Apophthegmes new and old. Collected by the Right Honourable, Francis Lo. Verulam, Viscount St. Alban
Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626.
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Apophthegmes new and old.

IVlius Cae∣sar, did write a Collection of A∣pophthegmes, as appeares in an Epistle of Cicero. Page  2 I need say no more, for the worth, of a Writing, of that nature. It is pi∣tie his Booke is lost: for I ima∣gine, they were collected, with Iudgement, and Choice: where∣as that of Plu∣tarch,Page  3 and Sto∣baeus, and much more, the Mo∣derne ones, draw much of the dregs. Certain∣ly, they are of excellent vse. They are, Mu∣crones Verborum, Pointed Speeches. Cicero prettily Page  4 cals them, Sali∣nas, Salt pits; that you may extract salt out of, and sprinkle it, where you will. They serue, to be in∣terlaced, in con∣tinued Speech. They serue, to be recited, vpon occasiō of them∣selues. Page  5 They serue, if you take out the kernell of them, and make them your owne. I haue, for my recreati∣on, in my sick∣nesse, fann'd the Old; Not omit∣ting any, because they are vulgar; Page  6 (for many vul∣gar ones are ex∣cellent good;) Nor for the meannesse of the Person; but be∣cause they are dull, and flat: And added ma∣ny New, that o∣therwise would haue died.

Page  7 1. WHEN Queene Elizabeth had aduanced Ralegh, she was one day playing on the virginalls, and my Lo. of Oxford, & another Noble-man, stood by. It fell out so, that the Ledge, be∣fore the Iacks, was ta∣ken away, so as the Iacks were seene: My Lo. of Oxford, and the other Noble-man Page  8 smiled, and a little whispered: The Queene marked it, and would needes know, What the mat∣ter was? My Lo. of Oxford answered; That they smiled, to see, that when Iacks went vp, Heads went downe.

2. Henrie the fourth of France, his Queene was great with Childe. Count Soi•…∣ons, Page  9 that had his ex∣pectation vpon the Crowne; when it was twice or thrice thought, that the Queene was with Childe before, said to fome of his Frends; That it was but with a pillow. This had some wayes come to the Kings eare, who kept it til when the Queen waxed great; call'd the Count of Soissons to Page  10 him, and said, laying his hand vpon the Queenes belly; Come Cousin, it is no pillow. Yes, Sir, (answered the Count of Soiss∣ons) it is a pillow, for all France to sleepe vpon.

3. There was a con∣ference in Parliament, betweene the Vpper House, & the Lower, about a Bill of Ac∣countants, Page  11 which came downe, from the Lords, to the Commons: which Bill prayed, that the Lands of Ac∣countants, whereof they were seized, when they entred vpon their Office, mought bee liable to their Arreares, to the Queene. But the Commons desired, that the Bill mought Page  12 not looke backe, to Accountants that were alreadie, but ex∣tend onely to Ac∣countanes hereafter. But the Lo. Threasu∣rer said: Why, I pray, if you had lost your purse, by the waie, would you looke for∣wards, or would you looke backe? The Queene hath lost her purse.

Page  13 4. Queene Elizabeth, the morrow of her Coronation, went to the Chappell; and in the great chamber, Sir Iohn Rainsford, set on by wiser Men, (A Knight that had the libertie of a Buf∣fone) besought the Queene aloud; That now, this good time, when prisoners were deliuered, foure priso∣ners, amongst the rest,Page  14mought likewise haue their libertie, who were like enough, to bee kept still in hold. The Queene asked; Who they were? And hee said; Matthew, Mark, Luke, & Iohn; who had long beene imprisoned, in the Latine tongue; and now he defired, they mought goe abroad, a∣mong the people, in En∣glish. The Queene answered, with a Page  15 graue countenance; It were good (Rains∣ford) they were spoken with themselues, to know of them, whether they would be set at li∣bertie?

5. The Lo. Keeper, Sir Nicholas Bacon, was asked his opini∣on, by Queene Eliza∣beth, of one of these Monopoly Licences; And hee answered; Page  16Will you haue me speake truth, Madame? Licen∣tiâ omnes deteriores su∣mus. Wee are all the worse for a Licence.

6. Pace, the bitter Foole, was not suffe∣red to come at the Queene, because of his bitter humor. Yet at one time, some per∣swaded the Queene, that hee should come to her, vndertaking Page  17 for him, that hee should keepe com∣passe. So hee was brought to her, and the Queene said; Come on Pace, now we shall beare of our faults. Saith Pace; I doe not vse to talke of that, that all the Towne talkes of.

7. My Lo. of Essex, at the succor of Rhoan, made 24. Knights; Page  18 which at that time was a great matter. Diuerse of those Gen∣tle-men, were of weake and small meanes; which when Queene Elizabeth heard, shee said; My Lo. mought haue done well, to haue built his Almes-House, before he made his Knights.

8. A great Officer in France, was in dan∣ger Page  19 to haue lost his place. But his wife, by her suite, and means making, made his peace: whereup∣on a pleasant Fellow said; That he had been crushed, but that he sa∣ued himselfe vpon his hornes.

9. Queene Anne Bul∣len, at the time, when she was led to bee be∣headed, in the Tower, Page  20 called one of the Kings Priuie Cham∣ber to her, and said to him; Commend mee to the King, and tell him, he is constant in his course of aduan∣cing me. From a pri∣uate Gentle-woman, he made me a Marquisse; and from a Marquisse, a Queene; and now he had left no higher degree of earthly honour, hee hath made me a Martyr.

Page  21 10. Bishop Latimer said, in a Sermon, at Court; That hee heard great speech, that the King was poore, and many waies were propounded to make him rich: For his part, he had thought of one way, which was; That they should helpe the King to some good office, for all his Offi∣cers were rich.

11. Caesar Borgia, after Page  22 long diuision, be∣tweene him and the Lords of Romagna, fell to accord with them. In this accord, there was an Article, that hee should not call them, at any time, all together, in per∣son: The meaning was, that knowing his dangerous nature If hee meant them treason, some one mought be free, to re∣uenge Page  23 the rest. Ne∣uerthelesse, hee did with such art, and faire vsage, win their confidence, that hee brought them all to∣gether to Counsell at Sinigalia, where hee mur•…her'd them all. This Act, when it was related vnto Pope Alexander his Father, by a Cardi∣nall, as a thing happy, but verie persidious, Page  24 the Pope said; It was they, that had broke their Couenant first, in comming all together.

12. Pope Iulius the third, when hee was made Pope, gaue his Hat vnto a youth, a Fauourite of his, with great scandall. Wher∣upon, at one time a Cardinall, tha•… mought bee fre•… with him, said mo∣destly Page  25 to him; What did your Holinesse see in that young man, to make him Cardinall? Iulius answered, What did you see in mee, to make me Pope?

13. The same Iulius, vpon like occasion of speech, why hee should beare so great affection to the same young Man, would say; That he had foundPage  26by Astrologie, that it was the youths Desti∣nie, to be a Great Pre∣late; which was im∣possible, except himselfe were Pope; And there∣fore, that hee did raise him, as the Driuer on of his owne Fortune.

14 Sir Thomas Moore had onely Daughters, at the first; And his Wife did euer pray for a Boy: At last hee Page  27 had a Boy; which af∣ter, at Mans yeeres, proued simple. Sir Thomas said to his Wife; Thou prayedst so long for a Boy, that hee will bee a Boy, as long as he liues.

15. Sir Thomas Moore, the day he was behea∣ded, had a Barber sent to him, because his haire was long, which was thought, would Page  28 make him more com∣miserable, with the people. The Barber came to him, and as∣ked him; Whether he would be pleased to bee trimm'd? In good faith honest fellow, (said Sir Thomas) the King and I haue a suit for my Head, and till the Title be cleared, I will doe no cost vpon it.

16. Stephen Gardiner Page  29 Bishop of Winchester, a great Champion of the Papists, was wont to say of the Prote∣stants, who ground vpon the Scripture; That they were like Poasts, that bring truth in their Letters, and lies in their Mouths.

17. The Lacedemoni∣ans were besieged by the Athenians, in the Fort of Peile; which Page  30 was won, and some slaine, and some ta∣ken. There was one said, to one of them that was taken, by way of scorne; Wer•… not they braue men, tha•… lost their liues at th•… Fort of Peile? He answered; Certainely a Persian Arrow 〈◊〉 much to be set by, if it can chuse out a bra•… Man.

Page  31 18. After the Defeat of Cyrus the younger, Falinus was sent, by the King, to the Gre∣cians, (who had, for their part, rather Vi∣ctorie, than other∣wise,) to command them, to yeeld their Armes. Which when it was denied, Fali∣nus said to Clearchus; Well then, the King lets you know, that if you remoue from thePage  32place, where you are now encamped, it is warre; if you stay, it is Truce; What shall I say, you will doe? Cle∣archus answered; It pleaseth vs, as pleaseth the King. How is that? saith Falinus. Saith Clearchus; If we re∣moue, Warre; if wee stay, Truce. And so would not disclose his purpose.

Page  33 19. Clodius was acquit by a corrupt Iurie, that had palpably ta∣ken shares of money. Before they gaue vp their verdict, they prayed of the Senate a Guard, that they might doe their Consciences freely; for Clodius was a ve∣rie seditious young Noble-man. Where∣upon, all the world gaue him for con∣demn'd. Page  34 But acquit∣ted he was. Catulus the next day, seeing some of them, tha•… had acquitted him together, said to them; What made yo•… to aske of vs a Guard Were you afraid you money should haue bee•… taken from you?

20. At the same Iudge∣ment, Cicero gaue i•… Euidence vpon oath Page  35 And the Iurie (which consisted of 57.) pas∣sed against his Eui∣dence. One day in the Senate, Cicero and Clodius being in altercation, Clodius vpbraided him, and said; The Iurie gaue you no credit. Cicero answered; Fiue and twentie gaue mee cre∣dit; but there were two and thirtie, that gaue you no credit, forPage  36they had their money aforehand.

21. Many men, especi∣ally such as affect gra∣uitie, haue a manner, after other mens speech, to shake their heads. Sir Lionell Cranfield would say; That it was, as Men shake a Bottle, to see if there were any wit in their Head, or no.

Page  37 22. Sir Thomas Moore, who was a man, in all his life time, that had an excellent •…eine in jesting) at •…he verie instant of •…s Death, hauing a •…cttie long Beard, af∣•…er his Head was vp∣on the Blocke, lift it vp againe, and gently •…rew his Beard aside, •…nd said; This hath •…ot offended the King

Page  38 23. Sir Thomas Moore had sent him, by a Su∣ter in the Chancerie, two siluer Flagons. When they were pre∣sented by the Gentle∣mans seruant, he said to one of his Men; Haue him to the Cellar and let him haue of my best wine. And tur∣ning to the Seruant said; Tell thy Master Frend, if he like it, le•… him not spare it.

Page  39 24. Diogenes hauing seene that the King∣dome of Macedon, which before was contemptible & low, began to come aloft, when hee died, was asked; How he would be buried? He answe∣red; With my face downeward; for within a while, the world will bee turned vpside downe, and then I shall lie right.

Page  [unnumbered] 25. Cato the Elder was wont to say; That the Romans were like sheepe: A man were better driue a flocke of them, then one of them.

26. Themistocles, in his lower Fortune, was in loue with a young Gentle-man, who scorn'd him. When hee grew to his Greatnesse, which was soone after, hee Page  41 sought to him: But Themistocles said; Wee are both growne wise, but too late.

