Richard Baxter's penitent confession and his necessary vindication in answer to a book called The second part of the mischiefs of separation, written by an unnamed author with a preface to Mr. Cantianus D. Minimis, in answer to his letter which extorted this publication.

Chap. II. (Book 2)

Sect. 1. The Author's Profession of his own Repentance.

§ 1. HE is unfit to profess himself to be called of God, to call others to Repentance, who is Impenitent himself. And what Man hath a louder Call to Repent from God and Man than I my Self? And should I not be truly willing to know my Sin that I may Repent of it, and to confess it, bewail it, and forsake it when I know it; Conscience would tell me that hereby I should aggravate it, beyond all just excuse. Alas, it hath not been so sweet, so profitable, or friendly to me, that I should take its part, or be loth to leave it. It hath been worse to me every day of my Life, than all the Enemies that ever I had in the World: And since God taught me effectually to know what Sin is, and what God, and Christ, and Grace, and the Hope of Heaven is, and to know my Self, all the Sufferings that ever I have had from Men, from Malice, from Envy, from Persecutors, from Slanderers, have been next to nothing to me, in comparison of what in Soul and Body, I suffer daily for and by my Self and Sin.

§ 2. Therefore I humbly and earnestly beg of that God that is the Hater of Sin and the Father of Lights, that he will not deny me that illuminating convincing Grace, which is needful to make me know the truth of my own Condition, nor that uprightness and tenderness of Heart, which is necessary to my true Humiliation, and that I may not forbear any true Confession, which is necessary to my exercise of Re∣pentance, and to my Forgiveness.

It is no time for me to deny or extenuate my Sin, when I am waiting daily in pain and languishing for my final Doom, at my approaching Change, when I shall quit this transitory World, and all its Vanities for ever. If I knew nothing (of dangerous and doubtful Consequence) by my Self, yet am I not thereby justified: And how small a matter should it be to me, to be judged and acquit or praised by Men; when there is one that Judgeth me (by the final Sentence) even the Lord. The false applause and praise of Men (the miserable Hypocrites reward) ad∣deth no Joy to those in Heaven, nor abateth the Misery of those in Hell. Whether they praise or dispraise me, they are all Dying as well as I, and in that day their thoughts perish: And who that seeth a Skull cast up, doth much care what that Man thought of him while he was alive.

Verily, every Man at his best Estate is altogether Vanity: Cease there∣fore, O my Soul from Man.—

§ 3. But what! Must I, or may I therefore Repent of all that men of divers Minds call me to Repent of? How impossible is that? How foolish, and how wicked?

There are above Sixty Books written against me, in part or in the main scope: And I have written above a Hundred and twenty which must needs make work for many mens censure. And are all, or most Wise and Judicious that read and censure them?

I. The Sadduces censure me for asserting the Life to come, and the Resurrection.

II. The Somatists censure me for the asserting of the Difference of Spirits from Bodies.

III. The Antitrinitarians censure me for shewing what Evidence of Trinity in Unity God hath imprinted on the whole frame of Nature and Morality.

IV. The Church-distracting Hereticators censure me, for taking the old Controversies with the Nestorians, Eutychians and Monothelites, to be capable of easier reconciliation, and gentler handling, than it hath found by such fierce Dividers.

V. The Arrians and Socinians say I judge too hardly of them that de∣ny the Godhead of Christ.

VI. The Arminians censure me for holding special Election and Dif∣ferencing Grace.

VII. The hot Anti-Arminians censure me for holding any such free Will and Universal Redemption, as Usher, Davenant, Preston, and such other knowing men have defended.

VIII. The Anabaptists call me to Repentance for Writing so much for Infants Baptism.

IX. The Antinomians deeply censure me as being against Christ and free Grace, and ascribing too much to Man, to Faith, to Work and our own Righteousness, and for detecting their Errours.

X. The Separatists call me to Repentance for separating no further from the Conformists than they force us from them, and separate them∣selves from necessary Truth: And for perswading men to Communion with the Parish Assemblies.

XI. The Conforming Separatists call me to Repentance for not sepa∣rating from all save themselves, and for knowing and owning those to be true Members of the Church of England, and faithful Servants of Christ, whom they eject.

XII. Clement Writer and the Seekers censure me, for asserting the cer∣tainty of Scripture Verity, as sealed by the Spirit by Miracles and San∣ctification; and for maintaining that there is yet continued a true Mi∣nistry and true Churches.

XIII. Mr. Liford and some others censure me for taking the Blasphe∣my of the Holy Ghost, to be fixed Infidels judging Christs Miracles to be by the Devil.

XIV. Mr. Henry Dodwell censureth me for not taking the Office of Presbyters to be specified or measured and varied by the Will of the Bi∣shop or Ordainer, and not determined by the Institution of Christ; and for not denying the Presbyters and Bishops of all the Reformed Chur∣ches to be really Ministers, and their Churches true Churches) who have not an uninterrupted Succession of Canonical Ordination by Diocesans as from the days of the Apostles, and that they commit not the Sin against the Holy Ghost by administring Sacraments as being but Lay-Men; while he holdeth such as the French to be true Ministers.

XV. The Erastians censure me for vindicating the Power of the Keys and the necessity of Ministerial Church Discipline.

XVI. The Independents blame me for being for a National Church; and some of them for being against their unnecessary Covenanting terms of Communion, and their giving too much Power to popular Votes.

XVII. The Scots Presbyterians blame me for blaming the Imposi∣tion of their Covenant; and for being so much for a superior sort of Bishops or Archbishops.

XVIII. The English Diocesan Enemies to Episcopacy, who are for setting up but one sole Bishop and Church, instead of a Thousand, or many Hundred or many Score, do fiercely accuse me, as if it were not they but I that am an Enemy to Episcopacy and the Church; for desi∣ring that Thousands may not be ejected or kept out, and one only under∣take in each Diocess an impossible task.

XIX. The factious Sectarian part of the Conformists, most fiercely and implacably accuse me, for telling them (after many years patient silence) what are the Reasons that I conform not to their imposed Oaths, Covenants, Subscriptions, Declanations and Practices: taking this for an Accusation of those that do, what I dare not do: And because I give not over Preaching. And some of their Writers expect that I falsly accuse my self of a multitude of heinous Crimes, of which they by pal∣pable lying accuse me: As if Lying against my self were an act of Re∣pentance, and a means of Pardon, and were not a Sin as well as to bely another.

XX. The Magistrates and Judges who have oft Imprisoned me, and seized on all my Goods and Books, and driven me out of the County (with the Bishop that forbad my Preaching) accuse me for not ceasing to Preach (when I have unanswerably proved that so to do would be persidious Sacriledge against my ordination Vow and Calling). And when I blamed the Herodians, Priests and Pharisees for seeking to de∣stroy Christ, and forbidding his Apostles to Preach, they said, I meant the Bishops that Silenced such as I, and for this sent me to Prison, with

a Fine of Five hundred Marks: But from the Justices of the Sessions I had the fairest dealing: For when they kept me under many Hundred Pounds Bonds to the good Behaviour (that I might be at their will to take me up as soon as they could find any pretence for an Accusation) they openly professed that they did it not as a Penalty, and had nothing against me, but took me to be Innocent; but the Times being dange∣rous, they were to do it for Prevention (that is, By the order of Judge Jeffreys and the King.)

Now if you can tell me what Confession and Repentance that must be, which must satisfie all these Accusers, or else which of all these Parties it is that I must satisfie, and how I shall know that I shall not be guilty of a multitude of gross Lyes, by the Confessions which they require and expect, you will perform a work which to me seemeth impossible.

