my self under the fore∣said Distempers.

I was also supported against my sins with 1 Joh. 2. 24. Let that abide in you which you have heard from the beginning; if that which you have heard from the beginning shall remain in you, ye shall continue in the Father and the Son. By which I was encouraged to hold fast what Instructions, Comforts and Supports I had formerly received from God. That which ye have heard, viz. from the teachings of the Spirit. Joh. 6. 45. from the beginning, viz. from the time they began to believe in Christ, Heb. 3. 14.

Nov. 28. 1669. Being Saturday, I was visit∣ed with a Feaver. When I was under the Visita∣tion I looked over my Evidences for Heaven, & had comfortable hopes of my Salvation from several promises, whereby the fear of Death was removed. My Life was in hazard, many Prayers were put up for me: God directed to the timely use of proper means, and gave his blessing, and restored me to my work on the fourth Lords day, as a return to Prayers. In my sickness before the danger was probably past, in the night season I had very clear and awful appre∣hensions of the Majesty of God, as though I

had heard God speaking to me out of Isa. 57. 15. I who am the high and lofty one that inhabit Eternity, &c. and then methought it was said to me, Surgite Ministri & servi, praedicate Evangelium ad Conversionem pec∣catorum. Arise ye Ministers and Servants of God, and Preach the Gospel for the Conver∣sion of sinners. And afterwards it was said to me, You shall not die, but live and declare the works of the Lord. Fear thou not, thou hast born witness to my Name in this place; thou shalt bear witness also to my Name, where I shall call thee. To which my Soul bowed down, and I replied, Lord, I am willing to follow thee, if thou shalt satisfie me that thou callest me. I could not certainly tell, whe∣ther I was awake or sleeping, or slumbring; but the matter being so affecting, coherent, and coming with some power, I laid it up in my heart, not knowing but it might be use∣ful to me.

Jan. 30. 1671. My Treatise of Family Instruction being finished and Published, I resolved after several times seeking God, and Consulting with my own Soul, to set upon composing a Treatise of glorifying God. The grounds or reasons inducing me hereunto were,

1. The Command given to all persons in all Nations to declare the glory of God, 1 Chron. 16. 23, 24. I saw here I might law∣fully, yea it was my duty, to do what I could

to set forth the glory of God: And seeing I was taken off from my publick Preaching, I might do it more beneficially by Writing and Printing.

2. My Spirit hath been for several years put upon, and stirred up to write on this Sub∣ject. I made a little beginning in the year 1664. but laid it aside, and in times of sick∣ness I have found a lothness to die till that work were done, and have met with many cross Providences as if sent with a tacit reproof for neglecting this work. Now the stirring up the Spirit to a good work is of God, and part of Gods call to the work. Exod. 36. 2. Ezr. 1. 5. Hagg. 1. 14.

3. I was under many Engagements to glorifie God, as 1st. The many and great mercies I have received for my Soul, by the Teachings and Consolations of his Spirit, and many outward mercies above my other Re∣lations, which are engagements to glorifie God. Ps. 86. 12, 13. 2ly, The eminent deliverances I have had from sickness, the Pestilence and other troubles. Psal. 50. 15. 3ly, The wonderful preservation I have had from mine Enemies, notwithstanding all the hazards I have run of falling into their hands, by Preaching the Gospel at home and abroad, which should engage me to extol and glorifie God. Psal. 30. 1.

4. I did hope for benefit to my own Soul, both by being further enlightened into the

knowledge, and excited to the practice of glorifying God, while I was studying to in∣struct and excite others thereto.

July 17. 1672. God having opened a door for the free exercise of my Ministry by his Majesties most Gracious Declaration, I was desired both at Ipswich and Colchester to Mi∣nister to them. I had discouragements as from the uncertainty of the times, not know∣ing whether this liberty would continue, or a time of trouble and persecution arise, the differences and animosities that are among Pro∣fessors, and the enmity that is on the part of the Adversaries. I considered of it and had encouragement from the Word thereto, as 1 Pet. 5. 2. 4. with vers. 7. as also from Josh. 1. 9. Joshua had difficult work before him, potent Enemies that dwelt in fenced Cities, the people with whom he had to do, had so exasperated Moses his Spirit by their frequent murmurings, that once he cried out to God to be killed out of hand, that he might not see his own wretchedness, Numb. 11. 15. another time he spake so unadvisedly with his lips that he angred God, and was shut out of Canaan. Joshua might well fear when he was to enter on this work. Therefore God speaks four times to him to encourage him. Be strong; be of good courage, &c. and gives him two Arguments to encourage him. 1st. His Call, Have not I Commanded thee? 2ly. A pro∣mise of his Presence, as his God. Whence

I Obs. 1. God will be with his people in all places whithersoever they go. 2. The pro∣mise of Gods presence may take off all fears, arising either from the temper of the people with whom we shall have to do, or the diffi∣culty of our work, or strength of Adversa∣ries.

Jan. 1. 1673. I awaked about four of the Clock in the morning, and had many sweet meditations in my Bed for the space of about two hours. I then resolved with my self to engage my heart afresh, and to renew my Co∣venant with the Lord the beginning of this New year, to be the Lords Servant, to serve the Lord and his Son Jesus Christ all the re∣mainder of the days I have to live in this world, in such service as he should see meet to employ me.

