The fountaine of selfe-loue. Or Cynthias reuels As it hath beene sundry times priuately acted in the Black-Friers by the Children of her Maiesties Chappell. Written by Ben: Iohnson.

SCENA. 4.

Criticus. Asotus. Amorphus.

Crit.

What? the well-dieted Amorphus become a Water-drinker? I see he meanes not to write verses then.

Asot.

No Criticus? why?

Crit.

Quia nulla placere diu▪ nec viuere carmina possunt, quae scri∣buntur aquae po••oribus.

Amor.

What say you to your Helicon?

Crit.

O, the Muses, well! that's euer excepted.

Amor.

Sir, your Muses haue no such water I assure you; your Nectar, or the Iuice of your Nepenthe is nothing to it; tis aboue your Metheglin, beleeue it.

Asot.

Metheglin! what's that Sir? may I be so Audacious to demaund?

Amo.

A kinde of Greeke Wine I haue met with Sir in my Trauailes: it is the same that Demosthenes vsually drunke, in the composure of all his exquisite and Mellifluous Orations.

Crit.

That's to be argued, (Amorphus) if wee may credit Lucian, who in his (Enicomium Demosthenis) affirmes, he neuer drunke but water in any of his Compositions.

Amo.

Lucian is absurde, he knew nothing: I will beleeue my owne Trauels, before all the Lucians of Europe; he doth feed you with fictions, and leasings.

Crit.

Indeed (I thinke) next a Traueller he do's prettily well.

Amo.

I assure you it was Wine, I haue tasted it, and from the hand of an Italian Antiquary, who deriues it authentical∣ly from the Duke of Ferrara's Bottles. How name you the Gentleman you are in ranke with there, Sir?

Crit.

Tis Asotus, sonne to the late deceased Philargyrus the Cittizen.

Amorphus.

Was his Father of any eminent place, or meanes?

Crit.

He was to haue bin Praetor next yeare.

Amo.

Ha! A pretty formall young Gallant (in good soothe) pitty, hee is not more gentilely propagated. Heark•• you Criticus: you may say to him what I am, if you please; though I affect not popularity, yet I would be lothe to stand out to any, whome you shall voutchsafe to call friend.

Crit.

Sir, I feare I may doe wrong to your sufficiencies in the reporting them, by forgetting or misplacing some one; your selfe can best enforme him of your selfe Sir, except you had some Catalogue or Inuentory of your faculties readye drawne, which you would request me to shew him for you, and him to take notice of.

Amo.

This Criti••us is sower: I will thinke Sir.

Crit.

Doe so Sir. O heauen, that any thing (in the likenesse of man) should suffer these rackt extremities, for the vttring of his Sophisticate good parts.

Asot.

Criticus, I haue a sute to you; but you must not de∣nie me: pray you make this Gentleman and I friends.

Crit.

Friends! Why? is there any difference betweene you?

Asotus.

No: I meane acquaintance, to knowe one ano∣ther.

Crit.

O now I apprehend you; your phrase was without me before.

Asot.

In good faith hee's a most excellent rare man I warrant him.

Crit.

Slight, they are mutually enamor'd by this time.

Asot.

Will you sweete Criticus?

Crit.

Yes, yes.

Asot.

Nay, but when? youle deferre it now, and forget it?

Crit.

Why, ist a thing of such present necessity, that it re∣quires so violent a dispatch?

Asot.

No, but (would I might neuer stir) hee's a most rauish∣ing man; good Criticus you shall endeare me to you, in good faith law.

Crit.

Well your longing shalbe satisfied Sir.

Asot.

And withall, you may tell him what my father was, and how well he left me, and that I am his heire.

Crit.

Leaue it to me, Ile forget none of your deare graces I warrant you.

Asot,

Nay I know you can better marshall these affaires then I can.—O Gods il'e giue all the world (if I had it) for aboun∣dance of such acquaintance.

Crit.

What ridiculous circumstance might I deuise now, to bestow this reciprocall brace of Cockscombes, one vpon ano∣ther?

Amor.

Since I troad on this side the Alpes, I was not so fro∣zen in my inuention; let me see: to accost him with some choise remnant of Spanish, or Italian? that would indifferently ex∣presse my languages now, mary then, if he should fall out to be Ignorant, it were both hard, and harshe. How else? step into some discourse of S••ate, and so make my induction? that were aboue him too; and out of his element I feare Faine to haue seen him in Venice? or Padua? or some face neare his in simillitude? tis too pointed, and open▪ No; it must be a more queint, & col∣laterall deuise: As—stay; to frame some encomiastique speach vpon this our Metropolis, or the wise Magistrates thereof, in which pollitique number, tis ods but his father fild vp a rome? descend into a perticuler admiration of their Iustice; for the due measuring of Coales, burning of Cans, and such like? As also their religion, in pulling downe a superstitious Crosse, and ad∣uancing a Venus; or Priapus, in place of it? ha? twill do well. Or to talke of some Hospitall, whose walls record his father a BE∣NEFACTOR? or of so many Buckets bestowd on his parish church in his life time, with his name at length (for want of armes) trickt vpon them; Any of these? or to praise the cleanesse of the streete wherein he dwelt, or the prouident painting of his posts against he should haue beene Pretor, or (leauing his parent) come to some speciall ornament about him selfe, as his Rapier, or some other of his accoutrements? I haue it: Thankes gra••ious Minerua.