Therefore all that I can do is, to search my Heart and Life with a sincere willingness to know the Truth, and to confess to God and Man, so much as I can find to be truly sinful, as far as Men are concerned to know it.

XXI. The Italian and Spanish sort of Papists yet deeplier accuse me than most aforesaid, for denying their pretended Vice-Christ, and con∣futing their Heretical and Schismatical Errors, and proving that by their Conciliar Religion, they profess open Hostility to Christian Kings and Magistrates. One of them 1661. wrote me a Challenge to make this good (having said somewhat of it in my Sermon to the Parliament) which I fully performed: But it hath ever since lain unprinted, for want of License from our Clergy, and Security from the Court.

XXII. The English Diocesan sort who are for an Universal or Fo∣reign Ecclesiastical Jurisdiction, under the Name of General Councils, and a Collegium Pastorum in the intervals governing per Literas format as, the Pope being Principium Unitatis, and Patriarch of the West, are deep Accusers of me for denying all such Universal and Foreign Jurisdiction, as that which is worse than the Italian sort Popery, and would perjure this Land which is oft Sworn against it: And for taking the Principles urged by Grotius (after his Revolt) to be the French sort of Popery, and for being against that Coalition with such on these terms; which said Foreign Jurisdiction is Pleaded for, by Archbishop Laud, Archbishop Bromhall, Bishop Peter Guning, Bishop Sparrow, Bishop Sam. Parker, Dr. Heylin, Mr. Thorndike, Dr. Saywell, Dr. Beveridge, and worse by some others: All which by their own express words, with a full Con∣futation of their opinion, I have written ready for the Press, (and di∣sputed it at large three days with Bishop Guning in the presence of his chosen Witnesses Dr. Saywell and Dr. Beveridge. But Dr. Isaac Barrow against Thorndike hath irrefragably confuted all their Pretensions, not∣withstanding Bishop Parker's vain Contradiction.

XXIII. But the great load of the most Bloody Accusations, is heapt up against me, by the exasperated Clergy and Laity, for my calling them to Repentance for the Sins which I shall after mention; and they fetch most of their Charges from my Actions in the Wars, of which the multitude of Untruths in Matter of Fact which they virulently write and report, I had rather think come from the rash belief of one another in their exasperated Faction, than from the rupture of tumifying known∣Lying Malice and Rage.

But though this vented by Dr. Stillingfleett's nameless Second, in the Book called, The second Part of the Mischief of Separation, be that which Cantianus maketh my Charge, I think it not seasonable here to deal with it, till I have first confest my real Faults.

SECTION 2.

THough I have more than once Published the Confession of many of my youthful and later Sins, the renewed loud call of Accusers and of Approaching Death, provoketh me to do it again, before I call others to Repentance.

And I will mention the Sins of my Childhood for a warning to Chil∣dren to avoid the like: And because the Seeds of following Sins are usually then sown.

I. Though from the first of my remembrance I liked Religious Good∣ness, and feared sinning since my Father had talkt to me of God and Sin and the World to come, yet it was many Years before I was hum∣bled for my Original Sin, or felt much of the need of a Saviour, or un∣derstood the Doctrine of the Scripture, but only delighted in the Histo∣rical part: And though my Conscience troubled me for a Lie to scape Danger, it did not always keep me from it.

II. If the most pleasing Sin be the greatest, the Delight in feigned Histories called Romances, was my great, because my most delightful Sin.

III. Though my Appetite inclined only to the coursest and poorest Diet, yet therein I pleased it foolishly and sinfully to the utter ruine of my Health: which I the rather mention to bid Parents look to their Childrens Health in the quality and quantity of their Food, as they love their Life and Comforts. My delightful Diet was so much in Apples, and Pears, and Plumbs, and Cheese that possest my Sto∣mach early with an uncurable excessive Flatulency, and my Veins with remediless Obstructions, and bred so long and violent a Cough, as that brought me into present danger of a Phthysis: To Cure which (after three Years) taking excessively Garlick and flos Sulphuris, inclined me to such a great long continued Bleeding, as exhausted my Natural Heat▪ and Strength.

IV. Though we had great plenty of such Fruit at Home, sometime with a grudging Conscience, I ventured over the Hedge to a Neigh∣bours Fruit. A Sin that Austin himself confesseth.

V. I was in a School where one or two Lads corrupted many, by obscene talk, and immodest actions: In which I did not suffi∣ciently disown them or rebuke them▪ but oft too much countenanced them in it: As also in fighting and abusing the weaker, though I was unable thereto my self.

VI. Though I was bred under many meer Readers, and Tipling or Drunken Schoolmasters and Curates, and scarcely heard a Sermon in a long time, till I was about Fourteen years of Age, or then and after none that I felt any profit by, I was not troubled at the loss, nor at my ignorance and unprofitableness.

VII When it pleased God by reading some good Books, and by my danger of Sickness, about Fifteen years of Age to waken my Consci∣ence, I was not so obedient to that awakening Call as I should have been: But was oft tempted to my old sin of pleasing my Appetite, and had almost been drawn away to a covetous love of Gaming at Cards: But God quickly check'd it by an unusual Providence.

VIII. I was strongly possest (I think by Pride joyned with a Love of Learning) to have setled at the University till I had attained some Eminency of Learning and Titles; but God in great Mercy by Sickness and other hinderances saved me from that danger, and loss of time, and bred me up in a more humbling way, and gave me some little help of safe and pious Countrey Tutors.

IX. Weakness keeping me in expectation of Death, and God then having given me a greater sence of Mans Everlasting state, and of the differences between Faith and Hypocrisie, Holiness and a worldly state, I thirsted to win others to the same sense and state; and to that End offered my self to Ordination when I was too low for so high a Work, both in Learning, and in a methodical knowledge of Theology. And though I was naturally inclined to Logical and Metaphysical Ac∣curateness and method, I was too ignorant in Languages and Mathema∣ticks, and divers parts of Knowledge; had I not been a continual Learner (by Books) while I was a Teacher, I had been a dishonour to the Sacred Office and Work, and do repent that I made such haste.

X. I too rashly in this Ignorance took the Judgment of the Countrey Ministers that had been my Helpers, and told me of the Lawfulness of Conformity, and believed the Books for Conformity which they per∣swaded me to read, for the English frame of Government and Sub∣scriptions, before I had read impartially what was against it, or heard any speak on the other side, or had well studied the case: And so I subscribed sinfully because temerariously: And though I was so rash that I cannot say, that I am sure that I took the Oath of Canonical Obe∣dience

(it is so long since) yet I think I did, because else I had not been Ordained. Of this I repent, and beg forgiveness for the Merits of Christ. (Though I had never been like to have been a Minister without it, but had turned to some other Calling.)

XI. Though I know not that ever I broke the Oath of Canonical Obedience▪ or ever disobeyed my Ordinary, yet I changed my Judg∣ment, of the Canons, of which I cannot repent: While I lived a year as a Schoolmaster my Ordinary commanded me nothing which I disobey∣ed: When I removed to a Priviledged place (Bridgnorth) I was only a Lecturer, and my Ordinary commanded me nothing which I did not: I did read most of the Liturgy, and kneel at the Sacrament: And my Ordinary himself Baptized without Crossing, and never com∣manded me to use it, or the Surplice. VVhen I came to Kidderminster Bishop Thornbury died, and Bishop Prideaux never gave me any Com∣mand or Prohibition, I being a meer Lecturer that never had Presenta∣tion, and the Vicar using the Liturgy and Ceremonies. But yet I re∣pent ••••at I did think worse of that sort of Diocesane Government, which puts not down the Parochial Pastors and Churches than I now do, and these Forty years have done: For I think that a General Epis∣copacy over many Churches and Bishops, is Jure Divino an Order suc∣ceeding Apostles and Evangelists in that part of their Office which as Ordinary must continue.