The encouragements and inducements that were brought to my mind, and drew out my heart willingly and cheerfully to give up my self to the Lord, to serve him and his Son Jesus Christ were these,

1. His promise of affording his Presence, and Assistance to such as are his Servants, and to be their God. Isa. 41. 8, 9, 10.

2. The great and precious promises made to his Servants. Isa. 54. per totum. Which concludeth thus v. 17. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord.

3. We glorifie God when we serve him. Isa. 49. 3. Thou art my Servant O Israel in whom I will be glorified.

4. God hath done great things for me, both for my outward and inward man, and the only thing that he requires of me is to serve him in truth and sincerity. 1 Sam. 12. 24.

5. All Christs Servants shall assuredly be with him where he is, and shall be honoured of the Father. Joh. 12. 26. and shall enter into the joy of their Lord. Mat. 25. 21.

May 19. 1676. Reading Levit. 22. 3. Whosoever of the Priests in their generations, went unto the holy things, which the Children of Israel did hallow unto the Lord, having his uncleanness upon him, that Soul should be cut off from the presence of the Lord, And the ensuing Sabbath being Sacrament day, I considered with my self, 1st. That greater Reverence is due to the Lords Supper, than to the holy things under the Law. 2ly. Moral unclean∣ness is greater than Ceremonial. 3ly. There∣fore I considered how I might go to this Or∣dinance, and Administer it to others without having my uncleanness upon me, that is, how I might be purged from my uncleanness. To that end I determined,

1. Humbly to acknowledge, confess, and bewail the uncleanness of my heart, lips, and life before the Lord. Isa. 6. 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. When the Prophet bemoaned his uncleanness, the Lord purged it away, and sent him to do his Office.

2. To go to the fountain set open for sin and for uncleanness. Zech. 13. 1. that is, to

act my faith on the blood of Christ which cleanseth from all sin. 1 Joh. 1. 7.

3. To rest upon God by faith for fulfilling his Covenant, wherein he hath promised to cleanse me from all my filthiness, and to save me from all my uncleanness, Ezek. 36. 25, 29. Act. 15. 9.

4. To plead earnestly with God to take a∣way all iniquities, Hos. 14. 2. and to create in me a clean heart, Ps. 51. 10. and to succeed my prayers with endeavours to put away evil and uncleanness out of my heart and life, Isa. 1. 16. 18. 2 Cor. 7. 1.

These are many of those judicious obser∣vations, which this holy person made, and those spiritual experiences he found and recorded for his own use; that he might always have at hand before him the manner and method of Gods dealing with his Soul, the workings of Cor∣ruption and grace, his lapses and recoveries, his combates and victories over world, sin and Satan, his perseverance and progress in holi∣ness, the secret intercourse between God and his soul, the withdrawings and Returns of the Holy Spirit, the faithfulness of Gods Covenant the truth of his word sensibly felt in his heart, food for his faith, encouragement to walk with God, with experimental instruction, how to comfort troubled Consciences. (In which part of the ministry he had a peculiar excellency be∣yond most part of his Brethren. for partly by his diligent searching of the Holy Scripture, part∣ly

by observing and recording the method of the Holy Ghost towards himself, and partly by discoursing with troubled Consciences, (where∣in as he was much exercised, so he took much delight) he was so acquainted with the various cases of Conscience, and so well understood both Case and cure, that it may be truly said of him, The Lord God had given him the tongue of the learned, that he might know how to speak a word in season to the weary. On which ac∣count he might be sirnamed Barnabas a Son of Consolation. It was his usual manner in preach∣ing to foresee and raise such objections as trou∣bled Souls are prone to make against themselves, and to solve them with much clearness and sa∣tisfaction. And many applications of such Souls were made to to him in private as to a Skillful, Experienced, Spiritual Physitian, whose ad∣vice God succeeded with his blessing to the en∣couragement of the faith and hope of many doubting Christians that walked in darkness.) which are here published not only as Instances and demonstrations of that Spirit of Light and grace, that power of Godliness which possessed and governed his heart and life, and fitted him to be such a useful instrument for the Service of Christ and his Church, on which account his memory is worthily honourable, and precious to all good men: But especially for the Instructi∣on, direction, relief, support, and encourage∣ment of others who are following him, though at a great distance, in that narrow way which

leadeth to that life to which he is arrived.

They who labour and are heavy laden, who are bowed down under the power and weight of their sin, wrestling with Corruption and tempta∣tion, exercised with darkness and doubtings, with fears and faintings; They who are called to difficult service which require much labour and diligence and self-denial, and may expose them to the hazard and danger of this evil world, may hence take Counsel and encouragement while they read the sense, and workings of their own hearts in the experiences, the method and practicablenesse of their duty in the example of this Eminent Saint.

We have hitherto seen somethings of his Conscience of Sin and duty, his industry and zeal for the Service and glory of God, his com∣bates with the flesh and Satan, his Love to Christ and his Church, his Spirituality in Religion, His longings and breathings after God, His re∣membring God upon his bed, and meditating on him in the night watches, his wise improve∣ment of the Holy Scriptures, his due fulfilling of all Relations, his Holy manner of Living to God: From whence we may rationally con∣clude that surely he gave this diligence unto the full assurance of hope; that he tasted the Consolation of God, and received the earnest of Glory; that he walked upon the top of Pis∣gah in the light of Gods countenance, and in the sight of the Heavenly Canaan. Which priviledge indeed the God of peace and comfort

did not deny him. He was a man as of much grace, so of much peace; an instance of that word, Ps. 119. 165. Great peace have they that love thy Law. He received the spi∣rit which is of God, and knew the things that were freely given to him of God and rejoyced therein, 1 Cor. 2. 12.