27. Demonax the Phi∣losopher, when hee died, was asked tou∣ching his buriall. He answered, Neuer take care for burying mee, for stinke will burie me. He that askt him, said againe; Why, would you haue yourPage  42bodie left to Dogs and Rauens to feed vpon? Demonax answered; Why, what great hurt is it, if hauing sought to doe good, when I liued, to Men; my bodie doe some good to beasts, when I am dead?

28. Iack Roberts was desired by his Tay∣lour, when the recko∣ning grew somewhat high, to haue a Bill of Page  43 his hand. Roberts said; I am content, but you must let no man know it. When the Taylor brought him the Bill, he tore•…t it, as in choller, and said to him; You vse me not well; you promised me no bodie should know it, and here you haue put in; Be it knowne to all men by these presents.

29. When Lycurgus Page  44 was to reforme and alter the state of Spar∣ta, in the Consultati∣on, one aduised, That it should bee reduced to an absolute Popu∣lar Equalitie. But Ly∣curgus said to him; Sir, beginne it in your owne House.

30. Phocyon, the A∣thenian, (a Man of great seueritie, and no wayes flexible to the Page  45 will of the People) one day, when hee spake to the People, in one part of his speech, was applau∣ded: Whereupon, he turned to one of his Frends, and asked; What haue I said a∣misse?

31. Sir Walter Ralegh was wont to say, of the Ladies of Queene Elizabeths Priuie-Chamber, Page  46 and Bed-Chamber; That they were like Witches; they could doe hurt, but they could doe no good.

32. Bion, that was an Atheist, was shewed in a Port-Citie, in a Temple of Neptune, many Tables or Pi∣ctures, of such, as had in tempests, made their vowes to Nep∣tune, and were saued Page  47 from shipwrack; and was askt; How say you now, doe you not acknowledge the power of the Gods? But hee said; Yes, but where are they painted, that haue beene drown'd after their vowes?

33. Bias was sailing, and there fell out a great Tempest, and the Mariners, that were wicked and dis∣solute Page  48 Fellowes, cal∣led vpon the Gods But Bias said to them; Peace, let them not know yee are here.

34. Bion was wont to say; That Socrates, of all the louers of Alcibia∣des, onely held him by the eares.

35. There was a Mi∣nister depriued for Inconformitie: who Page  49 said to some of his Frends; That if they depriued him, it should cost an hundred Mens liues. The Partie vn∣derstood it, as if, being a turbulent Fellow, hee would haue mo∣ued sedition, and complain'd of him. Whereupon, being conuented, and appo sed vpon that speech, he said; His meaning was, that if hee lost hisPage  50Benefice, hee would practise Physicke; and then hee thought hee should kill an hundred Men, in time.

36. Michael Angelo, the famous Painter, painting in the Popes Chappell, the Por∣traiture of Hell, and damned Soules, made one of the damned Soules so like a Cardi∣nall, that was his ene∣mie, Page  51 as euerie bodie, at first sight, knew it: Whereupon the Car∣dinall complained to Pope Clement, desi∣ring it might be defa∣ced; who said to him; Why, you know verie well, I haue power to deliuer a soule out of Purgatorie, but not out of Hell.

37. There was a Phi∣losopher about Tibe∣rius, Page  52 that looking into the nature of Caius, said of him; That hee was Mire mingled with Bloud.

38. Alcibiades came to Pericles, and stayed a while, ere hee was admitted. When he came in, Pericles ci∣uilly excused it, and said; I was studying, how to giue my account. But Alcibiades said Page  53 to him; If you will be ruled by mee, studie ra∣ther, how to giue no ac∣count.

39. Cicero was at din∣ner, where there was an ancient Ladie, that spake of her yeeres, and said; She was but fortie yeeres old. One that sate by Cicero, rounded him in the care, and said; Shee talkes of fortie yeeresPage  54old, and shee is farre more, out of question Cicero answered him againe; I must beleeue her, for I haue heard her say so, any time, these ten yeeres.

40. Pope Adrian the sixth wastalking with the Duke of Sesa, That Pasquill gaue great scandall, and that hee would haue him throwen into the riuer.Page  55 But Sesa answered; Doe it not (holy Fa∣ther) for then hee will turne Frogge; and whereas now hee chaunts but by day, hee will then chaunt both by day and night.

41. There was a Soul∣dier, that vaunted be∣fore Iulius Caesar, of hurts he had receiued in his face. Iulius Caesar knowing him Page  56 bee a Coward, told him; You were best take beed, next time you r•…nne away, how you looke backe.

42. There was a Bi∣shop, that was some∣what a delicate Per∣son, and bathed twice a day. A Frend of his said to him; My Lord, why doe you bath twice a day? The Bishop answered; Because IPage  57cannot conueniently bath thrice.

43. Mendoza, that was Vice-Roy of Peru, was wont to say; That the Gouernment of Peru, was the best place that the King of Spaine gaue, saue that it was somewhat too neere Madrid.

44. Secretarie Bournes sonne kept a Gentle∣mans Page  58 Wife in Shrop∣shire, who liued from her Husband with him. When hee was wearie of her, he cau∣sed her Husband to be dealt with, to take her home, and offered him 500. pounds for reparation. The Gen∣tle-man went to Sir Henry Sidney, to take his aduice vpon this offer; telling him; That his wife promisedPage  59now a new life; and to tell him truth, 500. pounds would come well with him; and be∣sides, that sometimes he wanted a woman in his bed. By my troth, (said Sir Henry Sid∣ney) take her home, and take the money, and then, wheras other Cuc∣kolds weare their hornes plaine, you may weare yours gilt.

Page  60 45. There was a Gen∣tle-man in Italy, that wrate to a great Frend of his, vpon his Ad∣uancement to bee Cardinall; That hee was verie glad of his aduancement, for the Cardinalls owne sake: but he was sorrie, that himselfe had lost so good a Frend.

46. When Rablais lay on his Death bed, and Page  61 they gaue him the Ex∣treme Vnction, a fa∣miliar Frend of his came to him after∣wards, and asked him; How hee did? Rablais answered; Euen going my jour∣ney, they haue greased my boots already.

47. There was a King of Hungarie tooke a Bishop in battell, and kept him prisoner. Page  62 Whereupon the Pope writ a Monitorie to him, for that hee had brokē the Priuiledge of Holy Church, and taken his Sonne. The King sent an Embas∣sage to him, and sen•… withall the Armour, wherein the Bishop was taken, and this onely in writing Vide, num haec sit ve∣stis filij t•…?

Page  63 48. There was a Su∣tour to Vespasian, who to lay his Sute fairer, said; It was for his Brother: whereas indeed it was for a peece of money. Some about Vespasi∣an, to crosse him, told the Emperour, That the Partie, his Seruant spake for, was not his Brother, but that it was vpon a bargaine. Ve∣spasian se•…t for the Page  64 Partie interessed, and asked him; Whether his Meane was his Bro∣ther, or no? He durst not tell vntruth to the Emperour, and confessed; That he•… was not his Brother Whereupon, the Em∣perour said; This doe fetch me the money, and you shall haue your sut•… dispatched. Which h•… did. The Courtier which was the. Page  65 Meane, sollicited Ve∣spasian, soone after, about his Sute: Why (saith Vespasian) I gaue it, last day, to a Brother of mine.

49. When Vespasian passed from Iurie, to take vpon him the Empire, hee went by Alexandria, where re∣mained two famous Philosophers, Apol∣lonius, & Euphrates. Page  66 The Emperour heard them discourse, tou∣ching matter of State, in the presence of many. And when hee was wearie of them, hee brake off, and in a secret derisi∣on, finding their Dis∣courses but Specula∣tiue, and not to be•… put in practise, said; Oh, that I might go∣uerne wise men, and wise men gouerne me.

Page  67 50. Cardinall Xime∣nes, vpon a muster which was taken against the Moores, was spoken to by a Seruant of his, to stand a little out of the smoake of the Harquebuze: But he said againe; That that was his Incense.

51. Vespasian askt of Apollonius; What was the cause of Nero'sPage  68ruine? who answe∣red; Nero could tune the Harpe well; but in Gouernment, hee did alwayes winde vp the strings too high, or let them downe too low.

52. Mr. Bromley Solli∣citour, giuing in Eui∣dence for a Deed which was impea∣ched to bee fraudu∣lent, was vrged by the Counsell on the other Page  69 side, with this pre∣sumption: That in two former suites, when Title was made, that Deed was passed ouer in silence, and some other Con∣ueyance stood vpon. Mr. Iustice Catyline, taking in with that side, asked the Solli∣citour; I pray thee, Mr. Sollicitour, let mee aske you a familiar question: I haue two Geldings inPage  70my stable, and I haue diuerse times businesse of importance, and still I send forth one of my Geldings, and not the other; would you not thinke I set him aside for a Iade? No, my Lord, (saith Bromley) I would thinke you spa∣red him for your owne saddle.

53. Alonso Cartillio was informed by his Page  71 Steward, of the great∣nesse of his expence, being such as hee could not hold out with. The Bishop as∣ked him; Wherein it chiefly rose? His Steward told him; In the multitude of his seruants. The Bishop bade him make a note of those that were necessarie, and those that mought be put off. Which hee Page  72 did. And the Bishop taking occasion to reade it, before most of his seruants, said to his Steward; Well, let these remaine, because I need them; and these other, because they need mee.

54. Queene Elizabeth was wont to say vp∣on the Commission of Sales; That the Commissioners vsedPage  73her like strawberrie wiues, that laid two or threo great strawber∣ries at the mouth of their pot, and all the rest were little ones: So they made her two or three good prices of the first particulars, but fell straight-wayes.

55. Queene Elizabeth was wont to say of her instructions to great Officers; ThatPage  74they were like to gar∣ments, straight at the first putting on, but did by and by weare loose enough.

56. Mr. Marburie the Preacher would say; That God was faine to deale with wicked men, as men do with frisking jades in a pasture, that cannot take them vp, till they get them at a gate: So wicked menPage  75will not bee taken vp, till the boure of death.

57. Thales, as he lookt vpon the starres, fell into the water: Whereupon, it was after said; That if hee had lookt into the wa∣ter, he might haue seene the starres; but loo∣king vp to the starres, hee could not see the water.

Page  76 58. The Booke of De∣posing Richard the second, and the com∣ming in of Henrie the fourth, supposed to bee written by Dr. Hayward, who was committed to the Tower for it, had much incensed Q. E∣lizabeth. And she as∣ked Mr. Bacon, being then of her learned Counsell; Whether there were no treasonPage  77contained in it? Mr. Bacon intending to doe him a pleasure, and to take off the Queenes bitternesse with a jest, answered; No Madam, for trea∣son, I cannot deliuer opinion, that there is any, but verie much fe∣lonie. The Queene apprehending it glad∣ly, asked; How, and wherein? Mr. Bacon answered; BecausePage  78he had stollen many of his sentences and con∣ceits, out of Cornelius Tacitus.

59. Mr. Popham, when hee was Speaker, and the Lower House had sate long, and done in effect nothing; com∣ming one day to Queene Elizabeth, she said to him; Now, Mr. Speaker, what hath passed in the LowerPage  79House? He answered; If it please your Maie∣stie, seuen weekes.

60. Pope Xystus the fifth, who was a pooremansson, & his fathers house ill-that∣ched, so that the Sunne came in, in ma∣ny places, would sport with his ignobilitie, & say; He was, Nato di Casa illustre: Sonne of an illustrious House.