But I repent not that I renounced that sort of Diocesanes who put or keep down all the Parochial Pastors or Bishops, and Churches, making them but as Chappels, Parts of a Diocess as the lowest Church, and taking on them the sole Episcopacy of many score or hundred Churches. Nor do I repent of my unanswered Treatise of Episcopacy written against this sort.

XII. Though I ever disliked the Censorious and Separating Spirit, that run into Extreams against Conformity, yet I Repent that I did no more sharply reprove it: But because almost all the people where I came to preach that were not meer VVorldlings, but seemed to be seriously Religious, were either against Conformity, or wish'd it removed for the Divisions which it caused, I overmuch valued their Esteem and Love, because I loved their serious piety; and having sometimes (but very seldom) spoken against the Corruptions of the Church Govern∣ment, specially the Silencing of Ministers▪ I can scarce tell to this day, whether I did well or ill; more good by telling Men what to lament and pray against, or more hurt by heartening those that were apt overmuch to Censure Government and the Orders of the Church. But I beg God to forgive what was amiss.

XIII. Though I desired such a frame of Episcopal Government as Sir Edward Deering offered, or as since Archbishop Usher hath described as Primitive, yet out of the sense of the evil that Silencers and Persecu∣tors

had done, I too much rejoiced when the Tidings came that the Pre∣lacy was Voted down, not knowing then what would be set up, nor well what to desire: For neither Presbytery nor Independency had been then debated, or were well understood.

XIV. VVhen I heard of the Scots Covenanting and Arming, and entering England, though I had not so much knowledge of their Cause, as should be a just satisfaction in so great a matter, yet I was in Heart glad of it, for the appearance that it shewed, of enabling the Lords and Commons of England, to appear more boldly to plead for their Liber∣ties and Laws. But I now think that a Suspension of my thoughts, as wanting Evidence, had been better.

XV. VVhen I heard of the tumultuous manner of the Apprentices in London, petitioning against Bishops, I disliked it, and the means that encouraged them, and the publick reproach that was cast by the Rab∣ble on those called Straffordians (such learned men as the Lord Faulk∣land▪ Lord Digby, &c.) yea, and the urging the King so much for his Execution: But I too much silenced my dislike.

XVI. VVhen I saw Mr. Burton's Protestation Protested, and the for∣wardness of many Religious unlearned Persons, to run toward Ex∣treams against Liturgies and Forms, and their kindness to the Princi∣ples of Separation▪ I greatly disliked it and contradicted them, and concurred in judgment with Excellent John Ball▪ who foresaw the danger and betimes wrote against it. But I opposed it with far less Zeal than I had done, if I had then foreseen what followed.

XVII. VVhen the News came of the Irish Insurrection and Mur∣dering 200000 it possest us with such a pannick fear of them and other Papists as scarce left our Judgments free to calm deliberate determina∣tion: But we could scarce sleep for fear of sudden assaults, when calm reason might have told us, that the danger could not be so sudden and near.

XVIII. VVhen there appeared a probability of a Civil VVar, I read the Observator * 1.1, and some such others, that made the King to be singulis Major at Universis Minor; and I did not for some weeks at least discern the Error of that Assertion, as I shortly after did; and when I found Ri. Hooker lib. 1. going as far, and making Legislation to be the proper work of the whole Body, and Bishop Bilson telling us in how many cases the King might by Arms be resisted, and Grotius de Jure Belli, and W. Barkley enumerates many, and speaking yet higher, I was much the more quieted in receiving some such Principles. But consi∣deration soon taught me to say that the people had the Meliority, but not the Majority; that is, They were to be preferred to the King in genere Causae finalis▪ but not in point of Governing Authority: And so I for∣sook Hooker's Politicks▪ but not Bilson's, Jewel's, Grotius's &c. But I repent of that Error, though it was but short.

XIX. No Town in Worcester-shire was so famous for Pageants, and pompous Shews and Revels, and Debauchery at such times as Kidder∣minster: And at the times of those Revels, the Drunkards raged in ma∣lignant fury against the Religious party: But by Gods great Mercy the Religious party there were of so loving, meek and harmless a Temper, inclined humbly to stoop to the meanest, and to do good to all, that there was no one single person that the Rabble had any thing against, but only in general, that they used to repeat Sermons, sing Psalms, and pray, and not be Drunk nor Swear. But the Parliament (before the King parted from them) sent an Order to be published by the Mini∣sters for the defacing of all Images of any of the Trinity in Church Windows, or in Chruch-yards: And for publishing this Order the Drunken Rabble (animated by the probability of the approaching War) rose up against me, and sought in a Tumult with Clubs to kill the Church-Warden and me, (before the Order was Executed) where∣upon (and upon an Accusation to the Sessions, the Articles of which I could never see or hear, or know,) I was forced for a Month to fly to Glocester; where I preached so much for Reformation, (in my sence of the common malignant rage of the Rabble) as I have oft since fear∣ed was too keen, and I since wish'd that I had rather at such a time of dangerous Division, preached more for peace, and to abate exasperations, than to provoke them, though by truth.

XX. I had not been long at home after my return, but the War be∣gan in that Countrey, by the Kings and Parliaments contending for the Militia; and quickly after the first Soldiers that ever I saw raised, was a Troop from Herefordshire raised by Sir W. Crofts, under his Brother James, Dr. Herbert Crofts the other Brother (now Bishop of Hereford) being Chaplain, and the Dr. desiring my Pulpit, I heard him Preach an Eloquent Sermon against the Parliament, as Enemies to the King and Peace: And Sir William Crofts and Sir Francis Nethersoke a little be∣fore meeting there for Consultation, Sir Francis spoke to me to avoid all War against the King, (seeming himself to be against the War on both sides,) telling me by his observations in the Palatinate Wars how little they that begin fore-know of the end: I had no thoughts of med∣ling with War, and so only gave him the hearing. but I have oft since repented that I had not drawn out more of his Reasons, to have help'd my Judgment to a Resolution; especially since I read (in Dr. W. Bates's Vitae virorum illustrium) his words in his Laudatio fenebris of Prince Henry's Death, when he was Orator of Cambridge; in which he seemeth to have been Prophetical, as England felt by sad Experience: I will transcribe part of his Prophesie, Page 412.

Nec illa modo vulnera jam olim obducta, bujus letho recruduerunt, sed alia etiam quae nec dum sentimus, & majora nobis inflicta sunt. Ah, ne hoc FUNUS MILLE PRODUCAT FUNERA! Nec sit dies ille cum

intempestivum hujus Principis fatum, acerbiore luctu quàm hodierno deflebi∣mus, caecis{que} in malis deprensi Principem Henricum, magna voce Princi∣pem Henricum nequicquam clamabimus! Inanis forte est his metus, Aca∣demici, & si meaecum vestris quid valeant preces, inanis erit. Utinam eti∣am & stultus esset. Vivit quidem Priamus, & diu vivat & diu precor. Firma siet ejus domus, nec unquam nutet: Post satum tamen Hectoris, ejus{que} supremum diem cui decem annos spes nostrae innixae sunt, Trojae timere, cum nolim, reluctante licet animo, invitus cogor.] Read the rest; who would think but that he foresaw King Charles Reign, and our cala∣mitous Wars in the Death of Prince Henry?

