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MRS. Sarah Howley, when she was between Eight and Nine years Old, was carried by her Friends to hear a Sermon, where the Minister Preached upon Matt. 11.••3. My Yoke is easy, and my Burden ••s
light: in the applying of which Scripture, this Child was mightily awakned, and made deeply sensible of the Condition of her Soul, and her need of a Christ,? she wept bitterly to think what a case she was i••; and went home and got by her self into a Chamber, and upon her knees she wept and cryed to the Lord, as well as she could, which might easily be perceived by her eyes and countenance
2. She was not contented at this, but she got her little Brother and Sister into a Chamber with her, and told them of their condition by Nature, and wept over them, and prayed with them and for them.
3, After this she heard another Ser|mon upon Prov. 29.1. He that being often re|proved, hardneth his heart, shall suddenly be de|stroyed, & that without remedy: At which she was more affected than before, and was so exceeding solicitous about her Soul, that ••he spent a great part of the night in weeping and praying, and could scarce take any rest day or night for some time together; desiring with all her Soul to escape from everlasting flames, and to get •••• interest in the Lord Jesus; O what
should she do for a Christ! what should she do to be Saved!
4. She gave her self much to attend|ing upon the Word preached, and still continued very tender under it, greatly savouring what she heard.
5. She was very much in secret Pray|er, as might easily be perceived by those who listened at the Chamber door, and was usually very importunate, and full of tears.
6. She could scarce speak of sin, or be spoke to, but her heart was ready to melt.
7. She spent much time in reading the Scripture, and a Book called, The best friend in the worst of Times; by which the Work of God was much promoted upon her Soul, and was much directed by it how to get acquaintaince with God, especially toward the end of that Book. Another Book that she was much delighted with, was Mr. Swinnock's Christian Mans Calling, and by this she was taught in this measure to make Religion her business. The Spiritual B••e was a great companion of hers.
8. She was exceeding dutiful to her
Parents, very loath to grieve them in the least: and if she had at any time (which was very rare) offended them, she would weep bitterly.
9. She abhorred lying, and allowed her self in no known sin.
10. She was very Conscientious in spending of time, and hated Idleness, and spent her whole time either in pray|ing, reading instructing at her Needle, at which she was very ingenious.
11. When she was at School, she was eminent for her diligence, teachableness, meekness and modesty, speaking little; but when she did speak it was usually spiritual.
12. She continued in this course of Re|ligious duties for some years together.
13. When she was about fourteen years old, she brake a Vein in her Lungs (as is supposed) and oft did spit blood, yet did a little recover again, but had several dangerous relapses.
14. At the beginning of January last, she was taken very bad again, in which sickness she was in great distress of Soul. When she was first taken, she said, O Mother, pray, pray, pray for me, for
Satan is so busy that I cannot pray for my self; I see I am undone without a Christ, and a Pardon! O I am undone unto all Eternity.
15. Her Mother knowing how serious she had been formerly, did a little wonder that she should be in such agonies; up|on which her Mother asked her what sin it was, that was so burdensome to her Spirit: O Mother, said she, it is not any particular sin of Omission or Com|mission, that sticks so close to my Con|science, as the sin of my Nature; with|out the Blood of Christ, that will dam•• me.
16. Her Mother asked her; what she should pray for, for her; she answered, That I may have a saving knowledge of Sin and Christ: and that I may have an assurance of Gods love to my Soul. Her Mother asked her why she did speak so little to the Minister that came to her? She answered that it was her duty with patience and silence to learn of them: and it was exceeding painful to her, to speak to any.
17. One time when she fell into a ••it, she cried out, O I am a going, I am a go|ing:
But what shall I do to be Saved? Sweet Lord Jesus, I will lye at thy feet; and if I perish, it shall be at the Fountain of thy mercy.
18. She was much afraid of presumpti|on, and dreaded a mistake in the mat|ters of her Soul, and would be often putting up ejaculations to God, to deliver her from deceiving her self. To in••tance in one: Great and Mighty God, give me Faith and true Faith, Lord, that I may not be a foolish Virgin, having a Lamp and no Oyl.
19. She would many times be laying hold upon the promises, and plead them in prayer. That in Matt. 11.28, 29. was much in her tongue, and no small relief to her Spirit. How many times would she cry out, Lord, hast not thou said, Come unto me all ye that are weary, and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
20. Another time her Father bid her be of good cheer, because she was going to a better Father; at which she fell into a great passion, and said, but how do I know that? I am a poor sinner that wants assurance O, for assurance! It was still her note, O, for assurance! This was
her great, earnest, and constant request, to all that came to her, to beg assurance for her; and, poor heart, she would look with so much eagerness upon them, as if she desired nothing in the world so much, 〈◊〉〈◊〉 that they would pitty her, and help her with their prayers; never was poor creature more earnest for any thing, than she was for an assurance; and the Light of Gods Countenance: O the piteous moan that she would make! O the Agonies that her Soul was in!
21. Her Mother ask'd her, if God would spare her Life, how she would live? Truly Mother, said she, we have such base hearts that I can't tell, we are apt to promise great things when we are sick, but when we are recovered, we are as ready to forget our selves and to turn again unto folly; but I hope I should lie more careful of my Time and my Soul, than I have been.
22. She was full of natural affection to her Parents, and very careful least her Mother should be tired out with much watching: Her Mother said, ••how shall bear parting with thee, when I have scar•••• dryed my eyes for thy Brother? she answered, the
God of love, support and comfort you; it is but a little while, and we shall meet in Glory, I hope. She being very weak, could speak but little, therefore her Mother said, Child, if thou hast any co••fort, lift up thy hand; which she did.
