Wits fittes and fancies Fronted and entermedled with presidentes of honour and wisdome. Also: Loves Ovvl. An idle conceited dialogue betwene loue, and an olde man. Recta securus. A. C.

OF BLINDNES.

A Poor mans eie was strooken out with a stone, & it hong only by a little string: Going presently to a Surgion to haue it put in againe, hee whiles the Surgion was busie about his preparatiues and trinkets, said vnto him: How think you (I pray) shall I loose my eye? No (answered the Surgion) for (behold) I haue it heer in my hand.

A Gentlewoman who was blind of one eie, her rude hus∣band call'd her euermore both in mirth and anger, blind Bus∣sard: Certaine strangers being at dinner with him on a time, a Gentleman of the company was also blinde of one eie, and he then calling his wife blind Bussard, adjoyn'd afterwardes to please the Gent. Sir, I meane not you, I meane the blind Bus∣sard my wife.

One endorc'd his letter to a blind-man thus:

To him that but by smelling knowes, Nor good, nor bad before his nose.

this bee deliuered.

A Schoole-maister raising vp his Schollers early in a mor∣ning, sayd vnto them: I hauing but one eie, can see to rise at breake a day, and you with each of you two eies, can scarse see day at noone.

A sand-blind Gallant praising himselfe to himselfe, and say∣ing: Faith (N.) thou hast a comelie personage, a passing faire wife, and the world at will, what wilt thou more? A wagge behind a door ouerhearing him, answered: Out with those eies.

A one-ey'd Iudge being partiall for the Plaintiffe, threate∣ned the defendant that vnlesse he held his peace, he would com∣mit him. The Defendant then casting his eye aside vnto the companie, said: Sirres, beare witnesse what an vntoward eye he castes vpon mee: I feare mee, he will adjudge me blind anon.

A blind-man married a faire wife: and on the marriage-day bee all to imbrac'd and kist her before all the companie: Shee

in modestie requested him to forbeare till night: hee answered: Nay (Mouse) all is night with mee.

A one-ey'd Gent. seru'd a verie browne Maistresse, who on a time being sullenly dispos'd, sore beflouted such his eyes de∣fect: and hee in reference to her swart complexion, answered: I pray, be not you like the Sable-Crowe, that still peckes at the eye. Take it interrogatiuely, and it sounds better.

A Country-man that had but one eye came to the Corne-market to buy wheate, and resting there against a poste with a great sacke on his shoulder: by chance an acquaintance of his came by, and seeing him, ask'd what price corne bare: hee an∣swered: Mee thinks they hold the bushell as deere as a mans eie: wherunto th'other reply'd: What make you heere then with so great a sack, seeing you are able to buy but one bushell?

A Captaine that had but one eye, saying vnto the Mar∣ques of Pescara: My Lord, it is now late within night: I pray giue mee leaue to goe sleepe an houre: The Marques in re∣ference that hee wanted an eye, answered: You haue slept one halfe already.

A Seruing-man hauing but one eie, came into a Fence-Schoole, and play'd with an other at fence, & it was his chance to haue th'other eie strooken out too: Hee then seeing himselfe all in dark, layd downe the foyles, and sayd vnto the company: My masters, God giue you all good night.

One that had but one eye, saying to an other: How say ye? will you play with me for an e••e? th'other answered? I, but how will you see to play and stake too?