Page  80 61. When the King of Spaine conquered Portugall, hee gaue speciall charge to his Lieutenant, that the Souldiers should not spoile, lest hee should alienate the hearts of the people. The Ar∣mie also suffered much scarsitie of vi∣ctuall. Whereupon, the Spanish Souldi∣ers would afterwards say: That they had wonPage  81the King a Kingdome, •…s the Kingdome of Heauen vseth to bee wonne; 〈◊〉 fasting, and abstainning from tha•…, that is another mans.

62. Cicero married his Daughter to Dola∣bella; th•… hold Cae∣sars pattie: Pompey had married Iulia, •…at wa•… Caesars Daughter. After, whē Caesar and Pompey Page  82 tooke Armes one a∣gainst the other; and Pompey had passed the seas, and Caesar possessed Italy, Cice∣ro stay'd somewhat long in Italy, but at last sailed ouer to ioyne with Pompey: who when hee came vnto him, Pompey said; You are welcome; but where left you your Sonne in Law? Cicero answered; Page  83With your Father in law.

63. Nero was wont to say of his Master Se∣neca; That his stile was like mortar of sand without lime.

64. Sir Henrie Wotton vsed to say; That Crit∣ticks are like Brushers of Noble-mens cloaths.

65. Queene Elizabeth, Page  84 being to resolue vpon a great Officer, and being by some, that canuassed for others, put in some doubt of that person, whō she meant to aduance, called for Mr. Bacon, and told him; Shee was like one with a lan∣thorne, seeking a man: and seemed vnsaris∣fied, in the choyce she had of men for that place. Mr. Bacon an∣swered Page  85 her; That hee had heard, that in old time, there was vsually painted on the Church walls, the Day of Doome, and God sitting in judgement, and Saint Michael by him, with apaire, of ballance, and the soule, and the good deeds in the one bal∣lance, and the faults and the euill deeds in the other; and the soules ballance wentPage  86vp farre too light: Then was our Ladie painted with a great paire of beads, casting them into the light bal∣lance, to make vp the weight: So (hee said) place and authoritie, which were in her hands to giue, were like our Ladies beads, which though Men, through diuerse imper∣fections, were too light before, yet when theyPage  87were cast in, made weight competent.

66. Mr. Sauill was as∣ked, by my Lo. of Essex, his opinion touching Poets; who answered my Lo. He thought them the best writers, next to those that write prose.

67. Mr. Mason of Tri∣nitie Colledge, sent his Pupill to another Page  88 of the Fellowes, to borrow a booke of him: who told him; I am loth to lend my bookes out of my cham∣ber; but if it please thy Tutour, to come and reade vpon it in my chamber, hee shall, as long as he will. It was Winter: and some dayes after, the same Fellow sent to Mr. •…son, to borrow his bellowes. But Mr. Page  89 Mason said to his Pu∣pill; I am loth to lend my bellowes out of my chamber; but if thy Tutor would come, and blow the fire in my chamber, hee shall, as long as he will.

68. Nero did cut a youth, as if he would haue transformed him into a woman, & call'd him Wife. There was a Senator Page  90 of Rome, that said se∣cretly to his Frend; It was pittie Nero's fa∣ther had not such a wife.

69. Galba succeeded Nero, and his age be∣ing much despised, there was much li∣cence and confusion in Rome. Where∣upon, a Senatour said in full Senate; It were better liue where no∣thingPage  91is lawfull, then where all things are lawfull.

70. In Flaunders, by accident, a Flemmish Tiler, fell from the top of a house vpon a Spaniard, and killed him, though he esca∣ped himselfe. The next of the bloud pro∣secuted his death with great violence against the Tiler. Page  92 And when hee was offered pecuniarie re∣compence, nothing would serue him, but Lex Talionis. Where∣upon the Iudge said to him; That if hee did vrge that kinde of sentence, it must bee, that hee should goe vp to the top of the house, and thence fall downe vpon the Tiler.

71. Queene Elizabeth Page  93 was dilatorie enough in sutes, of her owne nature: And the Lo. Threasurer Burleigh, to feed her humour, would say to her; Madam, you doe well to let Suters stay; for I shall tell you, Bis dat, qui citò dat; If you grant them speedily, they will come againe the sooner.

72. They faigne a tale Page  94 of Sixtus Quintus, that after his death he went to Hell; And the Porter of Hell said to him; You haue some reason to offer your selfe to this place; but yet I haue order not to receiue you: you haue a place of your owne, Purgatorie, you may goe thither. So he went away, & sought Purgatorie a great while, & could finde Page  95 no such place. Vpon that hee tooke heart, and went to Heau•… and knocked, and 〈◊〉 Peter asked; Who w•… there? He said; Six∣tus Pope. Whereunto St. Peter said; Why doe you knocke? you haue the keyes. Sixtus answered; It is true, but it is so long since they were giuen, as I doubt the wards of the locke be altred.

Page  96 73. Charles King of Swede, a great ene∣mie of the Iesuites, when hee tooke any of their Colledges, he would hang the old Iesuites, and put the young to his Mines, saying; That since they wrought so hard aboue ground, he would trie how they could worke vnderground.

74. In Chancerie, one Page  97 time, when the Coun∣sell of the Parties set forth the Bundaries of the land in questi∣on, by the Plot: And the Counsell of oue part sayd; Wee lie on this side, my Lo. And the Counsell on the other part said; Wee lie on this side: The Lo. Chanceller Hat∣ton stood vp, and said; If you lie on both sides, whom willPage  98you haue mee to be∣leeue?

75. Vespasian, and Ti∣tus his eldest Sonne, were both absent from Rome, when the Empire was cast vpon him. Domitian his younger Sonne was at Rome, who tooke vpon him the Affaires: And being of a turbulent spirit, made many changes, Page  99 and displaced diuerse Officers, and Gouer∣nours of Prouinces, sending them Succes∣sours: So when Ve∣spasian came to Rome, and Domitian came into his pre∣sence, Vespasian said to him; Sonne, I looked when you would haue sent me a Successour.

76. Sir Amice Pawlet, when hee saw too Page  100 much haste made in any matter, was wont to say; Stay a while, that wee may make an end the sooner.

77. The Deputies of the reformed Religi∣on, after the Massacre, which was vpon St. Bartholomewes day, treated with the King and Queene-Mother, and some other of the Counsell, for a peace. Page  101 Both sides were a∣greed vpon the Arti∣cles. The Question was, vpon the secu∣ritie of performance. After some particu∣lars propounded and reiected, the Queene-Mother said; Why, is not the word of a King sufficient securitie? One of the Deputies answered; No, by St. Bartholomew, Madam.

Page  102 78. When the Arch-Duke did raise his siege from Graue, the then Secretarie came to Queene Elizabeth; and the Queene ha∣uing intelligence first, said to the Secretarie; Wote you what? The Arch-Duke is risen from the Graue. Hee answered; What without the Trumpet of the Archangell? The Queene replyed; Page  103Yes, without sound of Trumpet.

79. Francis the first, v∣sed for his pleasure, sometimes to goe dis∣guised. So walking one day, in the com∣panie of the Cardinall of Borbon, neere Pa∣ris, hee met a Peasant, with a new paire of shooes vpon his arme. So hee call'd him to him, and said; Page  104By our Ladie, these bee good shooes, what did they cost thee? The Peasant said; Guesse. The King said; I thinke some fiue Souls. Saith the Peasant; You haue lied but a Carolois. What Vil∣laine (saith the Car∣dinall of Burbon) thou art dead: It is the King. The Pea∣sant replyed; The Deuill take him, of youPage  105and mee, that knew so much.

80. There was a con∣spiracie against the Emperour Claudius, by Scribonianus, ex∣amined in the Senate; where Claudius sa•… in his chaire, and one of his Freed-Seruants stood at the backe of his chaire. In the ex∣amination, that Freed Seruant, who had Page  106 much power with Claudius, verie saucily had almost all the words; and amongst other things, he asked in scorne, one of the Examinats, who was likewise Freed Ser∣uant of Scribonia∣nus; I pray, Sir, if Scribonianus had beene Emperour, what would you haue done? Hee answered; I would haue stood behinde hisPage  107chaire, and held my peace.

81. Dionysius the Ty∣rant, after he was de∣posed, and brought to Corinth, kept a schoole. Many vsed to visit him, and a∣mongst others, one, when hee came in, opened his mantle, and shooke his cloathes, thinking to giue Dionysius a gen∣tle Page  108 scorne; because it was the manner to doe so, for them that came in to him, while he was Tyrant. But Dionysius said to him; I pray thee doe so rather when thou goest out, that wee may see thou stealest nothing away.

82. Hannibal said of Fabius Maximus, and of Marcellus (whereof Page  109 the Former waited vpon him, that hee could make no pro∣gresse; and the Latter had many sharpe fights with him;) That he feared Fabius, like a Tutour; and Marcellus, like an Enemie.

83. Diogenes, one ter∣rible frostie morning, came into the Market Place, and stood na∣ked Page  [unnumbered] quaking, to shew his Tollerancie. Ma∣ny of the people came about him, pittying him. Plato passing by, and knowing hee did it to be seene, said to the people, as hee went by; If you pittie him indeed, leaue him alone.

84. Sackford, Master of the Requests to Queen Elizabeth, had Page  111 diuerse times moued for audience, & been put off. At last hee came to the Queene in a progresse, and had on a new paire of boots. When hee came in, the Queene said to him; Fie Slo∣uen, thy new Boots stinke. Madam, (said he) it is not my new Boots that stinke, but it is the stale Bills that I haue kept so long.

Page  112 85. One was saying; That his great Grand∣father, and Grand fa∣ther, and Father, died at sea. Said another that heard him; And I were as you, I would neuer come at Sea. Why (saith hee) where did your great Grand-fa∣ther, & Grand-father, and Father die? Hee answered; Where, but in their Beds? Saith the other; And IPage  113were as you, I would •…er come in Bed.

86. Arist ppus was 〈◊〉 Suiter to Diony∣sius, for somewhat, who would giue no eare to his Suit. Ari∣stippus fell at his feet: Then Dionysius gra ted it. One that stood by, said afterwards to Aristippus; You a Philosopher, and to bee sabase, as to throw yourPage  114selfe at the Tyrants feet, to get a Suit? Aristip∣pus answered; The fault is not mine, but the fault is in Diony∣sius, that carries his cares in his feet.

87. There was a young man in Rome, that was verie like Augu∣stus Caesar Augustus tooke knowledge of it, and •…enr for the Man, and asked him; Page  115Was your Mother ne∣uer at Rome? Hee answered; No, Sir, but my Father was.

88. A Physician adui∣sed his Patient, that had sore eyes, that hee should abstaine from wine. But the Patient said; I thinke rather, Sir, from wine and water; for I haue aften marked it; in bleare eyes, and I haue seenePage  116water come forth, but neuer wine.

89. When Sir Thomas Moore was Lo. Chan∣celler, hee did vse, at Masse, to sit in the Chancell; and his Ladie in a Pew. And because the Pew stood out of sight, his Gentleman-Vsher, e∣uer after Seruice, came to the Ladies Pew, and said; Ma∣dam,Page  117my Lo. is gone. So when the Chan∣cellers place was ta∣ken from him, the next time they went to Church, Sir Tho∣mas himselfe came to his Ladies Pew, and said; Madam, my Lo. is gone.