As to his Conversion (which to some that have lived long in ignorance, security, sensuality, prophaness, and forgetfulness of God, is very Sensible) He being from tender years restrain∣ed and well inclined, It was not so remarkable to him. The most discernible part thereof was when he was a young Scollar in Cambridge. Nor did he then experience very notable work∣ings of the Spirit of bondage. Which occasi∣oned some trouble to his mind, and he feared his humiliation was not deep enough; but he received full satisfaction from a passage in a sermon which he heard preached by that Wor∣thy and Excellent Servant of Jesus Christ Mr. Richard Vines, then Master of Pembrooke Hall.

He hath sometimes said to his Friend that he was not much acquainted with those ravishing joys which some have felt, but yet had that comfort and joy in the Holy Ghost, which gave him satisfaction.

His method and manner was to derive his as∣surance and comfort from the written word. Of the truth whereof he would say he had such a full persuasion, as being the sure word of God, that he did more firmly believe it, than if an

Angel should speak to him from Heaven, ac∣cording to, 2 Pet. 1. 17, 18, 19, 20, 21. He could not satisfie himself with the expectation, or apprehension of the immediate, sole testimony of the Spirit, without the word. But would compare himself with the word, frequently practising the duty of self examination, Search∣ing for those graces, dispositions and operati∣ons in his heart, which are promised in the word, and to which the promises are made. Which the Spirit of God enlightned him to discern, and enabled him in a way of argumentation to infer thence his interest in Christ, and the Co∣venant of God for his satisfaction and Spiritual Consolation. And the Assurance which he at∣tained in this method, and by these means he thus Recordeth.

His Evidences.

1. Evidences of true and Saving Faith.

After my recovery from a Sickness, I set my self to examin and prove my faith, to see if it were true and saving: Because pardon of sin, freedom from Condemnation eternal life with other great blessings, are promised to Beleevers: And much of our comfort in Sick∣ness, and health, in life, and death depend∣eth

on the knowledge and proof of our faith; and that I did believe in Christ with a true and Saving faith, I was satisfied thus:

1. From those expressions of Scripture wherein the nature and essential acts of faith are set forth, as 1. Coming to Christ, Joh. 6. 35. He that cometh—he that believeth on me. Coming is believing. My Conscience bears me Witness that I am coming to Christ, for Christ himself and all his benefits, I sind my Soul drawn to Christ, and upon all occasions looking and going to him. 2. Receiving, Joh. 1. 12. As many as receiv∣ed him—even as many as believed on his Name. Receiving is believing. Now through grace I find my heart willingly receiving, and thankfully accepting Jesus Christ as God offers him in the Gospel, even an whole Christ, Christ in all his offices to be to me, Prophet, Priest, and King. 3, Trusting, Eph. 1. 13. In whom ye trusted—ye beleived. Trust∣ing is believing. This also I find, that God hath given me an heart to rely on Christ, for Righteousness, grace, and life.

2, From the ground of my faith, which is the word of God. It is through my know∣ledge and acquaintance with the word that I have been brought to believe in Christ, and through Christ in the Father that sent him. And I read, such as believe through the word are true believers, for whom Christ maketh intercession Joh. 17. 20. and who have

everlasting life, and shall not come into con∣demnation, Joh. 5. 24.

3, From this property and effect of faith, viz. Prizing Christ, 1 Pet. 2. 7. Unto you that believe Christ 'tis precious. The Apostle speaks of the faith of Gods elect, ch. 1. 2. and of saving faith, ch. 1. 9. Now I find Christ is precious to me, so precious to my Soul, that I value and prefer him above the whole world. I account his blood preci∣ous, which cleanseth me from all sin. The pro∣mises exceeding great and precious which in him are yea and Amen. Christ is so precious to me that I am willing to suffer for him. Phil. 1. 29. yea I choose a suffering condition for Christ, before the honours, Riches, and plea∣sures of the world, when they cannot be en∣joyed without sinning against Him. Heb. 11. 24, 25, 26. I am willing to take up the Cross, and forsake all things for him.

Evidences that I was one of Gods Servants.

Sept. 30. 1666. I considered with my self what evidence I had that I was one of Gods Servants, and was satisfied from these Scrip∣tures, Rom. 6. 16. Know ye not that to whom ye yield your selves Servants to obey, his Ser∣vants ye are to whom ye obey, whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto Righteousness. I find God hath given me an heart to yield my

self to Him. Nehem. 1. 11. O Lord I beseech thee, Let now thine ears be attentive to the prayer of thy Servant, and to the prayer of thy Servants that desire to fear thy Name. Here I saw that such as desire to fear God, are ac∣counted Gods servants. Which through grace I do.

Some doubtings arose in my heart, whe∣ther I was one of Gods Servants, because it is said, Joh. 8. 34. Verily, Verily I say unto you, that whosoever Committeth sin is the Ser∣vant of sin.