XXI. The Declarations, and Trumpets that proclaimed the Wars, so enraged the Rabble of Drunkards and Haters of Piety, that the most peaceable Religious Men that did but Pray and sing Psalms, and repeat the publick Sermons, were forced to fly and save their Lives and Goods from their own Neighbours, and the Kings Militia: If a Man had short Hair, and were suspected to be a Puritane (as such were called) the Rabble would cry, [Down with the Roundheads,] and he was in present danger. In this state of Affairs, I went to Worcester for safe∣ty when the Earl of Essex's Army was there, and for curiosity, going to see those that lay at Poike-bridge, was a witness of the flight of the Parliaments Soldiers at Wikefield. But I repented quickly of that cu∣riosity, and going out of my proper way.

XXII. When the first great fight was at Edgehill, I was at Allcester, and for curiosity went with Mr. Sam. Clerke the day after the fight, to see the place, and the Relicts of the unburied slain. But I had no call to so sad a sight.

XXIII. To return home I could not with safety of my life: To maintain my self one Week I had not Money enough with me, nor else∣where. In this strait I went to Coventree, and obtruded my self on Mr. King one of the Ministers, and my old Acquaintance, not paying him a Groat for a Months Diet or more: And at the Months end, the Committee of Coventree invited me to take my Diet and Lodging at the Governours House (Col. John Barker) where I was offered to be Chaplain to the Garrison Regiment, which I refused, but under∣took to preach once a Week to the Soldiers, but without pay. In which place God shewed me for about two years so great Mercy as I can never be sufficiently thankful for: In a quiet, and safe Habitation in the midst of a Kingdom, torn by War, and in pious converse with a great number of Excellent Learned Ministers, that retired thither for safety from the rage of Soldiers; and the Company of as pious understanding Gentlemen of the Committee as I knew living (Sir Rich. Sheffington, Mr. George Abbot, Godfrey Bossevile, and many more) But because it was here that I declared my self for the Parliament, I am here put to open the Case as it stood with me, in order to my re∣quest

to them that think I sinned, yet better to help me by their Counsel and Prayers, that God would convince me if I erred, and par∣don my known and unknown Sin.

SECTION 3.

1. I Did and do believe that the Legislative Power is the chief Flower of the summa potestas, or true Soveraignty: In this Bishop Morley himself fully confirmeth me.

2. I did believe that the Legislative Power was by the Constitution of this Kingdom, in the King and Parliament, and not in the King alone This I believed because the words of the Laws say that they are made by the Consent and Authority of the Parliament; And the King granted it in his Answer to the 19 Propositions (in sence.) And not only Hooker and Bilson, but all the old Bishops and the old Parliaments, Judges and Lawyers commonly held it: And I was not wiser in Law than all they I know few but Bishop Morley that deny that the Par∣liament have part in the power of Legislation: And even he granteth that they are Authors of the matter, to which the King puts the form: And so he makes the Controversie like that of Aristotle and Galen, about Generation, whether the form be only à semine ma••is vel utrius{que}: As if the very Matter cum dispositione receptiva were not an Essential constitu∣tive part.

But now King and Parliament have by a Law of the Rights and Liber∣ties of the Subjects, determined the Case.

3. I did and do believe that it is commonly agreed that Parliaments have five Eminent Relations. 1. They are part of the I egislative power* 1.2 by the Constitution of the Kingdoms. 2. They are the Kings Supream Council. 3. They are the Kings Supream Court of Judicature (by the Lords.) 4. They Represent the Nation as subject to the King. 5. They are the Nations Representatives so far as they are Free: For had they not Liberties and Properties they were meer Slaves.

1. As Subjects they are to obey. 2. As Supream Council they are to be the chief Advisers. 3. As the Supream Court, the King is finally to ex∣ercise Judicature by them. 4. As they represent the people as far as they are Freemen and not Slaves, they are to secure their reserved and natural Liberties and Properties (in their Lives, Limbs, Wives, Children and Acqui∣sitions,) which are not to be taken from them. but by Consent or For∣seiture. 5. Their Legislative power they have not (as Hooker and ma∣ny others think by Nature, but by that Fundamental Contract which made the form of Government: For though Government be of God in the Genus, and as empowered and obliged primarily to promote obedi∣ence to Gods own Laws; yet it is of Man by Contract, that the Persons or Families, or Number and Order of Rulers be constituted, and restraint put on the Invasion of Propriety.

4. I did and do believe Grotius, Lawson, and other Writers of Poli∣ticks, who agree, that the bare Title of Supream given to a King, is no proof that the whole Soveraignty (summa potestas) or Legislation in particular, is in him alone, and not at all in the Senate or Parliament; for it is for Unity sake, Honourary, not excluding, but implying the Parliaments part, and also that he is to exercise his Judicatures by the Legal way of his Courts, Judges and Magistrates.

5. I did and do believe that the King is singulis & universis subditis ma∣jor quoad Fus regendi: and that the people quâ talis have no power of publick Government, but that he is not Universis melior: And that me∣liority maketh the final Cause: And that salus populi, or bonum publicum is the Essentiating End or terminus of Humane Government: And it is no Government (save equivocally) which is destructive of this End.

6. I believe that the same God that Instituted Political Government, did also make, 1. Self-Government. 2. Paternal Government. 3. Marital Government. 4. And Pastoral Church Government: And that no King hath any Right to null any of these, or alter them in Es∣sentials or Integrals; but only to over rule them.

7. I believe that all Power is of God, and no King hath any but what God hath given him: And that God hath given none against himself, or any of his own Laws: And all Laws are nullities that are against them. And are not Acts of Authority but Usurpation, (as Hooker saith.)

8. But yet he that acteth in one thing without and against Authori∣ty, is to be obeyed in other things where he hath Authority, and not resisted by Arms in every Usurpation, yea the Honour of his Office and true Power is to be preserved, while we refuse obedience to his sinful Usurpation.

9. Grotius and common reason convinced me that where the summa potestas is in King and Senate, each part hath right to defend its own true Part therein: It can be no part in Soveraignty which is meerly at the Will and Mercy of the other part.

10. I did and do believe that the Constitution fixing the chief power in King and Parliament united as one Politick Person; it supposeth that they must not be divided: And that neither part hath power against the other as such: (The King hath power over them as Subjects, but not as Legislators or exempted Proprietors.) So that separating them by fix∣ed opposition is dissolving the Constitution: As separating Soul and Body, Husband and Wife, dissolve Man and Matrimony.

11. Therefore I did and do believe that neither King nor Parliament had any right, to raise an Offensive War against each other! None but unavoidably defensive could be lawful. Therefore the first assailant was the culpable beginner.

12. I did believe that neither the King nor the Parliament as such are

questionable by Law, having no superior Judicature to try them. And that the person of the King is inviolable, there being no Power or Law to punish him, and therefore the Law saith, The King can do no wrong, but it layeth all the blame on the Subjects, who are responsible for their actions.

13. I did and do believe that as every Man hath a power of private Self-defence against a Murderer or Thief, so every Kingdom hath a power or right of publick Self-defence, against Forreign or Home bred Enemies.

14. But I believe that this power belongeth not to a wronged or persecuted party, but only to the Body of the Kingdom: Because their good is not the bonum publicum, and a Civil War would do more hurt than their death or ruin. Nor may a Kingdom defend all its Rights, or revenge all its injuries by a Civil War, which will do more hurt than their wrongs: But where the destruction of the Kingdom is apparently endeavoured, or the change of their Constitution, or a hurt greater than a Civil War, a Self-defence is lawful and necessary.