90. At an Act of the Commencement, the Answerer gaue for his Question; ThatPage  118an Aristoaracie was better then a Monar∣chie. The Replyer, who was a dissolute Fellow, did tax him; That being a priuate bred Man, bee would giue a Question of State. The Answerer said; That the Replyer did much wrong the priuiledg•… of Seh•…ers; who would bee much 〈◊〉 if they should giue QuestionsPage  119of nothing, but such things wherein they are practised. And ad∣ded; Wee haue heard your selfe dispute of vertue, which no man will say, you put much its practise.

91. There was a di∣spute, whether great heads or little heads had the better wit? And one said; It must needs be the little.Page  120For it is a Maxime: Omne maius continet in se minus.

92. Solon, when hee wept for his Sonnes death, and one said to him; Weeping will not helpe: answered, A•…s, therfore I weepe, because weeping will not helpe.

93. Solon being asked; Whether bee had giuenPage  121the Athenians the best Lawes? answered; Yes, the best of those that they would haue receiued.

94. One said to Aristip∣pus; It is a strange thing, why should men rather giue to the poore, then to Philosophers. Hee ansvvered; Be∣cause, they thinke themselues may soo∣ner come to beePage  122poore, then to be Philo∣sophers.

95. Alexander vsed to say of his two Frends, Craterus and Hephe∣stion; That Hephestion loued Alexander, and Craterus loued the King.

96. It fell out so, that as Liuia went abroad in Rome, there met her naked young Page  123 Men, that were sporting in the streets: Which Augustus was about seuerely to pu∣nish in them: But Li∣uia spake for them, and said; It was no more to chaste women, then so many Statua's.

97. Alonso of Aragon was wont to say, in commendation of Age, that Age appea∣red to be best in •…oure Page  124 things; Old wood best to burne; Old wine to drinke; Old Frends to trust; and Old Authors to reade.

98. It was said of Au∣gustus, & afterwards the like was said of Septimius Seuerus: Both which did infi∣nite mischiefe in their beginnings, and infi∣nite good towards their ends; That theyPage  125should either neuer haue beene borne, or ne∣uer died.

99. Queene Isabell of Spaine would say; Whosoeuer hath a good presence, and a good fa∣shion, carries Letters of Recommendation.

100. Traian would say of the vaine jelousie of Princes, that seeke to make away those Page  126 that aspire to their Succession; That there was neuer King, that did put to death his Successour.

101. When it was re∣presented to Alexan∣der, to the aduantage of Antipater, who vvas a sterne and im∣perious Man, that hee onely of all his Lieu∣tenants, vvore no Pur∣ple, but kept the Ma∣cedonian Page  127 Habit of Blacke, Alexander said; Yes, but Antipa∣ter is all Purple within.

102. Constantine the Great, in a kinde of •…nuie, himselfe being a great Builder, as Traian likewise was, would call Traian, Wall-flower, because his name was vpon so many walls.

Page  128 103. Philip of Macedon was wished to banish one, for speaking ill of him: But Philip said; Better he speake where wee are both knowne, then where we are both vnknowne.

104. A Grecian Cap∣taine aduising the Confederares, that were vnited against the L•…demonians, touching their Enter∣prise, Page  129 gaue opinion, that they should goe directly vpon Sparta, saying; That the state of Sparta was like Riuers; strong when they had runne a great way, and weake to∣wards their Head.

105. Alonso of Aragon was wont to say of himselfe; That he was a great Necromancer, for that he vsed to askePage  130Counsell of the Dead: meaning Books.

106. I •…llus entertai∣ned Pompey, in one of •…is magnificent house: Pompey said; This is a maruellous faire and stately house for the Summer, but, 〈◊〉 thinkes, it should be 〈◊〉〈◊〉 for the Winters Lugullus answe∣red; Doe you not thinks me as wise as di∣uersePage  131Fowle are, to re∣moue with the season?

107. Plato entertained some of his Frends at a Dinner, and had in the Chamber, a Bed or Couch, nearly and costly furnished. Dio∣genes came in, and got vp vpon the Bed, and trampled vpon it, and said; I trample vpon the pride of Plato. Plato mildly Page  132 answered; But with greater pride.

108. One was exami∣ned, vpon certaine scandalous words spoken against the King. He confessed them, and said; It is true, I spake them, and if the wine had not fai∣led, I had said much more.

109. Pompey being Page  133 Commissioner, for sending graine to Rome, in time of Dearth, when hee came to the sea, hee found it verie tempe∣stuous & dangerous; Insomuch as those a∣bout him, aduised him by no meanes to embarque. But Pom∣pey said; It is of neces∣sitie that I goe, not that I liue.

Page  134 110. Traian would say, That the Kings Ex∣checquer was like the Spleene; for when that did swell, the whole Bo∣die did pine.

111. Charles the Bauld allowed one, whose name was Scottus, to sit at the Table with him, for his pleasure Scottus sate on the other side of the Ta∣ble. One time the Page  135 King being merrie with him, said to him; What is there betweene Scot and Sot? Scottus answered; The table onely.

112. Ethelwold, Bishop of Winchester, in a fa∣mine, sold all the rich Vessells and Orna∣ments of the Church, to releeue the poore with bread: and said; There was no reason,Page  136that the dead Temples of God should be sump∣tuously furnished, and the liuing Temples suf∣fer penurie.

113. There was a Mar∣riage made betweene a Widow of great wealth, and a Gentle∣man of great House, that had no estate or meanes. Iack Ro∣berts said; That Mar∣riage was like a blackePage  137pudding; the one brought Blo'd, and the other brought Sewet and Oatmcale.

114. Demosthenes was vpbraided by Aeschi∣nes, that his speeches did smell of the Lampe. But Demo∣sthenes said; Indeed there is a great diffe∣rence, betweene that that you and I doe by Lampe-light.

Page  138 115. Demades the Ora∣tour, in his age was talkatiue, and would eat hard. An•…ipater would say of him; That he was like a Sa∣crifice, that nothing was left of it, but the Tongue & the Paunch.

116. When King Ed∣ward the second was amongst his Tortu∣rers, who hurried him too and fro, that no Page  139 man should know where hee was, they set him down vpon a Banke; And one time the more to disguise his face, shaued him, and washed him, with cold water of a ditch by: The King sayd; Well yet, I will haue warme water for my Beard. And so shed abundance of Teares.

117 The Turke made Page  140 an Expedition into Persia, and because of the strait jawes of the Mountaines of Ar∣menia, the Basha's consulted which way they should get in. Saies a naturall Foole that stood by: Here's much adoe how you should get in, but I heare no Bodie take care, how you should get out.

Page  141 118. Sir Thomas Moore, when the Counsell of the Partie pressed him for a longer day, said; Take St. Barna∣bies day, which is the longest day in the yeere. Now St. Bar∣nabies day was with∣in few dayes follow∣ing.

119. One of the Fathers saith; That there is but this difference be∣tweenePage  142the death of old men and young men; that old men goe to death, and death comes to young Men.

120. Philo Iudaeus saith; That the Sense is like the Sun: Far the Sun seales vp the Globe of Heauen, and opens the Globe of Earth: So the Sense doth obscure hea∣uenly things, & reueale earthly things.

Page  143 121. Cassius, after the defeat of Crassus, by the Parthians, whose weapons were chiefly Arrowes,, fled to the Citie of •…rras, where he durst not stay any 〈◊〉, doubting to be pursued, & besieged. 〈◊〉 had with him an Astrologer, who said to him; Sir, I would not haue you goe hence, while the Moone is in the signe of Scorpic.Page  144 Cassius answered; I am more afraid, of that of Sagittarie.

122. Alexander, after the Battell of Gram∣cum, had very great Offers made him by Darius. Consulting with his Captaines, cōcerning them, Par∣menio said; Sure, I would accept of these offers, if I were as A∣lexander. Alexander Page  145 answered; So would I, if I were as Parmenio.

123. Alexander was wont to say; Hee knew he was mortall by two things, Sleepe, and Lust.

124. Augustus Caesar was inuited to supper, by one of his old Frends, that had con∣uersed with him, in his lesse Fortunes, and Page  146 had but ordinarie en∣tertainment. Where∣upon, at his going, he said; I did not know, that you and I were so familiar.

125. Augustus Caesar would say; That hee wondred, that Alexan∣der feared hee should want worke, hauing no more to conquer: As if it were not as hard a mat∣terto keep, as to conquer.

Page  147 126. Antigonus, when it was told him, that the enemie had such vol∣leyes of arrowes, that they did hide the Sunne, said; That falls out well, for it is hot wether, and wee shall fight in the shade.

127. Augustus Caesar 〈◊〉 write to Liuia, who was ouer-sensi∣ble of some ill words that had been spoken Page  148 of them both; Let it not trouble you, my Li∣uia, if any man speake ill of vs, for wee haue enough, that no man can doe ill vnto vs.

128. Chilon said; That Kings Frends and Fa∣uourites were like Ca∣sting Counters, that sometimes stood for one, sometimes for ten, some∣times for a hundred.

Page  149 129. Theodosius, when hee was pressed by a Sutour, and denied him, the Sutour said; Why, Sir, you promised it. Hee answered; I said it, but I did not pro∣mise it, if it be vniust.

130. Agathocles, after he had takē Syracusa, the men whereof, during the Siege, had in a brauerie, spoken of him all the villanie Page  150 that mought be, sold the Syracusans for slaues, and said; Now if you vse such words of mee, I will tell your Masters of you.

131. Dionysius the El∣der, when he saw his Son, in many things 〈◊〉 inordinate, said to him; Did you ever know mee 〈◊〉 such things 〈◊〉 His Sonn•… answered, No, butPage  151you had not a Tyrant to your Father: The Father replyed; No, 〈◊〉 you, if you take these courses, will haue 〈◊〉 Tyrant to your Son.

132. Callisthenes the Philosopher, that fol∣lowed Alexanders Court, and hated the King, was askt by one; How one should 〈◊〉 the famousest 〈◊〉 in the world?Page  152 And answered; By taking away him that is.

133. Sir Edward Coke was wont to say, when a great Man came to Dinner to him, and gaue him no know∣ledge of his com∣ming; Well, since you sent me no word of your comming, you shall dine with mee but if I had knowne of your cōming, I would haue dined with you.

Page  153 134. The Romans, when they spake to the peo∣ple, were wont to call them; Yee Romans. When Commanders in War spake to their Armie, they, called them; My Souldiers. There was a Mucinie in Caesars Armie, and somewhat the Souldiers would haue had, but they would not declare them∣selues in it: Onely Page  154 they demanded, a Di∣mission or discharge, though with no in∣tention it should bee granted: But know∣ing that Caesar had, at that time, great need of their seruice, thought by that meanes, to wrench him to their other de∣sires. Whereupon, with one try, they as∣ked Dimission. But Caesar, after silence Page  155 made, said; I, for my 〈◊〉, yee Romans: which admitied thē 〈◊〉 bee dismissed: Which voice they had no sooner heard, but they mutined againe, 〈◊〉 would not suffer 〈◊〉 to goe on, vntill 〈◊〉 had called them by the name of Soul∣diers. And so, with 〈◊〉 word, 〈◊〉〈◊〉 the 〈◊〉.

Page  156 135. Caesar would say of Sylla, for that hee did resigne his Dicta∣tourship; That hee was ignorant of letters, he could not dictate.