For removing this doubt I considered,

1. That the meaning of this Scripture is not that no man that hath sin in his heart, or doth sin in his life can be Gods Servant, but is a Ser∣vant of sin, for then God should have no Ser∣vants upon the face of the Earth, Eccl. 7. 20. There is not a just man upon Earth that doth good and sinneth not, Joh. 1. 8. If we say that we have no sin we deceive our selves and the truth is not in us.

2. It is said that the Servants of Sin are free from righteousness, Rom. 6. 20. Now through mercy I follow after righteousness, and find something of it, whence I concluded, I was not the servant of Sin.

3. I saw that David held this conclusion that he was one of Gods Servants though he

was compassed about with infirmities, yea, even at such time as he was under a sense of his sinful infirmities. Ps. 116. 11, 16. O Lord truly I am thy Servant, I am thy Servant, yet he had said in his haste (unbelievingly) All men are liars, David after he had com∣mitted the great sin of Numbering the people, against the Counsel and Advice of his friends, Confessed that he had sinned greatly and done very foolishly, yet calleth himself a Servant of the Lord, 2 Sam. 24. 10.

4. As I was Considering this thing the Lord brought to my remembrance, Rom. 7. ult. With my mind I my self serve the Law of God, but with my flesh the Law of sin. This Scrip∣ture was a great stay and satisfaction to me, and took off that which was my chief fear. There is no doubt but Paul was the Servant of Christ, yet he sayeth, I my self with the flesh serve the Law of Sin.

Evidences of the pardon of my sin.

Aug. 12. 1666. being under the sense of ma∣ny sins, I considered with my self what grounds and evidences I had for the pardon of my sins. And was satisfied from these Scriptures:

Acts. 10. 43. To him give all the prophets Witness that through his name, whosoever be∣lieveth in him shall receive remission of sins. I found that through grace I did believe in

Christ, 1 Joh. 1. 9. If we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. I saw here that Gods justice and faithfulness, stand engag∣ed to forgive their Sins, who make confession of them, which God had given me an heart to do.

Isa. 1. 16, 17, 18, 19. These persons to whom this promise was made, had sinned a∣gainst great mercies. ver. 2. and great judg∣ments, v. 5. and other circumstances did ag∣gravate their sins, yet God promiseth to for∣give their Scarlet, and Crimson-sins, if they were willing to repent and obey the Lord. If ye be willing and obedient. And through grace I found I was willing to obey Gods voice, to cease to do evil, and to learn to do well.

Hebr. 8. 10. 12. The promise of re∣mission of sins is part of the new Covenant, and I find that God hath made this Covenant with me. from Isa. 55. 3. where the condi∣tion of the Covenant is coming unto Christ, to which God hath enabled me.

Dec. 30. Having left the prevalency of sin, and found sin not only Warring against but leading me Captive, which made me question my pardon, I was enabled to rest up∣on God for forgiveness of my sin from,

Ps. 65. 3. Iniquities prevail against me, As for our transgressions thou shalt purge them away. By purging is meant. 1. pardon∣ing, Heb. 1. 3. Ps. 51. 7. 2. Subdu∣ing

and Destroying sin, Isa. 27. 9. 2 Tim. 2. 21. So that David when he felt sin prevail∣ing and not only one sin but several—Ini∣quities, in the plural number, prevail, did yet rest upon God both for the pardon and the Subduing of his sins, and what David did I may and ought to do.

Rom. 7. 23, 24, 25. when the Apostle found sin working, and warring and leading him captive, yet he hangs upon Christ, and blesseth God for Christ, and believeth he should be delivered from the guilt and power of his sins by Jesus Christ.

When the filthiness of my sins made me afraid that God would not pardon, because I had such vile affections, and such filthy mo∣tions in my heart, God comforted me with that word, Ezek. 36. 25. I will sprinkle clean water upon you, and ye shall be clean from all your filthiness, and I will cleanse you, & v. 29. I will save you from all your uncleannesses. And from Act. 13. 38, 39. the promise is to all that believe, and here is promised Justification from all things—So as no sin, no cir∣cumstance in any sin shall be charged upon any believer to his condemnation.

Jul. 14. 1667. Having found my heart departing from God in a very treacherous man∣ner, this did cloud my Evidence of pardon, but after prayer I was confirmed in the belief of the forgiveness of my sin, from Jer. 3. 2, 20, 22. Here I saw that though the Jews had

voluntarily without any enticing Temptation prostituted themselves to sin, v. 2. and though they had in a Treacherous manner departed from God after he had taken them into a Con∣jugal Relation with himself v. 20. Yet he promiseth upon their return to heal their back∣slidings. My Faith was further established by considering that remission of sin was promised to me in the Covenant, which Covenant should never be removed from me. Isa. 54. 9, 10. Also Dan. 9. 9.