23. The Lords day before that, in which she died, a Kinsman of hers came to see her, and asking of her, whether she knew him? She answered, Yes, I know you, and I desire you would learn to know Christ: you are young, but you know not how soon you may die; and O to die without a Christ, it is a fearful thing: O redeem Time! O Time, T••me, Time, precious Time! Being requested by him not to spend herself, she said, she would fain do all the good she could while she lived, and when she was dead too, if possile; upon which account, she de|sired that a Sermon might be Preached at the Funeral, concerning the pr••cious|ness of Time. O that young ones would now remember their Creator!
24. Some Minister that came to her, did with earnestness beg that the Lord would please to give her some token for good, that she might go off triumphing, and Bills of the same nature were sent to several Churches.
25. After she had long waited for an answer of their prayers, she said, Well, I will venture my Soul upon Christ.
26. She carried it with wonderful pa|tience, and yet would often pray that the Lord would give her more patience, which the Lord answered to astonish|ment; for considering the pains and agonies that she was in, her patience was next to a wonder; Lord, Lord, give me patience, said she, that I may not dishonour thee.
27. Upon Thursday, after long wait|ing, great Fears, and many Prayers, when all her Friends thought she had been past speaking, to the astonishment of her Friends, she broke forth thus with a very Audible Voice, and Cheerful Countenance; Lord, thou hast promised, that whosoever comes unto thee, thou wilt in no wise ••ast out; Lord I come unto thee, and surely thou wilt not cast me out. O so sweet! O so glorious is Jesus! O I have the sweet and glorious Jesus; he is sweet, he is sweet, he is sweet! O the admirable love of God ••n sending Christ! O free Grace to a poor lost Creature. And thus she ran on repeating many of these things an hundred times
over; but her Friends were so astonished to see her in this Divine Rapture, and to hear such Gracious Words, and her Prayers and Desires satisfied, that they could not write a quarter of what she spoke.
28. When her Soul was thus ravished with the love of Christ, and her tongue so highly engaged in the magnifying of God; her Father, Brethren, and Si••ters, with others of the Family, were called, to whom she spake particularly, as her strength would give leave. She gave her Bible as a Legacy to one of her Brothers, and desired him to use that well for her sake, & added, to him & the rest, O make use of time to get a Christ for your Souls; spend no time in running up and down in playing: O get a Christ for your Souls while you are young; re|member now your Creator before you come to a sick bed: put not off this great work till then, for then you will find it a hard work indeed. I know by expe|rience, the Devil will tell you it is time enough; and you are young, what need you to be in such hast? You will have time enough when you are old. But
there stands one (meaning her Grand|mother) that stayes behind, and I that am but young, am going before her. O therefore make your Calling and Election sure, while you are in health. But I am afraid this will be but one nights trouble to your thoughts; but remember, these are the words of a dying Sister. O if you knew how good Christ were! O if you had but one taste of his sweetness, you would rather go to him a thousand times than stay in this wicked world. I would not for ten thousand, and ten thousand worlds part with my interest in Christ. O how happy am I, that I am going to everlasting Joys! I would not go back again for twenty thousand worlds; and will you not strive to get an Interest in Christ?
29. After this, looking upon one of her Fathers Servants, she said, What shall I do? What shall I do at the great Day, when Christ shall say to me, Come, thou Blessed of my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for thee. And shall say to the wicked, Go, thou Cursed into the Lake that burns for ever. What a grief is it for me to think, that I shall see any of my friends
that I knew upon Earth, turned into that Lake that burns forever! O that word, For Ever, remember that, For Ever! I speak these words to you, but they are nothing, except God speak to you too: O pray, pray, pray, that God would give you Grace! And then 〈◊〉〈◊〉 prayed, O Lord finish thy work upon their Souls. It will be my comfort to see you in Glory, but it will be your Everlasting happiness.
30. Her Grand-mother told her she spent her self too much; he said; I care not for that, if I could do any Soul good. O with what vehemency did she speak, as if her heart were in every word she spoke.
31. She was full of Divine Sentences, and almost all her discourse, fr••m the fir••t to the last, in the time of her ••ick|ness, was about her Soul, Christs sweet|ness, and the ••ouls of others; in a word, like a continued Sermon.
32. Upon Fryday, after she had had such lively discoveries of Gods love, ••he was exceeding desirous to dye, and cryed out, Come Lord Jesus, come quickly, conduct me to thy Tabernacle, I am a poor Creature without thee: but Lord Jesus, my Soul longs
to be with thee: O when shall it be! Why not now, dea•• Jesus? Come Lord Jesus, come quickly; but why do I speak thus? Thy ••••me, dear Lord, is the best; O give me pa|tience!
33. Upon Saturday she spoke very little (being very drowsie) yet now and then dropt these words: How long sweet J••sus? Finish thy work sweet Jesus, Come away sweet dear Lord Jesus, come quickly,; sweet Lord help, come away, now, now, dear Jesus come quickly; Good Lord give patience to me to wait thy appointed time; Lord Jesus help me, help me, help me. Thus at several times (when out of her sleep) for she was asleep the greatest part of the day.
34. Upon the Lord's day, she scarc•• spoke any thing, but much desired that Bills of thanksgiving might be sent to those who had formerly been praying for her, that they might help her to praise God for that full assurance that he had given her of His love; and seemed to be much swallowed up with the thoughts of Gods free love to her Soul. She oft commended her Spirit into the Lords hands; and the last words which she was heard to speak, were these, Lord help,
Lord Jesus help; Dear Jesus, Blessed Jesus— And thus upon the Lords Day, between Nine and Ten of the Clock in the fore|noon, she slept sweetly in Jesus, and began an Everlasting Sabbath, February 19. 1670.