136. Seneca said of Cae∣sar; That he did quick∣ly sheath the sword, but neuer laid it off.

137. Diogenes begging as diuerse Philoso∣phers then vsed, did Page  157 beg more of a prodi∣•…ll man, then of the test that were present: Whereupon one said 〈◊〉 him; See your base∣nesse, that when you •…de a liberall minde, you will take most of. No, (said Diogenes) but I meane to beg of the rest againe.

138. Iason the Thessali∣an was wont to say; That some things mustPage  158be done vniustly, that many things may bee done iustly.

139. Sir Nicholas Bacon being Keeper of the Seale, when Queene Elizabeth, in pro∣gresse, came to his house at Redgraue, and said to him; My Lo. what a little house haue you gotten? said, Madam, my house is well, but it is you thatPage  159〈◊〉 made me too great 〈◊〉〈◊〉 house.

140. •…mistocles, when 〈◊〉 Embassador from 〈◊〉 meane State did 〈◊〉 great matters, 〈◊〉 to him; Frend, 〈◊〉 words would re∣•… a Citie.

141. Agesilaus, when one told him there was one did excel∣lently counterfet a Page  160 Nightingale, and would haue had him heare him, said; Why, I haue heard the Nigh∣tingale her selfe.

142. A great Noble∣man, vpon the com∣plaint of a Seruant of his, layd a Citizen by the heeles, thinking to bend him to his Seruants desire. But the Fellow being stubborne, the Ser∣uant Page  161 came to his Lo. and told him; Your •…op. I know, hath gone as farre as well you may, but it workes not, for yonder Fellow is more peruerse then be∣fore. Said my Lo Let's forget him a while, and then he will remember himselfe.

143. One came to a Car∣dinall in Rome, and told him; That he hadPage  162brought his LoP a dain∣tie white Palfrey, but he fell lame by the way. Saith the Cardinall to him; •…e tell thee what thou shalt doe; Goe to such a Cardinall, and such a Cardinall, (naming him some halfe a dozen Cardi∣nalls) and tell them as much; And so, where∣as by thy horse, if hee had beene found, thou couldst haue pleasedPage  163but one, with thy lame borsethou maiest please halfe a dozen.

144. Iphicrates the Athe∣nian, in a Treatie that he had with the Lace∣demonians for peace, in which questiō was about securitie for obseruing the same, said; The Athenians would not accept of any Securitie, except the Lacedemonians didPage  164yeeld vp vnto them those things, whereby it mought bee manifest, that they could not hurt them, if they would.

145. Euripides would say of persons that were beautifull, and yet in some yeeres; In faire bodies, not onely the Spring is pleasant, but also the Autumne.

Page  165 146. After a great fight, there came to the Campe of Consaluo the great Captaine, a Gentle-man proudly horsed and armed. Diego de Mendoza askt the great Cap∣taine; Who's this? Who answered; It is St Ermin, that neuer appeares, but after a storme.

147. There was a Cap∣taine Page  166 sent to an Ex∣ploit by his Generall, with Forces that were not likely to at∣chieue the Enterprise. The Captaine said to him; Sir, appoint but halfe so many. Why? (saith the Generall.) The Captaine answe∣red; Because it is bet∣ter fewer die then more.

148. They would say of the Duke of Guise Page  167 Henrie, that had sold and oppignerated all his Patrimonie, to suf∣fice the great Dona∣n̄ues that hee had made; That hee was the greatest Vsurer of France, because all his 〈◊〉 was in obligations.

149. Croesus said to Cambyses; That Peace was better then warre; because in peace the Sonnes did buriePage  168their Fathers, but in warres, the Fathers did burie their Sonnes.

150. There was an Har∣binger had lodged a Gentle-man in a ve∣rie ill roome, who ex∣postulated with him somewhat rudely; But the Harbinger carelesly sayd; You will take pleasure in it, when you are out of it.

Page  169 151. There was a curst •…age, that his Master •…hipt naked: And when hee had beene •…hipt, would not put on his Cloaths: And when his Master hade him, said to him; •…ake them you, for they are the Hangmans fees.

152. There was one that died greatly in debt. When it was reported in some Page  170 companie, where di∣uerse of his Creditors were, that hee was dead, one began to say; In good faith, then hee hath carried 500. Duckets of mine, with him, into the other world. And another of them said; And 200. of mine. And some others spake of seuerall summes of theirs. Whereupon, one that was amongst Page  171 them, said; Well, I see how, that though a man •…not carrie any of his •…wne with him into the 〈◊〉 world, yet he may carrie other mens.

153. Francis Caruajall, that was the great Captaine of the Re∣bells of Peru, had of∣ten giuen the chace to Diego Centeno, a principall Comman∣der of the Emperours Page  172 partie. He was after∣wards taken by the Emperours Licute∣nant Gasca, and com∣mitted to the custo∣die of Diego Cente∣no, who vsed him with all possible cur∣tesie; Insomuch as Caruajall askt him; I pray, Sir, who are you, that vse mee with this curtefie? Centeno said; Doe you not know Diego Centeno?Page  173•…uajall answered; 〈◊〉 good faith, Sir, I •…ue beene so vsed to 〈◊〉 your backe, as I •…ew not your face.

154. Caruajall, when he was drawne to exe∣•…tion, being foure∣•…ore and fiue yeeres old, and layd vpon the Hurdle, sayd; What? young in cradle, old in cradle?

Page  147 155. There is a Spanish Adage; Loue without end, hath no end: Mea∣ning, that if it were begun, not vpon par∣ticular ends, it would last.

156. Cato the Elder, be∣ing aged, buried his Wife, and married a young woman. His Sonne came to him, and said; Sir, what haue I offended you,Page  175that you haue brought Step mother into your 〈◊〉? The old Man answered; N•…y, quite •…ntrarie, Sonne, thou •…easest me so well, as I would be glad to haue more such.

157. Crassus the Ora∣tour had a Fish, which the Romans call'd Murena, that hee had made verie tame, and fond of him. The Page  176 Fish died, and Crassus wept for it. One day falling in contention with Domitius in the Senate, Domitius said; Foolish Crassus, you wept for your Murena. Crassus replied; That's more then you did for both your wiues.

158. Philip, Alexanders Father, gaue Sentence against a Prisoner, what time hee was Page  177 drowsie, and seemed 〈◊〉 giue small attenti∣•…; The Prisoner, •…er sentēce was pro•…unced, said; I ap∣•…ale. The King some∣what stirred, sayd; 〈◊〉 whom doe you ap∣•…ale? The Prisoner answered; From Phi∣lip when hee gaue no •…are, to Philip when he shall giue care.

159. The same Philip Page  178 maintained Argu∣ment with a Musici∣an, in points of his Art, somewhat pe∣remptorily. But the Musician said to him; God forbid, Sir, your Fortune were so hard, that you should know these things better then I.

160. There was a Phi∣losopher that dispu∣ted with Adrian the Page  179 Emperour, and did it but weakely. One of his Frends that had beene by, after wards 〈◊〉 to him; Mee thinkes you were no•… like your selfe, last day, in Argument with the Emperour, I could haue •…swered better my selfe. Why, sayd the Philosopher, would you haue mee contend 〈◊〉 him that 〈1 line〉

Page  180 161. Diogenes was as∣ked in a kinde of scorne; What was the matter, that Philosophers haunted rich men, and not rich men Philosophers? He an∣svvered; Because the one knew what they wanted, the other did not.

162. Demetrius King of Macedon, had a peti∣tion offered him di∣ucrse Page  181 times by an old Woman, and still an∣swered; Hee had no •…sure. Whereupon, the woman said a∣loud; Why then giue ouer to be King.

163. The same Deme∣trius would, at times, r•…ro himselfe from businesse, and giue himselfe wholly to pleasures. One day of those his retirings, gi∣uing Page  182 out that he was sicke, his Father Anti∣gonus came, on the suddaine, to visit him, and met a faire dain∣tie youth comming out of his Chamber, When Antigonus came in, Demetrius said; Sir, the feauer left me right now. An∣tigonus replyed; I thinke it was hee that I met at the doore.

Page  183 164. There was a Mer∣•… farre in debt that died. His goods 〈◊〉 houshold stuffe 〈◊〉 set forth to sale. 〈◊〉 was one that 〈◊〉 onely a pillow, and said; This pillow sure is good to 〈◊〉 vpon, since bee could sleepe that owed 〈◊〉 many debts.

165. A Louer met his Lady in a close chaire, Page  184 shee thinking to goe vnknowne. He came and spake to her. She askt him; How did you know me? He said; Because my wounds bled afresh. Alluding to the commen tra∣dition, That the wounds of a bodie slaine, in the presence of him that kill'd him, will bleed a∣fresh.

Page  185 166. A Gentle-man brought Musicke to his Ladies window, who hated him, and had warned him oft away: And when he persisted, shee threw stones at him. Where∣upon, a Frend of his, that was in his com∣panie, sayd to him; What greater honour can you haue to your Musicke, then that stones come about you,Page  186as they did to Orpheus?

167. Cato Maior would say.; That wise men learned more by Fooles, then Fooles by wise men.

168. When it was sayd to Anaxagoras; The Athenians haue con∣demned you to die. He said againe; And Na∣ture them.

Page  187 169. Demosthenes, whē 〈◊〉 from the Bat∣•…, and that it wasre∣•…proached to him, 〈◊〉; That hee that 〈◊〉 mought fight a∣gaine.

170. Antalcidas, when an Athenian said to him; Ye Spartans are •…learned: said a∣gaine; True, for wee, haue learned, no euill, nor vice, of you.

Page  188 171. Alexander, when his Father wished him, to runne, for the prize of the Race, at the Olympiā Games, (for hee was very swift) said; He would, if he might runne with Kings.

172. When Alexander passed into Asia, hee gaue large Dona∣tiues, to his Captains, and other principall Page  189 Men of Vertue: In 〈◊〉 much, as Parmenio 〈◊〉 him; Sir, what doe you keepe, for your selfe? Hee answered; Hope.

173. Antigonus vsed oft •…goe disguised, and listen at the Tents of his Souldiers: And at a time, heard some that spoke, very ill of him. Whereupon, he opened the Tent a lit∣tle, Page  190 and said to them If you will speake ill of mee, you should goe a little further off.

174. Vespasian set a Tri∣bute vpon Vrine. Ti∣tus his Sonne, em∣boldned himselfe; to speake to his Father of it; and represented it, as a thing indigne, and sordid. Vespasi∣an said nothing for the time; but a while Page  191 after, when it was for∣gotten, sent for a piece of Siluer, out of the Tribute Money, and called to his Sonne, •…ding him smell to it; and asked him; Whether he found any offence? Who said; No. Why loe (saith Vespa∣sran againe) and yet thir comes out of Vrine.

175. There were two Page  192 Gentlemen, otherwise of equall degree, saue that the one, was of the ancienter house. The other, in curte∣sie, asked his Hand to kisse: which hee gaue him: And he kist it: But said withall, to right himselfe, by way of Friendship; Well, I and you, against any two of them: Put∣ting himselfe first.

Page  193 176. Nerua the Empe∣•…, succeeded Do∣•…, who was ay∣•…nicall; so as in his 〈◊〉, many noble •…ouses, were ouer∣•…rowne, by false Ac∣•…tions; the Instru∣•…ents whereof, were •…iefly, Marcellus and Regulus. The Empe∣rour, one night, 〈◊〉, 〈◊〉, with some 〈◊〉 o•… seuen: Amongst which, there was one, Page  194 that was a dangerous Man, and began to take, the like courses, as Marcellus, and Re∣gulus had done. The Emperour fell into discourse, of the Iniu∣stice, and Tyranny, of the former time, and by name, of the two Accusers, and said; What should wee doe with them, if wee had them now? One of them, that were at Page  195 supper, and was a free spokē Senatour, said; Marry, they should sup with vs.