When God had once and again cleared up to my Soul the Pardon of my sins, I consi∣dered with my self what duties this mercy called for: And I saw,

1. This should make me thankful. Psal. 103. 1, 2, 3.

2. It should make me admire God. Mic. 7. 18, 19.

3. It should make me more fearful of of∣fending God. Ps. 130. 4.—85. 8.

4. It should make me Love God much. Luke 7. 42, 43, 47.

5. It should make me glorifie God, and let him have the Dominion over my Soul. Rev. 1. 5, 6.

6. It should make me cheerful and en∣courage me in all the troubles of this present life. Mat. 9. 2. Isa. 33. ult.

7. It should oblige me to forgive others. Eph. 4▪ 32. Col. 3. 13.

8. It should make me willing to be em∣ployed in any Service for God. Isa. 6. 7, 8.

Evidences of my Interest in, and Ʋnion with Jesus Christ.

1. Faith in Christ Joh. 17. 20, 21. Christ prayeth that all that believe in him through the Word may be one in him, and the Father always heareth him. Joh. 11. 42. Now I find (blessed be God) that through the Word I do believe in Christ.

2. Effectual Calling. 1 Cor. 1. 9. 26. 30. God is faithful by whom ye were called—Ye see your calling—Ye are in Christ Jesus. Now through mercy I find God hath called me out of darkness into his marvellous light, he hath called me to the knowledge and Faith of Christ.

3. Walking after the Spirit and not after the Flesh. Rom. 8. 1. It is not said, they that are in Christ have no flesh in them, but they walk not after the flesh.

4. Christs giving us his Spirit is an evi∣dence that he abideth in us. 1 Joh. 3. 24. Now I find by the fruits of the Spirit men∣tioned, Gal. 5. 22, 23. that God hath given me his Spirit, and also by my being able to cry Abba Father. Gal. 4. 6.

5. Crucifying the flesh with the affections and lusts thereof. Gal. 5. 24. that is, our cor∣rupt

nature, with the works thereof mentioned v. 19, 20, 21. The flesh and lusts thereof is Crucified, when so subdued that it doth not reign. Rom. 6. 6. which I find, blessed be God.

6. Keeping Christs word. 1 Joh. 2. 5. which I desire and endeavour.

The Comfort and Priviledge flowing from hence is, that I am,

1. Free from Condemnation. Rom. 8. 1.

2. Assured of Glory. Col. 1. 27. 1 Joh. 5. 12.

3. Interessed in Christs Wisdom, Righte∣ousness, Sanctification, and Redemption. 1. Cor. 1. 30.

4. Interessed in all Spiritual and Heavenly blessings. Eph. 1. 3.

5. Compleat in him, though imperfect in my self. Col. 2. 10.

Evidences that God is my God.

1. My being in Covenant with God. Wherein the great blessing promised is, that God will be our God. Heb. 8. 10. and my being in Covenant is evidenced to my Soul by my coming to, and closing with Christ the Mediator of the Covenant; for he promiseth

to make an Everlasting Covenant with such as come to him. Isa. 55. 3.

2. My engaging my heart to approach to God. Jer. 30. 21, 22.

3. My being one of Gods Servants, as before. Isa. 41. 9, 10: Thou art my Servant—I am thy God.

4. The Law of God in my heart, and my delight to do the will of God. Jer. 31. 33. Ps. 40. 8.

5. My fear of God. Jer. 32. 38, 39, 40. which fear is discerned by eschewing and departing from evil. Job. 1. 1. Prov. 16. 6.

6. My choosing the Lord for my God. Ps. 16. 2. and voluntary giving up my self to him, to obey his voice and keep his ways. Deut. 26. 17, 18, 19. Jer. 7. 23.

7. My willingness to leave earthly Enjoy∣ments at the call of God, setting loose to the world, looking upon my self as a Stranger and Pilgrim on the Earth, and preferring and seeking Heavenly things above Earthly. For God is not ashamed to be called their God that are, and do thus. 11. 13, 14, 15. 16.

Hence I infer for my Comfort.

1. Gods Audience of my Prayers. Mic. 7. 7.

2. Gods presence with me in all Conditi∣ons. Isa. 43. 1, 2, 3.

3. A supply of all my wants. Ps. 23. 1.

4. Strength and Assistance to all Services or Sufferings. Isa. 41. 10.

5. He will be my God and Guide for ever. Ps. 48. 14.

6. He will Pardon my sins, and not for∣sake and cast me off. Mic. 7. 17, 18, 19. 1 Sam. 12. 20 22. Jer. 51. 5.

And I Charge it on my self, as my Duty,

1. To walk humbly with God. Mic. 6. 8.

2. To seek him early. Ps. 63. 1.

3. To praise and exalt him. Ps. 116. 28.

4. To Love him above all with all my heart. Deut. 6. 5.

5. To turn to him when ever I shall depart from him. Hos. 12. 6.

6. To trust in him continually for all things. Psal. 18. 2—91. 2. Yea in times of greatest danger, distress, and fear. Psal. 31. 13, 14. Ps. 42. 11. 1 Sam. 30. 4. 6.

Evidences of Gods Love to my Soul.

1. His drawing of me to Christ. Jer 31. 3. Whom God drawes he Loveth with an ever∣lasting Love. Now I find that God hath drawn me, because my Soul is come to Christ, and goeth dayly to him, and no man can come to Christ except the Father draw him. Joh. 6. 44.

2. His giving me Faith. He loveth those that through the Word believe in his Son, even as he loveth his own Son. Joh. 17. 20. 23.