15. I believe Grotius and all Politicks, that Regere & perdere rempub∣licam are inconsistent, and that whoever declareth his purpose to de∣stroy the Kingdom, can be no King of it: For the terminus is essential to his relation. If it be Murder not to defend the Life of a Brother a∣gainst the assault of a Murdering Robber, it is far worse not to do our Duty to save a Kingdom against publick Murderers, and Destroyers.

16. If a King profess himself a Papist according to the true definiti∣on, he taketh Approved General Councils for the Rule of his Religi∣on: And the Laterane Council sub Innoc. 3. bindeth all Temporal Lords on pain of Excommunication, and Deposition to exterminate all that deny Transubstantiation and others called Hereticks from their Dominions, if they are able; and other Counsels and Popes have the like. And it must be supposed that he that professeth himself so bound in Conscience, is resolved as soon as he can to do it. And he that im∣poseth on them a false Religion, and faith, Turn or Die, professeth to destroy or damn them. Yet may he be endured if he disclaim such Councils, or promise Liberty, till Evidence of perilous attempts nulli∣fie that promise: But if he put the Nation under the power of Soul∣diers Judges, Magistrates of the same profession, it must be supposed that he cannot save the Kingdom from them, or that all they will be neglecters of their own Religion: Or if he put himself into the power of an Army of that Religion, he puts the Nation into their power, though he were a Protestant himself: For he is utterly unable to resist their power when Religion engageth their deluded Consciences to de∣stroy us: And though causless fears will not warrant defensive Arms, rational well-grounded fears will: For when Men are dead it is too late.

17. But it followeth not that therefore a Papist may be resisted in France, Spain, Portugal, or any Papist Kingdom; nor yet a Heathen by persecuted Christians, as in the Roman Empire. Because their Reli∣gion bindeth none of these to exterminate or destroy their own King∣doms, as being of the same Religion as themselves. And the Christians then, and Protestants there now are not the Kingdom, but a Party: Therefore King and Parliament have here newly enacted for the setling of this Crown, that no Papist may be here King or Regent Queen: For though (as in the Pond Judge Hale tells us) two Pikes devoured all the other great store of Fish, and survived only themselves) God never au∣thorized one Man to damn or murder a whole Kingdom.

18. The Interest of the King (his Honour, Safety and Power) and the Interest of the People (their common safety and welfare) are di∣stinct, but must not be opposite. The King is for the Kingdom finaliter under God's Glory, though the People are as Subjects to obey the King, it is to that end, the common good.

19. In application, I did believe that both King and Parliament sin∣fully began and managed this War. For if either or both were wronged, so much was by them to be endured, as was not worse than a Civil War. I believe that the Parliament did very ill, in being emboldened by the Scots Army to provoke the King beyond the degree of meer necessity. And that it was ill done of those that secretly or openly en∣couraged the Apprentices tumultuous way of Petitioning, to move any Parliament Men from following their Judgments; and in permitting the gross Scorns and Abuse of the Bishops and Liturgy. And I believe that after they did yet worse, in taking and imposing the Scots Covenant to procure their help.

20. I did and do believe that yet they did but their Duty, in seeking to redress the dangerous Abuses of Ministerial Governours, and bring∣ing the Instruments by Legal tryal to Punishment: For what purpose else are they a Judicature? Subjects are all under the Law. And the common Judges are Sworn to do Justice, though the King's Seal should be sent to Prohibit them.

21. I did believe that the King did ill to forsake them, and on pre∣tence of the Tumults to gather an Army in Yorkshire, Nottingham and Shrewsbury, and that whose Commissions soever were first dated, his Armed Collection of Men was first raised: But yet that the beginning was by such degrees of mutual Provocation, that to this day it is hard to say, who began.

22. I had read the King's Letter in Spain to the Pope, promising to venture Crown and Life for the Union of the Christian Churches, in∣cluding the Roman: which is recorded in Mr. Chesne the King of France his Geographer, and in Prin and Rushworth. And whether it be true or not that the Scots say in a Book called Truths Manifest, that K. Charles

then in Scotland had possession of their Broad Seal, and put that Seal to a Commission for the Irish Insurrection, I am past doubt that K. Ch. II. granted a Commission to Monk, Manchester and others, to try the Mar∣quis of Antrim's Plea, by which it was proved and determined that he had the K. Ch. I's Commission. Though I believe that the King that caused them to rise, allowed them not to Murder all the Protestants: Put whom else were they to rise against but the Protestants? And must they rise against them and not kill them? And was not the Murderous temper and use of the Irish well known?

23. I know that the Irish a year before Edgehill Fight, on that day Oct. 23. 1641. were to have surprized Dublin: And by the full Account of Dr. Henry Jones since Bishop, and Sir John Temple, and the Earl of Orery, Murdered Two hundred Thousand, and boasted that they did it by the King's Commission: and that when they had done there, they would come hither. Though I believed them not, I knew that Two hundred Thousand men dead are past Pleading their own Cause or de∣fending their Country: It is easie to Plead the justness of their Cause against dead Men that cannot contradict them. Solitudinem faciunt, & Pacem vocant. There is no resisting Murderers in the Grave: And I thought that if the King put in Arms and Power, the English Papists of the same Religion, bound to destroy us, his own good meaning could not preserve himself or us. And I knew that the King stopt the Car∣riage-Horses that were sent by the Parliament to relieve Ireland, and took them for his own Service, and many ways delayed their Relief. Though he offered to go over himself, the Parliament fearing he would go to Head the Irish.

24. The King had before assaulted the Parliament-House in Person, with Armed Men, to have surprized Five Members and the Lord Kim∣bolton whom he accused: And after frustration confest it a Breach of their Privileges.

25. The Money sent Dolbier to buy German Horses, and other actions, and the Confessions of Sir Jacob Astley, Sir John Conniers, Sir Fulke Haukes (my Mother-in-laws Brother) Chidley, and the other Commanders of the English Army that were to have been drawn up to London, together with the King's putting a Guarding Regiment on them, did put me past all doubt that they were devoted to violence, had they not defended themselves: And no vain Talk to the contrary can make me doubt of it to this day. So that though I think they had done more prudently to avoid War, had they spared Strafford and Laud to please the King, yet I am fully satisfied that afterward they were necessitated to save themselves from designed Force.

26. I am certain that two things filled the Parliaments Armies. And both of grand Importance. 1. That all over the Kingdom, save here and there a sober Gentleman, and a formal Clergyman, the Religious

Party and all that loved them, were generally for the Parliament (alie∣nated from the Persecutors and Silencers): And the Profane Party in all Countries (Debaucht Gentlemen, Malignant Haters of Piety, the Rabble of Drunkards, Blasphemers) were generally against the Parlia∣ment. And religious People were loth to herd with such: And could hardly believe that in so great a Cause God would reveal the Truth to all his Enemies, the sensual Rabble, and hide it from the generality of them that fear him: And especially that in most Countries the Malig∣nants forced away the Religious, and either rose against them them∣selves, or set the King's Soldiers to Plunder and Destroy them. My own Father living 18 Miles from me was Plundered by the King's Sol∣diers, though he never scrupled Conformity, nor ever medled against the King, and was thrice laid in Prison, and had still lain there, had not Sir Fulke Haukes his Brother in Law been by Prince Rupert made Gover∣nour of Shrewsbury, and this for nothing. And after laid in again till the Town was taken. This last was only because when they made him Collector for the King, he refused to distrein of those that paid not (fearing lest he should be put to repay it).

And almost all the Religious People of Kederminster were forced to fly and leave their Houses and Trades to their undoing, to save their Lives, though they had never medled with Wars. And the men that had no maintenance of their own, were forced to become Garison-Soldiers in Coventry, to avoid Famine.