177. There was one that found a great masse of money, digged vn∣der ground, in his Grand-fathers house. And being some what doubtfull of the case, signified it to the Em∣perour, that hee had found such Treasure. Page  196 The Emperour made a Rescript thus; Vse it. Hee writ backe a∣gaine, that the summe was greater then his Estate or Condition could vse. The Em∣perour writ a new Rescript, thus; Abuse it.

178. A Spaniard was censuring to a French Gentleman, the want of deuotion amongst Page  197 the French: In that, whereas in Spaine, when the Sacrament goes to the sicke, any that meets with it, turnes backe, & waits vpon it to the house whither it goes: But in France, they onely doe reuerence, and passe by. But the French Gentle-man answered him; There is reason for it, for here with vs, Christ is se∣curePage  198amongst his Frends; but in Spaine, there be so many Iewes and Marano's, that it is not amisse for him to haue a Conuoy.

179. Coranus the Spani∣ard, at a table at din∣ner, fell into an extol∣ling of his owne Fa∣ther, and sayd; If he should haue wished of God, he could not haue chosen amongst men, aPage  199better Father. Sir Henrie Sauill sayd; What, not Abraham? Now Coranus was doubted to descend of a race of Iewes.

180. Consaluo would say; The honour of a Souldier ought to be of a good strong webbe: Meaning, that it should not be so fine and curious, that e∣uerie little disgrace Page  200 should catch, and sticke in it.

181. One of the Seuen was wont to say; That Lawes were like Copwebs; where the small Flies were caught, and the great brake thorow.

182. Bias gaue in pre∣cept; Loue, as if you should hereafter hate; and hate, as if youPage  201should hereafter loue.

183. Aristippus being reprehended of Lu∣•…urie, by one that was not rich, for that he gaue six Crownes for a small Fish, an∣swered; Why, what would you haue giuen? The other said; Some twelue pence. Aristip∣pus said againe; And six Crownes is no more with me.

Page  202 184. There was a French Gentleman speaking with an English, of the Law Salique; That women were excluded to inherit the Crown of France. The English sayd; Yes, but that was meant of the women them∣selues, not of such Males as claim'd by women. The French Gentle∣man sayd; Where doe you finde that Glosse?Page  203 The English answe∣red; He tell you, Sir, looke on the backside of the Record of the Law Salique, and there you shall finde it endorsed. Meaning, there was no such thing at all, as the Law Salique, but that it was a Fiction.

185. There was a Frier in earnest dispute a∣bout the Law Sa∣lique, that would Page  204 needs proue it by Scripture; citing that verse of the Gospell; Lilia agri non labo∣rant, ne{que} nent: Which is as much to say, (saith he) that the Flower de luces of France cannot descend, neither to Di∣staffe, nor Spade: that is, not to a woman, nor to a Peasant.

186. Iulius Caesar, as hee passed by, was by ac∣clamation Page  205 of some that were suborned, called King; to trie how the people would take it. The People shewed great murmur and distaste at it. Caesar finding where the winde stood, slighted it, and said; I am not King, but Caesar: As if they had mistooke his name: For Rex was a Surname amongst Page  206 the Romans, as King is with vs.

187. When Croesus, for his glory, shewed So∣lon great Treasure of Gold, Solon sayd to him; If another come, that hath better iron then you, hee will bee Master of all this Gold.

188. There was a Gen∣tleman that came to the Tilt, all in Orenge Page  207 tawnie, and ranne ve∣rie ill. The next day he came all in Green, and ranne worse There was one of the Lookers on askt ano∣ther; What's the rea∣son, that this Gentle∣man changeth his Co∣lours? The other an∣swered; Sure, because it may be reported, that the Gentleman in the Greene ranne worse then the GentlemanPage  208in the Orenge tawnie.

189. Aristippus sayd, That those that studied particular Sciences, & neglected Philosophie, were like Penelopes Wooers, that made loue to the waiting women.

190. Plato reproued se∣uerely a young man, for entring into a dis∣solute house. The young man sayd to Page  209 him; What, for so small a matter? Plato re∣plyed; But Custome is no small matter.

191. There was a Law made by the Romans against the Briberie and Extortion of the Gouernours of Pro∣uinces. Cicero saith, in a Speech of his to the People; That hee thought the Prouinces would petition to thePage  210State of Rome, to haue that Law repealed. For (saith hee) before, the Gouernours did bribe and extort as much as was sufficient for them∣selues; but now they bribe and extort as much as may be enough, not only for themselues, but for the Iudges, and Iurours, and Magi∣strates.

192. Archidamus King Page  211 of Lacedemon, ha∣uing receiued from Philip King of Ma∣cedon, after Philip had won the victorie of Cheronea vpon the Athenians, proud Letters, writ backe to him; That if hee mea∣sured his owne shadow, hee should finde it no longer now, then it was before his victorie.

193. Pyrrhus, when his Page  212 Frends congratulated to him his victorie ouer the Romans, vnder the conduct of Fabricius, but with great slaughter of his owne side, said to them againe; Yes, but if we haue such another victorie, wee are vn∣done.

194. Cineas was an ex∣cellent Oratour and States-man, and prin∣cipall Page  213 Frend & Coun∣sellour to Pyrrhus; And falling in inward talke with him, and discerning the Kings endlesse ambition, Pyrrhus opened him∣selfe to him; That he intended first a warre vpon Italy, and hoped to atchieue it. Cineas asked him; Sir, what will you doe then? Then (saith he) wee will attempt Sicily.Page  214 Cineas said; Well Sir, what then? Then (saith Pyrihus) if the Gods fauour vs, we may con∣quer Asfrick and Car∣thage. What then, Sir? saith Cineas. Nay then (saith Pyrrhus) wee may take our rest, and sacrifice, and feast euerie day, and make merry withour Frends. Alas Sir (said Cineas) may we not doe so now, without all this adoe?

Page  215 195. The Embassadours of Asia Minor came to Antonius, after hee had imposed vpon them a double taxe, and said plainely to him; That if he would haue two Tributes in one yeere, he must giue them two S•…ed-times, and two Haruests.

196. Plato was wont to say of his Master So∣crates; That hee wasPage  216like the Apothecaries Galley-pots, that had on the outside Apes, and Owles, and Satyres, but within precious drugs.

197. Lamia the Curti∣san had all power with Demetrius King of Macedon: And by her instigation he did many vniust & cruell Acts. Wherupon Ly∣simachus said; That it was the first time,Page  217that euer hee knew a Whore play in a Tra∣gedie.

198. The mistocles would say of himselfe; That hee was like a Plaine Tree, that in Tempests men fled to him, and in faire wether, men were euer cropping his leanes.

199. The mistocles said of Speech; That it was like Arras, thatPage  218spred abroad shewes faire Images, but con∣tracted, is but like packs.

200. Brisquet, Iester to Francis the first of France, did keepe a Kalender of Fooles; wherewith he did vse to make the King sport; telling him e∣uer the reason, why hee put euerie one in∣to his Kalender. So Page  219 when Charles the fifth passed, vpon confidence of the no∣ble nature of Francis, thorow France, for the appeasing of the rebellion of Gaunt, Brisquet put him into his Kalender. The King asking the cause, he sayd; Because you hauing suffered at the hands of Charles, the greatest bitternesse that euer Prince did fromPage  220other, hee would trust his person into your hands. Why Brisquet, (said the King) what wilt thou say, if thou seest him passe in as great safetic, as if it were thorow the midst of Spaine? Saith Bris∣quet, Why then I will put out him, and put in you.

201. Lewis the cleuenth of France, hauing Page  221 much abated the greatnesse and power of the Peeres, Nobi∣litie, and Court of Parliament, would say; That hee had brought the Crowne out of Ward.

202. Sir Fulke Greuill, in Parliament, when the Lower House, in a great Businesse of the Queenes, stood much vpon Presidents, said Page  222 vnto them; Why should you stand so much vpon Presidents? the times hereafter will be good or bad: If good, Presidents will doe no harme; if bad, Power will make a way where it findes none.

203. When Peace was renewed with the French in England, diuerse of the great Counsellours were Page  223 presented from the French with Iewells. The Lo. Henrie Ho ward was omitted. Whereupon the King said to him; My Lo. How hap's it that you haue not a Iewell, as well as the rest? My Lo. Henrie answered againe, (alluding to the Fable in Aesope;) Non sum Gallus, itaque non reperi Gemmam.

Page  224 204. An Oratour of A∣thens said to Demo∣sthenes; The Atheni∣ans will kill you, if they wax mad. Demosthe¦nes replyed; And they will kill you, if they bee in good sense.

205. Alexander sent to Phocyon a great Pre∣sent of money. Pho∣cyon said to the Mes∣senger; Why doth the King send to me, and toPage  225none else? The Mes∣senger answered; Be∣cause hee takes you to be the onely good Man in Athens. Phocyon re∣plyed; If he thinke so, pray let him suffer mee to be good still.

206. Cosmus Duke of Florence was wont to say of perfidious Frends; That wee reade, that we ought to forgiue our Enemies;Page  226but we doe not reade, that wee ought to for∣giue our Frends.

207. Aeneas Syluius, that was Pius Secundus, was wont to say; That the former Popes did wisely, to set the Lawyers on worke, to debate, whether the Donation of Constan∣tine the Gr•…at to Sylue∣ster, were good and va∣lid in Law, or no?Page  227The better to skip ouer the matter in fact, whe∣ther there were any such thing at all, or no?

208. At a Banquet, where those that were called the Seuen Wise Men of Greece, were inuited by the Embassadour of a Barbarous King, the Embassadour related; That there was a Neighbour King, Page  228 mightier then his Master, pickt quar∣rells with him, by ma∣king impossible de∣mands, otherwise threatning warre: And now at that pre∣sent had demanded of him, to drinke vp the Sea. Whereunto one of the Wise Men said; I would haue him vndertake it. Why (saith the Embassa∣dour) how shall he comePage  229off? Thus; (saith the Wise Man) Let that King first stop the Ri∣uers that runne into the Sea, which are no part of the Bargaine, and then your Master will performe it.

209. At the same Ban∣quet, the Embassa∣dour desired the Se∣uen, and some other Wise Men, that were at the Banquet, to de∣liuer Page  230 euerie one of them some Sentence or Parable, that hee mought report to his King the wisdome of Grecia. Which they did. Onely one was silent. Which the Em∣bassadour perceiuing, sayd to him; Sir, let it not displease you, why doe not you say some∣what, that I may re∣port? Hee answered; Report to your Lo. thatPage  231there are of the Greci∣ans, that can hold their peace.

210. One of the Ro∣mans said to his Frend; What thinke you of such an one, as was taken with the manner in adulterie? The other answered; Marrie, I thinke, hee was slow at dispatch.

211. Lycurgus would Page  232 say of diuerse of the Heroes of the Hea∣then; That hee won∣dred that men should mourne vpon their dayes, for them, as mor∣tall men, and yet sacri∣fice to them as Gods.