3. God Loveth those that Love him, and that Love his Son Jesus Christ. Prov. 8. 17. 1 Joh. 4. 19. Joh. 14. 21.—16. 27. I find that God hath given me an heart to Love him, and his Son Jesus Christ.

4. A Principle of Spiritual life infused in∣to my Soul, whereby I live to God is an Evi∣dence of Gods Love to me. Ezek. 16. 6. 8 Eph. 2. 4, 5.

5. God Loveth not only the Righteous. Ps. 146. 8. but such also as follow after Righ∣teousness. Prov. 15. 9. which through grace I find he hath caused me to do.

My Comfort in this is, that this is an ever∣lasting Love. Jer. 31. 3. Joh. 13. 1. No∣thing shall separate me from it. Rom. 8. 38, 39. No not my Sins. Ps. 89. 30, 31, 32, 33, 34. Though the Mountains and hills depart, his loving-kindness shall not depart. Isa. 54. 10. Admire and Adore this Love Oh my Soul. 1 Joh. 3, 1.

Evidences of Gods accepting my Person, and Services.

This enquiry is necessary. 1st. Because both work and Person must come to judgment.

2 Cor. 5. 9, 10. 2ly. Though it be a mercy to have our Service accepted of the Saints, Rom. 15. 30, 31. Yet the main thing we should labour for, is to be approved of God; 2 Tim. 2. 15. For the approbation of men without the acceptation of God is little worth. 2 Cor. 10. ult.

Evidence. 1. Isa. 56. 6, 7. There the Lord promiseth to accept their Burnt-Offer∣ings, and Sacrifices upon his Altar (that is, all their Services which they perform in Christs Name, who is called an Altar Heb. 13. 10. and who was Typified by the Altar under the Mosaical Law) who joyn themselves to the Lord, to Love and serve him, and keep his Sabbath, and take hold of his Covenant: Even to every such Person he promiseth ac∣ceptation of their Services signified by Burnt-Offerings, and Sacrifices. Now blessed be God, he hath enabled me by grace in some measure thus to do.

2. Rom. 14. 18. He that in these things serveth Christ, is acceptable to God. In these things, i. e. in Righteousness, Peace, and joy mentioned v. 17. Here I see that when in obedience to Christs Command, and in discharge of the work, and Calling I have been called to by Christ, I endeavour by Preaching, Writing, Conference, private Instruction, to beget or promote Righteous∣ness, Peace or joy in the Holy Ghost, I am accepted of God.

3. Act. 10. 35. In every Nation he that feareth God and worketh righteousness is ac∣cepted of him. We then work righteousness when we work that which God commands us. Ps. 119. 172. All thy Commandments are righteousness. This I endeavour.

4. Gen. 4. 7. If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? Then we do well when we serve the Lord faithfully. Mat. 25. 23. and when we shew Love to our Neigh∣bour. Jam. 2. 8. whereof I have the Testi∣mony of my Conscience.

Evidences of Eternal Life.

God hath out of his free grace (blessed be his Name) given me good hope of Eternal Life from these Scriptures:

1. Joh. 3. 16. Whosoever believeth in Christ shall not perish, but have everlasting life. This promise hath oft refreshed and satisfied my Soul, when I have been Com∣muning with my own heart about the grounds of my hope of Eternal Life. For I find that God hath given me an heart to believe in Christ; and the promise is, Whosoever be∣lieveth, without any exception of the great∣ness, frequency, or long continuance of our sins; when I have been unable to work the works of God, I have found an heart to be∣lieve.

2. 2▪ Sam. 23. 5. Although my house be not so with God, yet God hath made with me an everlasting Covenant ordered in all things and sure; for this is all my Salvation, and all my desire although he make it not to grow. Here I observed, 1st. That being in Cove∣nant with God is a sufficient ground to hope for Salvation. This is all my Salvation, he hath made with me an everlasting Covenant. 2ly. The sinful infirmities and miscarriages of the Servants of God, should not discourage them from hoping in God for Eternal Sal∣vation by vertue of his Covenant. David had been guilty of several miscarriages, be∣sides his great failing in the matter of Uriah, as unbelief. 1 Sam. 27. 1. dissimulation and lying to Achish. v. 10. Unkind if not unjust dealing with Mephihosheth, in giving away half his Estate upon a false Accusation of Ziba. 2 Sam. 19. 27, 28, 29. &c. Yet in a dying hour he relieth on God for Salvation, not∣withstanding his miscarriages, by vertue of the Covenant. Although my house be not so with God (he includeth himself as the chief part of his house, although he had not so walked in his house with God as God re∣quired) yet this is my Salvation God hath made with me an everlasting Covenant. 3ly. Though he did not see the growth or accom∣plishment of several promises, in the Cove∣nant, yet he is not dismayed or beaten off from hoping for Salvation, but saith, this is all

my Salvation, although he make it not to grow. Enquiring with my self what ground I had to hope that this Covenant was made with me, I was satisfied from Isa. 55. 3. Where I find those that come unto Christ are taken into Covenant, and enjoy the same pro∣mises and mercies that God gave to David.

3. Joh. 17. 2. Thou hast given him power over all flesh, that he should give eternal Life to as many as thou hast given him. Enquiring what ground I had to believe that I was given to Christ, I was satisfied from Joh. 6. 37. All that the Father giveth me shall come to me. Our coming to Christ is an Argument that we are given to Christ by the Father, because all such, and none but such come to Christ. v. 37. 44. 65. I was further Confirmed from Joh. 17. 9, 10. Where Christ gives this Character of such as are given to him, that he is glorified in them, and I find through mercy that the Lord hath inclined my heart to glorifie him.