Asot.

Would I had but once spoke to him, and then—

Amor.

Tis a most curious and neatly-wrought band this same, as I haue seene Sir.

Asot.

O God Sir.

Amor.

You forgiue the humor of mine eye in obseruing it?

Asot.

O Lord Sir, there needs no such Apology I assure you.

Crit.

I am anticipated: theyle make a solemne deede of guift of themselues you shall see.

Amor

Your Rose too do's most grace-fully in troath.

Asot.

Tis the most gentile and receiu'd Weare now Sir.

Amor.

Beleeue me Sir (I speake it not to humour you) I haue not seene a young gentleman (generally) put on his cloathes with more iudgement.

Asot.

O, tis your pleasure to say so, Sir.

Amor.

No, as I am vertuous (being altogether vntrauel'd) it strikes me into wonder.

Asot.

I do purpose to trauell (Sir) at Spring:

Amor.

I thinke I shall affect you sir, this last speach of yours hath begun to make you deare to me.

Asot.

O God Sir, I would there were anything in me Sir, that might appeare worthy the least worthines of your woorth Sir, I protest Sir, I should endeuour to shew it Sir, with more then common regarde Sir.

Crit.

O heres rare Motley, Sir.

Amor.

Both your desert, and your endeuors are plentifull, suspect them not: but your sweete disposition to trauaile (I assure you) hath made you another My-selfe in mine eye, and strooke me enamour'd on your beauties.

Asot.

I would I were the fairest Lady of Fraunce for your sake Sir, and yet I would trauaile too.

Amor▪

O you should digresse from your selfe els: for (beleeue it) your Trauaile is your onely thing that rectifies, or (as the Ita∣lian sayes) virendi pronto all' Attioni, makes you fit for Action.

Asot.

I thinke it be great charge though Sir.

Amor.

Charge? why tis nothing for a gentleman that goes priuate, as your selfe, or so; my Intelligence shall quitt my

charge at all times: Good faith this Hat hath possest mine eye exceedingly; tis so prettie, and fantastique; what? ist a Beauer.

Asot.

I Sir. Ile assure you tis a Beauer, it cost me six crownes but this morning.

Amor.

A very prettie fashion (beleeue me) and a most nouel kinde of trimme: your Button is conceipted too.

Asot.

Sir, it is all at your seruice.

Amor.

O pardon me.

Asot.

I beseech you Sir, if you please to weare it you shall do me a most infinite grace.

Crit.

Slight, will he be praisde out of his cloathes?

Asot.

By heauen Sir, I do not offer it you after the Italian manner; I would you should conceiue so of me.

Amor.

Sir, I shall feare to appeare rude in denying your cur∣te••ies, especially being inuited by so proper a distinction; may I pray your name Sir.

Asot.

My name is Asotus Sir.

Amor.

I take your loue (gentle Asotus) but let me winne you to receiue this in exchange.—

Crit.

'Hart, theile change dublets anone.

Amor.

And (from this time) esteeme your selfe in the first ranke of those few whom I professe to loue; what make you in company of this scholle•• here? I will bring you knowne to gallants as Anaides, Hedon the courtier, and others, whose so∣cietie shall render you grac'de, and respected; this is atriuiall fellow, too meane, too coarse for you to conuerse with.

Asot.

Slid, this is not worth a crowne, and minecost me six but this morning.

Crit.

I lookt when he would repent him, he ha's beg••nne to be sad a good while.

Amor.

Sir, shall I say to you for that Hat? be not so sad, be not so sad; tis a Relique I could not so easily haue departed with, but as the Hierogliphick of my affection; you shall alter it to what forme you please, it will take any block; I haue varied it my selfe to the three thousandth time, and not so few: It hath these vertues beside; your head shall not ak•• vnder it; nor

your braine leaue you, without licence; It will preserue your comple••ion to eternitie; for no beame of the Sunne (should you weare it vnder Zona Torrida) hath force to approch it by two ells. Tis proofe against thunder, and enchantment: and was giuen me by a great man (in Russia) as an especially-priz'd present; and constantly affirm'd to be the hat that acompanied the politique Vlisses, in his tedious, and ten yeares Trauailes.

Asot.

By Ioue I will not depart withall, whosoeuer woulde giue me a Million.