212. A Papist being op∣posed by a Protestant, that they had no Scripture for Images, answered; Yes, for you reade, that the Peo∣plePage  233layd their ficke in the streets, that the sha∣dow of St. Peter mought come vpon them: And that a shadow was an Image: And the ob∣scurest of Images.

213. There is an Eccle∣siasticall Writer of the Papists, to proue Anti∣quitie of Confessio, in the forme that it now is, doth note, that in very ancient times, Page  234 euen in the Primitiue times, amongst other foule slanders spred against the Christi∣ans, one was; That they did adore the Ge∣nitories of their Priests. Which (he saith) grew from the posture of the Confessant, and the Priest in Confession: which is, that the Con∣fessant kneeles downe, before the Priest fitting in a raised chaire aboue him.

Page  235 214. Epaminondas, whe his great Frend and Colleague in warre, was Sutour to him, to pardon an Offender, denied him. After∣wards, when a Con∣cubine of his made the same sute, hee granted it to her: Which when Pelopi∣das seemed to take vnkindely, hee sayd; Such sutes are to bee granted to whores, butPage  236not to Personages of worth.

215. The Lacedemoni∣ans had in custome to speake verie short. Which, being in Em∣pire, they mought doe at pleasure. But after their Defeat at Leuctra, in an Assem∣bly of the Grecians, they made a long In∣uectiue against Epa∣•…ondas; who stood Page  237 vp, and said no more, but this; I am glad we haue taught you to speake long,

216. Fabricius, in con∣ference with Pyrrhus, was tempted to re∣uolt to him; Pyrrhus telling him, that hee should bee Partner of his Fortunes, and se∣cond Person to him. But Fabricius answe∣red, in a scorne, to Page  238 such a motion; Sir, that would not bee good for your selfe: For if the Epyrotes once know me, they will rather de∣sire to bee gouerned by me, then by you.

217. Fabius Maximus being resolued to draw the warre in length, still waited vpon Hannibals pro∣gresse, to curbe him; And for that purpose, Page  239 hee encamped vpon the high Grounds. But Terentius his Collegue fought with Hannibal, and was in great perill of ouer∣throw. But then Fa∣bius came downe the high Grounds, & got the day: Where∣upon Hannibal sayd; That he did euer think, that that same Cloud that hanged vpon the Hills, would at onePage  240time or other, giue a Tempest.

218. There was a cow∣ardly Spanish Soul∣dier, that in a Defeat the Moores gaue, ran away with the fore∣most. Afterwards, when the Armie ge∣nerally fled, this Soul∣dier was missing Whereupon, it was sayd by some, that he was •…saine. No sure,Page  241 (saith one) he is aliue, for the Moores eat no •…ares flesh.

219. Hanno the Cartha∣ginian was sent Com∣missioner, by the •…tate, after the second Carthaginian Warre, to Rome, to suppli∣cate for peace, and in the end obtained it. Yet one of the sharper Senatours sayd; You haue often broken withPage  242vs the Peaces, where∣unto you haue beene sworne, I pray, by what Gods will you sweare? Hanno an∣swered; By the same Gods, that haue puni∣shed the former periu∣rie so seuerely.

220. Thales being as∣ked, when a Man should marrie, sayd; Young Men not yet, old Men not at all.

Page  243 221. Thales sayd; That •…fe and Death were 〈◊〉 one. One that was •…esent askt him; Why doe not you die then? Thales sayd a∣gaine; Because they •…e all one.

222. Caesar, after first he had possest Rome, Pompey being fled, offered to enter the sacred Treasurie, to take the Moneys that Page  244 were there stored. Metellus, Tribune of the People, did forbid him. And when Me∣tellus was violent in it, and would not desist, Caefar turned to him, and sayd; Presume no further, or I will lay you dead. And when Metellus was with those words somewhat astonisht, Caesar added; Young Man, it had beene easierPage  245•…e to doe this, then 〈◊〉 speake it.

223. An Aegyptian Priest •…uing conference with Solon, sayd to him; You Grecians •…e euer children; you •…e no Knowledge of •…quitie, nor Antiqui∣•… of Knowledge.

224. The Counsell did make remonstrance to Queene Elizabeth, Page  246 of the continuall Conspiracies against her Life: And name∣ly, of a late one: And shewed her a Rapier, taken from a Conspi∣ratour, that had a false chape, being of browne paper, but gilt ouer, as it could not be knowne from a chape of Mettall; which was deuised, to the end, that with∣out drawing, the Ra∣pier Page  247 mought giue a stab; And, vpon this occasion, aduised her, that shee should goe lesse abroad to take the aire, weakly ac∣companied, as shee vsed. But the Queene answered; That shee had rather be dead, then put in custodie.

225. Chilon would say; That Gold was tried with the Touch-stone,Page  248 and Men with Gold.

226. Zelim was the first of the Ottomans that did shaue his beard, whereas his Predeces∣sours wore it long. One of his Basha's askt him; Why be al∣tred the custome of his Predecessours? He an∣swered; Because, you Basha's, shall not leade me by the beard, as you did them.

Page  249 227. Diogenes was one day in the Market∣place, with a candle in his hand, And be∣•…ng askt; What hee sought? He sayd; He sought a Man.

228. Bi•…s being asked; How a Man should or∣der his life answe∣red; As if a Man should liue long, or die quickly.

Page  250 229. Queene Elizabeth was entertained, by my Lo. Burleigh at Theobalds: And at her going away, my Lo. obtained of the Queene, to make se∣uen Knights. They were Gentlemen of the Countrey, of my Lords Frends and Neighbours. They were placed in a rank, as the Queene should passe by the Hall; Page  251 And to winne Anti∣quitie of Knight hood, in order, as my Lo. fauoured; though indeed the more prin∣cipall Gentle-men were placed lowest. The Queene was told of it, and said no∣thing; but when she went along, shee pas∣sed them all by, as far as the skreene, as if shee had forgot it: And when shee came Page  252 to the skreene, she see∣med to take her∣selfe with the maner, and sayd; I had al∣most forgot what I promised. With that she turned backe, and knighted the lowest first, and so vpward Wherupon Mr. Stan∣hope of the Pri•… Chamber, a while af∣ter told her; Your Maiestic was too fine for my Lo. B•…leigh.Page  253 She answered; I haue but fulfilled the Scrip∣•…re; The first shall bee •…st, and the last first.

230. Simonides being •…sked of Hiero; What hee thought of God?•…skt a Seuen-nights time, to consider of it. And at the Seuen∣nights end, hee askt a Forthnights time. At the Forthnights end, 〈◊〉 Moneth. At which Page  254 Hiero maruelling, Si∣monides answered; That the longer hee thought on it, the more difficult he found it.

231. Anacharsis would say concerning the Popular Estates of Graecia; That he won∣dred, how at Athens, Wise Men did propose, and Fooles did dispose.

232. Solon compared Page  255 the People vnto the •…ea, and Oratours to •…he Windes; For that •…he Sea would be calme •…nd quiet, if the Windes did not trouble it.

233. Socrates was pro∣nounced by the Ora∣cle of Delphos, to be the wisest Man of Greece; which hee would put from him∣selfe, ironically say∣ing; There could beePage  256nothing in him to veri∣fie the Oracle, except this; That he w•… not wise, and knew it; and others were not wise, and knew it not.

234. Caro the Elder, what time many of the Romans had Sta∣tua's crected in their Honour, was askt by one in a kinde of wonder; Why he had 〈◊〉? And answered; Page  257•…e had much rather, •…en should aske, and •…onder, why he had no 〈◊〉, than why hee •…ad a Statua.

235. Sir Fulke Greuill, had much and pri∣•…ate accesse, to Queen Elizabeth, which hee vsed honourably, & did many men good, yet he would say mer∣rily of himselfe; That hee was like RobinPage  258Goodfellow; For when the Maides spilt the Milke-pans, or kept any racket, they would lay it vpon Robin: So what tales, the Ladies about the Queene, told her, or other bad offices, that they did, they would put it vpon him.

236. Socrates, when there was shewed him, the Booke of Page  259 Heraclitus the Ob∣scure, and was askt his opinion of it, an∣swered; Those things, that I vnderstood, were excellent, I imagine, so were those, that I vn∣derstood not: But they require a Diuer of Delos.

237. Bion askt an enui∣ous Man, that was very fad; What harme had befallen to him, orPage  [unnumbered]what good had be•…en to another Man?

238. Stilpo, the Philo∣sopher, when the peo∣ple flocked about him, and that one said to him; The people come wondring about you, as if it were, to see some strange Beast. No, (saith he) it is to see a Man, which Dio∣genes sought with his Lanthorne.

Page  261 239. Antisthenes, being asked of one; What Learning was most ne∣•…fary for Mans life? answered; To vn∣learne that which is naught.

240. There was a poli∣ticke Sermon, that had no Diuinity in it, was preached before the King. The King, as he came forth, said to Bishop Andrewes; Page  262Call you this a Sermon? The Bishop answe∣red; And it please your Maiesty, by a charita∣ble construction, it may be a Sermon.

241. Bishop Andrewes, was asked, at the first cōming ouer of the Bi∣shop of Spalato; Whe∣ther he were a Prote∣stant, or no? He answe∣red; Truly, I know not, but hee is a Detestant,Page  263of diuers Opinions of Rome.

242. Caius Marius, was Generall of the Ro∣mans, against the Cimbers, who came, with such a Sea of Multitude, vpon Ita∣ly. In the fight, there was a Band of the Ca∣durcians, of a Thou∣sand, that did notable seruice. Whereupon, after the fight, Marius Page  264 did Denison them all, for Cittizens of Rome, though there was no Law to war∣rant it. One of his Friends, did represent it vnto him, that hee had transgressed the Law, because that pri∣uiledge, was not to be granted, but by the People, Whereto Ma∣rius answered; That for the noyse of Armes, hee could not heare the Lawes.

Page  265 243. Aeneas Syluius would say; That the Christian Faith and Law, though it had not •…eene confirmed by Mi∣racles, yet was worthy to bee receiued, for the Honesty thereof.

244 Henry Noel would say; That Courtiers were like Fasting Daies; They were next the Holy-daies, but in themselues, they werePage  266the most meager Daies, of the weeke.

245. Mr. Bacon would say; That it was in Bu∣sinesse, as it is common∣ly in wayes; That the next way is commonly the foulest, and that if a Man will goe the fai∣rest way, hee must goe somewhat about.

246. Augustus Caesar, out of great indigna∣tion, Page  267 against his two Daughters, and Post∣•…umus Agrippa, his Grand-child; where∣of the first two were infamous, and the last otherwise vnworthy, would fay; That they were not his Seed, but some Impostumes, that •…ad broken from him.

247. Catosaid; The best way, to keepe good Acts in memory, wasPage  268to refresh them with now.

248. Poni•…ey did con∣sum•…e the warre against. Sertorius, When M•…ellus had brought the Enemi•… some what low. H•… did also consummat the w•… against the Fugitiues, whom Crassus had before defeated in a great B•…taile. So when Lu∣•…llus, Page  269 had had great •…nd glorious Victo∣•…ies, against Mithri∣•…ates, and Tigranes, •…er Pompey, by •…eanes his Friends •…ade, was sent, to •…ut an end, to that •…arre. Whereupon Lucullus, taking in∣dignation, as a dis∣grace offered to him∣selfe, said; That Pom∣pey was a carrion 〈◊〉, that when othersPage  270had strooken downe Bodies, he came to prey vpon them.