4. Joh. 10. 27, 28, 29. My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me, and I give to them eternal Life, and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father which gave them me is greater than all, and no man is able to pluck them out of my Fathers hand. Here I observed, 1st. That the Lord Jesus hath promised to give unto his sheep Eternal life▪ 2ly. He undertaketh for them for the time to

come, that they shall never perish. They shall not perish by their own sins (as unbe∣lievers and unregenerate men do Joh. 8. 24. 2 Pet. 2. 12.) neither shall any person or temptation from without draw them off from Christ. 3ly. The Lord Jesus gives his sheep a two-fold Argument to assure them that they shall not perish, either by their own corruption, or by any force or allurement from without. 1st. He holds them in his hand, i. e, he keeps and preserves them by his power. 2ly. His Father who is greater than all keeps them by his power also. The Comfort of this depend∣ing on the qualification of the persons to whom this promise is made, namely the sheep of Christ, I considered what evidence I had that I was one of Christs sheep. And I saw 1st. That Christs sheep are such as hear his voice, and follow him. Now I found that my heart had Answered the Call of Christ in the Gospel, when he hath called, Look unto me, and be ye Saved; Come unto me all ye that labour & are heavy laden; and moreover that I do endea∣vour to follow his example, and to walk as he walked when he was in this world. 2ly. I saw that by his sheep he meaneth such as do believe on him, because he proveth the Jews were not his sheep, because they did not be∣lieve on him. ver. 26. 3ly. I found those evidences of the Lords being my Shepherd which David mentioneth, Ps. 23. viz. his often restoring my Soul when I have fallen.

His leading me in paths of Righteousness for his Names sake. If the Lord be my sheepherd then I am one of his sheep. 4ly. my return∣ing to Christ through grace is an argument that he is the sheepherd of my Soul. 1 Pet. 2. 25. 5ly. Visiting the sick and feeding the hungry, are the marks of Christs sheep. Math. 25. 33, 35, 36.

5. Ps. 84. 11. God promiseth glory to them that walk uprightly, and I find God hath given me an heart to walk uprightly. In a sickness not knowing but death might be ap∣proaching, I considered what promises I could rest on for salvation, and among others God enabled me to stay, on, Isa. 57. 2. He shall enter into Peace, they shall rest in their beds, Each one walking in his uprightness. These are my Evidences of etarnal life.

God having given me good hope, through grace, of eternal life, I set my self to consider what duties this called for, and God put into my mind, which I resolve by the help of his grace to practise.

1. To bless and praise God for this mercy. 1 Pet. 1. 3, 4. Col. 1. 12, 13.

2. To mortifie daily uncleanness, inordi∣nate affections, evil Concupisence, Cove∣tousness, and all other sins, Col. 3. 4, 5.

3. To carry my self towards all men especially towards my near relations as an Heir of eternal life and glory. 1 Pet. 3. 7.

4. To walk worthy of the Lord. 1 Thes.

2. 12. How that is to be done is expressed Eph. 4. 1, 2, 3. Col. 1. 10.

5. To purifie my self as God is pure, 1 Joh. 3. 3. which implies purity of heart, Math. 5. 8. purity of words in discourse; for every word of God is pure, Prov. 30. 5. and so must ours be also, Eph. 4. 29. Zeph. 3. 9. purity of life, 1 Pet. 2. 22.

6. To Serve God and to serve him in a gra∣cious and Godly manner, Heb. 12. 28.

7. Not to fear them that can kill the body, Luk. 12. 4, 32. Nor fear the want of out∣ward things, ver. 31, 32.

8. To rejoyce in hope of this Glory in the midst of worldly troubles, Rom. 5. 2, 3. 1 Pet. 1. 3, 6.

9. To keep the full assurance of hope to the end of my days by Continuing diligent in Mi∣nistring to the Saints, Heb. 6. 10. 11.

Thus have we given the Reader some account of this Eminent Saint and Servant of Jesus Christ, such was his holy and heavenly life; Thus walked he both in the fear of God, and in the Comfort of the Holy Ghost: Thus la∣boured he to approve himself to God, to others and to his own Conscience: Thus answered he his profession, ran his race, and pressed forward to the mark. Upon the equal and impartial view whereof, though the design of these pages be only Ostendere, and not Ostentare virum, yet I can scarce forbear to say, He hath left such a Name and character behind him as may worthily commend him, both as a Christian and

a Minister to the observation, Honour and Imitation of most, if not All that read him.