The second thing, and the main that drove men to the Parliament Garisons and Armies, was the Irish Murders, with the Papists Power with the King: They thought that it must be an unusual War, that should Kill Two hundred Thousand: As dreadful as it was, I do be∣lieve that all the Wars of England Kill'd not Fifty thousand, nor near it. And though Fear which is a Tyrant, overcame partly their Discretion, yet this joyned with the Experience of that which forced them from home, was too strong a tryal for most to overcome.

And it confirmed their Suspition when the Queen brought in a Po∣pish Army under General King, and the Earl of Newcastle's Army had so great a number of Papists, and after the Earl of Glamorgan was autho∣rized to have brought over an Army of Irish Papists, and the English Regiments that fought there against them, had been called hither to fight against the Parliament, and were routed at Nantwich.

No wonder if men thought that England would have been made too like to Ireland whether the King would or not, had such Armies Con∣quered.

27. The Parliament Protested to be for the King, and not against his Person, or Legal Power or Prerogative, but only against his Illegal Will, to defend themselves and the Kingdom, from an unlawful Army, and to bring Delinquents to Legal Tryal and Punishment: And they accor∣dingly

gave out all their Commissions; till the Cause was changed by fairfax's Commission, that left out the King. And the Soldiers of the Garison where I was, commonly believed this to be their Obliga∣tion, and the true Case of the War, viz. Offensive against armed Delin∣quents as the Sheriff may raise the Posse Comitatus), and Defensive against the Kings illegal Will, and Way.

28. I did believe that if the King by such an Army as he had, should Conquer the Parliament, the Legal and all Probable Security of the Na∣tion, for Life Property, Liberty and Religion, was in all likelihood gone; If it should lye on the King's Will only, thereby it were gone: For what then were our Constitution, or Parliaments for; and what differ we from Slaves? And were he willing (and those with him that meant well) he would not be able to Master such an Army.

29. I did believe that if the Parliament were certainly more faulty than they were, the Kingdoms Security was not therefore to be forsa∣ken by the Subjects; nor all Parliaments and Government to be left to the Will of the King, who had for so many years interrupted Parlia∣ments, and dissolved them still in Displeasure, and had raised Taxes called Ship-money by himself without them, and on the same account might command all the rest: Therefore I owned not any of the discerned Miscarriages of the Parliament, but only thought I was bound to defend the common Good and Safety, as it was the End of Government. My judgment yet is, That if the King of England wrongfully begin a War against France, the Subjects ought by Arms to help him, not owning his wrong Cause, but to save the Kingdom, which would be lost and enslaved if he were Conquered. So the fault of the Parliament could not disoblige the People from labouring to secure the Constitution of the Kingdom, and therein their Posterities, Properties, Liberties and Safety. And the bare Promise of a King is no such Security.

30. I did believe that if there were a Controversie in these Cases, the Supream Council and Judicature of the Kingdom, had the most satis∣fying Power of Determination to particular Persons: As the Judgment of a General Council is preferable to any lower Judges, and the Judg∣ment of the College of Physicions is more authoritative than of a single Dr. And the Judgment of the University is more than of the Vice∣Chancellors or one Man. And tho yet it may fall out that the Dis∣senter may be in the right, the unlearned that cannot confidently judge, are more excuseable for not resisting the higher Judges.

31. Obj. By this Rule, whatever wrong a Parliament shall do to the King, we must all take their part against him: And if they betray their Trust, we must bear them out in their Treachery.

Ans. 1. Distinguish between a wrong to the King, and the be∣traying of the Bonum Publicum, the common Safety and the Con∣stitution.

2. And between a Case controvertible, and a Case clear and certain. And so I answer, 1. If a Parliament wrong the King, we must not joyn with them in wronging him; nor own their wrong; nor defend the Persons from legal Justice. He might have dissolved them and cal∣led another, had he not past a Law to the contrary. He may Impeach any Members at their own Bar: But at what Judicature shall he try the highest Judicature it self.

2. And if the Representative would treacherously destroy the Con∣stitution, and yield to enslave them, or to give up the Kingdom to the Pope or any Foreign Power, the Case being past Controversie, the Peo∣ple have not thereby lost the natural Power of Self-defence: But may as lawfully choose more trusty Representatives, and fight for Self defence against such Traitors, as against a Tyrant.

3. But the species of the Constitution, (in King and Parliament) must still be maintained, and the Salus Populi without respect to which there is no Government. And no personal Faults can forfeit that.

32. Therefore I ever thought, as it was a dissolution of the Consti∣tution for the King to put down Parliaments, and pretend (as Bishop Morley blindly pleadeth) to the sole Power of Legislation; so it is Trea∣son for a Parliament to put down Monarchy, and to assume the sole Legislative Power; As the Rump did when they pretended to settle a Government without a King or House of Lords.

If either King or Parliament personal should forfeit their Power, the Kingdom doth not thereby forfeit their right in the constituted Form of Government, by a King and Parliament.

SECTION 4.

I Have interposed this account of the Principles on which I acted; I will next add an account of my Actions hereupon, and then return to the Confession of my own Sins as far as I know them.

1. Refusing a Chaplain's Commission, I continued about two Years or more in Coventry, as a Lecturer to the Garison and City, in quietness, save that we daily heard of all the dismal Wars abroad. Only twice I went out with them, 1. To take in Tamworth Castle that cost no Blood, 2. And to besiege Banbury Castle, whose Soldiers rob'd Warwickshire, and the Travellers and Carriers on London Road. But thence we were raised and driven home with some loss.

Also for two or three Months the care of my Native Countrey and of my Father drew me into Shropshire, with some that went to settle a Garison at Wem: There and at Longford House I staid till my Father was delivered from Imprisonment by Exchange, for a short time.

2. All that ever I converst with, did all this while protess to own the King, and only to separate him from an Army of Delinquents, and

to reunite him and his Parliament: And we thought all the Armies had intended no worse. But when Naseby Fight was past, having heard that the King was left out of the New Commissions, I went to see the Field where the Fight was, and the Army: And there accosted me some sober honest Captains, and told me that their Army was corrupted by the fault of the Ministers, that had all forsaken them, being weary of the La∣bour, and impatient of the Sectaries in the Army, and so they were all left to the Preaching of their own Officers and Souldiers, and a few Chaplains of their own Mind and Choice. And that the bold Leaders began already to say, that God hath committed the safety of the Na∣tion to their trust; And what were the Lords and Knights in William the Conqueror's time, but his Colonels and Captains? In a word, I under∣stood by them that they had a purpose to set up themselves, and to overturn the Government of Church and 〈◊〉〈◊〉. This so surprized me, that whereas these Captains intreated 〈◊〉〈◊〉 among them, and got Col. Whalley (who then seemed of their 〈◊〉〈◊〉) to invite me to his Re∣giment, I took but one days time to answer them. And I opened the sad Case that we were all like to be in, to an Assembly of Ministers in Coventry, whom I gathered to counsel me, and told them what I found, and that the Land was now like to fall into their hands: and that though I thought it was too late, I was inclined to venture my life among them in seeking to reclaim them. The Ministers (Dr. Bryan, Dr. Grew, Mr. King, Mr. Brumskill, Mr. Morton, and others seeing my inclina∣tion gave their consent: But the Committee (after consent) refusing, I was forced to tell them what I saw and heard in the Army, and what Danger the Kingdom was in, and so to go away against their will: But Col. W. Puresoy a Confident of Cromwell's, threatened me for such words, and I imagine sent Cromwell word that Night: For the next Morning I was met with scorn, and I suppose all known to Cromwell that I had said: and Cromwell would never after allow me any opportunity, beyond the Regiment that I joyned to: And there I spent near two years in Labours and Disputings against well-meaning perverted Sectaries, if it had been possible to have turned them from what they after did. But my capacity was narrow (though there I prevailed with most). And I got Mr. Cook (since of Chester, that suffered much for the King, and after by the King) a great Enemy to Sects and Sedition, to come and help me; but they wearied him away: And besides Mr. Bowles, I know none but perverse Sectaries, (part Arminians, but most Antinomians or worse) left to be their Teachers.