249. Diogenes, when Mice came about him, as he was eating, said; I see, that euen Diogenes nourisheth Parafites.

250. Epictetus vsed to say; That one of the vulgar, in any ill that happens to him, blamesPage  271•…hers: A Nouice in •…hilosophy, blames himselfe: And a philo∣•…opher, blames neither the one, nor the other.

251. Hiero, visited by Pythagoras, askthim; Of what condition he was? Pythagoras an∣swered; Sir, I kno•… you haue beene at the Olympian Games. Yes, saith Hiero. Thither (faith Pythagoras) Page  272come some, to win the Prizes. Some come to sell their Merchandize, because it is a kinde of Mart of all Greece. Some come, to meet their Friends, and make merry, because of the great confluence of all sorts. Others come onely to looke on. I am one of them, that come to looke on. Meaning it of Philosophy, Page  273 and the Contempla∣tiue Life.

252. Mr. Bettenham v∣sed to say; That Riches were like Mucke: When it lay, vpon an heape, it gaue but a stench, and ill odour; but when it was spread vpon the ground, then it was cause of much fruit.

253. The same Mr. Bet∣tenham said; ThatPage  274tuous Men, were like some Herbs, and Spices, that giue not their sweet smell, till they bee bro∣ken, and crushed.

254. There was a Pain∣ter, became a Physici∣an. Whereupon, one said to him; You haue done well; For before, the faults of your work were seene, but now they are vnseene.

Page  275 255. One of the Philo∣sophers was askt; What a wise Man dif∣fered from a Foole? He answered; Send them both naked, to those that know them not, and you shall perceiue.

256. Caesar, in his Booke, that he made against Cato, (which is lost,) did write, to shew the force of Opinion, and Reuerence, of a Man, Page  276 that had once ob∣tained, a popular re∣putation; That there were some, that found Cato drunke, and they were ashamed, in stead of Cato.

257. Aristippus, sayling in a Tempest, shewed signes of Feare. One of the Sea-men said to him, in an in∣sulting manner; Wee that are Plebeians, arePage  277not troubled, you, that are a Philosopher, are afraid. Aristippus an∣swered; There is not the like wager vpon it, for me to perish, and you,

258. There was an Ora∣tour, that defended a cause of Aristippus, and preuailed. After∣wards, he askt Aristip∣pus; Now, in your di∣stresse, what did Socra∣tesPage  278doe you good? Ari∣stippus answered; Thus; in making true, that good, which you said of me.

259. Aristippus said; He tooke money of his Friends, not so much to vse it himselfe, as to teach them, how to be∣stow their money.

260. A Strumpet said to Aristippus; ThatPage  279she was with child by him: Hee answered; You know that no more, than, if you went through a Hedge of Thornes, you could say, This Thorne prickt me.

261. The La. Paget, that was very priuate with Queene Eliza∣beth, declared her selfe much, against her Match, with Mon∣sieur. After Mon∣sieurs Page  280 Death, the Queene tooke ex∣treame griefe (at least as shee made shew) And kept within her Bed-Chamber, and one Ante-Chamber, for 3. weekes space, in token of Mour∣ning. At last, shee came forth, into her Priuy-Chamber, and admitted her Ladies, to haue accesse vnto her; And amongst Page  281 the rest, my La. Paget presented her selfe, and came to her, with a smiling countenace The Queene bent her browes, and seem'd to bee highly displea∣sed, and said to her; Madam, you are not ig∣norant, of my extreme griefe, and do you come to mee, with a counte∣nance of ioy? My La∣dy Paget answered; Alas, and it please yourPage  282Maiesty, it is impossi∣ble for me, to be absent from you 3 weekes, but that when I see you, I must looke cheerefully No, no, (said the Queene, not forget∣ting her former a∣uerlenesse from the Match) You haue some other conceit in it; Tell me plainely. My Lady answered; I must obey you. It is this. I was thinking, how happyPage  283your Maiesty was, in that you married not Monsieur: For seeing, you take such thought, for his Death, being but your Friend, if he had beene your Hus∣band, sure it would haue cost you your life.

262. Sir Edward Dyer, a graue and wise Gen∣tleman, did much be∣leeue in Kelley the Alchymist; That hee Page  284 did indeed the worke, and made Gold: In∣somuch, as hee went himselfe into Germa∣ny, where Kelly then was, to informe him∣selfe fully thereof. Af∣ter his returne, he di∣ned with my Lord of Canterbury, where, at that time, was at the Table, Dr. Browne the Phifician. They fell in talke of Kelley. Sir Edward Dyer, Page  285 turning to the Arch∣bishop, said; I doe assure your Grace, that, that I shall tell you, is truth. I am an Eie-witnesse thereof, and if I had not seene it, I should not haue be∣leeued it. I saw Master Kelly put of the base Mettall into the Chru∣sible, and after it was set a little vpon the fire, and a verie small quantitie of the Medi∣cinePage  286put in, and •…tirr'd with a sticke of wood, it came forth in great proportion, perfect Gold, to the Touch, to the Hammer, to the Test. Said the Bishop; You had need take heed, what you say, Sir Ed∣ward Dier, for heere is an Infidel at the Board. Sir Edward Dier said againe pleasantly; I would haue lookt for in Infidell, sooner inPage  287any place, than at your Graces table. What say you Doctor Browne? Saith the Bishop. Dr. Browne answered, af∣ter his blunt, and hudling manner; The Gentleman hath spoken enough for me. Why, (•…aith the Bishop) What hath hee said? Marry, (saith Doctor Browne) he said, he would not haue be∣leeu'd it, except heePage  288bad seene it; And no more will I.

263. Democritus said; That Truth did lie in profound pits, and when it was got, it needed much refining.

264. Dr. Iohnson said; That in sicknesse there were three things, that were materiall: The Physician; the Disease; and the Patient. AndPage  289if any two of these ioy∣ned, then they haue the victorie: For, Ne Hercules quidem con∣tra duos. If the Phy∣sician and the Patient ioyne, then downe goes the Disease; for the Pa∣tient recouers. If the Physician and the Dis∣ease ioyne, then downe goes the Patient; that is, where the Physician mistakes the cure. If the Patient and thePage  290Disease ioyne, then downe goes the Physici∣an; for hee is discre∣dited.

265. Alexander visited Diogenes in his Tub. And when hee askt him; What hee would desire of him? Dioge∣nes answered; That you would stand a little aside, that the Sunne may come to me.

Page  291 266. Diogenes said of a young Man that dan∣ced daintily, and wasmuch commended; The better, the worse.

267. Diogenes called an ill Musician, Cocke. Why? (saith hee:) Diogenes answered; Because when you crow, Men vse to rise.

268. Heraclitus the Ob∣scure sayd; The driePage  292Light was the best Soule. Meaning, when the Faculties Intelle∣ctuall are in vigour, not wet, nor, as it were, blouded by the Affections.

269. There was in Ox∣ford a cowardly Fel∣low, that was a verie good Archer. Hee was abused grossely by another, and moa∣ned himselfe to Walter Page  293 Ralegh, then a Schol∣ler, and askt his ad∣uice; What hee should doe to repaire the wrong had beene offred him? Ralegh answe∣red; Why, challenge him at a match of •…ting.

270. White head, a graue Diuine, was much e∣steemed by Queene Elizabeth, but not preferred, because hee Page  294 was against the go∣uernment of Bishops. Hee was of a blunt Stoicall Nature. Hee came one day to the Queene, and the Queene happened to say to him; I like thee the better, White∣head, because thouliuest vnmarried. Hee an∣swered againe; In troth, Madam, I like you the worse for the same cause.

Page  295 271. There was a No∣ble-man that was leane of visage, but immediately after his Marriage hee grew prettie plumpe & fat. One said to him; Your Lop. doth contrarie to other married Men; for they at the first wax leane, and you wax fat. Sir Walter Ralegh stood by, and sayd; Why, there is no Beast, that if you take himPage  296from the Common, and put him into the Seue∣rall, but hee will wax fat.

272. Diogenes seeing one that was a Ba∣stard, casting stones among the People, bade him take heed, He hit not his Father.

27 Dr. Lawd sayd; That some Hypocrites, and seeming mortifiedPage  297men, that held downe their heads, were like little Images, that they place in the verie bow∣ing of the vaults of Churches, that looke, as if they held vp the Church, but are but Puppets.

274. It was sayd among some of the graue Prelates of the Coun∣cell of Trent, in which the Schoole-Diuines Page  298 bore the sway; That the Schoole-men were like the Astronomers; who, to saue the Pheno∣mena, framed to their conceit Eccentricks, & Epicycles, and a won∣derfull Engine of Orbes, though no such things were: So they, to saue the practise of the Church, had deuised a number of strange Po∣sitions.

Page  299 275. It was also said by many, concerning the Canons of that Coun∣cell; That wee are be∣holding to Aristotle for many Articles of our Faith.

276. The Lo. Henrie Howard, being Lo. Priuie Seale, was askt by the King openly at the Table, (where commonly hee enter∣tained the King) vp∣on Page  300 the sudden. My Lo, haue you not a de∣sire to see Rome? My Lo. Priuie Seale an∣swered; Yes indeed, Sir. The King sayd; And why? My Lo. answered; Because, and it please your Ma∣iestie, it was once the Seat of the greatest Monarchie: And the Seminarie of the bra∣uest men in the world, amongst the Heathen:Page  301And then againe, be∣cause after it was the See of so many holy Bi∣shops in the Primitiue Church, most of them Martyrs. The King would not giue it o∣uer, but sayd; And for nothing else? My Lo. answered; Yes, and it please your Ma∣iestie, for two things e∣specially. The one, to see him, who they say hath such a power, to forgiuePage  302other mens sinnes, to confesse his owne sinnes vpon his knees, before a Chaplaine or Priest: And the other is, to heare Antichrist say his Creed.

277. There was a No∣ble-man sayd of a great Counsellour; That hee would haue made the worst Farrier in the world, for he ne∣uer shod horse, but heePage  303cloyed him: so, he ne∣uer commended any man to the King for seruice, or vpon occa∣sion of sute, or other∣wise, but that he would come in, in the end, with a But, and driue in a naile to his disaduan∣tage.

278. There was a Ladie of the West Country, that gaue great En∣tertainment at her Page  304 House to most of the gallant Gentlemen thereabout: And a∣mongst others, Sir Walter Ralegh was one. This Lady, though otherwise a stately Dame, was a notable good Hus∣wife; and in the mor∣ning betimes, she cal∣led to one of her Maids, that lookt to the Swine, and askt; Is the piggy serued?Page  305 Sir Walter Raleghs Chamber was fast by the Ladies, so as hee heard her. A little before dinner, the Ladie came downe, in great state, into the great chamber, which was full of Gentle∣men: And as soone as Sir Walter Ralegh set eye vpon her; Ma∣dam (saith hee) is the piggie serued? The La. answered; You knowPage  306best, whether you haue had your Breakefast.

279. There was a Gentle∣man fell verie sicke, and a Frend of his said to him; Surely you are in danger; I pray send for a Physician. But the sicke man an∣swered; It is no matter, for if I die, I will die at leisure.

280. There was an Epi∣curean Page  307 vaunted, that diuerse of other Sects of Philosophers, did after turne Epicure∣ans, but there was ne∣uer any Epicurean, that turned to any o∣ther Sect. Wherupon, a Philosopher, that was of another Sect, said; The reason was plaine, for that Cocks may bee made Capons, but Capons could neuer be made Cocks.

FINIS.
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