What remains is only to apply him to the following funeral Text as a more than ordinary Instance of the truth thereof. And whoso con∣siders the manner of his life may with little doubt conclude his Victory over death, It was before mentioned that he hath left behind him some Manuscripts worthy of the press: some of which he entitles, The best Interest; A Trea∣tise of Glorifying God: The cure of the fear of Death. All which he well understood, not only by Speculation but by Experience. He who had gained the best Interest, and could upon good ground say, My Beloved is mine, and I am his; He who aimed at the best End and industriously pursued it, viz. the Glory of God, was doubtless so fortified with the grace, Consolation and Covenant of God, as to triumph over the King of Terrors. Having the testimony of his Conscience that in Integrity and Sincerity of heart he had fulfilled his general and particular calling, and served his genera∣tion by the will of God, and having the assur∣ance of Gods Holy Word, for his reward in a better World, It was no difficulty to him to die. He was so far above the fear of Death, that he seemed altogether unconcerned at it, as to the terror of it or danger after it, both in sickness and in health. In his perfect health, Considering the evil of the day he lived in, he would often say, It is a good time to die. I am content to live,

and willing to die. To me to live is Christ; I have no other design of life then to serve Christ. He breathed out with Greg: Turon. Domine, siad huc Populo tuo sim necessarius, fiat Voluntas tua. Deside∣ro quietem, non recuso laborem. If God hath further Service for me to do. I am content to live, else I rather choose to die. Such clear apprehensions he had of the Glory of Heaven, and such full assu∣rance of hope thereof, that, as he expressed himself to his Friend, he looked upon all that this world can afford as dross and dung compared with it.

As death was not terrible so neither was it unexpected to him. He presaged it long be∣fore it came. He told his Friend, conversing with him more than a year before he died, that he had apprehensions that he should not long live; and that for some time past, God had in∣clined his heart to study how a Christian might get above the fear of death: And what he found to be his strength and Consolation against that last enemy, he had digested into method, and for his own and others use Committed it to writing, and had almost finished it, and did then lay an ob∣ligation upon his friend in case he did Survive him to perform the last office for him, and commend∣ed to him for his Subject 1 Cor. 15. 57. as the testi∣mony of his affectionate and hearty thanksgiving unto God who gave him the Victory over the fear of Death, through Jesus Christ our Lord.

This was no vain presage; though yet he had a Strong constitution of body, which he had used with all temporance and Sobriety, and was then

in his full strength, and the maturity of his age, Scarce declining from his state of Consistency. His natural temper did somewhat incline him to feaverish diseases. A feaver having Com∣mission from God seised on him, Aug. 31. This Visitation of God (as all former) he ac∣cepted with all Patience and Submission, Cast∣ing himself on the care, and resigning himself up to the will of his Heavenly Father. His disease encreasing and strength declining, he told some about him, that he had some appre∣hensions he should, and desires also if God pleas∣ed, to have died a Martyr, but now he thought he should not. Adding withal, God is wiser than I, and knoweth my weakness.

Discharging his dying office by grave exhor∣tations and encouragement to Serious Religion and Suffering for it, which he especially applied to his only Child; Owning and professing his Nonconformity to the last, as judging himself obliged thereto in Conscience towards God; Blessing God for his invaluable Gift of Jesus Christ to the children of men; Blessing God who had called him to the honourable employment of the Ministry of the Gospel, and had enabled him to be faithful therein, and encouraged him with his presence and blessing under all the dif∣ficulties thereof; Blessing God who had lifted him up above the fear of Death; Rejoycing in the peace and testimony of a good Conscience and hope of the Glory of God, after 10 or 11 days conflict with his disease (which after some

hope of recovery very suddenly and unexpect∣edly seised his head,) He quietly slept in the Lord, Sept. 10. 1680. in the one and fiftieth year of his age.

This being the blessed exit of this Eminent Saint, methinks I hear him say to those he left behind, as his dying Saviour to the daugh∣ters of Jerusalem: Weep not for me, I have died in peace, am entred into peace, am at rest in my bed, have passed through Jordan and am come to Canaan. I am beyond sin, and sorrow, and trouble and labour, am come to the Heaven∣ly Jerusalem, to an innumerable company of Angels, and the spirits of just men made per∣fect, and to Jesus the Mediator of the New Covenant, to that Eternal Sabbath that re∣mains the people of God. Weep not for me.

And doth he not also add, weep for your selves? You shall see my face no more, you shall enjoy communion with me no more, you shall hear my voice no more, I shall despense the Gospel to you no more. Ye shall come to me but I shall return to you no more. O what is the meaning of this dark providence, that in such a day as this, God should call from his work one so fully instructed, so willingly zealous to serve him and his Church in the Gospel of his Son. Whether God hath done this in his just displea∣sure for the unprofitableness, unthankfulness, and itching ears of those that enjoyed so precious a blessing: Or whether to warn us of some ap∣proaching

dreadful judgment from which he hath hid this and other his holy Servants in their graves: or whether both; it concerns us seriously to consider, and upon either account he may say to us, Weep for your selves.

We read, 2 King. 13. 20, 21. Elisha died and they buried him, and the bands of the Moa∣bites invaded the land at the Coming in of the year. And it came to pass as they were burying a man, that behold they Spied a band of men, and they cast the man into the Sepulchre of Eli∣sha; and when the man was let down and touch∣ed the bones of Elisha, he revived and stood up∣on his feet, and Judg. 16. 30. The dead which Sampson slew at his death were more than them which he slew in his life. In allusion to which I conclude with this wish, God avert the bands of the Moabites; but would to God the dead in sin would apply their dead hearts to the Sepulchre of this dead Prophet, that at the touching of his bones they might live, and that the pro∣vidence of his death may be more effectual to the mortifying of sin, in Survivers than all the labours of his life.