I told the Parliament Men what the Army would do, and warned them to prepare: But it was too late: Cromwell and his Confederates did all, and made a Stale of Fairfax's Name; and Vane and Haslerigge and their Friends in Parliament, disbanded all the sober Souldiers in Garisons and Bragades that would have resisted them; and so put the

Power of King, Parliament and Kingdom into their hands, and some of them repented when it was too late.

In Feb. 1656/7. they began their Conspiracy against the Parliament in a Meeting at Nottingham, and that very day God separated me from them by Bleeding 120 Ounces at the Nose (at Milborne in Derbyshire) when else I had (in vain) hazarded my life against them at Triploe Heath, by drawing from them as many as I could. But Sir Edward Hatley and other Officers that did it, and drew off about Five thousand did but strengthen them. For Cromwell fill'd up their places with Sectaries and Soldiers that had served the King before, and was stronger than before, as having none to distrust.

To tell what they did after against the Eleven Members, and then against the Majority of the Parliament, and then against the King, and then against the Rump, and then against the Ministry, and how Cromwell contrived himself into the Supremacy, would be to write the History of that time, and to Epitomize Whitlock.

This much I thought necessary to premise to my own review of my actions, and for them that call me to Repentance, who while they falsly judge of the History, can be no true Judges of the Application. I proceed therefore to the exercise of Repentance as far as I can know.

SECTION 5.

XXIV. I Greatly repent that I at Coventry took the Scots Covenant, for the many Reasons which I shall hereafter rehearse. And that once I gave it to one Man, a Papist Physition who pretended to be converted, and desired me to give it him: But suspecting his Hypocrisie, I never gave it more, but kept I think Thousands from taking it in Wor∣cestershire and elsewhere. I thought at first that it was intended only as a Test to the Garisons and Armies, and knew not that it would after be made a dividing test for the Magistracy, and Ministry through the Land: which yet by the tenour of it, I might have understood. But I repent not that I neither sware nor subscribed that no man that ever took it, is obliged by it to that part which is good and necessary: Per∣jury is no jesting Matter.

XXV. I more repent that I once publickly defended it against a Writing of Sir Francis Nethersole, which he wrote against Mr. Vines, who had Preached for it. And that I did not more impartially consult with Sir Francis, and hear all that he had to say against it: For he was near us, and I Preacht to him once at Kenelworth-Castle, where as a Pri∣soner he was liker the Master of that Pleasant Seat (under Colonel Need∣ham) for he seemed purposely to force the Committee to Imprison him, by constant provoking them, who would fain have let him alone: But by that means he saved House-keeping, and scaped both Plundering

and Sequestring on both Sides, and secured his Estate, and his Person in a place of freedom and delight by Water and Land.

XXVI. And though I thought that a Parliament's Judgment was above all Lawyers, yet I repent that I had not more diligently consulted Law∣yers on the other side: Though indeed I knew not well where to find them, the Lawyers of my Acquaintance being for the Parliament.

XXVII. And whereas I then thought that Neutrality was a heinous Sin, to stand by in the Danger of the Land; I now repent of that Opinion; considering that in a case of Blood, Men should very clearly be resolved before they venture on either side.

XXVIII. And I repent that I was by Ignorance, in too much fear of Religion by the danger of Arminianism; and thought too hardly of the Laudian party on that account: For though I am no Arminian, I have fully proved in my Catholick Theology, that the difference is more ver∣bal and small, than the Zealots of either side do imagine: which Book is yet answered by none.

XXIX. Accordingly, I at Coventry engaged in a dispute against Mr. Cradock, and Mr. Diamond, to prove Remission of Sin (not only Con∣ditional but Actual) to be an Immediate effect of Christ's Death, and pleaded for it, Heb. 1. 3. and Rom. 8 32. (and against Universal Re∣demption) which I since perceive I misunderstood and abused.

XXX. I repent that I sooner enquired not into the danger that the Land was in by Cromwell and his Sectaries: And I repent that when his fundamental Troop at Cambridge (which after made Commanders headed his Army) wrote to me with Subscribed Names to be their Pa∣stor, I refused and rejected the offer to their offence, telling them that I was neither for a Military Church nor an Independent popular Church; Had I gone to them then, what might I have prevented?

XXXI. Though I am not able to see, that I did not my Duty (my most Self-denying and costly Duty) in taking the defence of the Nation, Religion, King and Parliament (to be reduced to Unity) to be my ne∣cessary Employment (while I owned not their Miscarriages) yet know∣ing the frailty of my understanding, I daily beg of God, that if I was mistaken he will make me know it (for which I have long Prayed); and that he will pardon my Sins, which I would fain know, and fain re∣pent of, and publickly confess if I could know them; but dare not take the greatest Duty of my life to be my Sin.

XXXII. I am in great doubt how far I did well or ill in my opposi∣tion to Cromwell and his Army at last. I am satisfied that it was my duty to disown, and as I did, to oppose their Rebellion and other Sin: But there were many honest Pious men among them: And when God chooseth the Executioners of his Justice as he pleaseth, I am oft in doubt whether I should not have been more Passive and Silent than I was; Though not as Jeremy to Nebuchadnezzar, to perswade men to submit:

Yet to have forborn some sharp publick Preaching and Writing against them, too late, when they set themselves to promote Piety to ingra∣tiate their Usurpation. To disturb Possessors needeth a clear Call, when for what end soever they do that good, which men of better title will destroy.

XXXIII. When they commanded days of Prayer and Thanksgiving for their Wars in Scotland, &c. And when they imposed the EN∣GAGEMENT to be true to the Commonwealth as it was established without a King, and House of Lords, I repent not that I refused it, and wrote and preach'd against it: But I doubt whether I did well in overdoing herein: And had not waited more silently on God's Providence, till he had cleared my way.

XXXIV. I repented oft that I wrote the Book called Aphorisms of Justification and the Covenant: Not but that I think it sound Doctrine and useful: But it being my first, is defective in Method and in some words which should have been more clearly and cautelously exprest: And in my personal opposition to Dr. Owen's Errours, I should have considered what a temptation it would prove to the Passions of such a man (who yet grew more humble and orthodox before he died).

XXXV. Though my Conscience telleth me that the very many Books which I after wrote, were for the propagating and defending of needful Truth, and that I never trusted to any thing but Truth and Evi∣dence for Victory, yet I fear lest in many of them there be the faulti∣ness of some imprudent provoking words, and that I did not always sufficiently consider what mistaking men cannot bear, as well as what is congruous to the Matter and Cause. I still found it difficult to avoid too much Keenness, and yet not to wrong the Cause by dull pretence of Lenity.

XXXVI. Two things concurred to cause me to write my Political Aphorisms or Holy Common-wealth, of which I afterward repented.

1. James Harrington wrote his Oceana for a loose Popular Government, and Sir H. Vane was contriving another for a Military and Phanatick Democracy; both which I saw were utterly inconsistent with the Obli∣gations, Peace and Safety of the Land.

