Dis, dat an' tutter : poems / Elliot Blaine Henderson [electronic text]

De Progress ob Progresshun!

To MR. C. W. WOLF, Columbus Ohio.

Feller citizens ob deez United States, an' extinguished constiterrunts ob de universal domain, an' ladies ob de world-wide expanse:

Ah rize to declah, proclaim, eulogize, expulgate, frustercate, promulgate an' say:

Parogorically on de effulgence ob de glorification an' transcendency ob de progress ob de progresshun ob de twentieth century; frum de time dat Lazarus tarnd Ravens into Buzzahds an' backed up de waters ob de Mississippi ocean, till dey rized so high dat de worl' was in kerclipse.

Dis am er wonderful century! Mos' excroosheatin'. De age in which de posterity ob Adam views back an' down de bullervards ob de ages an' centuries, passed an' comin.'

An' we find dat de bullervard am smoothed an' greased 'slick ez glass by de constant comin' an' passin' ob de various nations, in dey transactions an' doings, in excervatin' de worl'. An' who froo de instrumentality ob providence hab vitooperrated an' sallervated de extremity ob time, necessarily, an' done captivated an' twisted erbout de pinacle ob astronomy an' or-

ganized de horrerscope ob dooterronony an' navigation so enthusiastically in sich er way an' manner ez to digest an' disfranchise de proverbial state ob antiquity beyond de posserbillities ob non realization, an' precipitation.

Yes sah! dis am er great century! Puffeckly mahbellous! An' it devastates, capsizes an' precippertates mah abberrishes mentality, when ah tries to 'splore de great an' mysterical regions ob mystery, fillerbusterin' de reconstruction ob fundermental exclusion an' der jinein' hands wiff circumstances, catchin' de bull ob opposition by de tail an' dahby circumventin' an' preventin' de stoppin' ob de world's progress, an' frenollersizein' de frennerlogical conclusion ob valorism!

An' ez Shakeerspire says we shall 'vance on an' on, till we run pass de stars. Faster den race hosses. Yea! faster den de kyars! De clouds ob oppesition will kerfrollic off wiff strife, an' we'll hab er gyarden ob eeden fo' all ob ah life.