2. Sir Francis Nethersole sent purposely to me a Messenger to desire me to go to London to Cromwell, and perswade him to resign the Go∣vernment to King Ch. II. I answered him that Cromwell had been tryed therein by many, but would not so easily resign what he had got. He once admitted me to his Discourse, and before the Lord Broghil, Lambert and Thurloe, I urged him to tell us, what the People of England had done to forfeit their right to the Enjoyment of their ancient consti∣tuted Government, which they professed to be for and still desired? And all the answer that I could have was, that God had changed it by his Providence, the passages of which he talkt over near two hours, till

Lambert took on him to be asleep: for we must not interrupt him. Then Sir Francis sent me his Printed Books and some Papers, to have disputed over all the Case of the War: And not knowing how many such I might be put to answer, I thought best, in Print to tell him on what Grounds and Principles I had gone, not undertaking that I had not mistaken, but to desire him if I had erred to shew it by answering my Reasons there given. But before I could have his Answer, the distracted Armies had overturned all the present Government.

I repented Writing that Book, 1. Because it came out unseasonably too late.

2. Because in opposition to Harrington, I had pleaded for Monarchy, with some excess, and I wisht that I had not medled with Government, but left all to the Providence of God.

3. Because it did occasion more hurt than good: so that it became the common Theme of ambitious young Preachers, especially at Court, before K. Ch. II. as the way to Preferment, to talk against The Holy Commonwealth, falsly perswading men that by a Commonwealth I meant Democracy or Popular Government, which the Book was purposely written against. So that when the Oxford University burnt that Book (with Dr. Whitby's excellent Reconciler, and some others) though I ex∣postulated with the Vice-Chancellor concerning its Principles, I told them I consented that the Book was burnt: though I told them not why, as now I do.

XXXVII. Though both Nature and Grace inclined me to hate Lying, and specially in Writers and Preachers, and I honoured Jul. Caes. Scaliger the more, because his Son Joseph tells us how vehemently he hated a Lie, so that he could not be reconciled to a Liar, yet I confess that my impatience herein was faulty. It was long before I well perceived that the Father of Lies, doth Govern his Kingdom (most of the World) by meer Lying: Call it Errour, or Mistake, or Falshood, or what you will, all signifieth the same thing: It is delivering Falshood for Truth. Christ had told us that the Devil is the Father of Lies, and when he speaketh a Lie, he speaketh his own. Deceit is by Lying, and by this he ruleth his World. As God's Image consisteth in Life, Light and Love, the Devil's Image is Hatred. Falshood and Hurtfulness or Mur∣der, Joh. 8 But alas to take this for some strange thing, and to be over∣impatient with Liars, was my fault, when now I find it is but the very state of corrupt unreneved Nature: And Pride the Father, and Igno∣rance the Mother, make Kingdoms, Cities and Persons like a rotting Carkass that swarms with Maggots. You that read Histories, read with Judgment and due Suspicion; for the common corrupt Nature is a lying Nature: And it is not about Religion only; but the Fool rageth and is confident in all his Errours. O what abundance of Lying Books

are Shops and Libraries fill'd with, even in History and Theology! What abundance of false Counsels do Physicians give! what abundance of false accusations doth Envy and Malice vend? What abundance of false Doctrines and Censures doth ignorant Sectarian Zeal foment? How many Lies for one Truth is carried for News, or for Slander about the Streets? And how few scruple receiving and reporting them, & how fewer rebuke them? It's useful for the World to know how common this Malady is, but it was almost in despair that I lately wrote a Book a∣gainst it, of pretended Knowledge and Love) I blame not my self for hating it, but being too impatient with it; especially in Books and Prea∣chers, as if it had been a strange thing.

XXXVIII. When I wrote my five Disputations of Church Govern∣ment, I too hastily mis translated some words of Ignatius, and though I then owned Apostolick Successors in the continued part of their Work, I did not so fully as now understand, how Christ by Institution then founded a National Church, nor what a National Church was; nor how that which was ultimum in executione (a Christian Soveraignty) was primum in intentione, to which bare Preaching was preparatory.

XXXIX. When I wrote my Treatise of Episcopacy, I Calculated it to the Laudian Faction then prevalent, that called it self, the Church of England; and though I distinguished them that put down all the Pa∣rochial Pastors and Churches, and turned them all into meer Curates and Chappels (or partes Ecclesiarum infimarum) and so put down hun∣dreds of Bishops and Churches under pretence of magnifying One; from the old Reformed Church of England that put not down these, but on∣ly sinfully fettered them, yet I did not so largely open the difference as I ought, which gave Mr. Lobb occasion to write confidently for Sepa∣ration.

XL. When my Books against Conformity had irritated Dr. Stilling∣fleet to make me an instance of mischievous Separation (who had con∣stantly heard and communicated with my Parish Churches, and for my private or occasional Preaching had the Bishops Licence approved under the hands of two the greatest Lawyers of England (the Lord Chief Justice Sanders, and the now Lord Chief Justice Polix••en) I doubt that I too provokingly took the advantage of his temerity, and confuted him in too provoking terms, not considering enough that a Man of great Learning, Labour, and Merit, and Name, hath a great interest of Reputation which he would not be insensible of: And if it were true as many without proof report, that his exasperation engaged first Mr. Morrice, and after the second Author of the Mischief of Separation (whose writing against me is the transcript of the Character given by Christ, John 8. 44.) yet I honour the Reading, Learning, Labour and great Worth of Dr. Stillingfleet, now Bishop of Worcester, and what ever hand he had in it, I unfeignedly forgive him.

XLI. And in defence of the Nonconformists against the false accu∣sation of Shism laid on them by the Imposing Schismaticks, I doubt, I was too keen in confuting Mr. Sherlocke; I found it hard to discern whether the defence of truth and slandered suffering Servants of Christ, or not exasperating false Accusers should command my style.

XLII. What other Errors there are or have been in my Life or Wri∣tings, I daily beg of God to discover to me and pardon: For I never did any thing which might not and ought not to have been done better. Particularly I beg pardon for too frequent hastiness and harshness of Speech, to my nearest Domesticks, from whom I never differed one moment in point of Interest or Love; but had too often sour over∣hasty provoking words on trifling occasions.

XLIII. But all forementioned set together lye not half so heavy on my Soul, as my inward Deficience and Omission; That having had so ma∣ny Convictions of the truth of Scripture, and the certainty of the Life to come, and can scarce think of any thing but death and the future state, it is so sure and near, and have read, and heard, and written so much of the Love of God and of Heaven as I have done, it shameth, it grieveth me, it maketh me even abhor and loath my self, that I usu∣ally reach little higher than pacifick, quieting dull Affections, and that Faith, and Hope, and Love, do not keep me in more delightful thoughts of God and my Redeemer, and in a more joyful longing to be with Christ and all the Blessed; and that ever I should have a cold and common thought of God and things so high and holy, and that the prospect of my change, and the coming of Christ, is not a continual Feast to my Soul, and setteth me not more above the concerns of this vile and corruptible Flesh, and above all impatience of pain, and a∣bove the fears of Death and Corruption. O what a contradiction is there between that Head and Tongue that professeth to believe what I profess, of God, of Christ, of Endless Glory, and that Heart that no more rejoiceth in that Belief and Hope, but by languor and decay of Nature, (and doubtless great imperfection of Faith) is kept from that joy that such believing in reason should produce, and goeth to∣wards Heaven with so many pawses of fear or dulness, and so little of that Heavenly delight, which I have long been seeking of God, and which my low and weak condition needeth.

Lord, all my sins are known to thee, let me never be unwilling to know them, nor let them be so unknown to me as to invalidate my Re∣pentance, or frustrate my hope of pardon through Christ.

Notes

• * 1.1

  Said to be one Parker a Lawyer.
• * 1.2

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